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Dad comes out naked and gets in the spa with us. "Hikari, Akira is mad, and he is not happy with you" Dad says laughing. "He feels he should have been consulted first, before you set them up" Dad says laughing. "Dad, Botan is of age, as I am, Uncle Akira has no right to be angry" I say angrily. Dad laughs. "I told you he would be difficult" Dad says laughing. "He is angry also as he had always hoped you and Botan would bond" Dad says. "Botan and I have told him we are good friends and not in love with one another" I say angrily.. "Akira is one who will not hear what he does not wish to hear at times." Dad says laughing. "No wonder you once said, Poor Botan, Dad" I say softly. "I have another reason now to be glad you are my beloved father" I say kissing Dad. Dad smiles. "You have been a good son, and easy to understand" Dad says smiling at me. "I have tried father, to be myself, which is what you always taught me I should be" I say kissing him again.

Juzo walks out, and he looks pale. "Masters, Mr Akagane is here and he is berating poor Master Botan and his Lion" Juzo says. I get up out of the spa and I am royally pissed. "What will you do, my son?" Dad asks. "I think it is time to make Uncle Akira see that which he does not wish to see" I say firmly. "Botan is an adult, and he had found love, and I will not have even Uncle Akira interfere" I snap. Daichi laughs. "I wouldn't want to face Hikari when he gets that look, my love" he says kissing Takeru. Dad laughs. "No, my son is most fierce when he appears calm yet is angry" Dad says smiling. "I will come in a bit, my son, go do what you know you must" Dad says kissing me.

I decide to go in naked and wet. It'll throw Uncle Akira off a bit, Uncle Akira is envious of how hung I am, and he'll be easier to deal with if he's off balance. I stride into the house, and walk purposefully in to the living room where I can hear Uncle shouting at poor Botan. Akira is shouting and cursing at poor Keiji, and he's terrified. Botan has a tight grip on Keiji and will not let go of him. Botan looks cowed by his father's wrath.

"Uncle Akira, enough" I shout as loud as I can. He turns to me, and his face is contorted in rage. "You cannot know what he has done, he has shamed me and our family" Akira roars. "Know, I do know, I set them up, Uncle Akira, Keiji is perfect for Botan" I say firmly. Akira is looking at me quite darkly. "Why did you not take my son yourself as I had hoped you would one day?" he roars at me. "I am not in love with him, I do love him, he is quite a wonderful Boar, and I love having him in my life, but to our joint sadness Botan and I were not meant to be together" I say sharply. "All of your bluster and hoping will not make it so, Botan is meant for Keiji, in fact, they have bonded, Uncle Akira" I say emphatically. Botan and Keiji look relieved and grateful. "Uncle, if you cannot accept their love then you will lose your son, he loves his Lion, and he is happy, and there is not a single thing you can do to change that" I say firmly. "I will cut off his money" Akira roars. "I do not care, father, I will live on my teacher's salary and what Keiji makes from his store" Botan says getting angry now. "You won't even be able to afford a place to live" Akira roars. "And you can be on the streets, and I still will not take you in" he says shaking with rage. "We did, and Botan and Keiji are quite welcome here" I say firmly. Akira gives me the nastiest look I have ever received. "Your father will not allow this' he roars at me. "On the contrary, Akira, I have already formally invited them to stay, Keiji is a good Lion and he loves Botan very much." Dad says smiling. "They love one another, Uncle Akira, I love Botan in my way, as he loves me, and I wanted him to have who and what he wanted in a mate, and Keiji is it, and he will love Botan as long as he lives" I say firmly.

"I will disown you, Botan, you will be my son no more" Akira roars. "Father, I would not want you to do that, but I am not swayed, I am not as my brothers, I have my own life away from the family business, and I have my own life, and my own love" Botan says sharply. "I will legally bond Keiji, and be Mr Matsumori" Botan says smiling. Akira looks horrified. "Botan is stronger willed than you give him credit for Akira, he will defy you for the sake of his love" Dad says smiling.

"You cannot be in favor of this Dr Suzakawa?" Akira asks. "I am" I say smiling. "No, Dr Suzakawa" Akira says. "My son is also Dr Suzakawa, he is a licensed Psychiatrist now, Akira" Dad says proudly. Akira looks at me now. "You would not do as Botan has done to me, to your own father, Hikari." he snaps at me. Dad laughs. "Hikari has his own love now, and it is more complicated than Botan and Keiji, but I do approve, I have no wish to run my son's life, I brought him up well, and he has always made me proud of him" Dad says smiling. "All you can do is raise them right and trust them to be who they are, Akira" Dad says. "Botan found his own way, amidst disapproval and discouragement, and made his own life, just like a certain young Boar I am close to, who bucked all to start a small company of his own with no money or resources, and made it a success" Dad says smiling. "Botan is your son, strong willed enough to know what he wanted and go for it, and to try to be happy" Dad says softly. Botan is smiling now. He whispers to me that he never knew how much Dad thought of him. Akira is silent now.

"Come, Botan, Keiji, let us let our fathers continue to discuss this" I say softly. And we walk out to the patio. "You are completely unfazed by being naked while arguing with Dad" Botan says softly. "I went in naked to catch him off guard, your Dad is not gay, but he has seen me naked in the past and is a bit envious of how I am equipped" I say laughing. Botan cracks up. Keiji still looks worried.

"Keiji, are you OK?" I ask."I am sorry to have caused all of this arguing, maybe I should just go away" he says looking at the ground. "Do not even tease about that, my love" Botan says grabbing him. "I could not live without you, now that I have you, and I know how much you love me" Botan says almost begging Keiji. "Please don't ever leave me, Keiji?" Botan begs him. Keiji breaks down. "I was scared, Botan, I did not know if he would force you away from me, and I would be devastated yet again." he says sadly. "I will never leave you, I swore I would never hurt you, and I would be with you as long as I drew breath" Botan says softly.

They hug tightly. "Botan, let us get dressed, and we will go get your things, and Keiji's things and move you guys in" I say softly. "Uncle Akira needs to see we are serious here" I say sharply.

"First, I would thank you, my Hikari" Botan says hugging me tightly and kissing me. "I would thank you as well, Hikari" Keiji says. "You stood up to him for us without blinking, and gave me the courage to stand up to him myself" Botan says softly. "I knew I had my own father behind me, Dad wants you two together as well, and he let me know he would back me up as I needed him to, and I love you both, and want you to be together for life" I say hugging and kissing them both. I run and dress, and we go to Botan's rooms and get all of his things, and they barely fill my trunk. Keiji takes his clothes and leaves a lot since he'll need it when he runs his store below his room. We go back to the house and move them into their room

Dad and Uncle Akira are sitting talking calmly in our living room. Akira glares at me as I walk through the room. I turn and I look at him unflinchingly. "Is there still a problem, Uncle Akira?" I ask sharply. "I want to know why you would not take Botan, you care, you seem to love him, but is he not good enough for you" Akira snaps. "I love Botan, true" I say softly. "He loves me as well, but we are not in love, we have much to care for one another about, and I love having him around me, but we are not for each other, I have a love of my own I will collect soon, when he is healed." I say sharply. "I always prayed you'd take my boy one day, one of the few males I knew to be worthy of him" Akira says. "I will tell you, Uncle Akira, Botan and I both are sad we could not bond, but he has his love now, and I have mine, and yet we want to keep each other close." I say softly. "I would add that out of all I have dated, Botan is the only one besides my Dr Ryouta that I tried to bond." I say softly. "But we were not meant to be, Uncle Akira" I say sadly. "I see" he says softly.

"I do not think your Dr Ryouta is worthy of you, Hikari" Akira says sharply. "After what Takeru told me I am amazed he is allowing the two of you to be together" Uncle says sounding hurt. "He is noble, and he tried hard to forget me, and stay with his family, and when they left he fell apart, and we will be together soon" I say softly. "You cannot run your son's life, you have to trust them at some point, Akira" Dad says softly. "I have known Kenichi for a long time, and I knew him to be a Horse of great integrity, and he has suffered for his love of my son, and he will be happy now, Hikari will love him, and in return Kenichi will love him forever" Dad says softly.

"I remember from college that Kenichi Ryouta was reputed to be massively hung" Akira says smiling. "He is, but so am I " I say calmly. "My Clydesdale is 24 1/2" long and 5" in circumference." I tell him smiling. "I am only 20" long and 4" in circumference" I say softly. Akira looks stunned. "My son has nothing to be ashamed of" Dad says proudly. " Neither does my Oto-Sama" I say leaning over to kiss Dad. "Botan as well, he is 11" long and 5" in circumference, as thick as my Kenichi" I say proudly. Akira grabs the sake bottle off of the side table and swigs it. "I did not wish to know of my son's size" he says shakily. "More than just sheer size, Botan is a sweet, gentle and tender lover, and an extremely good one" I say smiling. "Did he get that from you, Uncle Akira?" I ask. He's very embarrassed now. "Son, do not upset Uncle Akira, you know he is not wishing to know these things" Dad says laughing.

"I am not gay, but I have had few complaints from women, Hikari" Uncle Akira says softly. "Good is good, no matter which sex you fuck" I tease him. Akira smiles. "True enough, and a part of me is proud to know my son is both hung and a good lover" Akira says softly. "I have seen you in the showers, Takeru, and today seeing Hikari, how do you deal with the fact that your son is so massively hung and you are not?" Akira asks. "My Grizzly son is bigger than me overall, but his heart and soul are as mine and he is my son in all of the ways he can be, and I have always been so proud of him" Dad says kissing me. "Just as I have always been proud to be the son of Dr Takeru Suzakawa" I say proudly. "Botan is more like you than you can see, Akira" Dad says. "He is a son that any father would be proud of" Dad says softly. "I am, I do not know his mind, but he is stronger willed, and more independent than I had given him credit for being" Uncle Akira says proudly. I laugh. "Botan's sweet nature covers a will of iron, he is your son after all, Uncle Akira" I say smiling.

My cell rings, and it's Kenichi, so I run to my bedroom and take the call. "My love, I will be allowed to make a short call to you each night about now" he says happily. "I am so glad, I miss you, we hadn't been with each other for so long, but I miss you, Kenichi, more than I could ever have dreamed, my love" I say happily. "I swear, once we are together, we will never be separated again for long." he says earnestly. "I dreamed about you last night" he says softly. "I hope it was a good one" I say smiling. "I dreamt we were together, and on vacation" Kenichi says. "I woke up so happy, my Grizzly" he says joyously. "I had a busy day, baby, but I'll tell you about it next weekend, I helped a good friend of mine get bonded, and he and his mate are living with us all now" I say happily. "I am your baby?" he asks. "You are, my love" I say softly. "I love you, and I am sorry, I get on the phone with you, and all I can think of is how much I love you and have missed you for so long" Kenichi says softly. "I can understand, you went through Hell for so long, and now you are on the verge of us being together, and it's not easy for you to think of anything else" I say happily.

"I just hope I don't break down when I finally get you back into my arms, after what, three or more years" Kenichi says. "You can cry, it's more than understandable" I tell him. "I may weep a bit myself, to have you for good finally" I say softly "I should know you'd understand" he says softly. "I am more than ready to have you again, and to have you as mine for good, my Clydesdale" I say happily.

"Will you let me take you as soon as we can, I will let you fuck me, but I am burning to be inside of you again" Kenichi says. "Of course, you are to be my Lord and Master" I say softly. He cries. "You meant it, you want me to be..." he says and his tears choke him up. "I swore I'd let you be my husband and I will, I am going to bond you as soon as I can, maybe even during the conjugal visit if I can, and I will legally bond you, and become yours fully." I say softly. "You'd become Dr Hikari Ryouta?" he asks choking up. "I can't think of anything I want more, other than you at my side right now" I say happily. "We'd have to wait six months after we bond" he says calmly. "I will wait, you have waited longer for me, I can wait that long to belong to my Horse totally" I say softly. He cries. "I have to go, my love, I'll call you tomorrow night" he says sadly. "I will happily await you to call" I say softly. He hangs up. And I know it's going to be a long time until next weekend.

I go out to the living room. Uncle Akira has gone home, and Botan and Keiji are necking on the couch in front of the TV, and Dad and Daichi have gone to bed already. I sit by the lovebirds and I watch TV. I feel a bit sad, knowing I'd be curled up with Kenichi like that if I could. I get up and go to the kitchen for a diet soda, and I go into my bedroom and watch my own TV for a while. I don't have my first appointment until 10AM but I have no reason to stay up late. So I go to sleep. And I dream of my Horse. And I wake about 4AM crying and feeling very lonely. I haven't slept alone much, between dating and Dad and Daichi or Botan. I can't even call my Kenichi, and ease the pain. And I begin to see how he felt for so long. He loved me, but was with his wife, and never able to call me even, as he did not want to leave her and hurt his colts. I wonder how many nights he felt just like this, lonely, missing me, unable to call me or get comfort from anyone.

I had no idea of how lonely he must have been. No wonder he broke down, after drinking to hide his pain, and even then it didn't stop it. And I am ashamed that I never went after him now. I should have just said the hell with it, and gone for him. I get up and go to the bathroom. And lay back down. And I can't go to sleep again. It's too late to take any Valium, as I won't get up in time. I drag myself out of bed. And I try to figure out why I cannot sleep. And I start wondering again how many nights Kenichi didn't sleep from missing me, and feeling trapped and lonely. I haven't been lonely much, but I am feeling alone now. And I can't date or do much. I have to cope, I have to get through this until I have my Clydesdale with me. I am the only one alone here. Dad and Daichi, Botan and Keiji, and even Juzo has his Aoki. Our Lion retainer has his Wolf handyman lover. And they've been together for 20 years and are more in love than in their beginning. They're enough to give you faith in the strength of true love.

I have to stay occupied. So I get my laptop out and I work on my CE credits for this year. And I get busy and soon it's almost time for me to get up. So I stop and I go shower and go to see if the coffee is ready yet. Juzo hands me a cup when I walk into the kitchen. I sit at the kitchen table. "My Grizzly son is lonely" he says softly. I nod. He nuzzles me. "It never bothered you to be the only single animal in the house until last night" he says gently. "I miss Kenichi, even though I didn't really have him before" I say shaking my head. "You are anxious, young Grizzly, you know he is yours, and he is not with you, no matter that he hasn't been with you, you want him with you, and that hurts you" He says nuzzling me. "Will it be like this until he gets out and I can bring him home?" I ask a bit frightened. "No, you will get calm and adjust to waiting, young Grizzly master" Juzo says softly.

"I had to wait for six months for my Aoki to come here from the country, and I was just as lonely, though we had bonded but not lived together" Juzo says softly. "The nights took forever, and fortunately for me, once I was hired here. you were born, and I had to help with you all hours of the day and night" Juzo says kissing me. "You were such a good, and well behaved cub, even as a newborn" Juzo says softly. "But you had a huge appetite, and you would not go more than two hours without being fed." Juzo says laughing. "None of us got a lot of sleep until you were weaned off of the formula, but you were quick to wean, and you never were fussy about food" he says smiling.

"Juzo, what do I do?" I ask. "You endure, Master Hikari" he says. "It'll be good for you, you've always had things pretty much your own way, except when your father got in your way by wanting his way" Juzo says smiling. "I feel awful, I know now how he must have felt. lonely, and hurting, even with his loving family around him, and not having the one he loved more than anything with him" I say crying. "Hikari, it hurts, but it is a gift, you will understand him completely before he comes to you, you will have seen his pains and his joys, and it shows me how much you love him and need him." Juzo says gently."You have commented on how close Aoki and I are, well, we understand one another very well, he knows me so well, as I do him" Juzo says. "We got to understand each other by waiting so long for one another after we had bonded" he says. "But we haven't bonded yet" I say insistently.

"Haven't you?" Juzo asks softly. "You miss him now, so much you can hardly stand it, and he is unable to think of anything but your love and how much he needs you when you two talk on the phone" Juzo says. "You bonded all of those long months ago, when he took you for your first time, and he has been fighting against his bond to you, it would have broken lesser animals way before now, and yet he endures it, for the promise of having you soon" Juzo says softly. "And you will find when you see him next, you understand him more than you possibly could, no more time than you've actually spent together" Juzo says smiling.

"He knows you, he knew enough of you to go to your office, he did not know you would be drawn back to him, after you saw him in your office." Juzo says gently. "He didn't know, but he could have easily killed himself at home, but he went to your office, subconsciously praying you'd be there" he adds. "He had faith in you, as you have faith in him, and you knew how to reach him in his suicidal despair, you reached him when no one else could" Juzo says softly. "I thought it was my training" I say a bit put out. "No, it was, but you knew how to use it to reach your Horse lover when he needed you most" Juzo says smiling again.

"Use this time, my Grizzly son, think on him, get to understand him and know him, as he's getting to know you now, he's also learning himself" Juzo says. "He was so much of what he thought he should be, and he fought his own self to be what he thought he wanted to be, a father and a husband" Juzo says. "He fought being gay, and he had been sexually active, so he could not give it up, but he thought of himself as Bi, but he was not" Juzo says softly.

"He met you, the other half of his soul that day at the fair, Hikari, and he fell for you, but he fought it" he says. "And Takeru and Daichi did not know that asking him to be your first would do what it did, but then he could no longer deny his love for you, and the two of you bonded, but he could not hurt his wife and colts, and he fought hard against it, and he ran from the pain it caused."Juzo says sadly. "He is the other half of your soul, as you are his, when he has you as he wants you, he will show you love the likes of which you've never known, Hikari" Juzo says. "You two will be like my Aoki and I, and you will get tighter bonded to each other as time goes on, he will never give you or your Dad cause to regret his taking you to him" Juzo says softly. "I want us to be like you and Aoki, he looks at you with so much love in his eyes, as you do him" I say kissing Juzo.

"Why did you call me your Grizzly son?" I ask. "When I first saw you, so tiny, and beautiful, and full of promise, I felt so much pride" Juzo says. "I could not have loved you more or been more proud of you if I had of sired you, Hikari" Juzo says. "I knew then I would be with this family until I took my last breath" he says. "I have only gotten prouder of you as time has gone on" Juzo says kissing me. "I love you as if you were my own son, and I would do anything for you" he says grinning. "I am so happy you have loved me and cared for me over the years, Juzo" I say softly. "I don't know how to thank you for this, nor do I know how you know, but you always have known how things are" I say kissing him.

"Be sad as you should be, but think on what I have said, try to put yourself in his place, and use that to make your love stronger" Juzo says. "It will hurt to be without him, but he won't be away for as long as you think, he will be boosted by his love for you, and when you get to spend time with him soon, he will heal a lot faster, and he will not be away from you long" Juzo says. I nod, and I go shower and dress for work. I sit and have breakfast. I am still sad, but I know now it will be for the better, and I am comforted knowing I am already bonded to my Clydesdale. I can feel his heart if I close my eyes and think of him. And I hope he can feel mine. I'll bring it up to him when I go see him, next weekend.

I go to work, but things are not too bad. I feel sad, but I think on what Juzo has told me. And I focus on my Horse, and I slip into Dr Watanabe's office and I get his file. I know it's not exactly Kosher, but I have to do this, I have to know him. I read his file. Juzo was, as usual, amazingly correct, he was gay, but wanted colts and wanted to be like everyone else, as he had been raised to be. His own sire was very homophobic, and he must have been badly torn between his nature and how he was raised to be. He broke loose in college, and was very sexually active.

And then I get a shock. Kenichi had an affair throughout college with my Dad. It was more than just Dad being with him several times, or as Kenichi said Dad keeping him sexually satisfied so he could focus on school. Dad was going to school and trying to grow his business which had not grown anywhere near what it is now. Dad was preoccupied with that, and Kenichi wanted to bond with Dad, yet they never did. But they were a couple throughout college. They lived together even. Neither of them said a word to me about it. But then again, Kenichi never really had much of a chance to tell me. But Dad should have told me. It explains why Dad went to him so quickly when Kenichi was breaking down that first night. I have to wonder how much Dad might still love him. I resume reading Kenichi's file. Wondering what other surprises might await me.

Apparently, they had a bad fight right before Graduation, Kenichi begged Dad to try to bond him, and Dad refused. In fact Dad was dating Mom at the time, and they married right after Dad graduated. Kenichi married six months later. They became friends again, a few years later. And Dad would occasionally have sex with him. Kenichi did not love Dad anymore, except as a friend and as a fuck buddy, as they call it now. Or at least that is what he told Dr Watanabe.

When Kenichi first saw us at that fair, he was very taken with me.. He hid his feelings but was friendly to us. And he almost didn't come to dinner when Dad told him he wanted him to be my first. Daichi talked him into it. I'll have to thank my loving Lion Dad for that. And he was devastated when he realized how truly and deeply he fell for me. He wanted me, but he could not stand to hurt his wife and his colts. But reading of his confessed feelings for me, I am stunned, we had to have bonded, but I do not know how I could have dealt with it when it almost broke him. And as I think it over, it had to be that I threw myself into school. Knowing he'd avoid me and never come to me again.

And then I read more. He had the pains of not wanting to hurt his family, and one some level not wanting to be gay. But Dr Watanabe had been working on him since then to help him accept his being gay, even if he did stay married. And he has to an extent. He must have cared for his wife more than even he knew. As I think it over her leaving really did push him over the edge. He was unknowingly bonded to me, and he had his sons and his wife, and he really thought he had lost it all. Though why he didn't know I loved him from the talk in my office I don't know. His pain must have been blinding him to it, though he did respond to my love. I feel so sad for my beautiful Horse. I have to make this up to him, I know I'm not totally responsible for his pains, but still. I long to hold him and comfort him now, knowing I can't and that I'm the last one who can help him until he has healed.

I have a lot more to think about now. I take the folder back to Dr. Watanabe's office,and I go back to my office and sit and think for a while waiting for my next appointment. But my mind keeps going back to Dad and Kenichi. Why did Dad never tell me of his history with Kenichi? And if he had an affair with him why did he choose Kenichi for me to lose my virginity to?. It just seems odd to me. His old lover to break me in, and did he know Kenichi already had a crush? Daichi said he did just from watching Kenichi with me at the fair, but did Dad know? And how did Dad feel about Kenichi taking me, he was sad, I thought it was just that it was a sign I was grown up, but was Dad sad to be 'giving up Kenichi' to me? I know Dad and I are going to have to have a very uncomfortable conversation pretty soon.

I am glad my next patient is who he is, he'll keep my mind occupied, as he's really in crisis, and he's a good Fox. He was injured during sex by his lover, a huge Bull, who is crushed at accidentally injuring his love. They are determined to stay together, but Jin, the Fox is terrified when they try to have sex, and tightens up so much that they can't. And his Bull, Kenshiro is really getting upset and horny.

Apparently, Kenshiro is huge hung, like my Kenichi, and there was a tense situation at home, Jin's mother was visiting. And he was nervous about having sex with her in the house. Kenshiro sits in like he does sometimes. You can tell by looking at him, how much he loves his Fox. But he's so horny you can smell it. Jin is scared that Kenshiro will leave him if they can't fuck anymore. I think the anxiety is definitely making things worse for him. But I know I could help, but I don't think it's quite Kosher what I would want to do. But there are no options we haven't tried other than what's going through my mind.

Jin is desperate to get past this, but he's so scared. Kenshiro is being so tender and caring, and you can see how much it hurts him when it's brought up. The size difference doesn't help. Kenshiro is a huge Bull, easily as big as Kenichi, and Jin is smaller, 5'9" and 165 at best. And I realize I am lucky, as big as Kenichi is, that I'm only a little bit smaller. But I know why Jin wants him, I love that Kenichi is bigger than me. And they make a cute couple, and are so obviously in love. I have to help them.

I take a deep breath, and I tell them I have an idea that we have not tried yet. They both look intently at me. "My Horse mate is large too, he is a Clydesdale Horse, and he is 24 1/2" long, and 5" around." I tell them. "He's my size" Kenshiro says softly. "So you know how to take someone that large" he adds. "I do" I say softly. And I can see Kenshiro get rock hard at that thought, he is so horny, I have a sudden fear he'll just throw me on the floor and fuck me right here. Not that I'd mind, just don't want to upset Jin. Kenshiro is a gorgeous Bull though. I hope I'm doing this because I want to help them and not only because I want Kenshiro to fuck me.

"Could you teach me?"Jin asks quietly. "I have only recently gotten him, and I am not an expert but I am pretty sure I can" I say gently. "I have taken my Kenshiro in the past, but I am so upset that I can't anymore." Jin says. Kenshiro is looking at me pleadingly. I am pretty sure he's figured out what I want to do. I call my secretary and tell her to push back the next appointment, and she tells me my next appointment has canceled. I tell her I'm going to keep Jin and Kenshiro for another hour then. She's not surprised, I frequently do that with my non insured patients if I need to. And I realize in the three months I've seen these two, that I have grown really fond of them both. They are good animals, and their love has kept them together, during this crisis. And I realize Kenshiro loves his Jin just as much as my Kenichi loves me. They are so much alike in so many ways.

And I get up and lock my office door. Kenshiro looks relaxed. I know now that he has figured out what I'm planning to do. Jin is nervous. "Kenshiro gets a bit aggressive when he is this horny" Jin says tensely. Kenshiro nods his agreement. "I don't think I can take him like this"Jin says his voice showing panic.. "I am going to take him for you, in order to cool him off, so we can work with you and him together afterwards." I say softly. Jin is quiet. Kenshiro is happy now. His big grin is sexy as hell. "I will not do this if it hurts you emotionally, Jim, I thought if I could calm him down a bit, and give you some support while you take him after, that it will help" I say softly. "I know you two are closed bonded, but I can't think of anything else that we haven't tried, and it breaks my heart to see the two of you so much in love, yet hurting so badly to be with one another" I say quietly. Jin nods. And I can tell he's thinking it all out. He's silent for several moments. Kenshiro looks a bit nervous, but he's looking at my ass and practically licking his chops.

"Dr Suzakawa, I will let you, I need to be able to take him, and he may need to cum a few times to calm down enough for me to try right now" Jin says softly."Jin, I only do this because I can't think of anything else we haven't tried already to help you past this" I say softly. Kenshiro is smiling deeply. He's a beautiful Bull. Chocolate Brown fur, Deep Blue eyes, sexy Dark Brown beard, and beautiful Ivory colored horns. I am looking forward to this, assuming he doesn't hurt me in his horniness and with his size. I have always liked my big guys, but he'll be my first Bull. I can smell his heat for me since he figured this out. And Kenshiro is so much like my Kenichi. He's hot for me, but he's still looking worried for Jim.

I stand and I take off my suit. Kenshiro strips quickly. I nod to Jin to take his clothes off. And he does. But he's so nervous.

Kenshiro's massive Bull dick is hard as hell. And I take his dick in my paw. And he moans in pleasure as I handle it gently. He is almost exactly Kenichi's size. He's anxious now, and horny. He kisses me, and I kiss him back. Kenshiro tries to push me on my back right away. I can see what the problem is now. "Hold on, Big Guy" I say smiling. "You need to slow down, especially with Jin, he's scared and if you are not giving him time or letting him decide when or in what position, you're stressing him more'" I say kissing Jin. "I am sorry, my love" Kenshiro says kissing Jin. "I love you, and no one turns me on like you do, my Fox" he says softly. "He loves you, but he needs to have some control in order to calm his fears" I say softly. Jin nods.

"What do I do, how can I help my love" Kenshiro says gently. "Try this" I say pushing Kenshiro on his back. His huge Bull dick is sticking straight up. I lick his dick a bit, and I rim him. He's grunting in pleasure, and I throw my leg over him, and I sit on his dick. he growls softly. "I did not think of that" Jin says. I slide down to the base of Kenshiro's dick. "This lets you control how much of him you take, and since you'll be riding it, you can control the speed as well as the depth" I say softly. Kenshiro likes it obviously. His face is contorted in pleasure. I begin to slide up and down on him. He moans and he's grunting softly. And Jin is watching me closely. '"You're so tight" Kenshiro moans. I move a bit faster, and I vary my speed and depth. "I see" Jin says softly. Kenshiro grabs my hips and he's pushing up faster in me. I let him, I can feel how hot he is and he needs to cool down to be more gentle. I move in time with his thrusts. And Kenshiro throws his head back and bellows and he's flooding my ass with his Bull cum. I smile. And Kenshiro is panting and he looks so grateful.

And he pulls Jin to him. "I took another's ass instead of yours, forgive your Bull?" he begs. "No, I think we need to open up a bit, and Dr Suzakawa is trying to help us" Jin says softly. "I will stop loving my Fox five minutes after I am dead' he says nuzzling Jin. Jin smiles. "I want to do what you need, Jin" Kenshiro says quietly. I'm glad I'm turned away from them both. Their love and devotion to one another brings a tear to my eye. Kenshiro is all the way in me, to his balls in fact, and he's so much in love with Jim still.

"That was incredible, Dr Suzakawa' Kenshiro says smiling. "I think you can call me Hikari now, Kenshiro" I say softly. Kenshiro hasn't even sagged, he's still hot. "May we do it again?" Kenshiro begs. "Not this way, I'll show you another way" I say softly. And I get up off of his dick.

I get up on my knees. "I love it this way" Kenshiro grunts. "But Jin can't take me this way' he says sadly. "I can, so lets do it that way." I say. And Kenshiro pushes up me all the way immediately. And he's going for it. "Stop" I tell him. "Do you want to have Jin learn to take you like this?" I ask him. "I'd love it" Kenshiro says softly. "Try it again, but go slowly and gently into me, you are massive, and this way shortens the anal canal, so you cannot go all of the way in and out, you must be slower this way, and not as deep" I say softly. "I know you do not want to ever hurt Jin" I say softly. He looks sad. I lean over and I kiss him. "You did not know, he was upset and tense, and you are a bit aggressive at times, you love him so much, and he stirs your blood and your passions, but you have to think of him as well, beautiful Bull' I say kissing him. "Forgive yourself, Jin has forgiven you, he is really wanting to be able to give himself to you when and how you want him to" I tell Kenshiro. "Slow and not as deep" Kenshiro says softly.

Kenshiro slides slowly and gently into my ass. And I squeeze his dick with my ass. He growls deeply. "What did you do?' Jin asks. "I clamped down on his dick with my ass, to make up for the loss of sensation from him not going as deep, my Kenichi does the same thing, their whole shafts are as sensitive as the ends of ours" I say softly. "When you have been able to take him comfortably for a while you can practice it on him" I say smiling.

Kenshiro leans over me and he moves his knees back so he's a little farther away from my butt. "This seems to help me remember to not go as deep" Kenshiro says softly. "You love me enough to try to be more gentle and soft with me?" Jin asks. "I do, my Fox, I would not hurt you for anything" he says lovingly. I pull him down on my back. "Can you take my weight?" he asks. "I can, and I love feeling it" I say smiling. Kenshiro is focused on being gentle and he's approaching his orgasm before he's aware, he bellows and I feel him gushing into me. He lays on top of me panting. "If you could learn to take me this way, it would be so good" Kenshiro says softly. "I would love to feel your weight on me, if you can remember I am smaller than Hikari' he says. "We can try, my love" Kenshiro says. Kenshiro looks into Jin's eyes. "I would do anything for my Fox" he says with so much tenderness.

"Now we can go on my back, but you need to keep it in mind to be more gentle with Jin" I say. "I understand, I would love to go for it though, you handle me well" Kenshiro says smiling. "Do so please, when he is done again in you, I want to try to take him myself, with your support and advice'" Jin says smiling. Kenshiro is grinning. "I would love my Fox, Hikari is good, very good in fact, but he is not my loving Fox" Kenshiro says. 'It makes me happy to see how much you love Jin" I say softly. "I do, and I can't thank you enough for taking me and teaching me what I need to know to be more of what Jin needs" he says kissing me.

"May I?" Kenshiro asks. I roll onto my back and put my legs up. "Give me your all , sweet Bull, I can take you" I say pulling him down to kiss me. Kenshiro smiles. "If you're going to open up your bond, then you should find guys who can take you as hard and aggressive as you want to be, save the loving, gentle and tender love making for your Fox" I say softly. Kenshiro smiles. "I had not thought of that" he says grinning. And he pushes into me all the way. I growl and moan and I buck on his huge dick. He kisses me full tongue. "I am rough when I fuck, but I am still loving" Kenshiro says softly. "I am ready for you" I say kissing him back. And he goes for it, he's pulling out all of the way, and pushing all of the way back into me. He's moving my heavier body with his thrusts. And his face is ecstatic. And he speeds up more. And I growl and buck and moan, and I can barely think as this hot Bull works my ass hard and deep. I grab his broad back and I hump back on him. He growls and he looks so grateful. "I will not hold" he bellows. And he gushes into me. I am covered in his sweat and it's hot.

He lays on top of me panting, and he kisses me. "Hikari, I am so grateful to you for this, I was too hot blooded with my loving Fox" Kenshiro says softly. "And I was too horny" he says blushing. My guts feel bloated with Bull cum, but it's hot as hell. My fur is soaked with his sweat, and it's so damn hot.

He rolls off of me, and he's still hard. And he pulls Jin to him, and they lay kissing a bit. "I wish to try" Jin says softly. "Kenshiro, lay on your back, and let him sit on you as I did' I say smiling. "Jin, take your time, and do it when you're ready, and only take him to below the head of his dick at first" I advise him. "And Kenshiro, lay still until he begins to get comfortable" I say softly. They both smile. "I have missed having you inside of me Kenshiro" Jin says tearing up. "I have missed fucking my Fox" Kenshiro says. Jin throws his leg up, and he pushes down on Kenshiro's huge Bull dick but only to below the head. Kenshiro grunts and he looks so happy to have his love again. Jin begins to push slowly down on Kenshiro's shaft. And the look on his face is ecstatic. "I missed this, having him in me" Jin says as he slips down to the base of his lover's Bull dick. Jin moves up and down as I did. Kenshiro looks at me. "May I move a bit, Dr Suzakawa?" Kenshiro asks. "Are you ready, Jin?" I ask. "I am but I want him the other way" Jin says. "On your back?" Kenshiro asks. "No, on my knees" he says softly. 'My love" Kenshiro says softly, leaning Jin down to kiss him.

Jin gets up and he gets on his knees. "Kenshiro, you are a lucky Bull, he has a beautiful ass, and that bushy tail on top is gorgeous" I tell him. "Would you like to take him, Hikari?" Kenshiro asks. "You are a bit smaller than me, but still large, so you can show me how to take him this way where he'd love it" Kenshiro says. "Please, Hikari, you are a beautiful Big Grizzly and I would love to feel you inside of me' Jin says. "And if you do, then you can show Kenshiro and he can take me afterwards and you can make sure he has it down" Jin says softly. "If you're sure, I'd love it" I say smiling. "I am sure" Jin says. "Please, I want my Fox to be able to do this for me, so badly, but I will not risk hurting him again, please show me" Kenshiro says.

"Lean down here and suck me a bit" I tell Jin. And he takes my dick in his mouth, but he can't get a lot of me in his mouth. I am hard now. "Back up on your knees" I ask him. And he gets up onto his knees. "You're pretty big too" Jin says nervously. "I won't hurt you I swear ,Jin" I say softly. "I'm going to line my dick up with your ass, and I want you to slowly push back on it when you're ready" I say kissing him from behind. Jin nods. "I'm lined up, when you're ready then back up on me" I say kissing him and nuzzling the back of his neck. Jin pushes back, and grunts softly. He's got me about halfway now. And he stops. And he's panting. "Don't move, just get used to it, babe" I say nuzzling his neck . Jin moans. "I love that, it feels good" he says. "The nuzzling" Jin adds. "Do I not kiss or lick or nuzzle you enough, my Fox? Kenshiro asks sadly. "When you get hot enough to fuck you aren't as affectionate as you are when we start" Jin says softly. Kenshiro looks a bit sad. "Kenshiro, you need to hear this, you love him, and you want him to be sexually fulfilled?" I ask him. "I do, I hate not giving him what he needs" Kenshiro says. I'm impressed with this Bull, he loves his Fox so much.

"Are you comfortable with me inside of you?" I ask. "I am" he says. "Push back as far as you're comfortable with" I say nuzzling him. He moans, and he gently pushes back. I lean up and I nuzzle him again, on his neck and face and muzzle. And he moans and twitches and he pushes back more on my dick. And as I lick his neck he arches his back in pleasure and moves back to my balls. It's not lost on Kenshiro, which is what I wanted. Kenshiro leans in and whispers to me. "He needs to be...well..he needs to be kissed and licked and nuzzled to relax to be how I want him to be in bed?" he asks. "He needs to feel loved and not just a sex toy for you, Big Bull" I say softly. "I don't treat him that way" he says a bit hurt. "No, I've only seen you be loving and caring to him, but he sees your aggressive fucking as not being loved, just fucked, love him like this and he'll do anything you want him to" I say softly. Jin is moaning and humping on my massive Grizzly dick, and growling in pleasure. "See, make him feel loved, and to feel that he wants to do anything to please you, and he'll be the bottom you want him to be." I say softly.

Kenshiro kisses me. He's got tears in his eyes. "I want him to be happy too, is this what he needs to be happy, to feel I'm loving him even if we're just having play sex?" he asks. "He's had a trauma of sorts in the past, and he can feel unloved quickly" I say softly. Jin is moving faster on my dick and it's feeling hot to me. I grab his hips. "Can you let me lead,babe?" I ask. "Please, it's so hot this way" Jin moans. And I start slowly but I build up faster and deeper until I'm as deep as I think I should go. Jin's growling and his legs are shaking and he's twitching. I lean up and I hold him. I'm literally surrounding him with my body as I"m so much bigger. He's being cuddle fucked now, and he loves it and he's getting hotter. Kenshiro is watching intently I nuzzle his neck and he growls and shoots on the floor. I slow. "Please don't stop" he begs me. I speed up a bit. "OH GOD" he growls. And he's making incoherent noises now. And he grips my dick with his ass, and I roar and shoot in him. Jin shoots on the floor again and he's panting hard. Kenshiro kisses me. "That was so hot to watch, and very instructive"he says. I lay Jin down on the floor, and let him catch his breath. I pull Kenshiro over to me, and we talk quietly and we go over what I have shown him.

"I love him, and I will make him happy in bed from now on Dr Suzakawa, I swear" he says. I kiss him gently. "Kenshiro, you love him so much, there was nothing wrong with how you make love, you set my blood on fire each time, but Jin has had problems in the past with others, and he needs to be handled carefully" I say smiling. "I have all the faith in the world that now that you know, you'll make him happy, and in turn, he'll be all over you as often as he can" I say smiling."Really?" he asks. "If I give him the loving, and nuzzling and cuddling during sex, it sets him on fire" he asks. "It does, and you saw how he reacts, and it ought to be stronger with you since he loves you so much" I say smiling.

Jin stirs a bit, and he's happy. "That was incredible" Jin says. "Will my Fox still take me?" Kenshiro asks. Jin gets up on his knees. Kenshiro moves behind him, and he leans forward and licks Jin all over his neck and face and chest. Jin is moaning and groaning. Kenshiro wraps his huge Bull body around his Fox and he cuddles him as he slips his massive dick halfway in him and stops. Jin is whimpering but not from pain. His eyes are glassy and he's moaning now. "Fuck me, Bull Daddy" Jin whines. And Kenshiro looks at me. "Start slow" I whisper to him. And Kenshiro moves slowly and gently in his lover. And after a few minutes, Jin hollers, "Fuck me, harder, Bull Daddy" Kenshiro looks at me, and I shrug my shoulders. And Kenshiro begins to fuck his Jin hard . Jin is whining and growling and bucking. Jin starts humping back on Kenshiro's dick like he did mine. Kenshiro has a tear in his eye. "Thank you, Hikari" he says weeping softly. Jin is going crazy on Kenshiro's massive dick, and Kenshiro is ecstatic and joyous now. He's still kissing Jin and nuzzling his neck and face. Jin hollers and cums on the floor. Kenshiro bellows and he convulses hard and he moos loudly and he's cumming hard now.

Kenshiro rolls them onto their sides and he holds his Fox tightly, and they're both crying. "You just needed to feel cared about, Jin, and then you could unlock your love and your passion for your Bull Daddy" I say kissing him. Kenshiro kisses me.

"Kenshiro, you might think about letting Jin choose the position he wants you to take him in each time for a while, and he'll get comfortable" I say smiling. I get up and I redress.

They get up and dress too. They hug and hold one another. I hug them both. "Dr Suzakawa, we can't thank you enough" Jin says softly. "I'm glad we finally broke through, you two love one another so much, and you'll be so happy together now" I say. "You're a lucky couple, Kenshiro is quite a Bull Daddy and a magnificent fuck, and Jin, you're a great bottom," I say smiling.

They hug me, and cry on my shoulders for a minute, and they leave. I'm very happy for them. I'll see them once more and then I'll just keep them on the rolls in case they have more difficulty. But it worked. I"m willing to bet they'll go home and fuck for the rest of the day. Jin was a tight bottom, and Kenshiro was a magnificent top.

I sit at my desk and I am happy. I didn't realize how horny I had been. And Kenshiro's dick was so much like Kenichi's but he's a much more aggressive fuck. And I find myself missing my Horse's fucking. Even though I've only had him once a long time ago. But I have replayed that night in my mind thousands of times since. And I ache to feel my Clydesdale's Horse Cock spreading my asshole again.

I sit and look out the window for a bit. And then I get a call from our inpatient unit. "I am Dr Shiba, Dr Suzakawa" I hear. "You are Kenichi's chief therapist?" I ask. "I am, and I wished to talk with you about Dr Ryouta" he says softly. "Anything wrong?" I ask . "No, in fact the opposite, he's doing so well, we want to see if he can handle an outside pass" he says. "He is to live with you when he is out?" he asks. "He is" I say. "We are bonded we think, but I will spend my life with him" I say firmly. "We would like you to come pick him up tomorrow night after work, and keep him for overnight and see how he copes" Dr Shiba says happily. "He moved past his guilt and we feel if he is with you, and it does not immediately spur on the guilt to return then he just needs to be with the love of his life and go on rebuilding his life with your support" Dr Shiba says. "I will get his things from his home then" I say. "It would be good if he did not have to face his rented home where he was with his wife, he will handle it but it will cause him more pain" Dr Shiba says. "I will have his keys and the address messengered over to your office, Dr Suzakawa" he says. "We have an opportunity here most don't get, he will be watched by you, you love him, but you were still able to be very therapeutic with him, and he is no longer suicidal, but he will be safe with his love" Dr Shiba says. "Thank you, Dr Shiba, I will take good care of my Horse." I say happily.

"What if he does well on his outside pass?" I say softly. "He will then be released on Friday, to be followed up in outpatient therapy with Dr Watanabe" he says. "You can then take him home for good, Dr Suzakawa" Dr Shiba says. "Thank you" I say and I break down into tears. "Happy are you, Dr Suzakawa?" he says. "I have missed him so much even though we had not been together, but I think we bonded back when we first had sex" I say softly. "I would agree, nothing else would have kept him going through all of this" he says happily. "I will send his keys, if you can clear out his home so he doesn't have to go back it will help him tremendously" Dr Shiba says. "Thank you, I will" I say softly.

I sit and I cry a minute or two. Juzo calls me. "Aoki and I will go get Kenichi's things after dinner, we have a truck lined up, and we will put his furniture in the storage building" Juzo says happily. "I don't know how you knew, but you knew this would happen, didn't you Juzo?" I ask. "I did my Grizzly son" he says happily. "I am grateful, my Grizzly son will be so happy now" Juzo says. "I love you , Juzo, you've been so good to me" I say softly.

It's going to be a good week and a good life I know now. I just have to hold on a bit longer, Kenichi will be with me tomorrow night, and he'll be mine for good soon.