The Power of Love (the teaser intro)
Okay this is the intro/teaser of a story I'm working on. I just wanted to post it to see what kind of responces I'd get and to see if anyone had some pointers at to what I could work on to make it any better. This is the first story I've ever written so please don't be really hard on me but feel free to point out anything you see that needs work. Also this work contains hints of a M/M relationship so if you don't like it don't read it.
The .45 caliber pistol gleamed in the small amount of lite that was present in the dark ally, the source of the lite was a small security light positioned above a solid steel door at the back of my own video games store. I glanced down at the dead dragon/wolf at my feet, his dark fur almost completely hiding the blood that had run out of his head wound. Seeing my mate dead at my feet should have caused my to cry, but instead I was strangely comforted by the fact that we would soon be reunited. With my back pressed against the brick wall, my snow white fur getting filthy from the grimy bricks, I looked away from my dead lover laying on the cold (and now blood stained) concrete and back to his shooter. The wolf standing in front of me I knew, he was my ex mate Damian. Damian's silver and white fur seemed to shine in even this small amount of light, a drastic contrast to his black sleeveless shirt and dark pants. I could easily see the mussels that I had more than once ran my paws over, those soft blue eyes I had thought were so sweet looking, and that face that I had kissed so many times. Then he spoke, the pistol smoothly moving from my dead lover to my head."I told you when we first met, you will be my mate to the end and that no one else could have you. I've just proven what I said and now I'm going to make sure that no else will ever try to take you again." He said in his gentle and soft voice, a quality that had attracted me to him when I first met him all those years ago. I didn't say anything back to him, I knew what he was here to do and I welcomed it, for with out my mate I saw no reason to live. "I really expected some sort of anger from you, some half baked plan to strike back at me because I shot your mate. Well I'll just end it then." He said, then taking careful aim he pulled the trigger. Time slowed to a crawl as the trigger reached the back of the trigger gard. The gunshot was strangely muffled as the gunpowder went off pushing the bullet slowly out of the barrel, the gas causing the slide to move back ejecting the brass and causing it to tumble end over end before hitting the ground. As the recoil forced his paw back, the mussels on his arm rippled under his glossy fur, the bullet finally made it's to my head. The impact caused my head to snap back and hit the bricks; a sickening cracking fills my ears. There is no pain just a numbing feeling that slowly crept down my body. I felt detached from my body as blood dribbled down my forehead and my face turning my white fur crimson. My body then slid down the wall still in slow motion. There was no outer body experience, no flashing of my life, just darkness creeping in from the corner of my eyes.
As my red eyes started to glass over my shooter, my ex mate, and my mate's killer pulled the trigger multiple times. The eight additional rounds tore into my dieing body, putting holes in both my favorite shirt, the black one with the dragon on the front, and the flesh of my chest. The rounds tried to find my heart but they only found the mussel and bone of a dead fox, the dead dragon had already taken it with him when he died. As the darkness closed completely over me I saw no more of that world, heard no more, and didn't care about it anymore. Just as I thought I was headed to heaven I heard my lover's voice, "You get one more, I won't let such a wonderful life be taken from this world." he said softly in the voice I had gotten to know better than my own, then as I felt a familiar pair of lips on my own and two warm arms wrap around me I fell into a pool of darkness so complete words cannot describe.
"NO!" I shouted as I through the covers off a bed that was not my own but was strangely familar. Looking around I saw a room covered in shadows making every thing seem like they had soft fuzzy eadges. When a beautiful wolf in her 30's with hazle eyes and light gray fur opend the door to my right with a look of confusion and worry on her face I gasped. "Fawkes what's wrong?" She asked as I staired at her in horror for the wolf in front of me was my mother who had died seven years ago. "Oh dear god!" I choked out as I knew what had happened. Right then my eyes rolled back in my head and I passed out. I hered her shouting for my step dad to call 911 as the same darkness that had attacked me before covered me again.