FSE

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Umm... yeah. I had a HORRIBLE time writing this chapter. It's short and late because I have absolutely NO CLUE how to write the next part.

As always, I'm happy for feedback and criticism (prefferably constructive, but honesty is more important). If you didn't like it, please take the time to tell my why :). Thanks!

And, the story's main character is bi, so continue at your own risk.

Thanks for reading!

• Xi

NOTE: Thanks so much to [Tank Jaeger](%5C) for suggesting that I include what happened to Nick's phone, which now happens in the dialogue near the beginning.

All's Fair - Part 10

"...not acting at all like you said he would, Jake."

"He's doing fine, though. He hasn't talked back to you or been rude or anyth -"

"That's not what I meant. He's been behaving all right - not the greatest, but all right. But you told us you were friends, and he'd like to stay with us. He's certainly not acting like it."

"He likes it here, really - better than the correction center, by a long shot. He's just going through some problems right now. Please, Dad, I don't want him to have to go back there."

"Relax, kiddo; we're not going to send him back.

But don't try to pass this off as 'just some problems'. I don't call coming home and throwing his phone into a wall, almost putting his chair through a window, destroying his bedcovers 'just some problems'."

"I - I know, but he didn't do any serious damage, it was just stuff. He didn't even yell at anyone but me, didn't try to hurt hims... Dad? Did he?"

"...No. And the correction center says he's fairly low-risk. But we don't like it when you lie to us, Jake, and you two definitely do not act like friends. Why did you say you were?"

"...I..."

"...You what?"

"I - nothing."

"All right, Jake. You don't have to talk about it, but - just don't lie to us again, all right?"

"Okay. I'm sorry, Mum, Dad."

"It's fine. But you also said you'd take responsibility for him, and he's barely said a word all week."

"Yeah. I'll try to talk to him about it. And - thanks, both of you."

I silently pulled my ear away from the door to the master suite and slipped outside into the welcoming darkness, just in time that Jake didn't see me when he left. A bare ten seconds and I was hidden at the bottom of the drained swimming pool, with only the unlocked back door to hint at where I'd gone. There was no moon out, so the black air was leavened only by the muffled glow from the master bedroom's window, hidden behind a hedge, and by the faint stars far, far above.

Pressing my back against the freezing stone, I curled my tail around my ankles and focused on keeping my expression blank. It must be nice, I guess, to have someone who'll forgive you just because you say you're sorry. But I think I was glad I didn't - it puts a lot of responsibility on your end to live up to the forgiveness, and I'm bad at that.

Anyway, it was nice to know I was "low-risk". Kind of funny, in a macabre sort of way, that that was what people wondered about me behind my back.

So. Did I feel like talking to Jake about it? Mm. Not really. Much more entertaining to watch him catch flak with his parents for me.

That was about when my conscience started jumping around in my chest, trying to get my attention. Not being on speaking terms with it in the general way of things, the move caught me a bit by surprise. It took advantage of the moment to foist a bunch of memories on me: Jake holding doors for me, helping me with homework, keeping me from getting my face pounded into the ground. Little things.

All right, so maybe I could at least stop moping.

The icy rock felt good against my fur. I half-sighed, half-laughed. Always the mind focuses on trivialities. After a while I shut my eyes and dozed off.

Which, I discovered a few hours later, was a really bad idea. I woke up so cold I'd nearly stopped shivering, and stiff in every muscle and bone. Yet, even though I'd not been so uncomfortable for a long time, the first thing my body tried to do was go back to sleep. It was actually a bit frightening that it was so hard to get moving again. That jolt of fear was what really got me up, and I staggered drunkenly a few feet towards the shallow end of the pool before my stiff, frost-coated legs gave way and sent me into a face plant. I yelped, the sound seeming loud in the night, and tasted blood where I bit my tongue. A couple drops fell to the ground as I picked myself up and got the rest of the way out of the pool, taking a little more care this time.

The door was locked. I jerked on the handle uselessly for a minute and felt panic start to build in my chest at the thought of being locked out. But I got a hold of myself quickly - it was just an instinctive response. Someone must have noticed the door and locked it, was all. I had a couple options - either stick it out 'till morning or call for help. The second was definitely appealing - being freezing cold has that effect - but pride made me push the thought away. It had been too long since I'd even made an attempt at conversation, and I'd only known them for a few days before then anyway. Not a position from which to comfortably ask for help. The walls were too thick. And besides, it couldn't be more than a couple of hours until dawn; it had been past midnight when I came out here.

I knew that sitting down again was a bad idea, so I forced myself to start pacing back and forth on the patio, rubbing my paws together and chafing my arms. It probably helped, but it sure didn't feel like it at the time.

It took me maybe fifteen minutes of this to realize that I'd tried the wrong door. The one I'd actually left by was still unlocked.

I was still swearing as I walked past Jake's bedroom and realized his light was still on, shining from under his door. My teeth clicked together as I realized suddenly just how much noise I'd been making for whatever-hour-of-the-morning-it-was. But I couldn't hear him stirring at all. Maybe he'd just been reading or something and forgotten to turn it off. So I finished the trip to my room and got into bed, curling up and shuddering uncontrollably as the warmth slowly seeped into me. But the bitter chill in my bones refused to lessen, and finally it forced me out of bed again and into the shower. I turned the water as hot as it would go, but immediately shrieked in pain and turned it off as it punched through my fur and connected with my icy skin. I was more careful the second time around, slowly working my way up to the higher setting. I stood under the steaming water for almost an hour before I remembered to actually wash myself. But it served its purpose; when I finally got out I was feeling pleasantly warm straight through my toes and quite prepared to get back under my crimson bed covers and stay there for the foreseeable future.

Which was why I met the wolf waiting for me on the balcony with decidedly mixed feelings. On the one paw, I was in a decent mood now; but on the other, he was between me and said covers, and it didn't help that I'd not bothered with more than underwear for the short distance back to my room. I wished I could put the fact that it was Jake on the other paw too, but something stopped me. Probably that whole conscience deal again; it was telling me that I'd just run out of procrastination time.

It also didn't help that I didn't expect anyone to be up so early, and therefore wasn't looking where I was going, and therefore ran straight into him.

He caught me, albeit awkwardly, and I wound up plastered against his chest instead of the floor. His scent filled my nose, even through the skintight undershirt he had on.

After a couple seconds he released me, but kept his paws on my shoulders as though afraid I might keel over. I shook my head experimentally, trying to clear my nostrils, and looked up - way up - at his face. "Are you okay?" he half-whispered. I couldn't see his expression in the gloom, but he sounded almost afraid. Weird.

"No, I'm dying of a broken neck," I answered in a biting whisper. I started edging around his muscular frame, sliding one paw around his torso to make sure I didn't run into him again.

He caught my paw before I got out of range. "Nick, I need to talk to you."

"That's nice," I snapped, before remembering that I'd said I would quit moping. I sighed. "What?"

"It - you didn't stay here tonight."

I shook my head, then realized he probably couldn't see me any better than I could see him. "No, I -" I stopped in mid-sentence. "How do you know that?"

He did a decent job of hiding his abashment. "I checked. I wanted to talk to you before I went to bed."

"You checked. In the middle of the night. With my light off. And no response." My voice was absolutely expressionless. He shifted uncomfortably, making the wood under his feet creak very softly. "You do this often?" I knew he didn't - I locked my door at night.

"No!" He sounded honestly offended; either he was a better liar than I'd given him credit for, or he really hadn't tried before.

After a short pause, I sighed again. "I'm tired." If only I could leave it at that for a few more hours, but I knew I couldn't; not this time. "We can talk in my room, if it's really that important."

I took the last three steps to my door, and stopped Jake there until I'd found the lamp over my bed and turned it on - as low as it would go, but enough to see by. It was necessary; most of my possessions were littered over the floor; anyone who didn't know where they all were stood an excellent chance of really dying of a broken neck. Which made me wonder for a second why I'd turned the lamp on.

I sat in front of the pillows and wrapped the comforter around my shoulders while Jake made a careful path to the foot of the bed. I kind of wished he'd chosen the seat in the corner, but considering the state of the floor I could understand why he hadn't.

He said nothing for a couple minutes, just looked at me with an expression I couldn't read. Eventually I broke the silence. "So... you wanted to talk to me?"

He blinked, and shook his head as if shedding a daydream. "Uh, yeah. It's - well, you've been pretty out of it for the last week or so."

I was silent for a little bit, then a corner of my mouth quirked up a little. I've seen myself do that in a mirror; it's not a pleasant or inviting expression. "You might want to go put some pants on, you know."

It was always nice to know that I wasn't the only one who could blush, even if some furs are lucky enough to have darker fur on their face. Jake's hot flush was visible despite it, though, as he all but ran to his own room. The silvery fur inside his ears nearly glowed. As soon as he was gone I quickly got up and put on pants of my own, grateful that the comforter had hidden me. Now if only I wouldn't get to the point where he could smell me. Damn him for being so hot.

A minute later he returned into the dim circle of light in my room, wearing some jeans and still blushing. I waited for him to speak, but he didn't comply, so I did. "Since I came back from Ivan's, you mean. I don't much feel like discussing it, so how about this: I'll pretend I'm okay so that Dan and Halo will think you talked to me and get off your case. 'Kay?"

He looked straight into my eyes. "Not really," he answered quietly. A small tremor ran through my body, and I ducked away from his gaze.

Not a good move; he shifted closer and gently lifted my chin. I quickly got a hold of myself again and tossed my head to get away from his paw, then squarely met his eyes of my own accord. "They were right, you know," I said, keeping my voice cool and laying the bait thicker this time. "You and I aren't friends; you really ought to have listened."

He took it. "You were eavesdropping?" I nodded with a small, mocking smile, and he opened his muzzle again, starting to look a little angry. Unfortunately for me, he shut it again and took a deep breath, refusing to be sidetracked. Damn.

"Were you trying to worry me when you called Mum and told her who you were spending the night with?" the wolf asked.

I blinked at the almost non sequitur, and at the pained way he'd asked it. "No," I answered honestly. "She asked me who I was with, is all."

He sighed in relief, to my further confusion. "So what happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Did you two fight?"

"Shut up."

He sighed again, then reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone. "This is for you," he said, holding it out to me while studying the mattress. "Since you broke yours when you came back."

I took it with a bemused smile. Another non sequitur. Better yet, he'd tied a length of scarlet ribbon around it. "What, did Halo tell you I had to have a phone as well as clothes?" Jake didn't answer, and after a moment's thought I decided that meant I probably didn't want to know.

Eventually he broke the silence. "You could call him, talk things out."

"I don't have his number," I responded automatically.

"I do. I could give it to you."

"What makes you think I want to talk things out? I don't ever want to see him again!"

He looked up, met my eyes. I immediately looked down and hid my face behind my arm, propped up on my knees. "Bullshit," he said softly. I whimpered very quietly. He carefully laid a paw on my shoulder, and I jerked away from the touch and backhanded him across the face.

"Get the fuck off of me!" I snarled. He must not have been expecting the strike; he didn't even try to block and his head jolted to the side. For a moment he just looked nonplussed, then his brows lowered dangerously. I smiled, cold. He opened his muzzle, but seemed to think better of it and shut it again with a snap. His claws dug into the blankets.

Finally he chuckled as though against his will. "Nick one, Jake zero," he murmured ruefully, rubbing his chin and startling some warmth into my smile. He grinned back. "Always good to know when I'm appreciated." Without warning he reached over and quickly dragged me against his body. He chuckled while I gave a surprised-to-annoyed yelp and started trying unsuccessfully to squirm out of his grasp, streaming unintelligible names into his shirt. "So there," he whispered over my head.

Slowly I stopped moving as the brief playfulness slipped out of the air. Jake cautiously loosened his hold, then slid a paw under my legs and pulled me to a more comfortable position next to him. I curled up against his chest, sitting halfway in the larger wolf's lap, and listened to his heartbeat so I wouldn't have to say anything. One of his claws was slowly tracing the edge of my ear; the tickling sensation made it flick involuntarily back and forth. I was starting to doze off by the time his quiet voice broke the silence. "I bet he'd call it pax if you don't go too far. And, obnoxious as you are with him, I kind of prefer you when you talk once in a while." I clamped my mouth shut while a tear leaked into the fabric pressing against my face.

Eventually his heartbeat lulled me to sleep. When I woke up the sun was shining high, he was gone, and there was a cell phone on the shelf by my bed, tied with scarlet ribbon and holding down a post-it note with a phone number.

***

...And this was my dead give-away chapter. I feel like I ought to like it, but something feels off somehow. No idea what.

So: pop quiz! These are just some things I'm curious about. 1: how obvious is the title? 2: do you think Nick will ever get Ivan (or anyone else, for that matter)? Do you want him to? 3: who is your least favorite character, major or minor, and why? Obviously, answering is optional :). Thanks again for reading my story.