008 - The World pt.07
#8 of Beastiary Beas Part 1 - A Valentines Story
You know who's bullshit? Friends, they're bullshit. Fuck these absolute losers. Butters storms into the kitchen and starts on the drinks they had prepared for everyone. Rum already!? Yeah fuck it, who cares? Double? Triple? Let's go. They didn't need any of these fools with their relationships or not dedicating their entire daily routine to their super cool friend Butters. 'Sides, they were pretty much on their jack jones on previous Valentine's, like this is no different! They're still gonna mack on a million people and it'll be the greatest. A MILLION.
After a two jab combo of triple Jack, Butters starts gathering their essentials to start heading out the door, get out of this house which for tonight Butters has christened: RejectsVille. After grabbing their wallet, keys and that, they pass by a bottle with it's twist off cap placed next to it. Ahhh that niggling feeling Butters had the entire time they've been home, a feeling they had forgotten something, there it iisss. A new prescription with some unpronounceable name they reckon would help with their BPD symptoms, like they say; 'Seventh times a charm.'
Well you can't drink 'n take them and there's no way in hell they weren't on the sauce tonight. Butters reckons the dutch courage leading to sex thing was better medicine for the soul anyways. Alright Butters had it all figured out, they'd head out to the lonely hearts night at the Evermore pub, then pray they bump into someone they know. No one responded to their Facey Bee post about going out tonight, but someone had to be right? Once they met some new faces too, they'd take everyone and go to one of the big Valentines nights and boom, jobs a gooden. Sadly Butters couldn't go to their regular: The Hound Of Tyre, since it was closed to people booking valentines dinner, almost as if the pub felt like MAKING MONEY or something like that? Capitalist dogs the bunch of 'em. Oh well, Butters was gonna retake this night! After more glasses of Triple Rum then any Monster should feasibly be able to handle, they prepare to set off! Butters has the travel plan down: Get to the Evermore pub, but not before a pitstop down for some chilli cheese bites of course. They'll be full of rum, full of food, and ready to mingle. OKAY! Butters was ready to take this night on. Despite all the odds tonight was gonna rule. So. Many. Cuties.
Butters opens the front door and with one foot out of the door looks back on the now empty house with slight trepidation. They sigh slightly, the sigh of whatever version of themselves began at the start of night, who knows full well they are about to do something profoundly stupid. But wished someone was here to stop them, knowing full well something impulsive was about to take the wheel for the rest of the night.
....Nothing.
And right on cue, their eyelids lower and smile begins to creep on their face. They close the door and head down the street singing:
-Let's go fucking mental, Let's go fucking...