Love Is... Chapter 4

Story by Jeeves on SoFurry

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#4 of Love Is...

Love is not something that everyone finds easy to show, or to find. But me... I... well, I...


Love is not something that everyone finds easy to show, or to find. But me... I... well, I love it. :3 To show that, this series of short, single-scene stories is all about the many aspects of love.

Love Is... Sharing everything, even the bad stuff.

" Emmy!? H-help!!"

The vixen woke up with a start, her heart pounding as arms gripped her shoulders, shaking her violently where she lay. In the pitch dark of their bedroom she could just about make out the dark shape of her boyfriend at the end of those arms, but what was by far the most noticeable factor was the high, choked whimpers of absolute terror escaping his muzzle as the collie dog continued to shake her. Normally Martin was rather difficult to frighten, not that Emma had ever really tried to do so, and he certainly didn't have any obvious fears or phobias that they had encountered in their time together. At that moment in time however he sounded like his very life was in danger, like he might die of fright.

Emma pulled herself upright, grabbing the male around his own shoulders even as he continued to hold onto her. Despite having woken her up in an attempt to get her attention though Martin recoiled from her touch the moment it was laid upon him. He yelped, tearing his arms away from the female's shoulders only so he could use them to pull hers away from him. She had to grab his wrists just to stop him shoving her backwards and over the side of the bed, and that only made him scream louder.

"Martin! Oh Martin, what's wrong?"

Still struggling, his entire body nothing more than a flailing form in the darkness, the collie's cries were louder and more piercing with every moment. So much so that despite the random, incoherent nature of what he cried out next his lover still had to tell herself consciously that he couldn't be making sense; that what he was saying had to be some sort of mistake or misunderstanding.

"They're coming!! E-Emmy... ohh god they're coming to take you away from me! I felt them... I... t-they dragged us apart! I heard them hurting you! T-they fucking killed you! You were screaming, begging me to help. I tried... oh god, I tried Emmy, but..."

His voice trailed off rapidly in a foul sounding sob which made Emma almost certain that Martin was retching silently behind his sorrows. She forced herself not to think about that though, now convinced that her boyfriend was indeed confused or unaware that he had been dreaming. Instead the vixen threw her arms around him once more, and this time to her relief he did not draw back. Martin threw himself desperately into her embrace, clinging fiercely to Emma's shoulders with violently shaking paws. He buried his face in her neck and began to sob without restraint, whimpering like a child and still trembling from head to toe in grief and fear.

Emma cradled him, her own heart racing with fear and uncertainty as she whispered soothing words that seemed to have little effect into his ears. It sounded to her like he'd had a nightmare, but quite what kind of nightmare could conjure such feelings up in a grown man the vixen didn't know. She wasn't ashamed of course, not in the slightest! All Emma could feel at that moment was worry for her lover; afraid of whatever fears were lying in his subconscious that could plague him so much, and hoping beyond all hopes he would realise before long that they were both completely safe!

He didn't though, at least not at first. For almost ten minutes Emma held onto Martin as he cried into her neck, the first few in great wracking sobs and then in smaller, quieter but no less sorrowful whimpers and sniffles of fearful misery. She rubbed his back gently and kissed him on the forehead, all the while telling him that it was okay; that she was safe and so was he. Emma thought it probably would have been more helpful if she'd leaned over and turned on one of the bedside lamps, removing the inherently scary darkness from the situation. Tightly as the male was holding onto her though, his fluffy torso wrapped tightly around hers, she didn't think that Martin would react well to her trying to move away from him.

Finally Martin did fall silent, and though he neither spoke nor moved from within her embrace Emma was certain that she could feel his cheek reddening against her shoulder. If he was registering embarrassment at how he'd behaved, not that Emma believed he should in the slightest, it at least indicated that he was aware of what had... or hadn't, as the case seemed to be, happened. Deciding to strike while it was still fresh in his mind, but not too fresh, Emma drew back from their embrace slightly and looked with tender concern at the spot where she imagined that the collie's eyes were probably looking out from.

"Martin..."

She searched desperately for a sensitive way to put it, wishing to spare her lover the possible strain of having to dwell on whatever had disturbed him so much. Failing completely to think of anything that sounded remotely tactful though, Emma soon decided that the simplest query was probably the best under the circumstances.

"...sweetie, tell me what happened. Were you dreaming?"

Emma actually jumped as the collie responded. His voice was so quiet, so drained and low that for a moment she actually wondered if someone else had slipped into the bed in Martin's place!

"W-when I was a puppy, I... I used to have recurring nightmares. Only for a few years, a-and they stopped when I was ten. I haven't had one since. Not until... u-until..."

His voice cracked, and through their less intense but still intimate embrace Emma felt the male shuddering once again. Part of Emma though that she should drop it there and let Martin recover for at least a little while longer. But then she thought about what she would do in such a situation, and if given time to relax the most probable answer would be to pretend it hadn't been such a big deal and try to make Martin forget all about it! Maybe that would be fine, and maybe he never would have another nightmare again after tonight. It wasn't a risk Emma was willing to take though; not as the echoes of her boyfriend's fearful cries continued to ring in her ears.

She could almost see Martin properly through the darkness now, her sharp eyes adjusting to the ever so slight street-lamp light slipping in beneath the curtains and using it to bring the collie's face into focus. To her surprise and relief he didn't look scared anymore, but he didn't exactly look like laughing either. Emma presumed that this meant he could see her too, and sure enough he seemed to have seen the question lying within her gentle green eyes before the vixen could ask it. He hung his head slightly, as though still embarrassed, and spoke again in that same grim, unsettled tone.

"I had them the first time when my parents got divorced."

Emma's paws left the collie's shoulders and grasped his own hands, holding them between the two of them and squeezing comfortingly. That alone would be enough to give any cub bad dreams, but something told her there was more to it than just the breaking up of his childhood home.

"W-when I first heard them fighting and arguing, I didn't know what to think. I loved them both so much, and they'd always been really good to me... it killed me to hear them saying all that stuff to each other. How they wished they'd never met. Never married. N-never had kids. I used to lie in bed at night, pillow over my head... l-listening to them. I'd tell myself it wasn't real; it wasn't really them... t-that monsters had gotten into their heads and were making them do all those horrible things. But I guess I convinced myself too well, b-because when I fell asleep..."

He shuddered anew, and as quickly as she'd picked up his paws Emma dropped them again, embracing Martin fiercely once more. If he'd had some sort of dream akin to that tonight and it had brought back all those terrified feelings of loss and powerless insecurity from his childhood, no wonder he'd reacted so strongly! There was however still one thing that the vixen didn't understand. Why now? Though still divorced his parents were perfectly happy and healthy, and there were no other furs who Martin was close to that were in any state which might have given her boyfriend reason to feel this way.

"Why tonight then, sweetie? What made you have a nightmare like that now?"

With his head resting against Emma's left shoulder once again, Martin let slip a fresh sob. The vixen's eyes widened in dismay as she wondered if she'd pushed him too far and made his mind slip back into contact with those terrible, frightful thoughts. Before she could try to console him though, or tell him that he didn't have to say anything else, Martin had already spoken up. To Emma's shock and stunned, rather muted delight, he sounded far from distressed. In fact although he was still undeniably crying, she'd go so far as to say that her lover sounded... happy.

"I w-was... I was thinking about me and you last night. We've been together for almost two years now, a-and... I was thinking about how much I'm in love with you. Then, a-and I swear I don't know why, I ended up wondering what would happen if we ever broke up. I c-couldn't take it; it was like I'd taken this perfect red apple and then shoved a big fat worm into it all by myself, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get it back out again. I couldn't stop myself thinking about life w-without you. Emma, I... I don't want that to happen. Not ever!"

Shaking her head and stroking the back of his neck fondly, Emma whispered reassuringly into the collie's ear. Neither did she! She didn't want anyone else, and she loved him so very much as well! What the vixen didn't say however was how scared saying that made her feel, no matter how true it was. They must have said how much they loved each other several times each day, and that was only outside their more romantic encounters in the bedroom when it was hard to stop them saying it! But the way Martin had put it, and the way she had responded so honestly in return was different to the normal _I love you_s they shared. It was more like... like a proposal, only without the exact words.

The worst part was that Martin probably didn't even realise what he was saying, unnerved and emotional as he was. But Emma... she knew that she meant it, and that scared her a little too.

"Oh Martin..."

Pulling away from the collie for just a second, but still keeping one paw against his soft fur at all times, Emma flicked on one of the bedside lamps. Light flooded the room, illuminating Martin's tear-stained face and bare chest as the vixen turned back to face him once again. She held out her arms, smiling even though she too was feeling a little weepy, and beckoned him back into her embrace.

"Hold me Martin... hold me close."

The male shuffled across the bed towards her, slipping his arms underneath the big, baggy t-shirt she was wearing and encircling the soft orange fur around her lower back. She murmured appreciatively at the extra contact, laying her head down on his left shoulder as he did the same on hers. Emma kissed the collie on his neck, then his cheek, and then nipped him affectionately on the ear as she leaned in to whisper to him once more.

"Lie down with me. Lie down and... look at me. Just look at me. Keep showing and telling your heart that I'm still here, that I'm not going anywhere. Look at me, and know that I love you so... so much."

Together, with the light still on, the lovers lay back down and pulled the covers up around themselves. Their heads drew back, resting on their pillows and gazing warmly into one another's eyes, but their bodies entwined more and more. Legs and arms twisted together, not moving all that much, just seeking to make contact with as much of their partner as was physically possible.

They looked at each other for some time, unmoving, unspeaking. Gradually though Emma saw Martin's eyes beginning to droop, and she smiled as before her very eyes the male drifted off back to sleep.

She didn't sleep though, at least not for a while even after Martin had slipped into the land of nod. Her mind was buzzing and her heart was pounding, like she'd fallen in love for the first time all over again. Was this what the collie had meant? Was this the feeling that had driven him to nightmares when he'd thought about losing it? Emma certainly thought that losing it would be a nightmare... especially since she'd only just realised how strongly she herself possessed it!

Unlike Martin though, the vixen didn't let herself be drawn in by thoughts of what might be in some dark, unfathomable future. In fact she smiled, and though her lover was sound asleep leaned forward to kiss Martin rather lengthily upon the lips.

Mid way through this illicit kiss Martin murmured, pulling her a little closer. Emma was forced to break it off at that point, fighting back the urge to giggle as she thought how sweet he could be... even when unconscious. She didn't leave him entirely alone though, running a paw across his upturned cheek and gazing into his handsome face with deep, caring devotion.

"No-one or nothing is going to pull us apart. Not ever."

Whispering to her lover, to the bedroom, and to any monsters in the shadows that may have been listening, a single glimmering tear rolled down Emma's right cheek and onto her pillow.

She sniffed, smiled, and closed her eyes.

By Jeeves