Loving You is Wrong
I always wanted to do a vampire fox story, so I'm happy I finally was able to do one.
You can also find me on Patreon where this story initially came from.
"Is it time yet, Radic?" you ask as I tire, having spent the last few hours poring over old manuscripts you got for me. I can only smile and beckon you to me, Ekrem. Somehow your timing is always perfect, and your warm fur against my body entices me in ways you can only guess at. Everything about this is wrong, and yet we both do this dance willingly.
I know my touch is cold against you, but you never complain. You never shrink away, and I know not if I have enthralled you, or if it you who has enthralled me. I no longer care honestly. A fox like myself could easily feel inferior with a leopard like you, but you don't shrink away from me. You take me by the hand and lead me to the bed. You welcome me inside of you with grace and love. It makes me feel alive again as I watch you getting on top of the mattress and them beckoning me.
With you lying there on the sheets, I want everything you will give me, and everything you won't give me. The blood in your body is warm, and it calls to me. I lick my fangs hungrily. I should care, but I am hungry. Hungry for you. So hungry for you it hurts. I want to drink you in until there would be nothing left. I worry someday I may. I worry about that a lot.
I climb on top of you, and your legs lift. Your tail lashes in anticipation and your shaft gets hard. I smile, whispering sweet words to you. "Now it is," I say, and you shiver. You shiver every time. I thought it was magic the first dozen times, but I have put no spell on you. It is you who has put a spell on me. I hate you for that too, and yet I would want it no other way.
The lube is always right on hand too, as I look for it. I know you put it away, so you planned this. You read me so well. It is in that moment, as I feel myself hardening, my knot starting to grow as I slick myself up, that I wonder why you love me. Why do you stay with me? Even down there, I am cold, but you never mention it. It must feel weird when I enter you my dear, Ekrem, and yet you do not complain. Instead you beckon me. You wrap your arms around me, as I line myself up. Your raspy tongue licks at the scruff of my neck. Most would run away from a monster like me. You instead submit.
As I thrust inside, you writhe under me in ecstasy. Each push drives you further toward the edge. Your spotted fur bucking against my red and white body. You cry out in pleasure, your claws digging into my fur as you have to hold on. I just want to ravish you, each thrust driving me crazy. Each moment giving me a little bit of your warmth that I so desperately hunger for. The fact it is so brief makes me curse the gods that created this world, but if this is all I can get left from life, it will be enough.
You moan out in pleasure, and even my breathless voice rasps while we intertwine. Your eyes squeeze shut in ecstasy. Your heart beats so loud, I can hear it pounding in my ears. The blood that keeps you alive taunts me, just below your skin. Each of my thrusts make it whisper a seductive song in my ears, and yet... it's not that which I want in these moments. It is to see you happy that drives me, to see you satisfied, and every time you are, after I have spent myself inside of you.
Later, as I snuggle up to you on the bed, my mouth grazes your neck, I have to resist the urge to bite and taste that coppery delight. It would be easy, so quick to take it all, and yet I would never forgive myself. I would never be happy again. It's tough being happy when you're me, so instead I get close and let the scents in your fur envelop me. Even after sex, you smell like earth, leaves, and sunlight. It reminds me of everything I've lost and can only experience through you. My soul, if I still have one, longs for these things, and yet with you, I have them again. I have everything a fox could desire. It's why I worry so much about losing you.
My leopard lover, I am wrong for you, and yet I am with you. I love you, even if it's wrong. I have wondered if I should bind you with my embrace, but I do not wish you to suffer like I have, Ekrem. I do not wish you to ever feel the way I do, a cold body that does not breathe with a heart that does not beat. You don't complain though. Why don't you complain, Ekrem?
I know time is against us also. I shall outlive you and someday you will be gone and I will still be here, in this world, alone again in this castle. I need only drink all of you, and then give you a little of myself to bind you to me forever, and yet... I haven't. I can't curse you like I was. I know sometimes you beg me to do it, to bind us forever, and I am beginning to realize I will. But not today. Not yet. Not while you're still warm against me in this bed. Not while I still have time to look for a cure to see if I can free myself of this curse.
"Do you need to drink, Radic?" you say, as we're lying entwined together, my tail draped over your hips.
"No," I lie. I am hungry, but I wish to see no harm come to you, Ekrem. I wish to see no harm come to anyone. I will again hunt in the dark just before dawn and attack some cattle down in the village. It will keep me going, even if it's not potent enough to satisfy me.
The warm blood in your body taunts me, it tempts me, but I will hate every moment of it when I finally drain you. I will take no pleasure in it, if that is the only way we can live. An eternity in death together is still a pale shade of life. I miss the sun, and as I curl up against you, I can feel the hints of it still on your fur.
As long as we can stay here, as long as we can be together, I think I still have a soul. I do not believe vampires still have souls, but somehow with you, I do. With you, Ekrem, I still am alive.