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I got a call from Justin. He sounded defeated- I don't know how else to put it. His voice lacked the usually light tone, replaced by a low, almost monotone, depressing sound. When he said "Hi" I could hear him trying to make himself sound happier than he felt. He explained to me that he lost his job. I listened with ears cupped to him explain that he knew we needed gas so he tried to just take around twenty dollars from one of the registers. He thought he got away with it, but today when he came into work the store manager pulled him into the office and he admitted he didn't try and lie (he said he knew how he could have but the truth just hurled itself out of his muzzle).

"Justin," I said in the calmest, most sincere voice I could muster, "It's fine. We'll find you another job. It's going to be okay. We still have money left over and I make enough to get us through the short period of time that it takes you to find another job."

"Scout," he said, his tone picking back up, "I want to move back home."

"What?"

"I want to move back to Ft. Pearce. I hate it here. We're both miserable here. You hate your job, I lost my job. I can move back and you can go back to school. You know your mom will help you."

I started pacing in the back room, letting my paw graze the bags of reptile substrate, the cool plastic and the soft feel from the soil underneath was somewhat calming. The U-boats haven't been worked in three weeks and somehow that's my fault even though the actual manager in charge of them is probably blowing my boss under the table as we speak. It's bullshit, but no one says anything because the store leader decides that everyone is replaceable, which is why we only have new people who have no fucking clue what they're doing. I'm the last remaining "O.G" as everyone calls me. I used to be the only one who realistically ran this store but I'm tired of it, Justin's right. The habitats need to be cleaned but the Companion Animal Leader decides her job only consists of playing with the animals and not the upkeep. The aquatics section is losing fish left and right because the marten who runs that section thinks she's the be all end all of fish, but she doesn't know shit. She gives wrong information and when I try and help, she says I'm the wrong one. Well, Meghan, if I'm so wrong why when I was in aquatics I had the highest sales and the least loss of fish? Oh, right, I know what the fuck I'm doing.

"Okay."

"Wait, really?"

"Yes," I said, pausing to look at all the overstock. "I hate it here, and being in this situation obviously isn't helping our relationship that much. I could get my degree and get a better job."

"Plus, instead of continuing with your financial degree, you could go into environmental."

A little smile crept across my muzzle. "Yeah. Yeah, fuck Ft. Myers. Let's move back home, I can stay with you or go to my mom. I mean you would only be maybe an hour or so away. Well, we can talk about it. I'm going to call my mom now."

"Okay. I will too."

"Alright, I love you."

"I love you too."

I tapped the red button with my claw and punched in my moms number. It only took three rings for her to answer.

"Oh, hi honey," she sounded happy. "I was just thinking about you."

"Well, I wanted to talk to you about something," I said and started pacing again. I paused long enough for her to ask why I was calling, but she didn't. I sucked in a breath. "I'm thinking about going back to school."

She sounded skeptical after a long pause. "Why?"

I sighed and started pacing faster, slapping the brown substrate bags as I passed. They were a push order we didn't have room for. I bet she could sense how serious I was, and high. She always could tell. "I want to do better in life and not live check to check. I want to provide for myself better."

Her pauses were so drawn out. I think she was being petty. "Scout. Are you serious about this? Your father and I would love to help you but you can't let your grades go down like they did again. You should be paying us right now-"

"I know! I know, mother. It's just," I sighed and shook my head. This was such a bad idea. "I don't want to live in this situation anymore. I want to get a degree. Ed said he could help me with a job if I went to environmental-"

"Environmental?"

"Oh- uh, yeah. I want to change my major."

"When did this happen?"

"The other day," I said. "I was thinking about it and I want to switch to something I'm passionate about."

The skepticism never left her voice. "And, you're sure?"

"Yes."

She sounded reluctant but she also had a twinge of hope. "Ok, Scout, I'll talk to your father."

"Ok, thank you. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetheart."

I hung up with her and texted Justin what happened. He didn't respond at first, he was still on the phone. But when he did respond he told me to wait on putting in my two weeks until we had a concrete plan. I agreed and went about my day as normal.

She hung up the phone before I could. I let the screen shut off and leave me with the dusty bags of substrate. I leaned against the cold metal of the U-boat and sighed. Who knew what type of shit show was about to happen; between this apartment and all the debt we've accumulated...it won't be easy to just walk away and start fresh. Lord knows my parents will help, but it depends on how much they give us. And then we'll have to be smart with it. I need to be smart with it. Once I go, there's no telling if Justin will still live with me or if he's going to stay back at his parents.

Shit. I need to choose classes. I'm only going to be able to pick from a handful of them. I'm also going to need to change my major. And get into campus housing. If it's even available. I quickly unlocked my phone and started going through my school's website. The lights above me timed out and left me in darkness save for my bright screen. I somehow remembered my login and immediately checked the holds tab. I had two holds, one for skipping a semester and another for what looks like an unpaid bill or ticket, it didn't say. I would have to sign up to speak to an advisor and have them take the holds off for me, and it'd have to be sooner than later.

A page for the manager rang out from the speakers above me. I cursed under my breath and clicked off my phone before dropping it into my pocket. If this is for something stupid, I'm quitting now, I chuckled to myself.

It was for something stupid: someone wanted to hold a savannah monitor when the sign says "no handling". After that, there were no other pages and by the time I knew it, the other manager came in to relieve me and Justin was in the parking lot waiting for me. I stepped out of the wide doors to the front of the store and finished folding my apron before tucking it under my arm. My car was in the first parking spot and Justin looked calm as I walked up, his head buried in his phone. When I opened the door he didn't jolt, he kept typing out a response to something.

"Hey," I said, settling into the seat and closing the door after me.

He dropped his phone and put the car in reverse. "Hey, how was work? Actually, what did your mom say?"

"She said that she'd talk to dad and get back to me," I pulled out my phone. "And no response yet. She sounded skeptical, though."

"Hopefully she'll help."

"Yeah," I said and opened up Pawstagram. "I'm sure she will help, but there will be strings attached."

He sighed, his tail lashing against the seat. "I'm sorry, Scout."

I lowered my phone and looked towards him. He was focused on the road but I could tell he was sad. "You don't have to be sorry-"

"I only did it to help us," he said quickly.

"Justin," I rested a paw on his thigh, "I know. I'm not mad. It was a mistake and that's it. Don't think too hard on it. If anything, look at this as a way for us to better ourselves. We can save money, you can at least if you live with your parents. I will if my mom helps a lot. And then when we're ready to get another place we can get it somewhere better. We can have more options."

He smiled and met my eyes for a second before looking backs towards the road. "I love you."

"Love you too," I smiled back, "bitch."

He gave me a light punch on the shoulder and told me to put on music. It felt like normal, it felt good. He might be an ass sometimes, but so can I. No one should ever put their paws on someone else, but I did push him to it. It's like watching road rage videos: there's one guy antagonizing the other, and when he gets his ass beat, we cheer. But when it's a loved one, and we can't accept how much of a mouth they have, the sympathy goes to the perceived "victim". For me to blame all my misfortunes on someone else isn't healthy, especially blaming your boyfriend. But, then why does he do what he does? Talking to guys? Acting shady about his phone? It doesn't make any sense. But, maybe that says more about him then it does me. Or maybe it shows more about me than anything, how much of a failure I am at relationships.

"What are you thinking about?" Justin asked as he turned out of the shopping center onto the main road.

"I was just thinking about how bad I'm gonna beat you on Gang Beasts when we get home," I forced a smile.

I'm happy he was focusing on the road or he'd be able to see me forcing it. "Oh- okay. That's how it's gonna be, I see."

My fake smile melted into a genuine one. Worrying about that kind of stuff is exactly what my therapist warned me about. Instead of focusing on the negative, take the positives out of life. I have a lot of work to do.