The Devil May Care 49

Story by draconicon on SoFurry

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#55 of The Devil May Care

A little flit around Hell and Heaven to show the other things happening behind the scenes.

Commissioned by DuskCypher

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The Devil May Care

Part 49

for DuskCypher

by Draconicon

"Hot buns! Get your hot buns here!"

The calls of the baker echoed down the street of the little market that had set up just down the road from the rubble of the old Diel house, and his weren't the only shouts that were echoing up and down the narrow, stall-lined streets that formed a bizarre bazaar of food sellers and treat-tellers. There were dozens of different cuisines, most of them enchanted with the same curse that lined all of Gluttony: the more that you had, the more you wanted to get.

Of course, this baker - a rotund elephant that had not yet been beaten down by the old style of Gluttony - was eager to keep his customers coming, and since he had to cut costs across the board to afford the Soulari rent that his space required, he caught up by cutting some of the enchantments. It meant that he sold less, because there were never enough people that stayed hungry to keep coming back to him, and that allowed him to cut more costs on the ingredients by not needing nearly as many of them as the others.

More to the point, it meant that he had the rare business in Gluttony that actually satisfied its customers in the physical sense while always leaving them wanting that little bit more, eager to come back to his shop the next time that they were passing through the area. It was a good business model, and he was surprised that most of the different travelers passing through on the way to the Diel house were so dead-set on being down about it.

"Hot buns! Get your hot buns here!" he called out again, and this time, a pair of boars stopped, pulling off the path to look at his goods. He grinned, pushing the hot trays of black steel forward. "Yes, yes, take a look at the buns. Got beef and veg, if you don't want to commit cannibalism."

"Why would we decline the succulent sin?" one of the boars joked. "Give me ten."

"You won't be able to finish that," the elephant said.

"Do you doubt my power?"

"Just saying."

"Twenty!"

"Coming right up."

As he cut apart the hot buns, he could hear the chatting with one another as if he wasn't even there. Not the first time that that had happened, and he seriously doubted that it would be the last. Mortal or demon, everyone was an asshole on the other side of the counter.

"Can you believe it? All these new people, selling food out here?"

"It's a disgrace, is what it is. What happened to the House of Diel? The House of Lar'rd?"

"Gone, that's what. That's what you get for standing up for the old ways, these days."

The baker kept his mouth carefully shut. He disagreed with the both of them, but he doubted that it would be a good idea to say so. He was making bank out here, and he knew for a fact that there were others that were doing just as well. Some of them were even rising up as 'new money' here in Gluttony, something that people like these boars didn't really like.

He hadn't clocked them, at first, but now that he was taking a second look, he could see the marks along their suits. Spit-slimes that marked them as higher-ranking demons in Gluttony. Not quite members of the noble houses, like Diel had been, but Brutus had been among the highest of the high in Gluttony, barely keeping from taking the leadership of the realm. There had been no other that was willing to take that role, but now that the old man was gone...

Well, it was only a matter of time before someone started pushing for it. There was no ceiling up there to hold them down, no scary boar that was waiting to shove them back into their place. Just that opening, and those that were hungry to take it.

Unfortunately, most of those that were hungry for it were the sort that didn't like the changes that Brutus's abrupt departure had caused. Most of those that had the power to reach for it were rapidly losing their monopoly as the system opened up. The elephant was just one of many that had started building up a personal fortune in the same way that the realm of Greed had started opening up to the lower classes. Upwards mobility had become a thing, and most of the demons that had been at the top still didn't like that. They probably never would, considering that the production of goods that the rising demons like him provided meant that their status didn't count for as much anymore.

He bagged up the buns as they kept talking.

"You think that we're going to find anymore traitors on the walk?"

"I think that it's possible. The last bazaar was full of them."

The elephant demon's ears twitched. Traitors? Last bazaar? He had friends down the road, where another of these shopping 'towns' had popped up. Now that there were no taxes from the Diel house to be paid, there were people selling food everywhere to get out from under that overhead. He had friends down there that had been making it good, talking about starting their own House.

"Yeah, but we cooked them."

Cooked them?

"Wasn't that good a meal, though."

"Yeah, but you just know it sent a message."

"Heh, that smoke will warn the rest of 'em off for a while."

So, that's what he had seen yesterday. There had been a fume of black smoke down the road, and most of the merchants had just assumed that the other town had opened up a barbecue. It seemed that they had, but the meat being smoked had been more the thinking sort and less the normal sort. He went a little green in the face, burying his head in the work of saucing up the buns properly.

"Least this place seems to be quiet," one of the boars said.

"Yeah, but it ain't going to last. Not unless we do something about that cat."

"He'll come down, eventually."

"What if he doesn't?"

"Then we'll make him. You heard what Pride's offering."

"The old ways, a new leader..."

"Just gotta make sure that they get what they want."

The elephant kept his head down, wishing that he could cover his ears without giving away that he was hearing them. The last thing that he wanted was to get dragged into politics, but there was little choice when they were thrusting these plans on him. Good Hell, this was bad.

What if...

The baker had made some good Soulari over the last few days. He knew that he had some surplus, though not nearly enough to open up a store in one of the towns in Gluttony. He needed more than this. But if he went running now, if he left Gluttony and started making his way to the realm of Greed...

It was a bit of a risk, but if there was any realm that would acecpt stragglers from the other realms, it would be Greed. They wanted everything there. It'd be expensive, and there'd be a different sort of premium to pay, but maybe they'd be a little more open to someone new there. Someone that had something good, profitable to work with. That had to be a realm that was still on the side of the black cat, right? People there still supported him.

Or at least, that was what the elephant was desperately hoping.

"Your buns," he said, passing the bags of them over the counter. The two boars nodded, taking them and biting out several large chunks. A few minutes later, the bags were tossed out, half the buns still inside and the boars groaning under their breaths about how full they were. They started making their way down the road, grunting and shaking their heads. Despite it all, they were still calling back about how good it was.

He waved politely after them, then, as soon as they were out of sight, pulled the platters of buns back in. It was time for him to start packing up before someone else like them started coming through this little bazaar. If he got going now, then maybe he could get the hell out before the borders between the realms were completely closed, and maybe, just maybe, he'd be able to afford what he needed before Greed jacked the prices up for foreigners.

Against all business sense and hunger for money, he left the rest of the buns that he couldn't carry out in the open. Maybe someone would grab them for free, maybe they would rot in the streets. He didn't know, and at that moment, he didn't particularly care, either. What mattered was that they weren't going to weigh him down and slow him down. He needed to get the hell out.

As he shouldered what he could of his baking gear, from the trays to the oils to the various souls that he did stir into the ingredients for that particularly deadly meat taste, he kept one eye on the road. He had to be ready to run, and if that meant leaving some things behind...well, so be it. The realm of Gluttony could have been better, but if the higher-ups were ready to sign their souls over to Pride for the sake of turning back the clock again, he wasn't going to be here for it. He was going to be somewhere where his skills were valued, where he had a chance to make it better, and where he had a chance to build up a personal fortune.

Maybe I got a Greed demon in my family tree somewhere, he thought with a rueful chuckle. I'm certainly thinking like them...

He managed to get everything but his mega-oven packed up, and it was with a heavy heart that he left that behind. That had been his first real investment, and he'd barely had enough business to pay it off in the first few days. It was going to be expensive to replace, but not as expensive as waiting for someone to come around to shrink it down or make it easier to travel with. He shrugged off its loss, using that to feed his hunger for success, and made his way up the road and then towards the hills that led towards Greed.

The baker managed to make it about three miles before the smell of smoke filled his nose. He lifted his trunk, confirmed that it was the same sort of smell that he'd caught on the horizon before, and looked over his shoulder. Back at the bazaar, flames leaped from one business to another, from one stall to another wagon. The fires burned hot and high, and the flecks of people running between them was all the more distressing when you thought about how much friendliness there had been among the demons and their creations.

He put that out of his mind and turned around, keeping his eyes down and fixed on the road. Someone would notice that the elephant bun baker wasn't there, eventually, and there might just be a man-hunt. The other Gluttony demons that wanted to go back to the old ways were hungry for power, but very, very stupid about it. The Pride demons that were giving 'advice' on how to do it, however, were very, very smart. He knew that they would want to keep the body count high, to show what it meant to be a 'traitor' to the realm of Gluttony and their plans for it. The elephant didn't plan to be a statistic.

He planned to be a success.

Here's hoping that the border's still open...

Across the border in Greed, things were booming. In Guild City, they were booming quite spectacularly, as a matter of fact, though in a far more metaphorical sense than they were in Wrath. Businesses of all sorts had sprung up almost overnight, what with the wealth of souls that were coming in from Purgatory, and everyone and their cousin had the means of starting up a business. Sure, that meant that the cost of things were going up, too - supply and demand did mean that there was a much greater cost for things, now that there was more money to spend on them - but so far, the supply of Soulari was more than keeping pace with the rising costs.

However, there were most definitely those that were not keen on the change, and they were, as ever, those that had been the brokers of power before the change.

Hellsmith, preeminent crafter of the oldest Guilds of Guild City, as well as Amador - a goat demon with a long, black-dyed goatee - stepped out of one of the newest businesses. Leaving the pub behind and brushing the bubbles of residual beer off their faces, they made their way down the lively main street that cut through the center of the city. They had a lot to say. Well, Amador had a lot to say. Hellsmith was more in the business of listening.

"It's just not right," the goat said, shaking his head. "All these new things, no class, no organization, no pride."

"Mm-hmm."

"Nothing needed here. All these things, no point."

"Mm-hmm."

"Well, except that," the goat said, nodding towards a bakery that was approaching on their right. "That's not that bad."

"Good bagels," Hellsmith hedged.

"And doughnuts. And pastries."

As Amador started digging into other goods that the bakery sold, they were all but forced to take a turn, crossing the street and stepping inside. The fresh smell of well-made, fresh-baked bread and product hit them both like a fluffy pillow to the face, and the constantly-complaining Amador stopped talking. For all of three seconds, that was, before placing an order to go.

Hellsmith leaned back against the wall near the door, looking down the street. For all that he wasn't as vocal, he had to admit that he had some similar feelings to all the new businesses that were popping up all over the place. None of them were run by the old families, and the Guilds themselves were losing ground. While he wasn't an owner of a Guild himself, nor was he part of them, he was among their circle and had been respected among them as a craftsman. All his orders had come from those on the Council of Oligarchs, and he was as good as one of them himself.

Now, the Council itself was losing some of their prestige, too, with their wealth being distributed further and further among the commons, having to buy up interest in their own products, buying and reselling the goods that were made in the small businesses, and just in general having to buy as much as they had to sell. That was not the way that it was supposed to go; Greed made things, sold things, and that was the end of it. The rich did not have to buy; they just had more of the things that they wanted to sell.

But now that the common demons of Greed had the chance to do whatever they wanted, to buy and sell and open businesses the way that the Guilds did...

"Bagel?"

Amador's offer was accepted, and they left the bakery again, walking down the street. The goat continued his complaining as the badger nibbled away at the fruit and cream-cheese bagel, surprised as ever at the sheer fluffiness and goodness that it had compared to the old stuff that they'd been getting.

"See, the fact of the matter is, we were doing just fine in the old ways. We didn't need all this bullshit. And look what happens when you let the common people try. Just can't get it right. See? A seed out of place."

"Shameful," the badger said, shrugging his shoulders.

"It's just a seed, admittedly, but it's the principal of the thing. You don't sell a substandard good, whether it's going in your guts or not."

And it was definitely going down the goat's guts, filling his stomach right then and there, and probably doing more than that, besides. Amador had gone through two sandwiches and three bagels in the short time since they'd left the bakery, and was still working on more.

"Still, better than the pub," Hellsmith said.

"Anything is better than that pub."

"Flat beer."

"Stale chips."

"Horrible fries."

"Greasy everything."

"Then again, even grease has its charm," the badger admitted.

"Oh, don't get me started. There's a time and a place for everything, but it should be intentional, not accidental."

They both nodded in agreement at that, and soon, the baked goods were gone, right back down to their guts and filling them to the brim and then some. Like their cousins in Gluttony, however, the Greed demons were far from satisfied, and if anything, needed something more. Amador cast his eyes about, as if looking for another piece of inspired complaining, only to set his eyes on a curio shop. The goat demon rolled his eyes.

"And look at that. Something that's just random. What's the point of a shop without focus?" Amador asked.

"No idea. Can't be good."

"Probably just someone that doesn't know what else to do."

"Ugh. Fuck that."

"Let's check it out."

And so they did, crossing the street once more and stepping into the curio shop. Almost instantly, they were surrounded by various little knickknacks that resembled demons and monsters, little figures that were shaped in various styles, from the stretched, slender styles of nightmares to the gluttonous dreams of their cousins a realm down. There were statuettes of sultry female demons, and virility idols of great males. There were collector sets of different swords, shields, and other weapons that had been carried to war, and there were far more things besides.

It stirred the collector's instincts in both of them, and by the time that they left, they were weighed down by more bags than either of them could quite believe. In fact, the badger and goat stopped just outside the shop, looked at each other, and then looked at the bags that were hanging off their wrists.

"Did we..." Amador blinked.

"...Did I..."

"That spear was exquisite," the goat admitted.

"And the trading cards of the Torture Plains were quite well-drawn..."

"And it's not the same without the whole set..."

"And the variety has its charm."

"Something for everyone."

"A customer for every product."

"I suppose it has a point," Amador admitted. "But just a small one! And it's not like everyone could do something like that. There has to be some luck involved."

There was always luck involved, but these days, the luck seemed to trickle downwards rather than being channeled upwards. They were wasting money, time, and energy trying to keep themselves afloat, while the success seemed to flock to those just starting out.

They tried to tell themselves that it was just a phase, that the market with equal everything out again eventually, but there was something about it that seemed off this time around. The market hadn't self-corrected yet, and there was something to the way that it was going that made both of them wonder if it actually would this time.

Dusk had done a great deal to change Greed, and neither of them were entirely keen on it. The new outlet of souls from Purgatory meant that they were at least getting a good cut of the business, but the fact that it was open to everyone that was willing to pay the tax, rather than just being a toll booth that required the payment before even going through, meant that there were too many competitors. There was market saturation, and the inflation that was still ongoing meant that there were those that just weren't able to keep up with the new costs.

Thankfully, most of the Guilds were still standing, though some of those that had been bad-off before the whole collapse of the economy hadn't survived the recovery, and more than a third of all the start-ups failed, allowing the Guilds to sweep in and pick up their assets at a low cost. It wasn't their best business, but it was better than going out of business, they all agreed.

And it was all due to Dusk.

Hellsmith wondered, as Amador kept complaining, if Dusk still considered him a friend or an ally. He wondered if he still was.

There wasn't a real incentive to turn against Dusk. Not yet. There were other things that the Pride demons could offer, certainly, and there was pride to be had in keeping one's own office without having to share it with those further below him. That said, there was no guarantee that the Sertus family could actually deliver on any of the promises that they were making, particularly with the connections to Purgatory. If Greed lost that again, then the markets would dry up, and then the stockpiles of goods would be worthless, and...

Well, the economy had recovered once. There was no guarantee that it would do that again.

The demons continued wandering down the bustling street, complaining about everything that they could find. They would complain about a restaurant, only to go in and find that it was actually quite nice, if a little strange and oddly spiced. They would complain about a bookstore, only to come out with a week's worth of reading. They went into a new smithy, and came out with stylish armor for that new party in a week's time.

There was always something that was new, something that was different, something that grabbed their attention and made them admit that maybe this business had a point, had a redeeming quality. Sure, that was possible here...

But never, ever, ever at that pub.

The tiger that was theoretically supposed to watch over the entire universe was neglecting his duties in order to pay attention to a small part of a realm that was not, technically, his responsibility. It was not even a realm that had earned his ire, not the way that the rest of Hell had, nor even to the point where he would be that inclined to do much to it when the day of fire and war and death finally came. With Pestilence running rampant across the world, he knew that the other horsemen would need to be released eventually, but for now...

For now, he would focus on this, and listen. His agents in Sloth had been busy, busier than they were inclined to be, and only the offer of holy reward, forgiveness, and uplift allowed them to keep working to the degree that he required of them. Even now, they were slacking off, trying to drift towards something that was a little less extreme, but his presence on the other side of this portal, combined with the reminder that he could always be watching, kept them from slacking too often.

He was silent now, however, listening with bated breath as the different members of a plot that they were so sure was their own assembled in the house of his agent.

First, Darith Sertus. The lion was quite the aged figure of Pride, quintessential, logical, and more than a little bit emotional about the proper way to get things done. That said, if there was someone that God would have picked to put in charge of Hell rather than Lucifer - and someone that would understand the proper way that things were supposed to run - he believed that House Sertus, and Darith in particular, would have been a good choice. The lion had a certain backbone that God would have had to grind out of him, but he would have been one of those rulers that understood the practicalities of rulership, and would have been willing to give and take.

Then, there was the representative from Wrath. A bear woman, one that came from House Judas. Melisande, he believed her name was, though he had been unwilling to actually look it up, uninterested in the particulars of a demon's name. It didn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

And one that is so willing to turn against her chances of a better life...

Contrary to all those myths about himself that he had allowed to build up over the years, God had little interest in the better lives of those below him. What mattered was that they had faith in him, that they were willing to allow themselves to submit to his grand plan and allow him to guide them, all while worshiping his greatness. If they did that, then in his eyes, they were good, and he found that those that were stupid were generally much more capable of that. Stupidity encouraged greater reliance on those with bigger, better minds.

That, however, didn't mean that he couldn't see that she was self-sabotaging. By turning her back on the black cat, she was denying herself the one chance that Wrath actually had to recover and become strong again. He was glad that she had decided against it, but her fear and paranoia, scarcely disguised by the anger that she carried with her, was fooling her into believing that she had made a choice that would protect her and her people.

He encouraged that. He liked his enemies making stupid choices.

Last, there was a pig. Not a boar, but a pig, one that was wiping soot from his sweaty face as he walked into the warm, darkened room that the agent of Sloth had prepared for this meeting. He chuckled, shaking out his suit a few times.

"Sorry I'm late. Had to take care of some traitors on the road. What did I miss?" the Gluttony demon asked.

"Nothing. Yet." Darith glanced sideways at the bear of House Judas. "Though I am surprised to see one of you here."

"I'm here to see if there's anything worthwhile for my family. That's all," Melisande said.

"If you don't have an offer, then you are not welcome," the pig said. "Take a hike, before you kill us all."

"I could do that. I could do that very, very easily, pork-belly."

"You think that you could take me?"

"I know I can. And I'm going to, if you don't shut the hell up."

"Madame."

Darith's voice cut in, and God nodded ever so slightly to himself, the tiger approving as much as he could ever approve of a demon. The lion had allowed the exchange to go on just long enough to settle the two of them as rivals, and to establish himself as the reasonable one between them. Very nicely handled.

"I believe that we all have reasons to be here," Darith said, the lion adjusting his suit jacket for a moment before rolling his head from side to side, the silver strands of his mane falling over his face. "And that reason all boils down to one man. One...Dusk Von Doom."

The Wrath demon gave an uncharacteristic shudder, and Gluttony's representative growled under his breath. God could not have planned this better. It was all falling into place.

You started too much, Dusk, God thought. You should have allowed Armageddon to happen. You should have let it come to be, so that it could all be done and settled. Instead, you decided that you wanted to fight.

And what a humiliating fight it had been. Losing in the Eldritch Courts had been bad enough, though he mostly blamed Gabriel for that. But the restraining order, the loss of his best agent, forcing him to get personally involved after the latest Fall...Well, it was more than he was willing to just let slide.

You thought that you could just manipulate the world and see it bow to you, Dusk? We have been doing this for thousands of years, mortal. It is time for you to see what happens when someone that really knows how to play the game gets involved...

It had been easy to tweak the noses of the demons, to set them down paths that they were already considering. The powers of the Vices were easy to understand, and easier still to manipulate. Pride could not stand someone of 'lesser' fiber being above them. Wrath had been pushed to never trust anyone again, too angry to believe that someone else could be someone that didn't need killing. Sloth wanted their reward. Gluttony was hungry for the power that had been denied them by Brutus Diel all these years.

In some ways, God had found it almost too easy to tilt the situation to his advantage. If it were not for the fact that Dusk had become such a thorn in his side, he would almost pull back and allow the cat the chance to strike back. But no, no, this had to be done properly. This threat must be ended.

Now, let's just make sure that the three of you are competent enough to accomplish such a thing...

"Our plans are in place," Darith said, nodding at the Gluttony demon before turning his attention back to the bearess. "You came here to see if there is anything that you can gain for your family. Let me tell you, I can offer you more than you imagine. I can offer you...independence."

God sat up a bit in his chair, cocking his head to the side. That was a step that he hadn't imagined, but then again, the tiger supposed that the lion was in a unique position to offer something like that. If he kept a portion of the Wrath demons for himself, probably those that were willing to stand by Dusk rather than those that were loyal to the plan, and then offered House Judas 'independence' from the Throne of Hell, then he basically bought their loyalty for life. If they were assured that there would be no magically-enforced commands, and yet were still vulnerable as a mini-realm that didn't have the protection of the rest of Wrath...

Yes, very politically sussed, very canny. Something that the Wrath demon was willing to join for, too, considering that she was already leaning in, already talking back.

"That's a prize. What would I have to do?" she asked.

"Your House will keep Dusk isolated when the time comes. Not long, merely a few minutes, long enough for us to do our part."

"Consider it done."

Done? God wasn't even entirely sure what the plan was. Had they settled that out of sight? Perhaps they had; he had offered them a great deal of intelligence through his operatives in Sloth, but that didn't mean that they were going by the plans that he had imagined. He half-considered bringing someone in that would make them go through it, forcing them to talk out the plan before his eyes, but then put that thought to the side. No, that would only cast doubt upon parts of the plan, put them back, and they were not going to have a better opportunity than this. Allies in the realms of Hell were hard to come by, and it would not do to see them split apart due to new questions.

As they lifted glasses to toast to their imminent victory, God indulged himself. The tiger lifted a glass that he conjured at that very moment, filled to the brim with the tears of the faithful, the only 'wine' that he was allowed at the head of the universe. He tilted it back, savoring the salt in it, and smiled to himself as he closed the portal.

"Dusk, I do believe that you mortals call this the calm before the storm," he said, swirling the glass ever so slowly as he looked into it. "Cherish it, mortal. The game is almost done."

And then, this whole mess would be done. The order of things would go back to what it was supposed to be. Armageddon and all those that were worth taking into his arms would be back where they belonged, the world could start over with all those pesky little bits of thought and free will taken out of the equation. There would be no issues such as there had been with the sons of Noah, when the world was repopulated with those that had been, of necessity, smarter than his preference. This time, it would be populated only by those that worshiped him, only by those that saw him as the great power and worthy ruler of the universe that he was.

God drained his glass, thinking of the future, imagining the way that things would be now that they were finally going according to the grand plan again. A day, maybe two, and everything, from the running of Hell to the proper bounds of Purgatory to the world being at ease with itself once more, would be accomplished. They would be back on the road to Armageddon, his son would be found, his daughter would be unleashed - once Dusk was handled, the restraining order was no longer an issue, for that matter - and he...would be proven right.

Lucifer had always left him with that ever so faint question as to his own legitimacy. Someone defying him, even half-successfully, was something that he could not allow. Jesus, likewise, had offered a crack to his certainty of being right, considering that the little bitch had first gone around getting fucked by Lucifer, and then leaving his prison rather than serving his sentence as would have been appropriate.

But no more. No more. Things were fixed now.

They were.

The End

Summary: A little flit around Hell and Heaven to show the other things happening behind the scenes.

Tags: No Sex, Gluttony, Greed, Heaven, Sloth, Tiger, Elephant, Boar, Pig, Bear, Various Species, Demons, Alliances, Politics, Economy, Series, Modern Fantasy,