The reluctant demon Pt1

Story by TheFieldmarshall on SoFurry

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#1 of Hell Afterlife Services

Before Anar Warlock was a mildly incompetent general, he was a deliberately incompetent demon. Forced into a career he didn't want and determined to return to the mortal world at any cost he's given a glimmer of hope when an innocent young demonologist summons him to her circle.


The reluctant demon

It wasn't that she had expected demon summoning to be easy, just that she hadn't anticipated cocking it up so royally on her first solo attempt. I mean, it is a Dark Art after all and absolutely not suitable for beginners, but with a few of the Advanced Studies of Magick scrolls under her belt she was confident in her ability to follow detailed instructions. This whole mess has started with a boy; he was a very attractive boy that she had the serious hots for and he wanted to join the Demonology Department as a Fiend Forensic, using underworld minions to solve mortal crime cases. So he'd signed himself up for summoning class with professor Epsom, beginning with the basics as everyone does. She had followed along all starry-eyed, not really interested in the subject but wanting to take every chance conceivable to talk or interact with him. After four whole weeks of learning candle placement, pentagram protocol and painting her nails black, she had been given her own summoning scroll to use for her homework assignment. It was easy; read the runes, call the name of the desired underling and order them to do your bidding. Demons were a dangerous bunch: untrustworthy, grotesque, tricky and emotionally unstable. But if you got it all right they were very, very powerful indeed and you could make quite a name for yourself with one by your side. Making an error could result in your soul being devoured or damaged or worse still an absolute bollocking off of professor Epsom in front of the entire class. There were only a few demons suitable for summoning at beginner level and most of them had already been encountered during lessons under supervision so there shouldn't be any surprises. Well. The pentagram on the floor had been carefully measured and drawn out with official grade 2 charcoal, runes had been copied meticulously from the hand book and her candles were happily dripping wax all over her wooden bedroom floor. That was going to be a pain to clean up. The outfit she had chosen for today was suitably gothic and the summoning scroll was tried and tested, she'd used it before successfully in lessons so it wasn't that which was at fault here. She exhaled slowly, why, why why? Clearing her throat she repeated her question as the demon had completely ignored her and was looking around her room curiously, eating its sandwich, "I said, which of the basic starter demons are you?"

He blinked, "I'm not, so spare me the latin."

Panic started to set in, "but I used my textbook scroll! So you must be a training demon."

"Don't ask if you're not going to listen," he replied flatly, "I'm a data clerk." The tall grey winged creature flipped a wrist, checking its watch, "and I'm on my break, so if you're quite finished I best get back before I get an earful off Crowley."

"I was meant to get Amaimon," she complained, shoulders sagging.

"Amaimon? Mr. Spaghetti? That idiot?" his interest was piqued, long ears picking up, "what did you want him for? Tickles?"

She stifled a giggle, "I need fiend fyre," she explained, "in this jar." Holding out an old jam jar with half the label still attached she watched as the mysterious demon snapped his fingers and a bright blue flame glowed within the glass vessel.

"Easy peasy. Even my cat could do it," he smiled, dark grey eyes shining mischievously. "I really do have to go now, though."

Her eyes widened, "thank you so much! I'm sorry to have disturbed you."

"Not at all. Here's my card," he gave a nod of his head and a small black square materialised on the floor by her feet, "call me for your next assignment if you like. Noodle features is useless."

"That's very, um," she tried not to say 'nice', it wouldn't do to go around calling underworld minions 'nice', or 'kind' for that matter. Generous? No, no. "Anyway," she picked up the card, "Anar, I will thanks."

He fidgeted in the pentagram "you have to dismiss me, yes?"

"Oh! Yes! Sorry!" she closed the connection, flustered. As the candles snuffed themselves out she was left standing in the dark, her only light the eerie blue glow emanating from the jar in her palm.

That had been a disaster alright. Still, her homework was done. Best not mention it to the professor, much too embarassing. She'd get it right next week.

Her next class went without incident. The work she produced was flawless and her jar sat with the others on the workbench, indistinguishable from the flames of the other student's demons. She returned home with a new task.. She should really summon the correct demon this time, she knew, but the data clerk had been so... friendly. That smile he had flashed her was quite charming, in a weird animal hybrid sort of way. Amaimon was an absolute horror. They all were. Quite why she kept up these classes was a mystery as the boy she was after had paid no attention to her at all whatsoever and was busy chasing tail that was much prettier than hers. She hadn't even learned the guy's name. A funny looking donkey demon was as good as she was probably going to get at this rate and that smile had been cute it had to be said.

Taking a deep breath she read from the scroll. Dark mist swirled from the pentagram and a pair of grey wings unfurled. "Hello," he smiled.

She drew a sharp breath. He wasn't in a shirt and tie today. He was wearing a tight pair of black jeans and nothing else. She felt herself blush a little, "I hope I haven't disturbed you? Again," she added."

"Nah, not today. I'm out of the office. I can stay a little longer with you if you like."

His gaze was piercing. Was... was he flirting? This was an unexpected turn! "That would be nice," she gulped.

"Great! Ok, what can I do for you?"

She explained her homework task.

"Oh yeah, no problem," Anar shrugged, "this is all very basic stuff you're covering." He waved a grey clawed hand and the bundle of dead stems in her hand bloomed back to life.

She idly wondered what he considered 'not basic'. It was all pretty amazing to her and she'd done advanced magick. "So what can't you do then? Because if this is all so easy for you then I don't need to summon anyone else."

Anar folded his muscular arms and sniffed pridefully, "not much. I may only be a data clerk but I'm a high level demon I'll have you know."

She found herself looking at him from top to bottom; he really was rather attractive in a forbidden sort of way. Long slender ears, big bright eyes, snuffly... snout? When she first started classes she'd expected goats or goblins and so far all she'd actually encountered were eldritch cosmic horrors. This one was nice to look at.

"Why would you want anyone else anyway?" he asked with a very suggestive grin, as though he had read her mind. Could he do that? She started blushing again. "I'm easier on the eye than all of those other misfits."

She wanted to take a step back, her shyness creeping in, but she couldn't. She was frozen, almost enchanted by him. Demon summoning wasn't meant to be like this! There were no chapters in the text books dedicated to 'sexy fiends and how to resist them'. Well, not at her level anyway, "avaunt!' she growled. It was worth a try.

Anar just chuckled, "won't work on me, I'm not controlled by basic commands. Anyway that's a bit rude, avaunt-ing me, I'm only doing your flipping homework for you."

She knew she should just send him back and forget about him before this all went terribly wrong but, oh but, those eyes and that smile. Impish. That was the word. The body wasn't bad neither.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" he asked, "you never been... tempted before?"

No, she hadn't! This was the kind of trouble that messing about with the wrong sort of hell denizens got you. She was an inexperienced young female demonologist and that made her a perfect target for a hungry demon looking for an easy soul munching. Wait, wasn't there an actual class of demon that fulfilled mortals sexual desires? "I know what you are!" she snapped, triumphantly, "you're one of those fiends that eats souls while you shag people, aren't you?" she felt very pleased to have figured him out so quickly but his brow only furrowed in confusion.

"You think I'm a succubus? You know they're all female, right?"

Ah drat, maybe not then.

"I'd just like to have a little fun with you, that's all," he continued, his soft voice filling her ears, "Don't you want to have a little fun?"

It was a good question. "Well maybe," she said slowly, "but you can't leave the enchanted circle within the pentagram, can you?"

"True, true. Oh but," he rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "there is such a thing as roaming priviledges , if you can get your hands on a copy of that incantation then," he locked eyes with the innocent demonology student, "I can walk right out of your chalky prison, just step right over the threshold and go wherever you want," his eyes darted to her bed in the corner, "and do whatever you like."

Right, she thought, I definitely mustn't have sex with a demon, that's just common sense. But her sensible reasoning didn't reach her lips, "I'd like that very much," she heard herself say.

Anar grinned, "me too."

"So I just ask my professor for the scroll on roaming priviledges?"

Grey ears pricked up, "are you mental? You'll get kicked off the course faster than you can say 'shit'."

She was taken aback, "oh but-"

"What you need to do," he interrupted firmly, "is go to your college library and browse the reference section. It's very easy, just look for 'roaming' in the index. You seem like a smart girl. You can look in some books, can't you?" he nodded his head and she felt hers nodding too. He had her wrapped around his little talon. "You don't want to be lonely forever, do you? Just one simple piece of parchment and you can have some real company."

She caught her breath, "I'm not lonely," she insisted weakly.

"No?" the demon raised an eye, amused.

"Ok, maybe I am. A bit. But I know you're asking me to do something that I really shouldn't! You demons are all troublemakers."

He shrugged, his wings rustling drily, "we're a lot of things. Just like mortals. That professor of yours doesn't know the half of it, believe me. I can teach you things that are guaranteed to get the attention of your... classmates."

That look again. Did he know about the boy she fancied? Was any of what he had said even true? You couldn't trust a fiend. Yet the chance to learn demonology from an actual real demon was an opportunity she would be crazy to pass up. "Priviliges, yes? Roaming ones? Ok," she sighed, "I'll see what I can do. But no promises."

"Of course, of course. Take your time." He was almost succeeding at pretending to be cool and collected but she could tell he was actually rather excited that she was complying with his request. He was fidgeting on his clawed feet within the circle and his ears were flickering back and forth.

"I suppose I'd better let you go then, you've got stuff to do I suppose?"

Anar thought for a moment, "no not really. My flatmate's cooking dinner, the laundry's been done. Oh I've got to feed the cat."

"Whoa, wait, what now?' she laughed in disbelief. He'd mentioned a cat before and she'd dismissed it, "flatmates? Cat?" she waved her arms, "demons have pets?"

Anar gave her a sharp look, "there's more to me than a pair of horns you know. Maybe if we get to know each other... anyway if you can help me spend more time up here I'll reward you with some high magick knowledge."

She couldn't hide her interest now, her eyes lit up.

"I knew you'd like that, advanced studies of magick was your last class, wasn't it, Ember?"

Ok, this was too much! "How did you know that? How did-"

"I'm administration, sweetheart, remember? I can find out... almost anything." he checked himself, blinking, "let's see, you're a twenty two year old half-elf mortal from fifth dimension Earth living in Droughtfield. Nice area," he whipped out a smartphone and began scrolling, "you're single with a crush on a boy in your class. He's a tosspot, just saying. Sexual orientation unknown..." he gave her a smouldering look and she stammered, uncomfortably, "but from the eyes you've been giving me I'm taking it you're into guys. Even grey ones with big ears and pointy tails. Am I right?"

She looked away, flustered. He'd learned some rather personal things about her and appeared to want to know more. He knew she was thinking naughty thoughts about him and, well frankly he was encouraging it. 'A little fun' he had said. She needed to think about this.

"I can give you my number," he said, breaking her line of thought and giving his device a little shake, "I can say 'good morning' and 'goodnight' to you Ember."

No! Absolutely do not under any circumstances give a demon your phone number! "that would be lovely," she whispered. It had been so long since someone had cared about her. But could a demon really care? There was certainly something a little odd about him fiend-wise. He wasn't your typical garden variety minion. A smiley face popped up on her screen, lighting up the bedside table with a happy yellow glow. It was time now to dismiss him and have a panic attack over everything that had happened so far. The black mist evaporated, the candles snuffed out and she was left all alone in her room once more.

She sat shakily on the bed. What had she gotten herself into now? Why was she so skilled at finding herself in these ridiculous situations? She should have said 'no' to the roaming thing, should have dismissed him straight after he'd completed her task. Shouldn't have called upon him at all and then none of these conflicting feelings would be bothering her. He was into her, she was into him, he was an underworld worker and she was a hippy dippy half-elf. He'd had the cheek to go looking her up on the mortal database. Wait. Didn't that work both ways? She should check the demon database for him! Find out exactly what she was dealing with.

That next class came round quickly, time didn't pass so slowly now that she had Anar's texts to look forward to, from the 'Good morning's' and 'Sleep tight's' to the 'How are you?'s and kisses. She presented her resurrected blooms, took notes and practised fiend control on a poor level one summoned who didnt seem to be all there in more ways than one. None of this would work on her Anar, of course. He said he was a high level demon (if he'd been telling some semblence of truth which was doubtful). She wondered what class of demon he was. Maybe she'd find out later in the library. Epsom still believed she was using Amaimon for her solo summonings and the funny thing was she'd never actually set eyes on him. Only one sketch in a textbook of a big eye and lots of tentacles. 'Mr. Spaghetti', Anar had called him. How long she could get away with not following instructions only time could tell. That was a problem for another day. She packed up her books and headed for the library. She'd been rather pleased to discover she hadn't so much as glanced at the attractive boy all class. She had, however, thought of her mysterious data clerk and his tight black jeans. She was still thinking about him as she crossed campus and took the steps into the ancient building. The plan was to grab a PC while it was quiet and then when there were enough students around to mingle in with, she'd lift up her cloak hood and slip into the advanced reference section. With one finger she carefully typed in her student login details and opened the demonology applications folder.

Search: Anar

Accessing demon database...

1 result found

Really? That was surprising! Demon names being as they were. Four letters like that should have brought up hundreds of possibilities.

A link in blue:

Anarchy Motherfuckin Warlock

What in damnation was going on there?! She clicked it. A screen she had never seen before appeared.

Classified. Admin Login required.

She sat open-mouthed, "oh what?" You had to be underworld admin to look him up? Was he really that high status? He'd turned up on his break eating a sandwich! Even Beezlebub was accessible and he was inner circle. Fine, she sulked, books it was. She looked to the far metal shelving that marked the advanced literature. It was still too quiet, someone might spot she didn't belong there. Hmm. Clicking on the Tome Reference application she typed in 'Roaming'.

Accessing Tome Reference..

5 results found

This was more like it!

Roaming spirit - no.

Roaming ghoul - no

Roaming devil - no

Roaming charges for the underworld - what? No! Was that even a thing?

Roaming pass prices for the 9 circles - oh this was useless.

The problem was most likely her low-level clearance. There were books here containing extremely powerful sigils and charms but she wouldn't know about them because the system had on file that she was a novice student. She needed higher clearance or she needed to physically flick through every damned edition she could get her dainty hands on. This fiend of hers had better be worth all this trouble. She remembered the way he'd glanced at her bed with that hunger in his dark eyes. Yeah, he was worth it. She'd risk getting into a tiny bit of trouble for sexy times. It had been so long after all. I bet he's an absolute animal in the sheets. Best not think about this too much, I've a sneaking suspicion he can see a little into my head. Nothing for it but to sneak into the advanced literature section and hope she looked inconspicuous. It was slow going flicking to the appendix and looking under R and then putting the tome back to start all over again. She made sure her hood was up enough to cover her curled ears. Wouldn't do for her classmates to see her here. She wasn't particularly liked as it was, being a half breed. She'd tucked her student ID into her top too for good measure. After a while a shadow fell over her and she froze, cold air causing the hairs to stand up on the back of her neck. All the librarians were ressurecteds and they weren't known for their patience. The library was closing. She nodded and exited hurriedly. Well that had all been a huge waste of time. Her phone dinged, the screen lit up ' hey hows u?' I'm a bit frustrated, actually, she thought, and I'm missing you a little bit, that's how I am.

She reached home but didn't prepare the circle or light any candles. Instead she lounged around drinking coffee and feeling sorry for herself. Her phone lit up again. Drat, she'd forgotten to actually answer him, hadn't she. ' u ok?' No, I'm far from ok thanks very much. Everything she'd tried to do had failed, it was all above her level. She was in way over her head and if advanced magick had taught her anything it was not to fuck about with stuff you didn't understand. Stupid demonology. She should have stayed with her old tutor and class, they'd been alright instead of this bunch of muppets. ' No I'm not alright. No luck in the library ,' she replied.

' Not surprised tbh ,' he typed. Well why suggest it in the first place if you don't think it's going to work?! Ugh MEN! ' did you try tome ref?' No, of course not, I was throwing random books off the shelf and hoping OF COURSE I TRIED THAT. She simply replied, ' yes'.

' u gon summon me or wat?'

She was a little taken aback. Was he a bit thick? She hadn't got the necessary spell to release him from the pentagram, he was going to be stuck inside there again. ' Maybe we should just forget about this?'

' No!'

A pause.

'I miss u. I just wanna c u again'

Aww, how sweet. Her heart thumped. Yes his texting style was a little irritating but you couldn't have it all. He'd missed her!

They agreed on five minutes so she got straight to work preparing her room and deciding on what to wear. He'd looked so damn sexy half dressed with his body on display, she could put in a little effort too. She'd never prepared a circle so quickly, the professor would be proud! She scurried about throwing clothing out of her closet haphazardly. There must be something cute to choose from! Settling on a black lace dress she stood and took a breath, reciting the incantation easily without needing the scroll; maybe she was ready to move up a class?

Black mist rolled. Wings unfurled. Anar grinned. She wished she could reach out and touch him. His black work shirt was half open and she would have given anything to take it off completely, to feel that deliciously firm body beneath.

"Hey," she smiled.

"Hey. You look nice," he leered back.

Blush! "Oh thank - thank you," she stammered. Compliments were a rare treat, "you look good too."

"Heh. I wore these last time," he pulled at his tight black jeans, "and you seemed to like them." he turned round, "they make my butt look good too, right?"

Ok so today we've hit the ground running, she thought, amused by his wiggling hips.

"I'm still not used to having the tail sticking out the top of the waistband though," he sighed, "it is a bit uncomfortable."

Wait, what? "Your tail?"

"Yeah. Didn't always have that you see, nor the wings or horns."

What was he gabbling on about now?

"Tell you what," he continued, oblivious to her confusion, "wanna know something really cool and awesome about me?"

She was lost. "Why are you so complicated?" she blurted, "I thought you'd be angry at me for not getting that roaming scroll, I have to say."

"Angry?" he looked a little offended, "I'm never angry. Well I do get cross at other demons but... never at mortals. I could certainly never be angry at such a sweet thing as you." He gave her one of his looks.

That was a relief! Demons were known for their quick tempers. "Go on then, what's this cool thing you want to tell me?" It's probably something idiotic knowing this one.

"I'm a tenth level 'turned'." There was a pause. "I'll be as honest as a demon can be and say I'm a little disappointed at your lack of reaction," he snapped.

He's a what?

"You know your classes right? Demon classification?" he prompted impatiently.

"W-well yes; I know summoned and underlings, higher fiends, succubi, dark mages," she had to think a little, "nightcrawlers, resurrecteds, transphereals, true demons, archfiends... that's it I think."

Anar blinked, "and you've never heard of the turned?"

"No," she admitted, "sorry." He looked a little upset, obviously he'd meant to impress her and it had fell flat. "So you're tenth level? I mean, that is very powerful" she said trying to fix the awkward situation as best she could, "you said you were high level and I did think you were lying, after you'd turned up on your lunch break and everything."

"Do you know I haven't actually lied to you about anything. I'm not bound by foul oaths."

Her mouth made a 'oooooh' sound. It was like having an angel tell you they weren't bound by the ten commandments. Today was full of surprises. He seemed pleased to have got her interest and attention. "Care to tell me exactly how that's possible?" she asked.

He rubbed his snout slowly, "a 'turned'," he began, "is a living graduate of the Infernal Holy College-"

Now her pulse began to race. She'd seen that place mentioned once or twice in certain textbooks.

"-meaning that I was once a mortal just like you until I passed through the abyssal gate. Now I'm connected to both planes, the realms of the living and the dead. So I'm not bound nor damned and when my contract is fulfilled I'll return to the land of the living."

"And when you come back, you'll be a returned?"

"Yeah," he grinned, "like a piece of lost post."

Her mind raced. She'd read about the returned in an old out of print advanced magick book. Advanced magick... "Oh my god!" She was so stupid sometimes! It had been right there on the computer screen clear as day. His name. Warlock. You didn't get a name like that because it sounded neat. You got a name like that because you were from a magical bloodline. He was a tenth level warlock turned.

"Ember? Hello?" he waved a clawed hand in front of her face.

"You mentioned high magick. You said you could teach me and for some reason I didn't twig. Well I am just a beginner but I studied magick last year and I know that demons can't use that sort of power," she took a step towards the circle. "I know exactly what you are," she jabbed a finger at him triumphantly.

"Sure," he scoffed, "last time it was a succubus."

Sarah knew all about warlocks, how they couldn't create their own power only magnify it, that's why they used demons who supplied them with the mana they needed. They took the raw energy from their minions and made it greater to accomplish amazing things. Anar was his own master and servant, "you're a demon warlock; you can magnify your own inner magick! You're both a power source and an accelerator. Bloody hell."

He paled, his ears flattening, "fuck. I actually thought you were a bit dippy when we first met. Seems I underestimated you."

"Ha! You and me both."

"You're not going to tell anyone any of this though are you?" he asked pleadingly.

A crafty smile spread on her lips, "oh? No-one else knows? You'll get in trouble with the inner circle or something?"

He shook his head, "not that. They'll promote me and I like it in my admin position, I'm left alone. My job isn't a sort after one you see so I'm ignored. I go in, do my bit and sod off again, it's great. If Hastur or someone knew they had a warlock turned on the team I'd be... useful," he shuddered.

She'd thought she was confused a while back, turns out she had just been mildly perplexed and now she was confused. "You don't want to be useful, or promoted? You're immensely powerful but you're happy in admin?"

"I'm actually data entry. It's my job to make the demon database you use. I spend all day mis-spelling names and messing up everyone's files as I update them. Deliberately, I might add. I've done it for a while, started as a kind of hobby when I had a spare five minutes and a grudge but now I just fuck it up full time. Sometimes upper management will spot one of my mistakes and submit a ticket but on the whole nobody checks up on me, I'm a turned so I'm trusted. As trusted as a fiend gets anyway."

"Is that why your middle name is 'motherfuckin'?"

He grinned a huge grin, sharp teeth gleaming, "yeah! I thought it was funny. Did you look me up?"

"It said I needed admin login," she sulked, "so I couldn't."

"Oh I forgot I'd locked it. Prying eyes and all that. Anyway, what's your homework this time sweetheart?"

"Just some reading. Don't change the subject, while you're trapped in my circle I want to know more about you. Like, what did you look like before you turned into a demon donkey?"

He wheezed, "a what? I've always looked like this," he brushed his hands up and down, "except the added bits, but I told you that. And you don't seem to mind, do you? You'd love to get your hands on me. Mouth too I bet."

It was true. She wanted to touch him, stroke those long ears, feel his strong arms wrap around her and kiss his adorable face. Her averted eyes told him all that and more.

"Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting frisky with you neither. Oh! I had an idea about the roaming permissions. Listen, sometimes I have these great ideas that even I surprise myself with. What if I whip you up a master login for the computer? It won't stay active for long before someone gets wind of an unauthorised access but it will work just long enough for you to hunt down that spell. I'd really like to spend more time up here. We could go for coffee together. I miss good coffee. I miss lots of things. Wouldn't it be nice for us to really get to know each other?"

"You already know plenty about me," she scoffed playfully.

"Not the kind of things I was thinking of. Yeah you need blush. I'll text you the login username and password, you do the rest. I can't access literature my end or I wouldn't be in this situation." His expression darkened.

"Situation?"

He quickly recovered, smiling again, "oh yeah, well, if I could check the books I could copy the incantation for you couldn't I? Instead of leaving it all up to you."

"Uh-huh," she nodded, firmly believing he'd slipped a little nugget of something there even if she wasn't sure what exactly. "Well I have some reading to do. I look forward to, er, coffee. Fingers crossed."

The mist rolled back, the candles went out and she stood breathing out slowly, brushing hair from her forehead. A coffee date with a demon warlock! What was there not to love about that? All she had to do was gain access to the complete tome reference with an unauthorised master login and then hope it wasn't a book that was currently signed out and get a copy of the incantation photocopied without one of the librarians becoming suspicious. Easy peasy. Now to do the work she was meant to do instead of spending time with sexy turned fiends who were becoming a bad influence.

She spent the following weekend in a fog; slipping into idle daydreams while working her part-time job, checking her phone every five minutes for new messages from her demon warlock. He was such an enigma - capable of almost unlimited magical power and yet unwilling to use any of it to further his career. Demons were viciously ambitious to the point they would fuck over anyone and everyone just for a sniff of the inner circle. And he sat in a small office playing about with the demon database for kicks. He'd mentioned being in a situation. But what? Had he gotten himself in some sort of trouble? It was likely, he was a natural troublemaker it seemed. That part of his personality was fittingly fiendlike. From his badly written texts she had learned that he had two flatmates named Rap and Rave who had been his familiars during his studies at the Infernal Holy College. One of them was nice and kind and the other one was a bastard who had tried to eat him when they had first met during his childhood. They lived in an abandoned high-rise block in the now disused part of the underworld known as purgatory. He hadn't told her why. Demons were supposed to reside in the city of Pandemonium, everyone knew that. It was full of fire and excitement and the wailing of damned souls. Purgatory was a barren wasteland containing nothing of interest. She hoped for answers when they went for coffee. She was still waiting for that login.

It wasn't until the morning of her next demonology class that her screen lit up with a mixture of letters and numbers. Finally! She breezed through her lessons. There was a going to be a big test this week and a pass guaranteed access to the Fiend Mastery syllabus. Even though this wasn't what she wanted to do, she'd be more than willing to keep at it for a good grade in a higher tier. It would look good on her CV. Sitting in front of a library PC with the box blinking, waiting for her to type, she felt her heart race. Here goes nothing! Username:1337Haxx0rz Password:SUCKIT666! Logging in... It worked. It actually worked. She had full access. Her search yielded real results and she scribbled down the manuscript numbers in her notepad, her hand shaking slightly. She could be kicked off the course for this, her demon summoning permissions taken away and she'd never have access to Anar again. A little bolder this time now she knew where she needed to look she walked through the rows of metal bookshelves stopping to check each book on her list. Most of it was purely text and as she read she could feel some apprehension setting in. Roaming wasn't to be taken lightly, demons could and had used it for meddling in the affairs of mortals. Incomplete permissions had resulted in devoured souls or mysterious accidents. When she reached the final tome and flipped to the page the incantation looked for all the world like some kind of legal document. The print was tiny and plentiful. Warnings splashed about the margins from past students. Had she been a little naïve? He'd spent so much time convincing her he was trustworthy and not like the others but... wasn't that kind of the problem? He convinced everyone (especially his colleagues) that he was trustworthy and actually he was far from it. Well, she'd come this far. The photocopier hummed. With a snatch and a grab she popped the book back and swiftly exited, descending down the library steps and making her way home.

Before she could do anything else she needed to have a shower. The warm water helped to ease her mind and she felt her stiff shoulders relax. Of course it would all be fine. She could read an incantation! She took advanced magick. And Anar didn't want to hurt her, he just wanted to... go for coffee. She soaped up excitedly. Coffee. Yup. Hot, steamy, delicious- she'd really gone through all of that because she fancied him. That was what it all boiled down to, he'd flirted with her and she was so attention starved that she was now doing his bidding in an attempt to get into his pants. She'd given up on the cute guy in class and was chasing after an underworld minion. Not that he'd took much chasing, he was begging for it. Their 2am conversations had been testimony to that. Sometimes he had trouble sleeping and sent her raunchy texts detailing some of the things he'd like to do to her. She'd replied in kind. Part of her wondered if they were going to get coffee at all once they had each other to play with. Her phone dinged. Anar had his own tone so she knew it was him. Probably wondering when she was going to summon him. It was typical, she was busy for five minutes and people wanted her. Better than not being wanted. She had to be squeaky clean and fresh if he was going to get his big grey hands on her. Squeezing water from her long auburn hair she wrapped a towel around herself and stepped out into her room. She tapped the phone screen. ' I have a suprise 4 u' he'd sent. Did he now? Hope it's a nice surprise, he is a demon after all.

She set up the circle and lit the candles. Dressed in her frilliest blouse and silky black skirt, her nails freshly painted and make-up on she trembled nervously; this was a big moment for her. Black mist rolled. Grey wings unfurled. He had dressed to impress too, tight black polo and trousers. Rawr. His nostrils flared, "you look amazing," he grinned.

"Not so bad yourself.'

"Did you...?"

She held up the photocopy, "ta-da!"

"Nice! I've got something for you too," he winked. He held out a taloned hand and the air shimmered as a mysterious item appeared from nowhere. "It's a portable summoning circle," he explained, "we're going digital now." It was a flat metallic disc with a pentagram etched upon it's smooth surface. Instead of candles there were blue LEDs . "Cool, huh?"

She furrowed her pale brow, "it's very small. Do you fit on top of it?"

"No, no," he laughed, "it projects. Watch this." A tiny click and the whole room lit up with light, an array of beams replicating a summoning circle that bathed the walls and floor with an eerie blue glow. "This is the future of demonology right here. No more type 2 charcoal or whatever it is you're using now. No more scrubbing wax off the floor. It's cutting edge technology, and," he added, "it's all yours."

She didn't know what to say. A gift! For her! He was the first guy to ever give her anything other than heartache. This was so much more than she expected. How had he gotten his filthy mitts on this? She was sure there had been some shenanigans involved. It shut off and she blinked, seeing spots.

"Fits in a pocket, or bag. So, coffee?"

"Yes," she muttered, still transfixed at the marvellous gadget in his palm. He coughed politely. Oh! The incantation. Nearly forgot. She reluctantly tore her eyes away and picked up her photocopied piece of paper. She read it through carefully, making sure to speak clearly and fill in the blanks:

Underworld archives. Arcana Obscura. Chapter 15:

Roaming Privileges for your demon.

Ever wish your faithful fiend could travel by your side? Are you tired of being the bullied nerd and want to intimidate your enemies? Then this is the spell for you!

(All instances of 'you' and 'your' within this document refer to the demon currently in use being a registered and certified minion of the underworld.)

Read aloud:

This incantation grants you limited access to the plane of the living on this day at this time for the duration of (insert quantity of mortal minutes here). You have the following restrictions and are bound to them at the risk of your personnel file being deleted without pay if you fail to comply -

  1. You may not cause harm to any living soul either by direct will nor inaction without clear instructions to do so by your summoner. Further guidance can be found in 'vague commands and how to ignore them' in your department's Welcome to Afterlife services binder.

  2. You shall not bring about events considered to be apocalyptic in nature (see: demon code of conduct handbook 'world-ending events and you')

  3. You shall not attempt to bring down governments, monarchys, autonomous collectives, presidency's nor perform a coup of any kind without written and signed consent in triplicate from three Inner Circle members of level 9 or higher.

  4. You will obey any and all commands given orally to you by (insert your name here), unless they directly contradict: demon code of conduct handbook 'acceptable commands policy: keeping your job when your summoner is mentally unstable' and/or rules 1 and 3.

  5. You will at all times stay within twenty feet of your summoner in any metaphysically possible direction, interstellar/interdimensional travel withstanding and use a corporeal form at all times.Proceed.

Disclaimer: Although Hell Afterlife Services LTD have made every effort to ensure the contents of this third party incantation are fully operational at time of print, the aforementioned HAS LTD do not assume and hereby disclaim any liability to any party for any loss, damage, death or disruption to reality caused by errors or omissions within said incantation. Demonologists are advised to take full responsibility for their safety and know their limits. Before practising the arts described in this document be sure that your minion insurance is up to date and covers all specifications including Time Paradox. Do not take risks beyond your level of experience, aptitude, training and comfort level. You have been warned.