A simple story III : Part 4
#4 of A simple story III
For Fred, the hardest part began now. The plane trip had been smooth. Aside from the wailing and screaming baby showing his deep disapproval of being transported from one continent to another. And another child, who half the plane would have gladly thrown out of one of the windows. He had concentrated on his tablet and read, wondering if by any chance some law justified infanticide in this particular case. Fred traveled in uniform, sometimes drawing the gaze and approval of men and women around him, showing their traditional support for the soldiers. Once at the luggage rack, he retrieved his bag and slung it over his shoulder before heading to the arrivals hall.
As he expected, they were there. They were so happy, so reassured at last. His mother was the first to hug him, hugging him tight, sobbing in his neck. She was wearing blue pants and a top the same color but darker. Her arms were so thin that Fred wondered where she could find the strength to crush his pecs.
« Ohhh there you are finally ! My son ... My little one ... "
Fred rolled his eyes. He knew, even when he would be 40, he would still be her little one. However, he understood his mother, who had lived through terrible days believing in his death a few months ago now. Fred put his hands behind his back.
" I'm here now mom. I'm here.
- If only you could not go back ... "
Fred's smile widened.
" I'm only here for ten days mom. I will leave after. "
Daisy knew it, but she did everything to ignore the fact. Her son had come back to her and she was counting on making the most of it before seeing him leave. Fred understood her tears of joy and he saw that his father, behind, was also having trouble holding them back. Fred only freed himself from the maternal grip to fall into his father's arms, larger, more powerful, more painful.
" Oh, my son... "
John's arms had succeeded his mother's. Fred knew that there was nothing he could do with them. All he could hope for was to have some room in between to breathe.
" Dad...
Never do something like that to us again, do you hear me ?
Dad, I promise... But you crush me there ...
So much the better. "
Fred pulled away slowly, catching his breath, his bag at his feet, smiling.
" I'm happy to come back here, even if it's just for a few days. "
Daisy then asked him
« Do you know what you'll do next ? »
Mmm yes mom. My unit is transferred. We are going to London. Finally close to.
London... That's good, yes indeed you risk nothing... "
Daisy took the opportunity to pick up her son in her arms again. John looked at his son then at his uniform, noting a change.
" Uh Fred... Since when do sergeants wear three chevrons on their shoulders ?
- Hmm... They do everything to keep me... Including making me a Staff Sergeant... "
John looked at his son's new stripes, a big smile on his face. Then he showed something on his chest.
« And that what is it ? But it's...
- The Bronze Star, yes... I think that's overkill, frankly... But they're really doing everything they can to keep me. "
Fred wore a red bar on his uniform, crossed out by a vertical blue and white line. The symbol of the Bronze Star whose medal he had stored somewhere in his bag.
" I was lucky, if I had been hurt, I'm sure they would have stuck a Purple Heart on me..."
Despite her disdain for the military thing, Daisy could only show her pride and happiness to see her son's actions recognized. John was inundated with happiness and pride.
" My son is an hero... Damn it, Fred, I've never been prouder of you in my whole life... You could have told us...
It's touching of them, but like I said, I think they're exaggerating. But neither can I offend them by refusing all of this.
They do this to keep you, you say ?
Yes, but it won't work. My decision has been made for a long time and I have not changed my mind. In 7 months I will be done with my military career. "
These last words delighted John and Daisy more than anything. Fred understood this quickly.
" And then ?
- I do not know yet. I am thinking of working in Seattle, but I am not sure. Toulouse and Hamburg make me interesting offers, but I do not think of going there, I speak too bad German and not at all French. "
Fred spent the rest of the evening recounting his adventure. He added everything his subordinates had done to him in the previous months. He didn't complain about it, rather laughed at it. Telling how it took him three days to get a reactor he had recklessly entrusted to a newcomer into working order put him in a very good mood despite all the extra work it had brought him.
« And what are you planning to do for the next few days ?
- I do not know. No doubt seeing my friends, well, those who have remained. I'm also thinking of going to see Mark and Ed. And then visit the region. It is... Probably the last time I will... Once at work, I will probably not have much time to do it. "
John and Daisy fully understood what Fred wanted to tell them. He was going to leave their house, for good this time. To live your life independently.
The departure for the college, then for the army, had been the first signs. Fred was a fully grown man, and as such, he had his own life to build now.
Fred went up to his room. Sitting naked on the bed, he looked at all the old memories that had piled up there. He would probably take a book or two, one or two objects, the most emblematic of his childhood, and once gone, everything else would go to the attic, for good.
That was becoming an adult. Preserve a tiny part of what was childhood and leave the rest behind. It was, a bit like actually dying. We go into the next world with only ourselves, and we leave everything else to others to cry for you, then forget you.
Fred opened a small bottle and swallowed two pills. Thanks to them, his sleep was dreamless. And without nightmares, above all.
The next day, Fred found the house empty when he woke up. He looked at the time. More than ten. His parents had been away from work for a long time. He got up, showered, then put on civilian clothes. khaki pants and an olive green shirt. Fred grimaced in the mirror. He still had military clothes on his back. He searched his bag and pulled out a yellow shirt, more to his taste and humor, as well as his black jacket. He looked at his dresser, remembering something. He took out the first drawer and turned it over, smiling. His stash was still here. he peeled off the bag before putting it in his inside pocket. he appreciated the irony of it. The first time he had had it on him, he had been in constant fear of being searched and locked in prison. Now the police wouldn't say anything to him. Once the door was locked, Fred walked over to Ladder Street. His first car was along the sidewalk. Fred smirked at this birthday present that he wouldn't use for a few more months, if ever. He needed to walk and joined Ladder Street where Ed greeted him with pleasure.
« Hey, who's there ?
Hello sir...
Ah, stop with that, I don't have white hairs yet, I'm not that old ! "
Ed embraced him in a friendly way. Fred remembered the precious help the bear had given him the night he had almost been raped by that criminal and his recklessness. Of this event, he only retained a vague embarrassment. He had experienced so much other than a comparison, it was only a bad and distant memory. Fred noticed that Ed was speaking low.
" I am disturbing ?
- Not really, but Sam is still sleeping. He just ate a little before going back to sleep this morning. "
Fred saw in Ed's eyes the chronic fatigue that inhabited the new father. This did not prevent him from making a coffee.
" It is not too difficult ?
Compared to some of my nights in the ER, this is a piece of cake. Except that in emergencies, it was exceptional whereas now it is daily. Will you take a muffin with it ?
Yes thanks. What about Mark ?
He works, he is the one who can take everything but I know that he was caught sleeping in his office in secret, and elsewhere too. "
Ed smiles, as does Fred.
" The little one is very demanding, but it is such a joy to have him with us now. "
Fred noticed the sadness behind those words. He knew it was because of the death of
their friend that his son was now in their care. Fred also knew that they also carried this death as a burden, believing that they had some responsibility in this tragedy while Fred saw no cause and effect.
« What about the hospital ?
Oh don't you know ? I no longer work there.
Really ?
Yes. I ended up cracking up. I needed a change. After the Grady sisters retired, I felt it was time to leave too. I enjoyed working there but I didn't have the strength to do it anymore. This job is tough, Fred. Not as much as the military one but it also scores. "
Fred understood that.
" One of their cousin agreed to take me on as a private nurse. Right now I'm part time because of you know who but when he's older I'll have a full time job. "
Fred listened attentively to Ed. The bear was always good advice and although they spoke little of him, Fred knew how to find advice for the future. Sam how to cry again from the first floor, Ed's new work day was about to begin. Fred stood up and greeted him, promising to come back before leaving to see Mark too.
Once outside, Fred hesitated. He wasn't sure where to go. Francis had moved to California. About Lorette, he knew she was in training in another state. Fred felt a short shiver in his back thinking about the young woman and her methods of seduction. However, he regretted his absence because the young woman was despite everything a friend to him.
The weather was getting a little cloudier, but the heat of the day remained. He decided to take a tour of the city. As he had told his parents, it was a farewell tour in his eyes. Due to his mother's illness and the departure of his father, he had lived in many cities over the years, without being able to settle down. Of all the towns and villages where he had put down his suitcase, this town, the last of his wandering, was the one that mattered the most to him. He would have liked to live there since his birth, finding the place pleasant and relatively peaceful. But his future life would be built elsewhere, he knew that. It would just be a place to visit for the holidays, and nothing more. His gaze was sometimes on the neighboring mountains, now virgin of snow in this hot season. The Buckeye mountain on one side, the Morse on the other were far away but still visible, their rocks covered with greenery standing out against the blue and white sky of the day.
Fred's footsteps slowly took him to the park. He entered through the gate without grilles, turning his head to see the children playing in the grass, parents watching them with their heads in a book or tablet. He continued towards a more wooded and discreet sector where empty benches awaited their occupants eager for shadows. No one was there at the moment and Fred took a seat, resting his back against the bench, rubbing the muscles of his sore legs. He had crossed the whole city up and down and once he was seated he realized how tired he was. He barely looked up when he saw his father approach, a small lunchbox in hand. John sat down next to him.
" It's nice to ask me to come here. It's nicer than the local pizzeria or eating in my office. "
Fred smiles, a little exhausted. He noticed a kiosk nearby and realized his hunger. He stood up, telling his father he was coming back soon. He kept his promise, a large sandwich and a cold beer in hand before resuming his seat.
" Yeah, I thought the weather was right for that.
- The setting is good, and we are quiet. "
John remembered something, grabbed his cell phone and cut the ringtone.
"They will know how to do without me for an hour. "
Fred smiled, biting into his sandwich.
" The day is going well ?
Yes, I had forgotten the distances a bit, but hey, a little walking never hurts.
Don't repeat this to your mother. She would be able to listen to you. I don't want to walk three miles to go to work ! "
Fred took a sip of the beer. John was chewing his share.
« It would do you good dad, you have a tendency to put on weight lately."
Fred was teasing. John noted it down.
« And you fear that I will become desirable to you ?"
Fred swallowed askance at his father's pike, staring at him with teary eyes.
« Oh, that's okay, I remember your net's history and I also noticed the way you had to discreetly watch big guys. You are hardly discreet, you know, when you know how to look at you. "
Fred blushes. He could only agree. It was a strange feeling to blush like a teenager, now that he had left that phase of his life far behind.
« Daddy, finally ! There are things that cannot be said, even if it is true ! "
Fred tried to pretend nothing had happened, going back to his meal. John looked around.
" It is a beautiful place.
I know. I sometimes came after school. It makes me weird to know that... I will not see this park again.
We don't chase you, you know that. You will always be welcome with us...
I know. But...
But ?
I am going to leave. For good this time. It's no longer for college, with return for vacation, or the military, with return for leaves. It's for good this time.
I know it. Your mother knows that too. It is the lot of every son to leave his family to found his own. You... We will be missed.
You too. You... Can you take care of this ? »
Fred pulled the plastic bag out of his pocket.
" I remembered I still had this, it was hidden in the sock drawer.
Is that your cannabis ?
Yes. Eight years old now, it can't be very effective anymore. I haven't needed it for a long time, can you throw it away for me ? I was so wrapped up in my next departure that I almost forgot I had it at home.
Consider it done... "
John opened the bag and scattered the dried herbs in the wind.
" I never understood the value of smoking. Including this thing. I'm glad you stopped shooting your lungs. "
John ignored the click he heard as he dispersed the cannabis. It was when he returned the empty bag to Fred that he saw it with a big lit cigar on his lips. He looked at him incredulously.
« What ? These are my lungs. And then I only smoke one a week. Well, in general.
It's your life... You're old enough to do what you want with it.
I still have to know what I want to do with it.
You want to talk about it ? "
Fred leaned down, his hands clasped between his thighs.
" I'm scared, dad...
Of ?
Of all... I... Am obliged to take sleeping pills otherwise I have nightmares. I don't know what I'll be doing in six months. Or I'll live in a year...
It's the big jump, yes...
I said I won't re-enlist, but in a way it would be the most reassuring for me.
I understand why.
But I won't. I almost died, dad. I'm not going to tempt fate a second time.
You see someone ?
Not this week, but in London I have sessions planned. Twice a week.
It should help you.
I hope so dad... I... Can't even cut my meat anymore...
Is that why you only ate vegetables yesterday ?
Yes. Holding a knife has become an impossible thing for me. I... I killed someone, dad. I stabbed him. I did it to save the life of one of my men. But I killed for it. And I still feel the blade going into his heart, daddy... "
Fred's voice rose in the treble as he looked at his hand. John could feel his son's breathing getting harder. He moved closer to him and put his arm over his shoulder.
" Calm down... It's over. You just need time to digest it. It's true, I have never had this experience. But I knew some soldier friends who had this happened. And to all of you, I can tell you that time has been a precious ally.
Is it true, dad ?
Yes. Their relatives helped them too.
Their relatives... I only have you.
You have your friends too.
I don't see them anymore. The ones I have left...Are not close enough to me. I lost a lot, you know. Because I told them I was gay. I lost others because I told them I was going to join the army. And over there... The best I've had are dead, dad... "
Fred couldn't help but cry.
" Don't worry, my son. You will meet other people.
I... Don't want to lose them...
Why would you lose them ?
Because I am fag. Because I was in so much pain when the others died. I am pitiful...
Certainly not... You just have your limits. As we all. And you have crossed some of them.
How to go back then ? "
Fred looked at his father, who was slowly and sadly shaking his head.
" You can't. Sad to say, but what's done is done. Your only way to get over it is to accept what you've lost. To mourn all of this. You have changed, Fred. You just have to rebuild yourself. This scares you, I understand that. But it is not by staying put that everything will work out. Your only chance, Fred, is to go. Believe me, you will meet people who will be very precious to you. You will have new experiences and before you even know it you will have left your burden behind. You won't forget, I won't lie to you. But you will learn not to think about it anymore.
It seems so easy...
It is not. It takes time, but you have your life ahead of you. You are only 23...
It is true...
It's the same for the rest. You will eventually meet a pretty boy... "
Fred started to blush.
« A guy who will take care of you, whom you will love. You will live with it and we, your parents, will wait for you to give your news once a year...
More often than that, I hope... And then you can also call, right ?
It is true.
Why would it always be up to children to give parents their news ? Can you explain that to me ?
No. In any case, know that getting into a relationship is one of the most important steps in a man's life.
I imagine. There are others ?
Yes. The day you become a father.
That one, I'll never know.
Don't bet on it...
Really ?
I know you'll never go with a woman, right ?
Absolutely.
But that's not the only way to become a father. Think about Mark and Ed...
You mean... Adopt a child ?
Yes. It will be a great step for you, I guarantee it.
Raise a child ? But daddy, I can barely take care of myself...
I'll let you in on a secret, Fred. The day your mother told me she was pregnant with you... I was the happiest of men. And also, I had a terrible urge to pack my bags and go forever...
It is true ?
Yes. I was scared. Fear of the unknown who presented himself before me. I quickly recovered. Afterwards, speaking with my friends, I learned that we all feel this way. We're cowards by nature, Fred. This is our great weakness. Those who tell you that one day you will know how to be ready to become a father are liars. This day does not exist. It is our great secret, to us men, and I am revealing it to you today : we are never ready to become fathers. It is our children who build us, who make us fathers. And not the other way around.
If this is true, then what have I brought you ? »
John was looking at his son, smiling.
" When I was younger, I was a real jerk. At first I didn't know what your mother found in me. It was after you came into the world that I understood that she had seen everything I was hiding, including from myself. I was a jerk and you forced me to grow up, Fred. To become responsible. I wasn't for myself, but when I took you in my hands the first time, I was so scared to feel you so small, so fragile, so dependent, that it forced me to grow up to take care of you. What I did on my own for the first four years of your life, you know, because of the leukemia that nearly killed my Daisy. Once fully healed, she resumed her place and subsequently had to take care of you alone while I worked to earn money to pay our debts and open this damn garage.
And me ? What do I have in me ?
Most of you know that already, Fred. You are strong, courageous, inventive, determined. You showed all of this by saving your men.
I was not alone, dad... They also worked to save themselves.
You were at their head and you didn't let them down. I never said you were a Superman. You have your limits, your faults. You are not perfect, and you don't have to be.
It is true.
Of course that is true ! In terms of faults, I am the champion, I am the first to admit it. You know that as well as I do. Do you remember the day you told me ?
Oh yes.
Since then, it's the third day of my life that I'm happiest. The first is when your mother told me she was pregnant. The second, the day you were born, when I knew you were a boy. Your mother wanted to be surprised, she refused to know on the ultrasound. I only dreamed of one thing, to have a son. So the third is when you told me you were gay. Finally, when you had the courage to tell me. I never told you, but I was starting to suspect it. "
Fred looked at his father questioningly.
" What do you mean ?
Fred, at 15, you had never had a girlfriend, and most importantly, you obviously weren't trying to get the girls in the neighborhood pregnant... Believe me, it's a sign.
It is true ?
Yes. Well, I doubted that when I saw the day before that you had been sneaking away. But we can't be right about everything...
True. Is there a fourth day ?
This is the one where you called me to tell me that you were alive. I have never been happier, except the day you came out. I wanted to ask you...
Yes ?
Was there a reason ? I mean, I knew your mom knew that before I did... Was there a reason you hadn't told me before ?
Mom advised me not to tell you the day I told her. I was embarrassed to hide it from you but at the same time it suited me.
Why that ?
I don't really know. You... Did not seem very gay-friendly to me...
Because of my friends, is that it ?
A little yes.
Guess I deserve this one. But hey since I think I showed what I was thinking, right ?
Yes, and that... Pleases me...
You are my son, Fred. I cannot act otherwise. But I am also sincere when I tell you that I am happy to see the handsome man that you have become. I know that is not the case for everyone.
Like your friends ?
Some do. You know Fred, I... I can no longer see some...
Why that ?
Knowing you homosexual made me change my opinion. I had never known one before. But some of my... relationships... Are not very friendly with.
I can imagine.
I didn't tell you but I also lost a lot of friends.
Because of me ?
No, because of them, from their point of view. Sometimes I even had to kick their asses, for good.
Cool.
Say, would you like to do it ?
What ?
Tomorrow your mom has her boring dance lessons. I think to drive her first, then we are going to drink between guys.
It would change my mind yes...
You'll put on your uniform, we'll show these idiots what a queer can do for a living, like fighting for his country and saving five straight asses...
A BB evening then...
A what ?
Beer and Brawl...
This is what can happen, yes.
I'm in !
It is true ?
It will do me good. I like the idea of kicking some homophobic asses quite a bit, it's been a while since I did. And I miss it, I must say... "
John was pleased to see that light rekindle in his son's eyes. it was still vague and weak, but it existed. All he had to do was help it grow a little taller. He had his attention focused on his watch then.
« Hey shit, I'm in a hurry now !"
John stood up, threw the wrappers in the trash, finished his beer before dropping the bottle in turn.
« Son, I have to go... See you tonight !"
Fred had just enough time to greet him before seeing him return to work. Staying where he was, he finished his drink then drowned the rest of his cigar in the bottom of the beer that was left before throwing everything away, rubbing his buttocks with all dust before looking around then leaving to finish his farewell tour to the city.
The sun was about to set when Fred walked back to his house. Finally, his parents' house. They were obviously in their room and Fred thought it was more prudent not to go up to see them. In case. He went into the already tidy kitchen and saw a note on the microwave "for tonight."
Fred opened the door and looked inside, taken aback. There he saw a plate of green beans and minced meat. More importantly, the plate was small, plastic. He took it, looked at it closely.
" But it's... "
He looked at the table. There was a colored plastic spoon and a glass. not an ordinary glass, but brightly colored plastic also with a white flower on it. The glass was closed by a lid with a small pouring spout. He looked at the plate again and saw under the vegetables the shape of the purple dinosaur he was a fan of as a child.
Fred saw and kept on his hand his childhood things. He must have been within 5 the last time he had used all of this.
He smiles frankly as he gazes up at the ceiling, his parents' bedroom just above the kitchen. That was all his father's humor. And he also loved the fact that they had kept such an element of his life.
For the first time in a long time, he ate with a good appetite.
-
John smirked, giving a last bow to his wife who was walking slowly towards the community center in her dark green pants and creamy white blouse. She answered the same before entering the building in the direction of her husband and her son who was standing next to him. John wore classic jeans and a tan polo shirt, Fred wore his blue dress uniform, crisp and still stiff from the iron.
« Where are we going ?
Hey, I don't really know. A quiet bar to start ? Oh, I have a better idea.
Which ?
Guess you know the gay bar around here, right ? "
Fred almost choked.
« But, uh, yeah... Why ?
- Son, I know all the bars here except this one. I told myself that for once... "
Fred was blushing and thinking fast.
« Dad, are you sure you want to go to such a place ?
And why not ? I'm a guy, I know how to defend myself !
Yes but if someone ... flirt with you ...
Ah yes, I know... But I don't know. This has never happened to me before... "
John scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.
" I don't know how I would react. But I don't know how it goes in there either. After all, it's primarily a bar, right ?
Essentially yes, but... Well, here or elsewhere... If things don't go well, we'll leave, ok ?
OK.
If some guy puts a hand on your butt, you don't hit him, okay ?
OK. "
This last reply came a little more slowly. Fred was worried. But on the other hand, he knew he was curious to return to the bar eight years after his last visit. And then his father was right, they could always leave. They got back in the car and Fred led his father to the Dirty Boots.
Arrived, John considered the entrance, recently repainted. Fred noticed the new neon lights, larger than the old ones.
« Fred, are these weird names for gay bars normal ?
Yes. In general, they refer to the type of guys you meet indoors and also to the general mood.
Is it selective, then ?
Yes, some are more so than others. "
Fred guided his father.
" But here, the last time I came, it was pretty open. "
The two men faced an imposing gorilla in dusty white marcel. He wore muddy leather pants and was barefoot. John looked at him a little curiously. If that was any indication of what was inside... John began to regret coming. Fred was looking at the gorilla. His uniform brought him to attention. Fred remembered his rank and returned him the salute.
« Wait, but I know you, don't I ? "
Fred could only agree.
« How have you been since then, Em ? "
John looked at his son. Did he know him then ?
Em looked at the soldier, trying to remember. Then he smiled and hugged Fred.
« Hey, but it's little Perez ! "
Fred blushed, looking at his father who was staring at him with his arms crossed.
" It has been years ! So like that, you really ended the ass in some soldier pants ! "
Fred couldn't say otherwise.
« Time to serve and no more, Em ! And you ?
- Ah, the same ! Six years with the colors and then the discharge, the American passport and everything than goes with it ! "
Em was showing his finger adorned with a gold wedding ring, a big smile on his lips. Fred was happy for the gorilla, trying to distract from his father's disapproving gaze.
" It's doubly awesome !
You said it. Right after I was sworn in, Matt dropped to a knee and proposed to me. Like that, in the room, in front of all the naturalized people of the day. We then changed rooms for the formalities and the same evening, I was Emiliano Stone.
Oh did you take his name ?
Yes, I didn't want to keep anything from Belize. Barely my first name. But I like it so I kept it. "
Em then moved to the side and opened the door for the two men. Fred looked at his father who hesitated, then he entered. Fred greeted the gorilla one last time before following his father.
John looked around. Once through the door, he found himself in a short hallway at the end of which was a large hall. Loud country music was coming out. He noticed the strong musky smell of the place, something that allowed him to differentiate the place from a classic bar. Fred walked alongside, avoiding his gaze.
« Perez, eh ? "
Fred sneered.
" Yes I remember being surprised when I opened the envelope too.
So you've ... been here long before, haven't you ?
Dad, you won't make me believe you waited until you were 21 before you went to party ! "
John avoided his son's gaze. Fred realized he was right, chuckling all the more.
" I've had my share of trouble here too, Dad, but to be honest, I've never regretted coming. "
John understood the hint. Fred continued to advance, he followed him to enter the main room.
For Fred, it was like he remembered it. The tables filled with more or less dressed men. He blushed a little, wondering what his father might think when he saw this areopagus of large, muscular adults, some with nothing, others embracing tenderly on the more distant and more discreet benches. The track was occupied by phony cowboys who swayed on the music. No doubt it was a theme party. Fred remembered with dread the monthly brown evenings, which he had always been keen to avoid. John continued his stride towards the bar. Fred followed, recognizing the large bull seen in his teens.
Yes, it was him. Iiniwa. Since the time, he got muscular, he displayed a look and a more assertive personality, still the bare chest tucked in his leather harness. Fred could also swear his scent was stronger too. John was smiling.
« Fred, you are drooling ..."
The latter then tried to regain control of himself under the mocking gaze of his father who went to the other side of the counter, far from the bull but close to the powerful rhino that Fred also recognized.
Matt. He hadn't changed much either, still being so attractive, his chest still thick, tucked into his white jersey. His hair was shorter and whiter too, his beard still short but frankly white now, still with his construction chains around his neck and wrist. Fred quickly found his wedding ring on his left hand.
" Hey dude. Can we have two beers please ? "
John's voice showed his resolve and newfound confidence.
« Right now dude ! "
Matt's voice was still so sultry. As long as he doesn't say too much ! Fred walked over too.
" Hi Matt ! "
The rhino looked the soldier up and down before reacting.
" Hey Fred ! What a surprise !
I see the years have not been wasted here !
You said it ! Are you with this guy ? Your taste for dads has not changed it seems ! "
John nearly choked on the beer. Fred was blushing like never before.
" I'm just passing through. "
He put a hand on John's shoulder.
" This is my father. We spend the evening together ! "
His voice was loud and hinted at a great deal, "Avoid saying too much about what happened between us, will you ? » Underlyed. Matt understood it.
" That's cool ! "
Matt extended a strong hand to John, who squeezed it.
" I'm Matt. It's rare to see a father come here with his son. Well, married and supposedly straight guys, there's no shortage of them. But never in this context. "
John guessed it.
" I imagine it's less rare than a high school student here. "
Fred didn't know where to look.
" Who knows ? The house has a strict policy. But it has become impossible to guess an age now. And then we don't force anyone to come here. So go and prevent a kid from doing whatever goes through his mind or his undies once he has decided to do it... "
John had to agree. Fred was trying to focus on his beer, wondering how to get out of the situation.
" I can't imagine what my kid might have in mind later. "
Fred eyed Matt curiously, which John did not miss.
" A kid ? Do you have a child ? "
Matt smiles proudly, pulling out his cell phone and showing pictures of an infant, his horn barely out of his nose, resting against the side of a female rhino. John was also watching the child curiously.
" My little Keith. Don't be surprised Fred, I never hid my bisexuality here. "
Matt looked at his son tenderly.
" He was not planned in the scenario. A friend asked me if I wanted to make a kid out of her lesbian daughter. Em knows that, of course. I think he will be a good uncle for him.
He's a pretty baby anyway.
Yes. Because of him I had to leave my apartment above the bar. You see Fred, this is no place to raise a child. I bought an house for us in a quiet suburb. Iiniwa took over the lease of the apartment. "
Fred watched in horror as his father picked up his phone and selected the photos he in turn showed to Matt, who smiled back.
« Hey, how old was your kid there ? "
- Oh, six months, no more. He was a chasm at the time. He drank the bottles on the chain and then, I'll let you imagine ! "
Fred wanted to escape. Since the invention of the cell, no one was immune to the torture session of two fathers comparing photos of their young children with them. Fred tried to distract himself by looking around the room behind him.
A second set of beers appeared on the counter as Matt and John continued to chat. Fred felt a bit left out to be honest, but he found it amusing to see these two strangers chatting after finding such a commonality.
« Fred, the man is asking you something ! "
John's loud voice pulled Fred out of his reverie.
« Uh yes, what ?
- Do you have someone right now ? "
Fred blushed, shaking his head. Matt was still curious, it seems.
" No no, I don't see anyone at the moment.
- Ah, too bad, such a beautiful boy like you ! Finally, if you come back here one day, I hope for the singles of the area that you will still be in the market ! "
Matt was all smiles, John too, sitting with his beer in hand. Fred let himself be gently contaminated by the good humor of the two men and ended up sitting down to enjoy the evening.
Slowly, Fred found himself enjoying the evening. He guessed that the buildup of beers in his stomach had something to do with it, resting his chin on his wrist while his dad and Matt continued to chat barely interrupted by new customers. It was a weeknight and the bar night was probably going to end relatively early. Iiniwa greeted his boss before going back to his new apartment as the clients left, alone or as a couple. Or to several. John affected to ignore the thing and what followed. He sometimes looked around him. Then Em came to kiss his husband before leaving in turn, his service finished.
« Are you looking for something, man ? "
Matt and John had already crossed the threshold of the Fellowship Door.
" I was looking at the place. It's a superb bar, lots of space ...
Yeah, that's the reason I moved here after the Wrangler burnt in Denver. The rents are cheaper there and frankly, the population is not lacking. It takes organization, of course, and accommodations too to attract customers. But I drain my customers from a good part of central Colorado while at Wrangler I only had regulars from the city !
That's a lot of people !
You have no idea. In any case, in recent years, it has enabled me to redo the... "
Matt looked at Fred.
" The adjoining rooms. And I also changed to bigger TVs, it's more convenient for games. "
A warning signal flashed in Fred's head.
" Oh, are you broadcasting games ?
- Yes. Football, Baseball, basketball and others too. Only men's competitions ! "
Fred was not surprised and somewhere, neither was John. Fred took the opportunity to get up and go to the bathroom.
« Hey Fred, do you want to give me a hand ?
Yes what ?
Can you take a walk in the back ... the downstairs room ? The new cameras are not yet installed and I want to know if everyone is gone. "
Fred breathed as he heard Matt catch up. He looked at his father who showed his ignorance. Or feigned it. Fred, anyway, turned towards the stairs leading into the backroom. John looked at him before getting up too.
" Might as well take the opportunity to take a piss too. »
Matt stayed at the counter, wiping off the last few glasses, casually adding a
« I recommend the cabins on the left. "
which John ignored at the time. The toilets were easy to find and John was not surprised to find only rooms intended for men. Inside, the freshly redone concrete showed wet spots. At the back, near the urinals, two lions were entwined, their pants down and their hands wandering. John grimaced and tried to ignore the thing, heading for the cabins on the right. He pushed open the door and turned around to go to the cabins on the left which seemed more to his liking.
Fred himself had come back up.
" Where is dad ?
In the bathroom, he will come back, don't worry.
In the toilet ? "
Fred was worried. Matt understood why.
« Don't worry, he's big enough to defend himself. "
Fred didn't get a chance to answer, John was coming back. He returned to his seat at the counter, looking at the bottles.
« Dude, thanks for the advice ..."
Fred guessed the reason. John looked at him, then Matt.
« Your beers are good but I need something stronger now..."
Matt smiled, showing the palm of his hand his reserves lined up against the wall.
" A preference ?
MMmmfff... Tequila !
Dad, are you okay ? "
Fred was surprised. His father hardly ever drank strong alcohol.
« I just need to erase things from my memory ...
Ah ...
Note one thing. This is not the first time that I have seen a couple climbing on each other in a toilet. And I've seen bigger glory holes in Costa Rica. "
Fred noted that his father therefore knew the concept. John seemed to notice his mental remark.
" What do you think ? That we too, straights, don't know how to let us go from time to time ? "
Matt chuckled to him, opening a bottle and placing two glasses on the counter.
« But don't take it the wrong way, seeing two guys doing it together, it makes me weird anyway. "
Fred could understand it and Matt didn't take offense either, pointing to the bottle.
" Milenario Extra ? Man, why didn't you showed me that this first ? "
John seemed to be enjoying it, handing out his empty glass frantically, his eyes gleaming with envy. It didn't take long for the first sip to be emptied into his throat. John stared at the empty glass, offering it for a second drink. Fred didn't know if he should be happy or worried about his father.
« Hey Matt, don't you mind if I come back here every now and then ? "
Fred almost swallowed his last drink of beer askew.
" Hey, why not ? It's a place for guys, you're a guy ...
And I'm a sports fan and my wife refuses to buy a giant screen so ...
So you're welcome, man.
Cool. But don't get confused... "
Fred was stunned. John saw him, patting him friendly on the shoulder.
" Son, I'm not queer, nor bi, and I don't want to see guys doing stuff naked or even try. But this place is cool, the vibe is great, they have great beer and great giant screens so I will definitely come back once in a while ! "
Fred could hear his father's voice loading up on alcohol. Perhaps his words were dictated by his intoxication. But Fred felt he was going to have to imagine his father going to a gay bar on a regular basis.
This simple idea made him sit down at the counter, clasp his head in his hands before pushing his empty glass aside.
« A triple, please... "
When he opened his eyes, Fred first felt a severe headache. And a certain discomfort. His bed was so hard. He couldn't remember sleeping on such a hard bed before. Feeling the mattress, he realized that there was none. Just two long, disjointed boards. As for the pillow on which his head rested, he winced when he saw that it was his father's thighs, sitting on the bench.
But where was he ?
Fred felt his clothes soaked in sweat, good to wash. The ceiling was off-white concrete, and the walls were painted concrete blocks. Turning his head, Fred saw the white bars and the steel door. His stomach leapt in his throat.
" That...
- First time behind bars ? "
His father's voice was thick and slow. He must have had a headache too. Fred didn't know how they ended up here anymore. John was sitting there, a thin smile on his lips, his eyes closed, his head erect against the wall.
« If you could breathe more slowly and silently..."
Fred sat down next to John, looking around, a terrible taste in his mouth.
« How did we end up here daddy ?"
- Do you think I remember that ? I have a vague memory of a bottle dancing between us but afterwards... "
The sound of a door opening caused him to stop, followed by a distant conversation that drew closer.
" Really ? I saw you older than that.
- No no, really. But weight training adds five more years to me. "
A deep, masculine voice had answered the first feminine voice.
« What about your wife ? How much she still have ?
Five months. Suffice to say that we are both impatient to see her finally arrive.
Oh is that a girl then ?
Yes ! It was my dream. It took only two tries ! "
The two speakers stopped in front of the bars. Fred felt ashamed to see his mother accompanying the big black bull who inserted a key in the lock. He looked at the two men and motioned for Fred to come over. Without really understanding, Fred stood up. John stood up too and walked over to the gate but the jailer put a strong hand on his chest, shaking his head.
« Not you, dude ! "
Fred wanted to protest but Ken was adamant and Daisy pulled her son by the sleeve to get him out.
« But, honey..."
She smiles, shaking her head. Fred wanted to speak but his gaze dissuaded him from opening his mouth. She smiled at Ken who was closing the sobering-up cell.
" Thank you. You can let him go tomorrow morning. The lesson will bear, I think. "
Fred tried to defend his father, but his mother's dry and direct tone made him understand that it was a waste of time.
" There is a big difference between how you treat your child and how you should treat your spouse. You will understand it one day, I hope. "
Then she walked away. Fred stammered a "sorry" to his father before following her. Neither of them turned when John gripped the bars, pleading with a last
" Honey... "
plaintive before finding himself alone.