FSE

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formerly SoFurry search engine

Written by Choice Cuts Deli

Commission for Starsage | July 2020 | 2566 Words

Kaleb groaned as the morning light caught him in the eyes, his head throbbing a little as he blinked in a vain attempt to stave off the morning. Normally when the black-and-tan jackal frat boy had survived a rager of a party, Kaleb would try to prolong his sleep before getting a glass of water and a handful of pills to get through the day. But curiously, his body felt heavier than a normal night of over-drinking. In an effort to keep the sun out of his eyes, the college boy turned his head to the side in frustration, and it was only then that he realized just how different the morning was going to be.

Kaleb found himself staring at a massive solo cup next to him, filled with the dregs of some liquid and easily towering over his body by what seemed like several feet. Next to that, a mountain of pizza boxes lay haphazardly stacked, a few half-propped open. He could see a few dirty dishes stacked around, and across the vast chasm that was his frat house kitchen floor, was the stove area, covered in red solo cups, discarded plates and a few appliances. This was confusing to him of course, as Kaleb was normally about 5'4", not large by any means but definitely not small enough to have this vantage point. It meant that somehow, he had shrunk down to the size of a large rat, about six or seven inches tall. As he lay there, contemplating what on earth had happened, he decided to rack his brain to think back to last night.

It had been an ABC Party, an Anything But Clothes party, where all the guests were required to come in an inventive item that wasn't normal clothing. Some had done the bare minimum by sticking their legs through a cardboard beer box and calling it good. Others got inventive and had plastered themselves with Post-It notes or crafted pool toys into crop tops and miniskirts. And then there was Kaleb, who happened to have himself a costume he saved from Halloween for just such an occasion. An old sandwich shop mascot costume, the front and back designed to look like two large plush slices of bread, with armholes cut out of the front. The 'filling' in between was also plush, thick slices of tomatoes, a frill of lettuce, and an oversized slice of cheese all framing the spot where his head poked out the top. Kaleb got lots of comments about how he was the best meat for the sandwich, and of course he got pretty cocky as the night went on, drinking plenty of cheap beer and liquor until the evening became a haze. As he turned his head a little more he could see the edges of the oversized sandwich costume framing him, having fallen asleep in it without even noticing.

But thinking back he remembered one other thing about the night before. Someone was bragging in typical college fashion about having got their hands on some shrinking drugs. He vaguely remembered them talking about testing it. And then... oh no. And then he stupidly gave them his cup to refill... Kaleb grunted as he pushed himself up by his hands, wobbling to his feet in the not-quite-footlong sandwich suit, an action that was hard to do when he was normal sized, let alone tiny. Standing in the shadow of the offending solo cup, sharpie-markered with KALEB in big block letters and a doodle of a jackal, he had to look his mistake right in the face.

"Ha ha, very funny guys..." he said, dusting himself off as he growled in a voice that came out more a squeak than a threat, "...anyone awake... or can anyone hear me?" He huffed as he looked around, arms hanging in front of the sandwich costume dejectedly as nobody answered. "I dunno if I should go to the health center over this, how long does this shrinking shit last? Damnit, there better not be pictures of me passed out in this thing on FluffBook..." The hangover did not help his ability to walk as he tried to step over to the edge of the dinner sized kitchen plate someone had so haphazardly plopped his costumed form on the night before.

It all happened in a rush, a whirlwind of brown fur and whinnying passed through the kitchen, as he always did on Monday mornings. Aaron was a party-boy, just like Kaleb was. But unlike Kaleb, the massive Arabian horse jock was easily six feet tall and built like a beast. He could drink to his heart's content and roll out of bed the next morning functional enough to get to his noontime chem lab. As he plowed through the kitchen in his usual clip-clop daze, his body bumped right into the tower of pizza boxes sitting on the kitchen table, sending them toppling over. Kaleb was barely able to turn his sandwich-suited body around with a quick wobble to his legs, just in time to catch the corner of one of the boxes to his padded gut, knocking the wind out of him with a sudden THOCK.

"Dude, last night was intense!" The dumb jock said aloud, absentmindedly scrolling on his phone as he walked around the kitchen. "Lessee... backpack, yeah... got my books in there. Alright... oh wait, I gotta get my keys!" The horse whickered softly as he started to walk past the kitchen table back towards his room when something caught his eye. Maybe it was the juicy looking tomato slice peeking out, or maybe it was the inviting bread... or maybe it was just his drunk gut growling out for some food. "Oh, huh... someone made a sandwich last night and left it out?"

His massive hooves towered over Kaleb's body, the horse carefully pushing the cardboard box off the top of the sandwich before giving the jackal-sandwich a little smoosh with his fingers. Inside the suit, Kaleb was reeling, the huge pizza box having been just as forceful as a gut punch to the micro-sized critter, forcing him to curl up on the plate. To any observer, it would look like an ordinary sandwich from afar, even if the outside felt more like costume felt. The jackal suddenly felt himself being hefted up as his roommate's hand grabbed the soft outside of the sandwich, giving it a little squish with his fingers. Just as he began to scrutinize it, he felt something vibrate in his pocket, causing the massive horse to lose focus almost immediately as his 'Oh Shit You're Late Alarm' began to buzz violently.

"Heck... it's a little stale... eh I got a minute, just gotta toast it and it'll be fine." He said to nobody in particular as he turned towards the kitchen counter. Kaleb groaned, feeling his body squished between the horse's powerful grip, turning his head up just in time to see the toaster oven looming before him. The jackal's breathing quickened as he saw it, shaking his head but unable to draw in enough breath to say a word, his cries barely a wheeze as the horse's phone alarm chirped louder and louder in his pocket. "Yeah yeah, I know, I know I'm gonna be late." Aaron wasn't going to make valedictorian by any means, but as Kaleb felt himself deposited face-up on the toaster oven's foil lined tray, he couldn't believe that his roommate was THAT dumb.

With a heavy slam to the glass door, Kaleb realized just how dumb his roommate really was... and to his horror, he was able to turn his head just in time to see those powerful fingers reach out and turn the knob on the toaster oven. The old toaster groaned as the knob clicked from the off position to on, the dial turning freely as the horrid machine shuddered all around Kaleb's body. Turning his head back upwards he watched as the metal coils above him groaned to life, electricity running through them and causing them to glow a bright hot orange. A burst of heat washed down over his face, arms and over his toes, the only exposed parts of his body, causing the poor boy to flare his nostrils and cough in a sudden panic as the metal pan underneath him began to heat from the glowing coils on the bottom.

The jackal staggered to his feet, yeowling and gasping as he managed to roll first to his side and then to his knees, any exposed flesh quickly beginning to sizzle as it touched the hot metal tray. Tears flooded his eyes as he staggered helplessly, the edges of his cute costume beginning to singe and sear as if he really were a hot panini. Kaleb threw himself at the glass door, bumping his face hard against it as he tried to throw his weight behind a panicked bid to escape. Instead, the old clasp held firm, leaving him pathetically propped against the door. Through the glass, Kaleb cried out, screaming at the top of his lungs in the seething hot air as his chef absentmindedly triple-checked for his lost keys, the horse paying no heed to any of the sounds coming from the kitchen.

Kaleb pounded his fist against the glass, again. And again. And Again. Each time managing barely a rap against it. As the heat overtook his body, causing the poor boy to sweat and exhaust himself inside the sandwich costume, he started to pant and whimper. Each breath was a rush of hot air into his lungs, causing his terrified pounding to become more and more uncoordinated. Just as he saw Aaron victoriously hold up his missing set of keys, the Jackal's eyes began to fade into the darkness of the heat. One last gasp, followed by a haphazard thump on the glass of the toaster oven, before the boy slumped backwards. The suit's springy material helped ensure that his crumpled form spread back out into roughly the same position that he was deposited in, just in time for the toaster oven to ding loudly and catch the horse's attention.

Aaron loomed over the toaster oven door, smiling as he gingerly opened the hot glass front and pulled out the tray, gasping as he burned his fingers like always on the toaster. "Ow! Hot! Hot! Geeze..." The horse gasped and shook his hand off, gingerly using his fingers to lift and grasp around the now beautifully crisped sandwich. The outside of the 'bread' had toasted just right, crisp under his fingers as he squished it softly. But distracted as he was, the horse paid no attention to the little signs that he was not holding a real sandwich, like the two limp and seared arms hanging down from the bottom of his sandwich, or the jackal's feet curled tight to the leg holes from the boy's futile attempts to defensively curl up inside.

Closing and locking the door behind him, the Arabian found himself juggling all his gear as he walked towards campus once again. A chill breeze washed over him and his little toasted sandwich, the sudden rush of cool snapping Kaleb out of his unconsciousness. His eyes opened to see a world in motion as Aaron fumbled with his backpack, trying to heft it off his shoulder. Of course, the horse needed to dig through his backpack for something, probably trying to find his headphones for his walk to class. The jackal was barely roused when he found himself face to face with Aaron's powerful jaws, the horse's flat herbivore teeth approaching his his tiny form.

"A-A-no wait!" was all Kaleb could squeak out in panic as Aaron stuffed half of the sandwich straight into his mouth. The jackal watched in horror as the powerful grinding teeth, drool snaking and stringing from bottom to top, closed around his body. He could only hope that the horse wasn't going to take a bite, the threat of chomping clean through his body a real horror as he felt pressure grow on both sides of the sandwich. But instead of shearing through his body, the horse simply held the sandwich in his massive jaws as he rooted about in his backpack with both hands. All Kaleb could do was whimper and squirm in some vain attempt to be noticed, eyes darting up and down at the sights of his pulsing throat so close to his face.

"Hmmm...?" Aaron grunted to himself, the expression of frustration at not finding the thing he was looking for blasting Kaleb right in the face with hot, sticky breath. Idly, the horse's tongue lolled up around the edges of the bread, giving the sandwich a little lick as he did. His tongue caught the edge of the jackal's singed and seared face, cutting off his whimpering pleas with a wet slather of drool rolling across his face. Aaron was ravenous for breakfast, and it showed. Finally giving up on his search, the horse hefted his backpack back up again, and returned his attention to the sandwich that was still most of the way stuffed in his jaws. Placing a hand on the end hanging out his mouth, the thick Arabian horse began to push it from behind, forcing Kaleb to slide closer and closer to the pulsing, roiling throat.

The jackal cried, screamed, pleaded, and wriggled, shaking his head as the horse tilted him back, letting a mix of gravity, swallowing and his pushing fingers shove the sandwich in. In the end, perhaps Kaleb should have gone with a footlong sandwich instead - his six inch form was only a mouthful to the brutish horse's jaws. One long, deep gulp was all he needed to make the whole sandwich disappear down his throat. Aaron grunted contentedly, teeth closing with a clack as he felt the muscles of his throat contract and squeeze, squishing the sandwich bread and Jackal alike into a single swallow, feeling that whole bite slip down his throat in a noticeable bulge, before it dropped down into his stomach. Without a second thought, Aaron wandered off to class, his hunger sated.

Sitting in chemistry, listening to another boring explanation of the lab procedure, the horse idly tapped at his phone, browsing over the latest messages coming in from FluffBook. Folks from the night before had shared pictures, with lots of drunken shenanigans floating around his friend's pages. Tapping the New Post button, he began to type out, "Yooooo last night was such a boss party." He smirked, tapping his photo reel to see if he'd taken any pics worth sharing... and that's when Aaron realized his mistake. It was a photo, a group of seven or eight costumed people, standing around the kitchen table. Most of them had happy thumbs-up expressions or were pointing down at something on the table. That something, was a sandwich, roughly six or seven inches long, with a drunkenly passed-out Jackal head poking out one end, and feet sticking out the other.

Aaron's heart sank just as he let out a soft belch, the scent of digestion filling his nostrils. But of course, the horse wasn't the brightest guy in the world. Instead of rushing to the infirmary, he tapped to add the picture to his post, before typing, "Look what we did to Kaleb! Crazy night, looking forward to next weekend."

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