World Domination
HOW TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD
This essay will be my theory on how to subjugate the human population on planet Earth and create a planet wide cult of the Furry Fandom. Such an endeavor will be tiresome, expensive, and damn near impossible, but if a black guy can be President, then this has a chance.
The stages of the Fandom takeover will include multiple stages. They are,
1) Injection
2) Acceptance
3) All out offensive
4) Systematic destruction of our foes.
5) Snack Time
These form the basic outline of the plan, which I have codenamed "Create a World of Furries" or CAWOF for short. Name needs revision.
STEP ONE, INJECTION
The first stage is called injection because it describes what will happen during the phase. Duh. It represents how we will begin our takeover by using subtle means, mainly by slowly learning hypnosis and blackmail to control the minds and mouths of the world most influential people, including the President, Rush Limbaugh, Mr. Pope, Osama bin Laden, Robocop, Chuck Norris, Gladys Knight and the Pips, Steve Jobs, and Jesus of Nazareth.
After finding a way to control these people, we will be able to start the injection of our Fandom into the mainstream media in tiny increments. This will include media such as FOX News, CNN, the New York Times, local newspapers, and thepeopleofwalmart.com. With this almost subliminal messaging in progress, we continue to apply it. We then wait three hundred and forty seven years until we see the second phase to initiate.
STEP TWO, ACCEPTANCE
The second stage occurs soon after the implementation of phase one. This stage is realized when the populace begins to feel the effects of the subliminal injections made into their society. They will begin by drawing furries in their spare time, watching Walt Disney's Robin Hood a bazillion times, wearing costumes while having sex, as well as creating a world wide epidemic of bestiality. This is also coupled with the fact that SoFurry.com will explode due to the influx of new viewers. Sacrifices must be made.
As they all see these things daily, their minds will become accustomed to the idea that furries are indeed real because you all have imagination and deep down, everybody would love to hump a fox.
Now then, in this stage we will begin preparing for our major assault...segue into step...
...THREE, ALL OUT OFFENSIVE
Good. Now this stage is by far the most important. In this stage we must begin an onslaught of furry related TV shows, movies, manga, and sex toys. It is here that the public's acceptance for the Fandom will finally culminate into both large earnings for our cause, used to create more pro-Fandom crap, and the populace's obvious sexual activity involving masturbation to furry porn, reading Ragetsu Denbu stories, and wishing they were foxes.
When we have finally garnered their love and respect, the changes into society will be massive. Historical figures and ancient art will be characterized by furry personas instead of homo sapiens, they will often openly discuss their animalistic fantasies, and everybody will just be fucking cheery. Our deluge of furry related media will be finally realized as the new "in" thing and our trends will never go away because we won't let them. We'll be more involved in the free market than the government!
STEP FOUR, SYSTEMATIC DESTRUCTION OF OUR FOES
Easily the fifth most controversial step, this stage requires that any person that openly mocks or denies the Fandom be taken into "Happy Happy Fun-time Camps" where they will be indoctrinated or shot. Either way, I don't care. Maybe the Lodovico technique...anyway, this is essential. There will be nay sayers and freethinkers, and they must be silenced else they destroy all that we have worked for. It is indeed time for the old Ultra-violence.
We must do what we must do in order to protect the Fandom and Big Brother. We must protect our way of life. We must not let one loud voice rise up. After all, Christianity was started by just one guy. Sure, he was a God, but that's not the point. The point is that all foes must be silenced...but in a happy way as not to arouse the suspicion of our followers. Conscientious objectors will be allowed to serve the furry military in a non combat assignment.
STEP FIVE, SNACK TIME
Good job! You have just subjugated humanity to your ruthless will! Achievement unlocked! 100 Gamerscore! Time for a snack!
So as you can see, my fellow furs, that this process is much easier than it seems. Though it may take some time, that only means that we should start today to ensure a brighter future for the world and our Fandom. Let us not tarry. We must start today!*
* "Today" meaning don't start today. Today means "later" meaning "not now", but in the "near future", but always the "near future", not "soon", or "in five minutes" or "once I get back from the grocery store". Some of this stuff is not legal. Ragetsu Denbu takes no responsibility for those stupid enough to listen to him. Or maybe he will. He has not decided yet. I'll ask him...he said no. Or did I? Time for Step Five!