Loving and Lusting for My Brother Chapter 8
#8 of Loving and Lusting for My Brother
Author's Note: Thanks to my friends, watchers, and viewers. You guys are great! This is the final chapter of Loving and Lusting for My Brother.
Loving and Lusting for My Brother
Chapter 8
Malakai's POV
I sit down on a bench at the station, waiting for the train to take me away from here. Why am I sitting here? Well, I guess I should go back a bit. The past year has been rough. I never thought anything could tear us apart. I never thought anything could poison our relationship, but something did. Something that had always been there. Something that I just couldn't put up with anymore. I'm a monogamous fox, through and through. I hated the idea of sharing Rodya with other guys, but it was the only way to keep him. I accepted this arrangement at first, but over time I just grew more and more resentful. I found myself getting angrier and angrier with him over every little thing. I had even begun losing interest in having sex with him. I tried everything I could possibly think of to make him forget those other guys, to only want me. I catered to his every sexual desire. I had always thought all those hookups in the past were just because he felt he couldn't have me, but now he could. So what gives? I grew more and more frustrated with him and stopped offering sex altogether. Of course he was disappointed, but I quite simply didn't desire him anymore. It shocked me at first when I realized that. That I no longer wanted to be in a relationship with my brother. I still loved him, but I finally realized that there was no saving this relationship. Of course, Rodya never considered it one in the first place. I began applying to jobs in other cities, cities that were far enough to put some distance between us, yet still easily accessible by train. I ended up getting a job in the tech support department in the emperor's palace. I still remember how Rodya reacted.
"But why?" Rodya said.
"I need space Rodya. You and I just don't work as a couple" I said.
"We're not actually a couple. Stop it with this romantic stuff, that's not us" Rodya said.
"That's the problem. I am a romantic and I can't change that" I said.
"Then go find someone else. We can just do our thing on the side", Rodya said.
"That's what I'm going to do once I move to the capital, except I'm not having sex with you anymore", I said.
"But why do you need to move away to do this?" Rodya asked
"I just feel we need to put some distance between us. I'll still come visit on holidays. I just think we need our own places", I said.
"But I love having you here", Rodya said.
"I know, but..." I started to say.
"No, I get it. I'm just making you miserable", Rodya said.
"I'm just frustrated is all. I wanted things to work out, but you and I are just so fundamentally different. I don't want to take away your freedom, but it breaks my heart to realize that I'll never be your one and only. I know we can never legally be a couple, but I don't care what the law says. I just wanted you" I said.
"Malakai, just because I enjoy having sex with other guys doesn't mean I don't love you. I don't want traditional things like marriage or kids or couples stuff. I don't believe in sticking with one partner with the rest of your life. Look how well that turned out for mom and dad. I love you Malakai with all of my heart. I just don't want you to go" Rodya said.
"Rodya, I...look, a monogamous person and a non-monogamous person just doesn't work together. Neither of us will ever be happy in the long run. If you really love me like I know you do, then you'll set me free" I said.
Rodya stood silent for a few minutes before finally saying, "you're right. I'll let you go even though I don't want to."
"Thank you" I said.
A few days later I packed up some clothes and a couple other things and left the house. Before I got on the bus to the train station, Rodya walked up to me at the bus stop and asked, "Can I have one last kiss?"
I looked around and once I saw that the coast was clear I said, "Sure, Rodya."
We hugged each other tight and kissed each other on the muzzle.
"Goodbye Malakai, good luck out there in the big city," Rodya said.
"Thanks Rodya, I wish you luck too", I said.
I then boarded the bus and twenty minutes later here I sit. Waiting for the train to arrive and the next chapter of my life to begin.
Rodya's POV
It's been a few months since he left. Letting Malakai go wasn't easy, but I knew it was for the best. Our "relationship" just couldn't survive. This wasn't how I thought things would turn out when I fantasized about being with my brother. I have fun with my fuck buddies, but it's not the same as being with him. At least he and I got to taste the forbidden fruit. To finally know what it is like to have sex with each other. And I wish we could do it again. I asked the night before he left for one last fuck, one last night of forbidden passion before he moved away. But he simply said, "No thanks" and went back to packing up.
He's left a lot of his things here, mainly his extensive collection of old computers. I look at them sometimes. I don't use them, I just like to look at them. I keep the basement the same way he had it. Every so often I go down there and look around and think back to the good times we shared, even if its painful to remember some days. Sometimes I just lay down on his bed and cry. I miss him so much. Denver tries his best to comfort me, but the pain never truly goes away. I will never stop loving and lusting for my brother.
The
End