Furry is my Religion
Call me Nimrod Math Gymnetesia. I've lived in my parents' basement for thirty years now. My laptop sits on an old black desk my grandfather had given me. It still smells of tobacco from when he used to smoke while doing his taxes. I don't mind the smell, though; I have plenty of fans to circulate the air around the room. There are some lamps in the corners so I have enough light to see clearly, and I have a mini-fridge and cupboard so I don't have to go to the kitchen for food (well, until I run out that is). I've been a furry for twenty-two years now. You might call it an obsession, but I prefer to call it a lifestyle, a vocation.
Mom usually comes down at around four o'clock to bring me milk and cookies, but lately she's been a real pain in the ass. She tells me the doctor says I need to eat more healthy foods, but I don't eat celery and apple slices. I'm a born collie dog and dogs eat two things: meat and grass. I don't like the taste of grass, though, so I substitute it for hot dogs. Yeah, milk and cookies aren't healthy for a dog, either, but, I'm no ordinary dog; I'm an anthro-dog. I howl at the moon and lick my balls. I'm not gay, so don't ask me out on a date; unless you're a girl - but not my mom, because that's disgusting. Anyway, today is a hot day.
All the fans are on full blast. I've decided to take off my clothes and just sit naked for the rest of the day. My balls are sticking to the chair. I give them a scratch. The basement door swings open with a loud squeak and I hear footsteps coming down the concrete stairs. I wonder who it could be? Sweat pours down my forehead. I'm too afraid to turn around and look. I keep my eyes glued to the blue Fchan window, hoping whoever is coming for me won't be offended by the furry smut. The footsteps get closer.
I start to panic; what if the person is a police officer or a special agent? I know I've downloaded music before, but is stealing really illegal? I quickly close the dozens of windows I have open and begin to delete my folders. The footsteps keep getting louder. My palms start to sweat. In desperation I slam my laptop shut and spin about like a madman, ready to kill whoever dares to trespass into my home. It was mom with a tray of celery and apple slices. I look at the clock on the wall. The little hand is on the twelve and the big hand is on the four. Right on time, I think. How many times must a dog say No to healthy foods? How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie pop? The world may never know...for now, at least.
"Mom, what the fuck is this?" I snort with disgust.
"Celery and apple slices," she cheerfully replies.
"You know I don't eat none of that shit!" I bark.
"The doctor says--" I interrupted her by kicking the tray out of her hands, sending the snacks on a flying adventure.
Okay I didn't really do that, but I would have if I had more guts. Instead I just took the tray and threw it away. After mom left I went back to surfing for hawt furry porno (By the way, do girls say "porn" or "porno"? I'm trying to learn the moonspeak for when I decide to get a sex change). Like most normal dog-furs I enjoy fapping to pictures of animals in diapers shitting themselves. Only retards and cowards like to look at human porn. As I fap my heart away I begin to fantasize about meeting a giant dragoness in diapers and getting to fill her tailhole with my dog cock.
I knot her. She holds onto my butt as I turn around and I begin to fuck her. Shit spews out from the hem of her depends. Suddenly my bowels let loose and I make a dash for the upstairs bathroom. As I run up the stairs as fast as I can I can feel crap running down my legs and falling onto the steps. I make it just in time to let out a huge green dump. It feels so fantastic that I just sit there for ten minutes, savoring the sensation. After I wipe my ass I go back downstairs. I hear my mother screaming after me about the mess I made. I lock the door and resume my porn search. Dogs don't have to clean up their messes; we aren't humans.
The dragoness takes off her smelly diaper and gags me with it. It's still warm. She goes down to suck my cock like a pro. As her head bobs up and down the shaft I can feel myself ready to climax. Virgins tend to come early, but the dragoness understands. She licks up my cum and uses her long slimy tongue to suck on my tailhole. It's magical. I feel her clean my hole whole up the way a whore would, working her way through my rectum while enjoying every single drop of scat. She even sniffs my butt, which gets me rock hard. She can tell I'm going to cum again. But she's busy playing with my butt, so what can she do? The dinosaur takes her tongue out and wraps it around my cock. It turns into a brown stick. Like a popsicle, only a lot tastier. I can feel my body getting hot. The slut sucks me down again.
"Cum for me!" she begs.
"...K!" is all I can reply.
My cock splits in half down the middle as it erupts like an angry volcano, spraying forth an explosion of spunk so powerful that it drowns the entire city. Everyone survives, but they're all covered in my hot gooey sperm. As I marvel at the destructive power of the penis I snap out of my dream. Mom drags me upstairs by the ear to clean up my mess - either with the proper tools or my tongue, she says. I choose the former, because as much as I love poop I can't stand the taste of it. Same with cum. I make sure to make the floor shine. I go back down to rest, my body just falling on the bed in exhaustion. But I suddenly have the urge to go back online. I do so, and now I have finished my story. Everything in it is true, only my name is changed to protect my identity. It's an anagram, you see. I hope you enjoyed my dragoness as much as I enjoy her. Please don't bash on my religion. More stories to come soon! <3