Infinite Experiences: Soul

Story by KCHemingway on SoFurry

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#2 of Infinite Experiences


Soul

Al Abraq, Umm al Qaywayn, United Arab Emirates, October 24th, 2012

Time: 1434

A female Arabian wolf sat at a table, staring at the phone in her paws. It was just over a year since the Libyan Civil War had ended, but she had a strange feeling that it wouldn't be the last of them. The African continent was fond of them. It seemed that a new one started up barely a week after the preceding one had ended.

She didn't care whether that thought would be considered bigoted. The continent had taken several close friends from her, both directly and indirectly. Her vitriol was justified, at least in her mind, slippery slope or not.

The she-wolf jumped slightly as her phone vibrated and a heartbeat later the screen turned on to show an incoming video call request from her father. Or, more likely, her father, mother, and at least two siblings who would show up a minute or so into the call to be nosy and say hello. She accepted it, and was rewarded in her assumption when she saw her mother and father sharing the screen.

"As-sal?m 'alaykum," the she-wolf said, smiling softly.

"Wa 'alaykum as-sal?m," her father replied. Her mother repeated it.

"It is good to see you again. Both of you," she said, her tail wagging slightly.

"You as well, Aaliyah," her mother said. "Your brothers and sisters miss you, as do we."

"You speak as if I am not but a few minutes away, even at a child's pace," Aaliyah said, her voice light in amusement. "I am not leaving again any time soon. My service ended months ago, and there is no reason that I should leave."

"The fact that you do not come home says otherwise," her father replied, Aaliyah's expression softening sadly. "I understand that you are a grown wolf, Aaliyah, and that you are more than capable of protecting yourself and taking care of yourself. I do not wish to undermine those facts. But you have not come home once since you returned. Not even to visit. You maintain a distance, however short, from us. Clearly there is some reason for it."

"I do not wish to burden you with my reasoning," Aaliyah said softly, her head hanging and gaze resting squarely on the floor. "Just know it has nothing to do with you or my siblings or any of our other family."

"You can talk to us, Aaliyah," her mother said, leaning forward slightly. "We are always here when you need us."

"And I thank you from the bottom of my heart," Aaliyah replied, looking at the screen. She was silent a moment, then took a deep breath and let it out. "How are Asim and Ajmal?"

"Have you not spoken to them?" her mother asked, surprised by the question.

"Not for several weeks," Aaliyah answered sadly. She missed her son deeply. "Asim is not..." She shook her head. "I love him, and I know that he loves me, but he does not understand me. He does not see me beyond a mother. He does not respect me. Perhaps I simply got too used to being respected during my time in the military, but..."

"Aaliyah, you are more than worthy of respect," her father said, his voice sharp and intense. "If Asim does not respect you, that is not your fault."

"Your father is right, Aaliyah," her mother interjected, her expression soft and warm. Aaliyah longed for the days long gone where she could look up from the ground after falling and seeing that same expression on her mother's face. It had been so much simpler, back then. Now she was thirty-seven, her son fourteen, and a husband she had no idea how she felt about. She could not pinpoint the reasoning for this, but she could likely trace it at least to the realization that they were far too opposed ideologically to really make a good pair. That upset her more than it should have, though most of that was likely due to the fact she knew that Ajmal would likely not understand and, due to her being away for a portion of his life, would most probably share a good amount of Asim's views.

Lost in thought, she did not realize several moments had passed until her father spoke her name a little louder than normal, Aaliyah blinking and looking at the phone screen.

"Ba 'tezer begadd," she said, looking towards the door briefly. "I got caught up in my thoughts."

"Are you expecting somebody?" her father asked curiously, obviously having noticed her glance away from the screen.

"Not for a while longer," she answered. "A wolf told me they were looking for somebody capable for a job. They are supposed to arrive in about..." She turned her left wrist over and looked at the watch there. "Forty-five minutes."

"Do you need time to get ready?" her mother asked, clearly looking her head over. Aaliyah smiled softly, chuckling quietly and shaking her head.

"No, 'um," she answered. "I am as tidy as I can get without shaving down to skin. Thank you for asking, though."

"Are you sure? Your cheek ruffs are looking a little long," her mother pointed out, gesturing to her own.

"Mother, I like them this long," Aaliyah replied, chuckling. "Thank you for your concern, however."

"Long cheek ruffs make for good pawholds," her father said cheekily. Her mother gasped dramatically, Aaliyah raising a paw to her muzzle to suppress her laughter. Her father's sense of humor had always been a bit dirtier than her mother's, and Aaliyah wasn't ashamed to admit she had inherited it.

"That is enough from you," her mother said, glaring at Aaliyah's father. "Aaliyah, can you come visit when you have the time? Ahmad wants to see you."

"I will try, mother," she promised, smiling at the older she-wolf. Her eyes widened when a knock came to her door. She tilted her head, humming. "Can I call you back later? I think they are here early."

"Of course, Aaliyah," her mother said, smiling. "Ana ou?ibouk."

"Ou?ibouki," Aaliyah replied. Her father dipped his head, indicating his silent affection, and Aaliyah returned it and ended the call.

Pocketing the phone and standing up, she nudged the seat under the table and walked over to the door. She opened it, blinking in surprise when she found a black fox tod standing there. He smiled.

"Hello there," he said, tilting his head. "It's good to see you again, Aaliyah."

"Daniel," she replied, glancing around. "It is not smart for you to be here. My family is only a few minutes away. My son and husband included."

"I know," he said, still smiling. "Hardly the most dangerous place we've met."

"I have a meeting in forty minutes," she said, shaking her head. "I do not have the time to catch up."

"Oh, with Jonathan, right?" he asked, the she-wolf blinking in shock. "Yeah, I know him. Former Ranger, I believe."

"Battalion?" she asked curiously.

"No, Regiment," Daniel answered. She blinked, surprised. "Yeah, real hardcore."

"How do you know Jonathan?" she asked, leaning against the door frame.

"Same way I know you," he answered, shrugging nonchalantly. The she-wolf tensed up, eyes wide. "What? It ain't like I never told you my inclinations. I deal with wolves who have a thing for foxes, gender be damned."

"It is different to hear it outright," she replied, raising a paw and scratching at her neck. "Um, would you...like to come in? If only for a few minutes?"

"I'd love to," the tod replied, Aaliyah stepping aside and letting him walk in. He sat on the table, staring at her. "So, what's got ya staying in a separate place from your family? Your son, uh...Ajmal, correct?"

She nodded.

"Right, Ajmal. Surely he'd benefit from you not staying in this..." He gestured around with his paw, a clear replacement for some vulgar description. "Beautiful place."

"I appreciate your want to preserve my innocence, but I was a soldier," Aaliyah replied smartly. "You may do away with the pleasantries."

"Oh, thank Christ," Daniel muttered. He stood up, clearing his throat. "I got Jon on dial, you know. Could just...reschedule your little meeting an extra hour out."

"Daniel, we've been over this," she said, her voice tight. "We agreed, when I got married, that we'd cease contact. And yet you remain a constant thorn in my side."

"You always did love my pokes," Daniel said with a smirk, Aaliyah's head jerking back in surprise as a blush warmed her cheeks. "And I see you got your ruffs out again, how they used to be."

"B-because I like them long!" she exclaimed, taking a small step back and turning away from him. It infuriated her how the fox could always put her, a soldier, on the back foot and embarrass her so easily. She was larger, stronger, and more than capable of tearing him apart if she wanted to. So why was she so easily flustered around him? It didn't make sense!

Lost in her thoughts, she didn't notice as Daniel stepped closer to her. She didn't even notice his closeness until she felt a paw tug her cheek fur, gently turning her head towards him.

"When have either of us ever been good at keeping promises?" he asked, sliding his paw under her muzzle and softly pinching a small tuft of fur. He pulled on it, lowering her muzzle, and she felt powerless to stop him. As their muzzles connected she raised her paws, cupping the sides of his head and leaning into it.

She had only herself to blame, really. He'd always had a sway over her, and the only times she'd found herself willing to resist had been when she was a soldier. The rigidity of her schedule had helped her focus and ignore his presence any time she saw him. Now, without it, she was vulnerable. All of her focus was poured into whatever was in front of her, and as it happened, that happened to be Daniel.

She pulled away with a gasp, breathing heavily and looking down at him. Besides that, though, she was silent. She knew this was wrong. By Allah, she knew it was wrong. Despite that, she wanted it. She wanted it desperately. There was a degree of respect from the tod that she appreciated more than anything. He took care of her first, and she found her husband's more traditional method to be severely lacking in comparison.

If Westerners were good for anything, it was their willingness to actually bother to explore their partner. She liked that about Daniel. He didn't just think about himself. It was refreshing, and a great change of pace, but that didn't ease the guilt she'd felt every time.

At least he'd always brought protection with him to ensure nothing resulted of it. That was perhaps one of the only good things about it, if there even were any at all.

She was ashamed that it only took her a few seconds to decide to ignore her worries and inhibitions, stepping forward and capturing Daniel's muzzle in another kiss as she forced him to walk backwards. He seemed all too happy to comply, groaning into the kiss as they passed the table and hit the wall a few heartbeats later.

Her paws slid down, moving under his shirt and running her paws over his chest. The tod pulled his head back, looking around. "Bed?" he asked, Aaliyah nodding in response. She wordlessly gestured towards a somewhat-camouflaged - you had to know it was there to see it, or specifically be looking for it - door. Their muzzles clashed once again as they stumbled towards it, Aaliyah kicking it open and then kicking it shut behind them.

She came to understand something, in the frantic moments of their paws removing the garments the other canid wore. What she'd told her parents during the video call had been a lie, and a damn black one at that. She tried to keep her lies small and white, harmless. But her lie was as far from harmless as a lie could get without putting somebody into physical danger.

Her husband didn't love her, and she did not love him. He was attractive, even if she was inclined towards foxes - black-furred foxes especially - and she would not deny that. But it was pointless to pretend she felt anything for somebody who did not see her as an individual beyond her reproductive capabilities. Who did not respect her or see her as an equal.

As she moved down onto the bed and her pants were shed, her tan legs habitually pressed together. The grey fur around and above her eyes rustled from the breeze of the open window, the even darker fur on her back standing on edge as adrenaline coursed through her. Her tail-tip twitched excitedly, her cream chest rising and falling with each bated, wondrous breath she took. Amber eyes matched the rich, earthy brown of Daniel's. The muscle she'd built up as a soldier rippled under her fur, clearly visible to any who could see her.

The tod's chest was finely toned, like hers, though he was almost as broad. Impressive, for a fox. His arms were thicker, though he couldn't overpower her if she did not let him. And by Allah would she let him.

"I missed this," he said softly, pulling his belt off and pushing his pants down. They fell to the ground with his thigh-hugging underwear, Daniel kicking them off and to the side. He stood before her, exposed, vulnerable. It seemed right that she should respond in kind, letting her legs part slightly to a more relaxed position. It made no difference, in the end, but it was an ingrained reaction to keep her legs pressed together when no clothing covered them. He would shortly be between them, head and hips both, one after the other, dragging sounds from her that her husband only managed when they became tied together.

"I missed you," she responded breathily, the admission bringing no regret or surprise or any other negative reaction from either. Both seemed relieved as the words left her muzzle, and she felt a tightening in her chest as he flashed the same casual smile that had first enraptured her and her curiosity, almost two decades ago.

"I can tell," the tod said softly, stepping closer and resting a paw on her chest. He gently pushed her back, following her down and hovering over her. Their muzzles met again, softer this time. Less hungry, less desperate. Hope filled her at the tenderness he displayed, and as the kiss broke their gazes met. Both of them stared warmly at the other, both raising a paw and gently cupping the other's cheek.

They communicated silently, words exchanged only in the way they looked at each other and caressed the other's cheek. Something bubbled up in that moment, something that would follow the both of them for the rest of their lives. Whatever happened in the following seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years to come...nothing would shake what they found in that moment.

Aaliyah let out a soft gasp, her eyes brimming, and they both pressed their muzzles together once again as they cemented that silent communication. She became aware of something else, in those precious moments, that only strengthened her. Daniel had always seen that she was taken care of when they spent time together, and she was always grateful and eager, deep down, for the next time they would meet. But those moments, those wasteful, dry moments of lust...they could not compare to the experience they were both undergoing.

It was not his skill and experience that pushed her over that mind-numbing, breath-stealing edge. Nor was it the brush of sensitive flesh against sensitive flesh when he would move the both of them together each time he teased that final push. It wasn't each time his teeth would nip and nibble at her neck, making her back arch and her muzzle part as she tried to keep her cries quiet, only for his ears. It wasn't the sudden feeling of him introducing her to a new way to kiss, his tongue meeting hers and easily wrestling it into submission that had her melting against him.

What pushed her past simple whimpers and the occasional gasp into a full howl - muffled quite well by Daniel's muzzle - was the simple fact that for the first time, she was not simply staving off a primal desire or submitting to her husband because it was expected of her. She was experiencing it as it was meant to be experienced. Two souls, giving over to the other everything. It was trust, but it was not trust in the usual sense. The trust that was conveyed between two mammals when they gave themselves over to the other was so much more than that.

Above all else, it was a promise. Not that they would be there when the other awoke, that was a guarantee. It was a promise that they were staying, that they would follow the other beyond any border that tried to separate them.

In the moment that he gave that final push, she understood fully the concept that was so deeply ingrained into fox culture that they believed it true for everyone. She completely and fully understood what a soul mate was, and what it felt like when you found yours. It was nothing to brush aside, to ignore and pretend it was some concept for foxes and foxes alone. Everyone had their soulmate, but it was not always the most likely candidate. In fact, never in a million years would Aaliyah have assumed who hers would be.

It was not surprising, in the moment, but to say it was unexpected was an understatement. She would never have assumed that Daniel, of all of Allah's creations, would be the one she was destined for. She'd known since she was fifteen that she was more attracted to foxes than wolves, but she'd always believed it would remain a preference and never have any substance or become something she would find herself able to act on.

The two of them lay there, silent save for their breathing, for several minutes. Finally, Daniel raised his head and looked at her. She met his gaze, her expression soft and warm.

"Do you, um...maybe wanna...come with me?" the tod asked softly, making her blink in surprise. "W-when I leave, I mean."

"To where?" she questioned, tilting her head in confusion.

He chuckled, though he seemed equally confused by her question. "Where else?" he asked, tilting his head ever so slightly. "My place, in America."

She blinked, eyes widening slightly in surprise. "Daniel, I..." Her expression shifted, the she-wolf averting her gaze. "I cannot abandon my family."

"Yeah, I figured you'd say that," he said, laying his head down on her chest. He let out a sad exhale. "All the times we had sex, and only now does the dam break."

"Sorry?" Aaliyah said, not understanding what he meant.

"Aaliyah, foxes know when we meet our soulmate," Daniel said, chuckling softly. "It's not some revelation that occurs during sex. We feel it that first time our eyes meet. It's like fire, and ice, and lightning, and razor shards. Everything that hurts, but...it's different. It burns, by whatever god you want to claim, it burns, but there's no pain. It feels like you've been drowning all of your life, and you've come up for air for the first time. Every moment together burns. And every moment away burns, and this time there is pain. And you continue on anyway because you know that every time you're together makes it all go away."

Aaliyah's eyes widened as she understood what he was saying. "You knew," she whispered, muzzle parting slightly. "You knew we were soulmates."

"I knew that you were mine, yes," the tod answered. "And I suspected that maybe, just maybe, I might be yours. But you never expressed anything beyond the same need and lust, and then you'd be gone, so I ignored it and continued about my life. I had no reason to suspect our lives were entwined beyond some cruel twist of fate."

"Daniel, I'm so sorry," she said, paws cupping his head. "I should have realized sooner. I don't know why I didn't."

"It's not your fault," the fox replied, his expression soft and warm. "Anything that isn't a fox has a hard time realizing when they've found a soulmate."

Aaliyah nodded slowly, closing her eyes for a moment. "I will need to talk to my family," she said. "Ajmal especially. And Asim will be difficult to convince that divorce would be the best course of action."

"I'll come with you," Daniel said, Aaliyah's eyes widening in worry.

"Are...are you sure that is wise?" she asked, the tod chuckling softly and playfully rolling his eyes.

"Aaliyah, relax," he said. He was clearly far less worried than she was. "We have a history as friends. I'll introduce myself as a friend. Nobody is going to know, I give you my word."

The she-wolf remained silent, staring at him for a long moment before sighing. He had her trust. "Alright," she conceded, laying her head back. "Just...don't speak unless you're addressed, please."

"Oh, so I'm gonna be you during your early days in basic," he commented, smirking playfully. Aaliyah slowly raised her head, simply glaring at him in a way that got her message across quite clearly. "Right, sorry."

"I'm sure," she replied dryly, laying her head back down and letting out a harsh exhale that quite plainly conveyed the 'this is going to be a long forty minutes' she was thinking. Daniel hummed, then kissed her chest and lowered his head down into a comfortable spot. Incidentally, that happened to place his head in prime position to hear her heartbeat. A smile touched his muzzle.

"Listen at that," he said to himself, letting out a soft laugh. "That's real strong. A soldier's heart."

"Please do not speak of my heartbeat as if you are listening to a fetus'," Aaliyah said, though she couldn't help but chuckle. "One child is enough."

"Says the she-wolf with an irrational hatred of odd numbers," Daniel replied, both of them letting out a chuckle that transformed into actual laughter not much later. She conceded the point with silence, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly before repeating the action again and again. David made his appreciation known with a gentle push of his hips.

The forty-odd minutes came and went faster than expected, and though the tod had deflated, neither of them moved. They were content to lay there a moment longer, basking in the warmth of the other. They expressed their affection with simple glances and nudges. No words, just body language.

Their peace was broken by the sound of a knock at the door to the building. Aaliyah's eyes widened, both quickly sitting up and exchanging glances before getting dressed as quickly as they could. Daniel clamped his jaws shut to muffle a yelp as the zipper on his pants caught his underwear and - to Aaliyah's pity - his sheath. He quickly recovered and zipped them up properly, then tugged his shirt on and smoothed it down. Aaliyah exited first, making sure nobody was in the room beyond, then signalled him to exit. He quickly made his way towards the window overlooking the street, leaning against the windowsill.

Opening the door, Aaliyah was not surprised to see the wolf she had been expecting, Jonathan White. What she was not expecting, however, was her husband and son to be standing beside him.

"Uh, hello," she said, looking between the three of them curiously. "Jonathan, I was not under the impression our interview would be a family event."

"Apologies, Aaliyah, these two joined me while I was waiting for our agreed-upon time for meeting," Jonathan said, gesturing to Asim and Ajmal.

"Those would be my husband, Asim, and my son, Ajmal," Aaliyah replied. "Who last I remember, had no interest in visiting."

"Ajmal wanted to see you," Asim said, his expression indicating he did not share the desire with the younger wolf. "He was determined not to let me rest my eyes until I agreed."

"I wonder where he gets that from," she replied, tilting her head every so slightly in a clearly sarcastic, somewhat demeaning manor. Asim narrowed his eyes, but did not growl like she had expected him to. He did not handle sarcasm or rebuttal well, least of all from her. Aaliyah moved her gaze from him and down to her son, her expression softening. "Wakayf halik ya bani?"

"I am fine, mother," Ajmal answered, his gaze averted from her just enough to be noticeable. Aaliyah sighed softly, then turned and flicked her tail for them to enter. She heard the door shut a few seconds later, sitting down at the table. Daniel was still leaning against the windowsill, though he had since turned and was facing everyone else.

"Hey, Jonathan," he said, raising a paw in greeting. Asim glanced over at him, then looked at Aaliyah with a low growl and narrowed eyes.

"Why is he here?" he asked, looking between both of them. "Why are you two alone!?"

"Please," Aaliyah scoffed, rolling her eyes. "As if he would even dare try anything. He knows he wouldn't stand a chance against me."

"It's true," Daniel said, chuckling. "Besides, we're old friends who haven't seen each other in a while. There's nothing wrong with us meeting to catch up."

"Then do so in a public place!" Asim snapped, Aaliyah standing up fast enough to send her chair falling backwards, paws on the table.

"That is enough!" she shouted, and she actually felt a sense of pride when Asim shrank back from her. The she-wolf ignored it. "You want us to meet publicly? Why? So one of your friends you keep having post up across the street and follow me whenever I leave can tell you I'm cheating on you without even bothering to figure out if that's the truth!? Sit down and shut! Up! Both of you!"

"Y-yes ma'am. Er, sir," Daniel said, his eyes wide and voice almost sounding like a kit's from fear. Asim was also clearly scared by her outburst, but he was trying so hard to suppress it. Ajmal stared at her with wide eyes, though they held no fear. If anything, he almost looked impressed. That look made her feel warm. Maybe there was a chance to save him yet.

Aaliyah huffed and retrieved her fallen chair, standing it up and sitting down. Her gaze met Jonathan's, the timber wolf's expression surprisingly relaxed and unbothered.

"I suppose we can get to the business at paw?" he questioned with a chuckle, glancing around. Asim had lowered his gaze to the floor, looking for all the world like a kit caught trying to get into the proverbial cookie jar.

"Yes," Aaliyah answered, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. "Apologies for my outburst."

"I've seen worse," the timber wolf replied, smiling in amusement. Aaliyah couldn't help but do the same. "Now, I know I've been rather tight-lipped during our brief conversations over the phone and email in regards to what I'm approaching you for, and I apologize for that, but I'm afraid that it's a necessity. I'm starting up a private security contracting organization, and your record during the Libyan Civil War caught my interest. You excelled at the close quarters combat part of training during basic, able to take down wolves who were larger and stronger than you without resorting to dirty tricks simply by overwhelming them to the point they couldn't defend themselves. That sound right so far?"

"It does," Aaliyah answered, dipping her head. "Although I could never build up the stamina the others could."

"Yes, you tended to lose sparring sessions that lasted past a minute. Which is still far better than the average citizen could hope for in such a high intensity fight, mind you, but your fellow trainees lasted longer because they paced themselves. You sought to end things as quickly as possibly by putting them through so much pain in a short time that they couldn't focus, including trying to hit their arms in order to force them to lose feeling for a short time and using that advantage to go for their head. Very impressive." Jonathan hummed softly, then said, "I could use somebody with your skills in my organization."

"Does it have a name?" Aaliyah asked, tilting her head as she leaned forward. "A base of operations? A roster? Backers?"

"It's called the Wolf Pack, and is going to be made up exclusively of wolves," Jonathan answered. "The pack hierarchy in ferals isn't quite the same that humans think it is in reality, but we'll be keeping the same general idea. Leader, second in command, and followers. No bottom rungs, though. The roster is still being built, we're still approaching the initial candidates and getting answers from them. Most are former military, though we're open to civilian candidates if they catch our interest."

"Mil-Spec gear?" Aaliyah asked, crossing her arms. "Firearms, armor, munitions, all of it."

"Mostly," Jonathan answered, nodding his head. "Firearms, armor, munitions, and rigs are all Mil-Spec, but clothing and vehicles are whatever we can get. Once we have funds we'll upgrade to Mil-Spec clothing and vehicles to the best of our ability, but until then we're making do."

Aaliyah hummed. "Mil-Spec equipment is expensive," she conceded, scratching at her neck. "Especially for a civilian organization, private security or not."

"Uh, what does Mil-Spec mean?" Ajmal asked, looking between the both of them.

Daniel answered, "Military specification," before Aaliyah could, the she-wolf glancing towards him. "Basically, their equipment will be the same as what the actual militaries use. Materials, dimensions, all the way down to part testing. It has to be approved by a government inspector in order to go out to whoever is going to be using it."

"Will it be American Mil-Spec?" Aaliyah questioned, Jonathan's ear twitching at the question. "I imagine so, seeing as it will likely be based in America and operating from there." She was glad that he seemed to have caught her silent agreement. Unfortunately, it seemed everyone else did as well

"Y-you cannot go to America!" Asim exclaimed, and Aaliyah was at the very least pleased it was said with surprise more than as a command. "You have a family here! A duty!"

"I missed out on a not-insignificant portion of Ajmal's life," Aaliyah replied calmly. She met Asim's gaze. "I know we do not see eye to eye on most things. And we both know that this marriage was never going to end with both of us going into old age together. But I trust you to take care of him."

"D-don't I get a say in this!?" Ajmal asked, and it surprised Aaliyah how upset he seemed. Her expression softened, the she-wolf standing and walking around the table. She kneeled in front of him, a paw coming up to his cheek.

"Oh, my son, I am sorry," she said, leaning forward and pressing her forehead to his. "But I cannot stay. This country is not good for me. Your father, as much as I trust him to care for you, is not good for me. We are simply too different."

Asim lowered his gaze as Aaliyah looked towards him. She was surprised to see he looked ashamed, and she was even more surprised to realize she felt a twinge of regret upon seeing his reaction.

"Will I still see you?" Ajmal asked, his voice hitching.

"I am sure we can talk over video calls," Aaliyah answered, stroking his cheek comfortingly. "It goes without saying, but I will miss you." She let out a sad, almost nervous chuckle. "You are a bright light in my darkness, and nothing will change that. You are my world, and I would do anything to keep you safe. But if I do not leave I will burn out before my time. I would rather us be separate but alive and in touch than together for a handful of years longer but doomed to part before we are ready."

"I understand," the younger wolf said, sniffing and wiping at his nose.

"No," Aaliyah replied softly, shaking her head faintly. "But you will. I know not when, but you will one day understand."

"Aaliyah," Asim said suddenly, the she-wolf turning to find him standing right beside her. She stood, meeting his gaze. He averted his gaze after a moment. "May I talk to you in private? For just a moment?"

She blinked, and it took her a moment to recover. Aaliyah turned, looking at Daniel. "Will you take Ajmal and Jonathan outside, please?"

"Of course," he answered, standing up and moving towards her son. He lowered himself down, smiling at the young wolf. "Come on. I'll show you something to impress your classmates with."

"Okay," Ajmal replied, standing up and walking towards the door. Jonathan was already standing there, opening it as they approached. Daniel let him exit before him, the tod turning to look back at Aaliyah and dipping his head. Aaliyah returned it, Daniel stepping outside and shutting the door behind him.

Both Aaliyah and Asim stood in silence for a long moment, Aaliyah eventually shuffling towards the table and sitting on the edge of it. Asim cleared his throat. "You care for the fox," he said, Aaliyah blinking in surprise. Her initial reaction was to deny it, but before she could start, she froze. Hanging her head, she simply nodded. "Did you sleep with him?'

"Long ago," she answered softly. "Before we met, let alone were married. I was young, and...impressionable. My parents have always been on the progressive side. I was so scared that I had to force myself to tell them because I knew keeping it from them would only end badly for all of us. I expected...something. But not for them to just laugh it off."

Asim chuckled, and Aaliyah felt another twinge of regret. She had never seen this side of him. Was it possible what she had seen had been some sort of projection?

"That sounds like them," he said, looking down at the floor. "But that is not what I meant." Aaliyah did not answer, but she might as well have. He nodded, turning away from her and taking a deep breath. "I should be angry, should I not?"

"You have the right to be," Aaliyah answered, closing her eyes. "As awful as we were together, and as awful as you could be to me, that does not excuse committing adultery."

"Perhaps, perhaps not," Asim replied, turning to look at her. She let out a tiny, quiet gasp when she saw his eyes were wet. "I am sorry for the way I treated you. I was not the husband you wanted, and I was definitely not the husband you deserved. I took everything out on you, even when you had no part in it."

"Stop it," Aaliya said, swallowing the building lump in her throat. Asim blinked, caught off guard. "If you keep apologizing like this, I will have to forgive you."

"I do not deserve it," the wolf replied, approaching her slowly. She looked up at him, surprised when he pulled her into a hug. His head rested on top of hers, his body giving off light shudders that she recognized as those that happened when one was forcing themselves not to let their emotions spill over.

Aaliyah was dumbfounded. She had built up such an angry, brutish image of him in her mind that the realization she had only seen one side of him left her confused and unsure of how to proceed. Should she change her mind, give him another chance?

No, that would only end badly for her, him, and their son. Even with this sudden, new side of him being presented to her, she could never forget everything she had suffered through at his paw. And she had swallowed her pride and taken it, because she'd never been sure he would not react by taking it out on Ajmal. Now, though, she felt ashamed at thinking he might have done something like that. He was a product of his environment and upbringing, the same as her.

"I can not forgive you," she said softly. "But I can move past it."

"You are too generous," Asim said, chuckling softly as he pulled back. He leaned down, planting a kiss between her ears, then pulled back. She did not mind, to her surprise. It was not the worst thing he could have done.

"I am trusting you to keep Ajmal safe," she said, Asim meeting her gaze. He nodded in understanding. "Let something good come of what happened between us. Please."

"I'll make you proud," he said. "You and your parents."

"Do not worry about making me proud," she replied, smiling comfortingly. "Just make sure he comes out better than both of us."

"I do not think it is possible for him to be better than you," Asim replied, chuckling softly. "I do not think anybody can be."

"The kits of today are our future," she said, glancing towards the door. "It is our duty to make sure they are ready to make it better than we ever could."

"I will do my best," her husband said, dipping his head. A smile touched both their muzzles. "That is all I wanted to say."

"I almost feel bad now, seeing this side of you," she admitted, her smile turning sad. "But I can't change my mind."

"I know," Asim said, gesturing towards the door with his paw. "I...I'm going to go home. Ajmal can stay with you for the rest of day. You're welcome to stay a bit when you bring him back."

"I'll think about it," the she-wolf replied, Asim dipping his head in farewell and walking towards the door. She watched him open the door, step out, and only vaguely heard him talking to their son before the door shut. After a few moments it opened back up and Daniel and Ajmal walked back in. "Did you show him your trick, Daniel?"

"He did," Ajmal answered, nodding. She smiled and walked over to him, kneeling down to his height.

"Well, why don't you show it to me, yeah?" she asked, his face lighting up at the idea. She chuckled, moving to her seat and sliding it closer to his. She was content to enjoy the rest of the day with the two mammals she loved, even if her son didn't know about her and Daniel. She would worry about everything else later.

***

Somewhere Outside Langley, Virginia, July 12th, 2018

Time: 1445

Aaliyah sat on a single mammal bed, laptop in her lap with a video chatting app pulled up. The cursor hovered over the call button for her son's contact page, the she-wolf swallowing the lump in her throat. She tapped the tracking pad with a finger, the screen changing and showing an outgoing call. She took a deep breath, flattening the fur on her face.

The screen changed suddenly, Ajmal's face appearing. A wide smile was on his muzzle.

"Hey, mom!" he exclaimed excitedly. "I have somebody I want you to meet." He shifted to the side, a female jackal appearing.

"Hi, Miss Farid," she said nervously, raising a paw and waving. Aaliyah hummed softly.

"Might I assume that you and Ajmal are dating?" she questioned, tilting her head with a faint smile. The jackal let out a nervous laugh.

"This is Iesha," Ajmal said, appearing back on the screen. "She's a year above me in school."

"Iesha, it's good to meet you," Aaliyah said, still smiling. "Ajmal, how is your father?"

"He's...good," the younger wolf said hesitantly. "Been talking to another she-wolf these last few weeks."

"That's good," Aaliyah said, perking up at the news. "He deserves to be happy."

"Yeah," Ajmal said softly, averting his gaze. "How is...Daniel?"

"Daniel's fine," she answered, her tone neutral. She'd finally worked up the courage to tell him about her and the tod three months ago, and suffice to say things had been awkward since then. She decided not to tell him the tod had proposed.

"That's great," Ajmal replied, Iesha making a 'well this is awkward' face before clearing her throat.

"Miss Farid, I noticed your clothes seem to be a bit...militaristic," she said, Aaliyah looking down in surprise. She was, indeed, clad in a black Crye Precision shirt with matching pants, but what the jackal had undoubtedly noticed most was the top of her plate carrier and the shoulder straps of her rig.

Aaliyah hummed, but before she could respond, the door opened and a male Arabic wolf walked in. "Hey, Al, Jon said we go out in five," he said, freezing as he noticed the laptop. "Ah, sorry. I'll tell him you're busy."

"No need, Achmed," she said as she glanced towards him, sighing softly as she turned her gaze back to the computer screen. "Ajmal, Iesha, I have to go. Work is calling. I'll call you back when it is over, alright?"

"Where are you going?" Ajmal asked, worry clear in his voice.

"Just a little up north," she answered. "A simple meeting between our outfit and another, I promise. The trip there and back will probably take longer than the actual meeting."

"Why are you meeting, if I may ask?" Iesha questioned, Aaliyah blinking in surprise. She glanced towards Achmed, who stood by the door waiting for her.

"We are...discussing private business between our outfits," she answered. "Nothing major."

"Alright," Iesha said, nodding. "It was lovely meeting you, Miss Farid."

"You as well, Iesha," Aaliyah said. "Ajmal."

"Yes, mother?" her son questioned, tilting his head.

She smiled and said, "I love you, my son." The wolf chuckled.

"Love you too, mother," he said, and a moment later the call ended.

Aaliyah sighed, shutting the laptop and looking at Achmed. "I hate lying," she said. "Especially to my son."

"I know," he replied, jerking his head in a 'come on' gesture.

She grumbled and set the laptop on the desk a few feet away from the bed, then walked out the door with a muttered, "Fucking Operators."