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ZOMG Moar Tips For Aspiring Writers

Mmm, yes, I'm back again, the rambling writer who occasionally posts stuff that he thinks might be helpful, as if he's actually qualified to give this kind of advice. Hehe. ANYhow, I came up with a few more ideas that I either haven't covered before, or haven't covered in as much detail. Things like power sentences, the proper use of fragments, tightening your POVs, the difference between showing, telling and assisted telling, and maybe some dialogue stuff. Enjoy! Or... not. XP

Let's start off with POV. For those who don't know, POV stands for Point of View, aka perspective. One thing I see a lot of is accidental omniscience; random interjections with thoughts of characters other than the current POV character. Sometimes it's more subtle too, such as a statement of fact that should only come from the non-POV character's viewpoint.

For example: Jim nodded, happy he had gotten his point across.

Unless Jim is the POV character, this is an omniscient statement. It's very easy to do. This ONLY works if you are writing a true omniscient point of view. If you are not, you need to make sure your character isn't mind reading (unless they happen to be psychic, in which case you still need to change the form a bit to show that that is what they are doing.)

Things you commonly see in true omniscient are a kind of "zooming out", or, birds-eye-view. For example:

James backflipped elatedly down the hall. Unsurprising, considering he had just been informed he was the winner of a ten billion dollar lottery.

'Awesomeawesomeawesome!' he kept shouting in his mind, unaware of the nasty shock that awaited him. With a startled yell, he tripped over his younger brother's skateboard, sending him crashing to the ground with the sickening crunch of snapping bone.

In general, omniscient view is more involved with telling than showing. It should feel removed enough from the story, but still give a good sense of what's going on and what the characters are going through. The author can also randomly interject in amusing fashion, which, while fourth wall breaking, can work in this kind of story. It's essentially a "voice of god" that can come in with knowledge that the characters don't know.

Now, to go the other direction, and "zoom in" more. If you really want to dig into your characters, you need to do your best to get inside their heads. Try to visualize their thought process and feelings, then put that down on paper. This is where things such as fragments and power sentences come in.

Thoughts and emotions aren't necessarily going to be ordered and structured, much like dialogue. You can emphasize and question, things you can't do in action or scene description. You can lend a very raw feel to your character's musing by doing two things: writing very metaphorically AND stating things plainly. It may sound like a contradiction, but that's what lends a power sentence it's punch.

An example from one of my recent works:

"Hector, my sweet Hector... P-please..." she sobbed out loud, hoping, pleading for the horrible stillness to be broken by his voice.

It wasn't.

The silence loomed even more menacingly, teaming up with the blackness to surround her, like taunting demons rising from the depths. Dank, oily fingers plucked at her heartstrings. Where was he? Why hadn't he come back yet? When would this end?

See how the isolated sentence contrasts with the surrounding text, bringing out the stark, bleak feeling of the scene? You can use that to really punch your point across. It's a heavy handed technique, and isn't particularly in line with "showing", but it can be extremely effective.

This leads to another point: the use of fragments. In most prose writing, you want to avoid incomplete sentences. In dialogue and thoughts, both direct and indirect, you can get away with it if you do it right. Having fragmented thoughts can lend an instinctual, rapid feel to the thought pattern, much in the way isolated power sentences do.

Sample:

She could almost see it, feel it, hear it. The flickering, dancing flames of hell, appearing as twisting demons with charring touch. Waves of heat, parching clothing, blistering bare skin and frying hair, whisking the moisture from her mouth like arid soil absorbed the rain. Thick, acrid smoke, replacing the life giving air and scorching the walls of her throat and lungs. Crackles and pops, the sizzle of burning wood, the crash of falling beams, the shrieks of the sirens and the dying...

Some final thoughts on tightening your POV...

Keep in mind the things your character notices. Do they have an eye for details? Do they take in the big picture? If your character is a trained spy, they're going to take in different information than if they're a nun. What they think about, how they think it, says a lot about your character. Also, what are they NOT noticing? This can be equally important.

Now, the difference between showing and telling.

Showing is exactly what it sounds like. You show the reader what is happening, and let them figure out what it means. You don't explain right out what the intention is, you involve the reader by letting them connect the dots. It's a bit like playing music. You don't play the melody straight up, you play around it and support it. In this case, you don't write the event straight out, you paint the details of it and let the reader figure out the whole picture.

Assisted telling straddles the fence. This is where you tell the reader what is happening, but you also describe it. This is often erroneously used as a substitute for showing. While descriptive imagery is very good, it doesn't mean you're showing.

Telling is the other end of the spectrum: starkly stating what's happening, often lacking any kind of imagery.

Here's a sample to better illustrate the differences. All three contain the same information, just presented in different fashion.

Alex stared at his shoes, hands crammed into his pockets as he scuffed the grass beneath his feet, a hint of crimson rising to his cheeks. "Yeah, well..."

Alex looked embarrassed, staring at his shoes with his hands in his pockets, a blush rising to his cheeks as he scuffed the grass with his foot. "Yeah, well..."

Alex looked embarrassed. "Yeah, well..."

In the first, you are left to decide how exactly Alex feels. The second tells you, but also provides a description. The third merely tells you. Most of the time, you'll hear it is better to show rather than tell. While it IS the most involving style, I would take that with a grain of salt, and say it depends on the scenario and story you are writing. You're the author, choose which feels right to you. As I've demonstrated, telling can be an effective tool, so long as it doesn't become a gimmick.

Speaking of dialogue... Oh, we weren't? Well, we are now! Dialogue can be tricky. I don't have a lot to say on the subject, but I can at least pass on a few pointers that I've picked up.

Try to give your characters a unique "voice" if you can. How they phrase things is going to be affected by many aspects, such as their culture, time period, and general personality. I often like to apply a word or "catchphrase" of sorts that the character likes to use. You need to make sure it's just enough to add flavour to your characters, but no so much that it becomes cheesy. Perhaps they like to use the longest, most important sounding words they can. Maybe they're terse and to the point. Or maybe they cut off and combine a lot of words. How your characters speak during dialogue says a lot about them as well.

If a character is feeling shy or hesitant, this will often come out in their speech. You can show this through use of ellipses. If they're happy and excited, a lot of their speech can be punctuated with exclamation points. Try to take into account their emotions and how it would affect their speech.

You want to avoid sounding out all the little quirks that come with real life dialogue. Unless they're absolutely necessary, don't add in all the ums and ers you might hear in a typical conversation. You want your dialogue to flow and sound natural, but not be too chopped and OVERLY realistic. However, it IS okay to chop speech in the form of accents and such. It can lend your character that unique voice that will set them apart. It's something to be careful with though, because if it is done poorly, it can be very irritating.

Some final, random thoughts...

I've mentioned earlier about writing descriptively. I want to add the caveat not to go overboard with it. Painting a poetic picture is great, but if your writing gets TOO flowery and detailed, it will detract from the story. Chances are, not knowing the exact hue of somebody's shoelaces won't hurt your story. Once again, this is something you have to decide for yourself. Find a balance that seems to fit.

Also on the topic of description, make sure you don't mix your metaphors. Figure out what feeling you want to lend to a particular scene, and have your metaphors line up with that. Otherwise, you send mixed signals to your readers. Also, make sure the adjectives and adverbs you choose don't send the wrong picture either. What is the connotation?

Make sure your cause and effect are properly placed. What are you trying to say in a particular passage? Does it sound like one thing is affecting something else? Should it be doing that? Are the correct subjects performing the action? Try to keep the voice active: make the subjects perform the actions. The subject is whatever you want to draw attention to in a particular sentence. If they are NOT performing the action, they fade into the background.

Try to strip off as much unnecessary fat from your writing as possible. Things that are made obvious by the surrounding text don't need to be stated, such as saying that a carpet covers the floor, or whatever else is inherently implied by the nature of your subject and predicate. Also, trimming the extra quantifying statements and prepositions and such helps your writing feel snappier and crisper.

That's about it for this issue. I hope a grain of something useful trickles through from my random ramblings. As always, have fun in your writings!