FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

1. We walked and walked through the dark forest. It was past midnight now and it felt as if we were walking forever. I opened the side-pocket of my backpack where I kept my GPS receiver and turned it on. I was on unfamiliar terrain. During the months that I lived with the pack over two years ago, I had never really ventured outside of the the hunting grounds and the pack's territory, except for my trips to Balaghat. "Ah yes, I remember you having such a contraption. Be quick though. That thing is very bright", Bagheera said while holding short, allowing me to catch up. "What is it?", Tabaqui asked. With a hand, I shielded the illuminated display. "It enables me to navigate and see where I am. And it shows me that we're no where close to anything I recognize. Where are you taking us, Bagheera? We're not anywhere near the pack's territory." "Going back there would be very unwise. Shere-Khan most likely is tracking us. Last thing I'd want is him to follow us to the pack's territory." Bagheera looked away, "And well, I've not been there since I left with Alexander to go look for you." "Sura said you both disappeared. I was worried Shere-Khan got you as well. But what happened? Why didn't you return to the pack?" The panther sighed, "Like I said, we have things to talk about. But we have to move on now. We have to cross a stream a bit further on, which will at least make our scent trail harder to follow for that tiger. After crossing it, it's only a short walk further."

I dunked my head in the fresh water, which brought me back to my senses. After an invigorating drink, I waded through to the bank on the other side while holding my back-pack above my head. Bagheera and Tabaqui followed behind. "We should be a little bit safer now", Bagheera said while shaking himself dry. With a towel I took out of my backpack, I dried most of the water off of my body and put my clothes back on. "You surely are carrying more than you did before", the cat remarked. "Yes. I had a chance to properly prepare myself this time, in stead of finding myself lost after almost being beaten and stabbed to death." "Beaten and stabbed to death?", Tabaqui asked. "We'll catch up when we get to my den", Bagheera said. "This little river, you know. When you follow it up-stream, you'll end up at the lake and waterfall where your den is." "Was. I don't think I will ever go back there", I softly said. Bagheera looked at me in silence for a few moments before gesturing with his head, "Let's walk the last stretch to my den. And um. There will be a surprise there." "Uhg. Please. I'm not in a mood for more surprises. I've had too many now. And bad ones at that." "This one will be alright, I think. Come on."

We continued for a while longer, until a big, red wolf appeared from between the trees. "Your surprise?", I asked Bagheera. A few meters from us, the wolf stopped. "What is this Bagheera? You said you'd be out on the hunt." "These two crossed my path." "Tabaqui...", the red wolf snarled while looking to the striped hyena. "It's alright. He has helped us, Vermillion." The red wolf sarcastically smirked, "Helped? Him? Now that's a first! And this human... Is this that human you've talked about? He doesn't really look that much." The panther nodded. "Yes. That's him. "This is some pray you return with", he looked at me while grinning mockingly, "Half dead prey, even." "Leave him alone", Bagheera cut the red wolf off. "Your sarcasm isn't really helping." "I guess the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree", I grumbled. "What do you mean by that, human?", Vermillion agitatedly asked. "Lala", I replied. "You're her father, right?" The red wolf stared at me for a while, and without saying anything, he turned around and walked away. Bagheera shook his head slowly. "Come, you two. Follow me."

We walked to a dense collection of older trees and brushes. Through a narrow, twisty path we came to an area which was completely overgrown. The pathway arced down and lead us to an area below ground level. There were two dens there, both small natural caves that were eroded out of the rocks by tree roots over the course of centuries. The entrances were on either side of the path which ended in a rocky wall, covered in thick roots. It was a bit wider there, giving it the impression of being a common area in between the entrances of both dens. I picked a spot against the rocky wall, placed my backpack against it, and used it as a back-rest to lean against. My eyelids steadily grew heavier.

Bagheera nudged my arm, waking me out of my slumber. "You need sleep. I'll take you to my den." For one more time, I hoisted myself upright to walk the few steps to the entrance of Bagheera's den. Tabaqui followed for a few steps, but was stopped by Vermillion, who gave the hyena a hard stare. "You've always been a pain and a nuisance to us and you were Shere-Khan's minion and bear responsibility for some terrible things. I trust Bagheera's word on that you've had a change of heart, else you'd have been dead the second I lay eyes on you. But that does not mean that I trust you. You won't set paw in either of our dens." Tabaqui splayed his ears, and lay down with a disappointed sigh, "I... I'll sleep here then." I wanted to protest to Vermillion about locking the striped hyena out, but before I could say anything, the red wolf had disappeared into his den on the opposite side. The panther tugged on my left hand. "Come."

On my hands and knees, I crawled into Bagheera's den with the panther right behind me. A rocky outcrop which was in the wall of the den made a good improvised cloth hanger, and I undressed. The black panther sprawled on the ground and invitingly raised one of his front paws. I took up the invitation and I sprawled on the soft leafs and other vegetation that were spread out on the floor of the den next to the feline. The black panther maneuvered the upper half of his body on my chest very carefully as not to hurt me, and placed his paws on either side of my head. The sensation of his soft, thick fur on my skin made me shiver. I looked up in his bright eyes. "I have missed you so, so much", he softly whispered. "I am so glad you are back, after all this time." My eyes burned. Bagheera licked the tears off of my cheeks with his rough tongue. "And I can see that you're glad to be back", he smiled. Tenderly, the big feline began to wash me, licking up crusts of dried blood, and cleaning my wounds. The stinging pain when his tongue rubbed over the punctures, claw marks and the sore black spot where my body hit the rock made me shudder. But the slow, rhythmic brushing of the panther's tongue over my skin soothed me. Before long, I was fast asleep.

A raspy tongue in my face woke me up. Dazed, I looked around the den. Daylight shone through the thick cover of vegetation, bathing the den in a faint light. "Just like old times", he smiled. "You've slept like a cub." "Oof. I was exhausted. I've not slept properly in days", I yawned. "Let's go sit outside and see if the others are awake."

Tabaqui was awake, but was still laying down with his head between his front paws. Vermillion sat opposite of him, grooming his red fur. When he spotted us crawling out of the then, he got up and walked over to greet Bagheera. The feline sat down and let the red wolf lick and sniff at his teeth and tongue before he rubbed his head against the wolf's flank and chest. After sharing cuddles and other affection with the feline, Vermillion came to sit down and lean against me. He then lifted his right front paw and positioned himself over me, his paws on either side of my shoulders. I closed my eyes, the wolf's fur making me feel all snug and warm, as I wasn't clothed yet. "I'm Lala's father, yes. Do you know her well?" "Yes. I miss her. I miss her a lot." Vermillion rested his muzzle on my head. "So do I. I've not seen her since she was a cub." Bagheera, wanting to give us some time to get acquainted, said to Tabaqui "Make yourself useful and help me with the hunt. You two need to feed." The striped hyena looked at Bagheera for a few seconds before yawning, standing up, stretching his limbs, and following the panther out of the den area, leaving me and Vermillion alone.

I held the wolf's paws with my hands. Vermillion's scent was quite similar to Lala's, and he reminded me of her. "I'm sorry I was so cold to you." I looked up at the wolf. "What about Tabaqui?", I asked. "It's hard for me to forgive and forget. Especially after what has happened." "He has shown heart to me", I said. "He no longer does Shere-Khan's bidding." "It'll need time", the red wolf said softly, nuzzling and licking my ears. "You like this, don't you?", he smiled after a little while longer. "A lot", I exhaled. Vermillion reached down, opened his muzzle, took my nose and mouth in between his lips and held me like that. Taken by surprise at first, I soon gave in when that familiar, wonderful feeling came back after so long. The feeling of being one of them. Connecting, bonding, belonging. I inhaled his scent and licked the inside of the the red wolf's muzzle. Vermillion then let go and began to lick my mouth, asking me to let him in. I accepted and parted my lips, and the wolf took his turn to taste me. "You do speak our language", he smiled before tongue-bathing my face some more. "He's also a bit of a cuddle monster", Bagheera, who had just returned grinned. "Affection is important in a pack", Vermillion said. "Did you catch any prey, Bagheera?" "Tabaqui actually did. He's outside of the den area waiting for us", the feline replied.

The red wolf got back on his feet and I, now deprived of the blissful warmth of his fur, crawled into Bagheera's den to put my clothes on. I realized how long it had been since I actually fed from a fresh kill. It would be a challenge for me to stomach again. This was one of the only parts of pack life I had never truly learned to deal with. I had to, though. No kill meant no food. And I needed food, fast. The hyena had killed a deer. He stood over it, his muzzle and chest covered in the animal's blood. "Claim your share, Tabaqui", Bagheera said. "You've deserved it." After a nod from Vermillion, the striped hyena dug his jaws in the flank of the animal. Bagheera saw the look of revolt appear on my face and grinned. "Not used to this any more, are you?" Vermillion nudged me towards the kill. "You're not going to eat?" I squatted down next to Tabaqui over the carcass, trying hard to ignore the scent, sight, and the moist, smooching sounds the hyena made while tearing and shredding off large bits of meat, drew my knife, and cut a slab out of the deer's hind quarters. "That's all I need. Please, eat", I said to Bagheera and Vermillion.

I wandered off, cleared a patch of rocky ground, and collected a few twigs and branches to start a fire like I've done so often before. With the bowie knife, I filleted the steak, and positioned the pieces of meat on the tops of little sharpened branches at the right height above the flames. A flat surfaced rock had the right dimensions for a make-shift plate, and I wiped it clean as best as I could. After a few minutes, the meat was done and I dug in. With the hunger that I had, it didn't take me very long to finish the pound and a half worth of meat that I had cut away. With a thick branch, I extinguished the fire, and spread out the ambers over the rocky surface, bashing them out with a rock.

All that was left of the deer were bones. Bagheera, Tabaqui and Vermillion had returned to the den area. With an uncomfortably full stomach, I joined them and sat down next to my back pack. "I can't think about any more food now", I exhaled, softly belching under my breath. "If you're thirsty, there's a small stream of water a few minutes walk from our dens", Bagheera said. "I can show you." "I'm alright for the time being, but thanks", I replied" A few minutes of silence followed. "So tell us. What has happened to you? You just disappeared after you left to go find and bring Mowgli", Bagheera broke the silence. I stared into the void for a few moments and inhaled. "After Alexander asked me to go and find Mowgli, I drove to the human town in the car. Shortly after I got there, I was arrested. Or erm, captured, as you would call it." "Captured? By who?", Bagheera asked. "Authorities. Police. The remains of the poachers I killed were found washed ashore. I was a suspect and was imprisoned." "That's terrible", the panther sighed. "Though better than what we feared. We thought that Shere-Khan got you for some reason." "No. I was locked up in a cage, like you were. For weeks. It was terrible. A double murder in this country carries a death penalty at worst, or a life in prison at best. I realized that I would probably never see you and the pack ever again. Thankfully the guy in charge there appreciated that I had done his dirty work. Those two poachers were criminals and wanted for all kinds of wrongdoings. He made a deal with a judge, and in stead of execution or life-long imprisonment, I got deported back to my home country. That didn't really make me feel any better though. For my part, I might as well have been dead. It would be even harder to get back to the pack from the other side of this planet than it would have been from a prison here."

Bagheera shook his head. "That explains why you were gone for so long. How did you get back here though?" "I pretty much picked my human life back up where I left. After two years, I read about Shere-Khan killing Mowgli's human caretaker and decided that I had to get back as quickly as I could. I pretty much abandoned my life back there. Reading about what happened just hit too close to home and I felt my place wasn't in human society, but here with the pack." "Or so I thought", I added bitterly. "You said you came from the pack's grounds when we met up yesterday. That surprised me. I mean, everyone must have been very happy you returned. So why didn't you stay there?", Bagheera asked. "Specially Sura would have been happy. He it took so hard when you didn't come back." I clenched my jaws. "Did I say something wrong?", Bagheera worriedly asked.

"I... After I got back to the human town, I made my way to the pack's grounds as quickly as I could. But when I came there, I found the area deserted. No wolf had been there for a long time. I wandered around for a while, until I found my way to the den." "The den?", Vermillion asked. "Luri and Alexander's den", Bagheera explained. "The entrance was sealed with rocks, earth, and vegetation. Sura showed up behind me and was very cold and stark. He blamed me for everything. He said there was nothing left for me, and told me to leave. He came accross as very hostile. I didn't recognize him like that at all. It dawned on me that if Alexander never returned, Luri's remains had to be be inside, and that the den now was her tomb." "That is... truly horrible news", the black panther sighed. "Sura didn't say a word about her though. It still puzzles me. He said my suicidal desire to go after Shere-Khan would not change anything. I questioned whether he cared about me being alive or dead. It's then when things got bad. He jumped on me, baring his fangs. I felt threatened and reached for my knife. He then told me he'd kill me if we'd ever meet again."

Bagheera shook his head. "You've saved his life twice. One time when pulling him out of harms way when that buffalo charged, and the second time when his wounds got infected. A wolf NEVER, EVER forgets that. You should have known that. And above all, he's your brother! Let me explain a few things about wolf behaviour that you should know. When angry or hurt, wolves can be vicious, even to those they care about. They'll snap and bite, but never seriously injure one another. Sura probably was hurt when you said he didn't care about you, and wanted to rub that in. But you were blind to that and crossed a line you shouldn't have crossed." "And how do you think I felt?!", I exclaimed. "Put yourself in my position. I travel halfway accross this planet to get back to those I love, only to find my home deserted, my adoptive mother presumably dead, get blamed for all the misery, and get told to go away and never come back by my own brother the moment I see him. How could I interpret that in any other way than hostility?" "By thinking like a wolf", Bagheera replied. "Try to live in human society for over two years, and see how sharp you are when you return." "Don't forget that I did." "Akela did take you under his wing, Bagheera. You were helpless when he found you", Vermillion said. "I owe much to that pack", the panther said while looking down. "And I've turned my back to it." "What happened?", I asked. "Why didn't you return? Shere-Khan called you a coward and said you ran away the moment things turned bad."

"Of course he'd say it like that", the black panther angrily said. "I fought him for all I was worth. But he just ignored me, as if I was some pesky insect on his back. No matter how hard I clawed him, how hard I bit him. It seemed to have no effect on him. He had his mind set on Alexander. And well, after it was all over, I could either give in to my anger and emotion, continue to fight Shere-Khan and suffer an equal faith, or make a run for it, and escape with my life." "So you where there when he...?", I hesitatingly asked. "Yes, I was. It's etched in my mind and it haunts me to this day." A long silence followed.

My heart raced, and pounded in my head. Sweat ran down my face. Raging anger boiled up again, my mind playing imaginary visions of Alexander's dying moments, and images of his rolling skull in front of my eyes. My muscles tensed up, my fists balled, my body ready to leap and lash out to where my hatred got focused on. Soft fur against me, rhythmic drafts of warm breath on my skin and a rough tongue brushing over my face snapped me out of the building rage in time. Tabaqui had backed up against the rocky wall with his tail between his legs and a look of raw fear in his eyes. I face-palmed and leaned against Bagheera. "We're both carrying this burden, my human friend", he soothingly said. Tabaqui no longer was in the den area. "That look in your eyes", Vermillion said, "It scared him. And to be honest, I wasn't feeling very comfortable either." "I'm so sorry", I sighed. "Tabaqui didn't deserve this. I'm here mostly thanks to him." "I'll see if I can have a word with him", Bagheera said, and the black panther walked off.

Vermillion stared to the rocky wall. "I'm still struggling with him. You and Bagheera are suffering because of recent events he and his clan-mates had a part in." "Their participation wasn't voluntarily. Their decision to defy Shere-Khan and help me did not come without sacrifice", I replied. "That tiger killed his clan-mates in retaliation. He has nothing anymore. No family, no clan, nothing." "That tiger is causing too much pain and misery in this forest", Vermillion sighed. "Not just the forest. He killed Mowgli's caretaker. It's a matter of time before hunters will come here to hunt him down." "I don't like that idea at all. Humans should stay in their towns and settlements." "They want revenge as badly as we do."

Tabaqui came back into the den area, followed by Bagheera. Without looking at us, the hyena walked back to where he was before, and lay down. Bagheera looked at Vermillion and gestured with his head. The wolf shook his head and sighed, walked over to the striped hyena and sat down next to him. Tabaqui looked up at Vermillion in surprise. The wolf gave the hyena's nose a soft lick, then his cheeks and muzzle. Being a bit shocked at first, Tabaqui soon surrendered to the wolf's affection and rolled on his back. Vermillion reached over him and tongue bathed the hyena's face, chest and stomach. The hyena got back on his legs and looked me in my eyes. A look of sorrow, regret. But also concern, and fear. I looked down to the ground. I felt awful. Bad. Horrible. Bagheera nudged Tabaqui towards me until he stood in front of me. Slowly, I extended my left arm and lay my hand on his right shoulder blade. "You and your clan saved me from Shere Kahn, Tabaqui. I'll be forever thankful for that." The hyena exhaled and leaned into me. I embraced him and buried my face in his black and white fur.