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Eggceptional Get Away Khloe

Khloe yawned as he woke up from his nap. He tried to uncurl from where he had been asleep but found himself stuck unable to move. That was bizarre. Come to think of it where was he taking a nap anyway? It sure was dark. He remembered that he had gone into some dusty old barn that was clearly in desperate need of his services... Then there was a flash of light... And now he wasn't sure what was going on.

But a large part of him just wanted to forget about it, curl up and nap some more. Wherever he was, it was nice and cozy. There didn't seem to be any reason to leave it anytime soon. So he drifted back into blissful sleep completely oblivious to whatever was going on around him.

Sadly, someone else seemed to disagree with his plan. Khloe was woken up from his slumber by the sound of tapping noises coming from above him. He tried to grumble and protest, but in his tired state all that came out of his mouth were adorable squeaks. The tapping didn't cease and he was forced to completely wake up. He was still in dark cramped space and couldn't figure out where the tapping was coming from. He tried to reach out to the tapping with his arms to find what was making the noise. His hand came in contact with some kind of wall... But as it did the wall began to crack. Then it gave way completely and the walls around Khloe collapsed.

Khloe unrolled from his curled up position and let out a huge yawn. It was so bright now it took him a few moments to notice what was going on. He was sitting in the remains of some kind of shell that was in the middle of a field of bright yellow flowers. It looked like this was some kind of forest clearing judging by the trees in the distance. More importantly than the location though were the locals.

There were several of them, and they had Khloe completely surrounded. They looked like dinosaurs! Though with admittedly rounder figures and softer proportions than Khloe would expect from a dinosaur. They were quite colorful too. Even now he could see a green one, blue, red, yellow, orange, pink, purple and teal. Then each of them was wearing a pair of solid colored boots and a red saddle. Each of them were also easily four times Khloe's size.

"Abooooo babooo!" Khloe tried to give a shout and hold his hands up over his face protectively. Those... Weren't the first he had intended to say. They weren't even words, not even by his standards. This gave Khloe enough pause to look down at himself. His fur was gone as was one of his tails! He was some kind of single tailed freak now! His entire body was still cream covered, but instead of fur now had much smoother scales. Like the other dinosaur-like creatures around him, he had a spines running down the back of his neck. He was just a lot smaller than them, and even more round. Wait he knew what these dinosaurs were! He was some kind baby...

"Bum bum dum bum!" The green dinosaur started jumping up and down. "Yoshi!" At this point the rest of them all began to jump up and down as well. The purple one ran up to Khloe, and fitted a pair of light blue boots on him and a red saddle. It then backed away and resumed jumping up and down with the rest of the creatures.

What happened then Khloe wasn't entirely sure. The yoshis were all jumping up and down and shouting something. He wasn't sure if it was gibberish like the noises he made or some language he didn't understand. But it sounded like they had started to sing some kind of melody. Figuring he had no idea what was going on and nothing else to do, Khloe decided to just roll with it and join in.

"Abooooo ra baaaaaa! Aboooooo ra baaaaaa!"It was fun just to see for no reason! He did have questions about why he was out here in the middle of the forest. Since he couldn't talk right now those questions would have to wait. For now it was just mindless singing.

"I come all the way out here, and this is what I find you dumb yoshis doing!?" A high pitched voice screeched from above the forest. Khloe looked up to see a reptilian turtle-like figure wearing a blue robe and pointed hat. He was sitting atop a broomstick that while holding a magic wand tipped with a blue orb in one hand. "No wonder you're all completely useless. And what are you celebrating anyway?"

"Arrooo bwhuuuuh!" The green yoshi answered.

"What nonsensical trite is that!?" The blue robed figure asked. "You should be celebrating the birth of the new heir to the empire!" At this everyone stopped and looked at Khloe. "No... Not him! Why... Why are you yoshis so dumb? All though..." The figure lifted his spare hand up from his broom and rubbed his chin. "I suppose the new master does need a playmate. He is about the right age... And he looks dumb enough to never question his orders."

"Abuuu buuu!" Khloe protested at being called dumb.

"Aheh hee hee heeee!" The robed figure laughed. "Yes I think I'll be taking your precious little baby yoshi!" As he spoke his broom leaped into motion. It flew over the forest clearing as the figure held his wand up in the air. A cloud of purple and yellow dust erupted from the wand covering everyone in the area.

Suddenly Khloe couldn't move his body at all. Not even his tail would budge an inch. From what he could see in the position he was frozen in none of the other yoshis could move either. He could do nothing but watch as the blue clad figure flew down from the sky, grabbed him by his tail and lifted him into the air.

"You're coming with me Baby Yoshi." The figure spoke in his same high pitched voice. "And don't think any of you other dumb yoshis can do anything about it!" With that Khloe could only watch in horror as he was carried off away from the safety of the other yoshis. As he was carried through the air they quickly shrunk out of sight as did the entire forest. He was carried past the forest, over open fields, through a jungle, up a mountain trail, past snow covered fields and finally to a castle surrounded by lava.

By this point whatever spell had been cast on Khloe was starting to wear off. He found he could just barely move his finger tips and his feet. As feeling returned to his body he started trying to squirm a bit.

"Hey cut that out!" The koopa in the robe gave a shout. "Do you want to fall in the lava?"

"Abuuuuuu!" Khloe protested then looked down. Landing in the lava would probably be a bad. Yet whatever plan his captor could be probably wouldn't be any better. Were yoshis lava proof? He wasn't sure. Maybe that was a thing? This would be a heck of a way to test and find out. Khloe closed his eyes and crossed his arms trying to think and consider his options. First he had to somehow free himself from the koopa's grip with all the strength of a newborn infant. Then he had to somehow survive a fall of several hundred feet. After that, all that was left was to land in the lava hope he didn't die, and then swim miles to the shore. He supposed maybe there was one last step after that... He might have to trek all the way from wherever this was to that forest the other yoshis were at. Or maybe his own house. Come to think of it... Where the heck even were all these locations? That had been a lot of different scenery for such a short flight?

Well... Those were things to figure out later! Khloe didn't like to think ahead. It helped him justify his bad decisions. For now all he needed to do was work on his escape plan. He had complete control of his body again so it shouldn't be too hard. Probably. He started to squirm as much as he could. His muscles weren't developed enough to do much bending, but he could certainly twitch his tail, arms and hands! After a few seconds of squirming he suddenly felt the koopa's grip on his tail release.

He had a brief moment of realizing he had made a terrible mistake as he entered into a freefall. Well hopefully the lava would break his fall. And not kill him. That would also be nice. Well nothing to do now but wait for him to splash into the-

THUD!

"Bwaaah?" Khloe was shocked when he landed against something solid. He knew lava wasn't exactly water... But he had assumed there would be more of a splash. Instead it felt like he had hit a stone surface instead. Lava was surprisingly hard! And cool to the touch... And it had been a really short fall too. Well he supposed now all that was left to do was swim the miles to the edge of the lava lake. Could he even swim? Well he could try flailing his arms and legs a bit. That was a bit like swimming.

"Um... What are you doing?" The koopa asked.

"Uwabah?" Khloe responded and opened his eyes. He was not in lava. He was laying on his stomach on a stone floor attempting to swim across it. It wasn't working very well.

"Seriously I know you're dumb, but just..." The koopa seemed at a loss of words. His broom was gone and he was now standing on the ground towering over Khloe. "Seriously, what is this?"

"Abba bwu." Khloe responded.

"I don't even know what I expected." The koopa put a hand to his forehead. "Okay let's just try to get through this. You can call me Kamek."

"Kaaa bwuuu!" Khloe said happily.

"And you can't even talk yet." Kamek sighed. "Come on you're like... Twenty minutes old now. You should have learned some of the basics by now."

"Bawwwuuuu." Khloe stuck his tongue out at Kamek.

"Let's just get through this." Kamek shook his head. "Alright first off... You have been brought here to receive the honor of being the new master's playmate. Normally we would choose someone a little less well... You... But you were the closest newborn to the castle. So congratulations, you basically won the lottery."

"Abuh." Khloe crossed his arms and stared at Kamek. He did his best to give a serious business squint. Due to his current age it mostly just made him look pathetic and adorable.

"Now we need to cover some ground rules." Kamek started. "First rule, the young master is always right. Even there is evidence about that clearly states otherwise. That's the privilege of being a prince. Rule number two! Whatever game or activity he wants to do is automatically what you want to do! Some days that may just involve a game of fireball tag... Others it may involve playing with the cannon to take out or 1 to 1 scale model castles."

"Abwuuuh!" Khloe smiled at that. That second idea specifically sounded like it might be fun. Wonton destruction was always a reliable source of entertainment!

"In that game you'll be taking the role of the cannon ball of course." Kamek continued.

"Bwaah." Khloe sagged his shoulders. No one ever wanted to let him play with a giant castle destroying cannon. Well maybe he might get a chance to do it after all if no one was paying attention.

"But the most important rule of all is rule number three!" Kamek held up his hand with three fingers up. "Remember this one, because your life may very well depend on it. You are required at all times to shower the master with praise and adoration."

"Ba ba bwah!" Khloe retorted. That one he wasn't sure on! Ok, he was used to being polite to a 'master' of multiple ages. But it was one thing to do it for a job! It was another to do it for someone who kidnapped you! It was demeaning! Or at least slightly more demeaning than his normal circumstances.

"Twenty-two minutes old now and you still haven't learned to talk?" Kamek stared at Khloe in complete disbelief. "Really not the brightest one huh? Okay we can make this work. Just try to sound really energetic and cheerful! Remember you're basically his yes man, so act like you're approving of everything he might say!"

"Aboo." Khloe stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry at Kamek.

"Oh it's going to be like that huh?" Kamek gripped his magic wand and pointed it directly above Khloe's head. A beam of energy shot out of it, and formed into a box made of multiple beams of light in the air. A moment later the light solidified into bright blue colored wooden bars as they fell down around Khloe. He was trapped in some kind of cage! Though... the cage didn't have a top to it, it was just four walls made of bars around him.

"ABWAAAAH!" Khloe decided to make an attempt to escape. There was no roof so he could just climb out! He quickly tried to stand up and fell flat onto his face. Stupid baby legs not being strong enough to walk on! He instead crawled over to the bars and tried to grab them and climb out from his prison. Again he ran into the problem that his body simply wasn't strong enough to pull it off. His attempts to climb resulted in him moving half an inch upward them toppling over onto his back. At this point he flailed his arms and legs trying to get off his back. It was hard!

"Ahhhhhhh hee hee heeeeeee!" Kamek laughed madly as he watched Khloe's futile attempts to escape. "Try all you like! But you'll find that the 'Cage Restraining Infantile Babies' or CRIB is completely escape proof! No matter what you try to do you'll be completely unable to escape this masterful creation of koopa engineering! Give it up!"

"Bwaaaaah!" Khloe wanted to taunt about how a crib wasn't an original creation of genius engineering. Everyone had them. However mindless babbling would have to do for now.

"Aheh hee." Kamek adjusted his glasses. "You should be thankful I'm so merciful. Were it the young master who knows what kind of abuse he might have give you for your transgressions. You should watch your tongue!"

"Abuh!" Getting an idea Khloe remembered something yoshis were known for. He opened his mouth and shot out his long tongue shooting it through the bars and grabbing Kamek by the arm.

"Hey knock that out!" Kamek flailed his arms about. "If you don't I'll be forced to turn you into a..." Kamek paused. "Well I'll be honest I can't think of anything worse off than being a yoshi. It feels like I could turn you into a ball of wool and it'd be an upgrade. I hope the young master isn't too displeased."

"Bwum!" Khloe was forced to withdraw his tongue and release Kamek. His threat wasn't effective... But again Khloe wasn't strong enough to physically restrain Kamek. It was a problem he was running into again and again with his infant body. Instead the best he could do was blow another raspberry at Kamek, then take a seat with his back to the magikoopa.

"Real mature." Kamek growled. "Act your age!" He then paused. "Wait no! I mean-"

It was too late. Khloe gave a wide smile, and then proceeded to indeed act his age. "Waaaaah! Awa whaaaaaaa!" Khloe began to cry at the top of his lungs. The high pitched cries of the yoshi echoed off the walls making the noise even more obnoxious. The entire castle was flooded with the noise of his crying.

"Nooooo!" Kamek pulls his hat down over his ears. "Stop it! Stop it at once! I demand you cease!" It was no use in this match Khloe was the winner as he continued to shriek. "I'll give you whatever you want just stop!"

Khloe paused at this. "Abuh?"

"How about... A cookie!" Kamek tried. "Babies love cookies, right?" Khloe shook his head. "A bottle of milk?" More head shaking. "How about a warm blanket?"

"Abu bwah!" Khloe objected! Actually all three of them sounded quite nice right now. A cookie, some milk and a nap time with a blanket would really put him into better spirits.

"You want all three!?" Kamek demanded.

"Bwah!" Khloe nodded.

"I can't do that! This is highway robbery!" Kamek demanded. Khloe responded by beginning to shriek again. "OK! FINE! STOP! You win! You'll have all three! But the cookie is going to be oatmeal flavor!"

"Ba ba bwah." Khloe smiled having won his negotiations.

"Can't believe I'm being strong armed by an infant..." Kamek sighed. "What has my life even become?"

"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAWR!" A high pitched shout echoed throughout the hall. Khloe was surprised it hadn't come from himself as he looked around in confusion. It sounded like it had come from another baby... Though one a bit bigger than him.

"Oh no!" Kamek looked panicked. "The new master has awoken already! I was sure I had another hour before he woke from his nap! There's no more time to prepare you! I have to present you to the master at once." Kamek quickly moved behind the crib containing Khloe and began to push it across the floor.

In this way Khloe was transported through the castle, across a bridge above a moat of lava, and into what looked like a combination of a throne room and a nursery. A red carpet went down the center of the room leading to a throne. But the walls were covered in pastel colors and had crayon drawings all over them. A number baby toys were scattered all over the floor.

Then there was the figure that sat upon the throne. It was an infant like Khloe. But it looked to be a completely different species. He looked like some kind of turtle, but with horns and a spiked shell. His hand and feet were tipped with sharp looking claws. There was... Something familiar about him. Khloe paused noticing the blue hair atop the master's head.

"Y-young Master!" Kamek addressed the baby koopa. "I've brought you a playmate!"

The End