Having Fun With Yourself

Story by grrside on SoFurry

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Throwing a party with nobody else but yourself sounds dull... But is it?


"Hey, guys!" Ranito T. Frog croaked happily. "You know what day it is tomorrow, right?"

"Of course!" One of Ranito's companions replied back. "You'd have to be a loser not to know it, hahaha."

"It'll be so much fun tomorrow..." Another chimed in. "I can't wait. It'll be the party of the century!"

Ranito's fat cheeks blushed with delight. "Gee, I didn't know you all were this excited." He had no idea he was that popular at all.

"How could we possibly be less excited than this? The birthday boy is so much fun to be around with! He doesn't deserve any less."

Ranito felt like he was about to melt with all these compliments. It was, after all, the first time ever he celebrated a birthday party so he wasn't used to be showered with good intentions.

"And he's hot too..."

"W-w-w-w-whaaa?" Ranito's usual green and yellow face was completely red now.

"Yeah, he's so amazing. I've came so many times just thinking about him..."

"WOW! Guys, we are in the middle of the street, you shouldn't say things like that!..." Ranito protested. Then the curiosity got the better of him. "...How many times, exactly?"

"Yeah, he usually has that effect on people... He's so naturally handsome..."

The obese frog was in heaven right now. "Awww... You have to be exaggerating!"

"His body is so big..."

Ranito raised his chin up in pride, thinking about his exorbitant body fat.

"...What I wouldn't give to touch him..."

The miniature penis buried inside Ranito's baggy shorts stiffened.

"...And ruffle his feathers..."

"...What?" Ranito stared at them quizzically, then looked down at his own body as if checking for spontaneously-grown feathers.

"Yeah! Hank G. Hawk's birthday party is going to be a fucking blast! I can't believe he rented out a house in a nudist resort and invited that famous rock'n'roll band to play at the beach! I was a real fan of The Beavers since I was a teenager!"

Ranito's body froze in complete shock. His penis shrunk away into nothing. "B-b-b-b-b-ut....!"

"It's only your birthday once a year, so I propose we all work hard to make Hank G. Hawk's day his best ever yet!"

Ranito was stuttering, still completely paralyzed. "B-b-b-b-b-but tomorrow is also m-m-m-my..."

"Ranito, we have to go to buy some last minute gifts. And...You're standing in the way..."

"M-m-m-m-m-my..." The group of people who didn't actually regard Ranito as their equal left the place, leaving the paralyzed frog alone.

When Ranito got home he looked at the pile of snacks, cheesy movies and party board games he had laid on the living room table and sighed. "I have no idea what I was thinking... I should've make sure to successfully invite at least one person before purchasing all this stuff..." The fat frog was feeling very tired even though the sun hadn't even fully settled yet, which was weird for a frog who pulled late-nighters like him. He was about to go to his bedroom to sleep without even bothering about making dinner when he noticed something strange on the table of party items.

"What's this?" Ranito wondered when he saw a quite rudimentary brown cardboard box. The words 'To: Ranito' were written on the side with a cheap marker and poor calligraphy. "I'm completely sure I didn't order anything." Ranito thought. Maybe it was an early birthday gift...?! But wait, that didn't explain why it was on the table and not in the mailbox.

The fat frog was getting a bit scared. Was this a prank? Did someone break into his house? Would he find something really nasty inside that box? Maybe he'd figure it out if he opened it...

An extremely optimistic part of Ranito's brain thought that the whole thing was some kind of set-up for a surprise birthday party... But no, that didn't seem likely. If anybody had a surprise for someone, it would be for that popular Hank G. Hawk dude. They would have been one day too early in any case.

So what was inside, then? Ranito felt like the box was a bad omen. The frog got closer to the box and his nostrils smelled something putrid. Whatever was inside, it really reeked.

It definitely had to be a prank. Something that was so fucking smelly couldn't good. Ranito turned around, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. "I don't want to open it, yet at the same time I really want to know what's inside..."

*THUMP!*

"What the...?" Ranito turned once again. He was certain he had heard a loud noise just behind him. But when he took a look around he didn't saw anyone. Everything was in order. Well, except for...

"T-t-t-the box is gone?!" Ranito exclaimed with terror. "Arrgh! Who's there?!" The frog started trembling thinking about an intruder. Did he just see a shadow lurking nearby? "No, wait, maybe the box just fell down to the floor or something and I'm overthinking things..." He thought to himself in a futile attempt to calm himself down.

The frog was about to look under the table to see if his theory held any weight. But that unguarded split second was all the time the shadow needed.

*BAM!* Ranito's eyes went wide and expressionless the moment his body felt the impact. A giant thud could be heard all over the house as the giant mountain of a frog plummeted against the floor. A heavy and strained breathing could be heard in Ranito's living room, but it didn't belong to the body currently lying on the floor. The foul-smelling breathing didn't take long to turn into an eerie chuckle.

***

Ranito dreamt that he had been invited to the hawk's birthday party. It was all fun and games, until he realized that everyone in a nudist party would, naturally, be naked... Included the obese frog himself.

Hank got on a big stage and grabbed a microphone. "Who invited that fat ball of green lard to my party? He looks so creepy and weird!" The rest of Hank's friends began to point and tease him as well. "Look! His little weewee is even getting hard! He must've sneaked in to the party to see if he can get any!" Some of them prodded his naked body with a wooden stick because they were disturbed at the thought of touching a slimy frog. "Go fuck yourself, whiny fatso!"

"That's not true! I just wanted to have some fun on my birthday!" Ranito yelled at the top of his lungs. Then he realized he was on his bed and all had been a nightmare. His cheeks turned red. He hoped no one had heard his pathetic cry over just a lousy dream.

The frog tried to go to sleep again. He hated mornings. But he couldn't relax because he could hear some chatter... Wait, wasn't he supposed to be home alone?

Startled, Ranito incorporated himself and searched the bedside table for his black-framed glasses. They weren't there. The frog thought he might have left them somewhere else but his line of thought was shattered when he lifted his bedcovers and discovered that he was bare naked.

That was strange, usually he went to sleep with some tight briefs for modesty at least. He then remembered last night's events. He remembered seeing a cardboard box on the table, then hearing a noise, and then... What happened then, exactly?

Ranito tried to hear what the voices were saying, they seemed to be arguing about something but they were too distant to hear. He got out from the bed. He needed to investigate, but he wanted some clothes first. He opened the drawer where he kept all of his daytime clothes but it was completely empty. "Damn!" He cursed. Maybe he had just forgot to take them out from the laundry pile, which was in the bathroom. Ranito opened ajar the door of his bedroom. The voices were coming from the ground floor. They sounded somewhat familiar, which comforted him, but it was still too early to lower his guard. So trying his best to be stealthy, the fat frog walked across the hallway with the tip of his toes, hands cupping his genitals, and opened the door to the bathroom with a swift movement...

...And there he was met with a horrible sight.

"W-w-w-w-what the...?!" Ranito stammered. Sitting on the loo was a strange person. This person was unbelievably fat and practically naked apart from the briefs which were lowered to his feet. The mysterious man's head was mostly bald except for a few feeble-looking stray hairs. He had a big gelatinous belly with two giant moobs sitting on top of it. He smelled exactly like how you expect a sweaty fat man to smell like, but the most disturbing thing of it all was...

"W-w-w-w-w-woah!" The mysterious person stammered in exactly the same way Ranito had just done. He raised his arms up in surprise as if he had been at gunpoint, revealing a wrinkly and flaccid yellow penis of a ridiculously small length. "Y-y-y-y-yikes!" He covered his crotch when he realized his little cock was in full view. "W-w-w-why didn't you knock first?!"

"S-s-s-s-sorry!" Ranito apologized. He was about to close the door to give the man some privacy but he snapped out of it and demanded some questions. "W-w-who are you? Why are you here in my house and most of all... Why do you look exactly like me?!"

"Don't be silly! We already had the original Ranito explain everything to us yesterday! Where you taking a nap through the whole thing or something?... A-a-and don't you see I'm in the middle of something important?!"

Ranito had no choice but to give his exact replica some privacy and closed the bathroom door. What the hell was this? Some twin separated from him at birth?! Then he remembered about the familiar voices he had heard and had a bad premonition. He rushed down the stairs as fast as he could with his hands covering his crotch, and he was devastated to learn that he was right.

The arguing voices sounded familiar because they were his own. In the kitchen there were two exact copies of Ranito trying to cake a bake.

"You're not doing it right! The recipe I looked up online said six teaspoons, not eight!" Yelled an angry Ranito dressed in summer clothing.

"B-b-b-b-but I wanted to make sure..." Replied back a shy Ranito dressed in winter clothing.

But that wasn't the end of it... In the living room there were four Ranitos watching TV and arguing about who had eaten all the snacks.

"I was the one who went to the candy store so they all belonged to me!" Argued one of them.

"With *my* money!" Replied another.

"B-b-b-b-but we all share the original Ranito's money..." Another one butted in.

"C-c-c-could you please lower your voices? I'm trying to watch this..." Said the one who had eaten all the potato chips.

Ranito was in shock. Where did all these Ranitos have come from?! And how many were there?! Afraid of the worst, he sneaked through all the loud Ranitos and went down the stairs to the basement.

There were another three Ranitos there.

They were all naked.

"Okay! If we're going to make the original Ranito lose his virginity today we'd better practice by losing our virginity ourselves beforehand! Are you all ready...?!" The one who looked like the leader of the bunch said.

"Y-y-y-y-yeah!" Said one of his subordinates, his small cock fully hard but shaking in fear.

"Uh... I guess...?" Said the other, his cock flaccid as fuck because of his nervousness.

"Alright! Today is the day we become MEN!"

The subordinates put themselves one behind the other. The one with the raging boner tried to insert his small penis between the nervous one's buttcheeks, but these remained firmly closed. "Hey, what the hell, open them up!"

"W-w-well, I've been thinking... Shouldn't you put on a condom first?"

The Ranito behind him started to tremble. "W-w-w-well I was afraid to learn what size I am so I got too shy and couldn't buy them..."

"B-b-b-but condoms are important, what if you give me an STD?"

The leader got frustrated at his subordinates' competence. "We are all Ranito! We can't transmit an STD by fucking ourselves!"

"Mmmmm... I'm not sure about that..." Replied the subordinate in front.

"Well, whatever! I'll just force my way in!" The subordinate in the back opened the huge green buttcheeks with his fingers and began to thrust. "Oh, yeah, bitch! Take my huge cock!"

"I don't find your words arousing..." Complained the Ranito as he was being poorly dry humped. "Why don't you pretend you're transforming me into a cum bucket? Or a table? That's much more sexy than calling me a bitch."

"Stop talking! You're deflating me!"

"Oh, a deflation TF sounds like fun!"

"I mean that you're making my cock soft!"

The leader got really frustrated at their performance. "You useless scumbags! I'll have to show you how it's done! I'll turn this into a threesome!" And with that the naked frog leader got behind the frog doing the penetration and began to thrust with all his strength.

"Hey! I'm not a bottom! That hurts!... Wait, aren't we supposed to be using lube or something...?"

The leader keep thrusting. "In all the erotic stories the original Ranito read they never give much attention to those things! They just fuck raw!"

Ranito observed the strange fuck-train of frogs poorly attempting to hump each other. It was a pitiful sight.

"I'm getting tired..." Said the one in the middle. "This feels like physical exercise."

The one in the front also complained. "I'd love to be the one doing the humping... Your cock can't barely get through my buttchecks anyway. Can this even be called a penetration?"

"B-b-b-b-but we all have the exact same cock..."

The leader ignored them. "Oh... I'm about to cum!... Eventually! Maybe in half an hour or so...!"

Ranito was getting ashamed of himself. "I can't keep watching this..." He turned around and found himself facing... himself. It was the Ranito with the briefs that had been in the bathroom.

"You're quite the voyeur, don't you? First you surprise me in the bathroom and now you're watching #03, #06 and #09 having an orgy... Well, if you can call it that... You're the creepiest of us all if I'm honest."

"W-w-w-w-what are you talking about?! Why are so many Ranitos in the house? I just woke up ten minutes ago and suddenly there's so many me!"

"Geez... You really didn't pay attention at all during yesterday's briefing, don't you? Come with me, we need to talk."

Ranito and... Ranito went upstairs to the living room. The four Ranito's watching TV had moved on to the kitchen and were currently arguing who should taste-test the cake when it's done. Both Ranitos sat down on the sofa. The sofa was cold on his bare butt but it appeared that all his clothes had been claimed by other Ranitos. Ranito knew he was identical to all other Ranitos but he couldn't help to feel ashamed of being naked in front of them.

"Look," the Ranito with the briefs explained. "Today is the original Ranito's birthday. We have been created to make his day memorable. All of us were assigned tasks and numbers yesterday, but amazingly you managed to sleep through all of it..."

Ranito calmed down a bit. He still didn't know who had made all these clones, but it seems like whoever did just wanted him to have fun on his birthday. "What did you just say about numbers?"

The Ranito wearing briefs stood up from his seat, turned around, and lowered his briefs.

"W-w-w-woah! I didn't ask you to moon me!" Ranito cried out.

"It's not that!" The other Ranito yelled, ashamed. "Look at my left buttcheek!"

"Uh?" Ranito noticed there was something scribbled on it with shaky penmanship. "#21..."

The other Ranito put his briefs back on. "Yes, that's our identification number, so to speak. We are ordered by number of creation. It was made with a simple permanent marker, but it should last about three baths, which is more baths than we'll be able to take in all our lives..."

Ranito was offended by that last comment. "Hey, my hygiene isn't *that* poor..."

"Uh? No, no. I meant it literally. We clones age very rapidly. We were born yesterday as tadpoles and shipped here in a small cardboard box. By midnight, we'll all be dead by old age."

"Really? That's very sad..."

"Kind of. But it's ok, we're all just copies of the original Ranito. If we can at least make our master happy for a day, our lives will have been meaningful." #21 smiled at Ranito,

Ranito's cheeks turned pink. "That's a very noble cause to live for. I'm actually flustered by all of this..."

"Haha, it's ok. As long as the original Ranito is happy, we'll be happy. Just remember that."

Ranito would definitely enjoy this day, not just for himself, but for all his clones' sake. "Thank you so much, really."

"I wonder if #18 is finished with the cake. I'm gonna go check..." #21 said.

"Oh, by the way!" Ranito stopped #21 from leaving just yet. "Can anybody of you lend me some clothes, by any chance?"

"Ah!" #21 exclaimed. "Sorry, but as you can guess from looking at me..." He pointed to the dirty briefs he was wearing. "There wasn't enough clothes for all of us..."

Ranito understood that, he didn't own that many changes of clothing himself. But... "Still, the original Ranito deserves them the most, right?"

"Yes, you're right." #21 agreed, yet he looked perplexed. "But what does that have anything to do with you?"

Ranito stammered. "W-w-w-well, you know, as the original Ranito, I should..."

To his surprise, #21 burst out laughing. "Seriously? Do you really believe that? Have you seen your fat naked ass on the mirror lately?" And after leaving that cryptic question to Ranito, #21 headed to the kitchen.

"Wait... No, it can't be..." Ranito felt a pit opening up inside him. He hurried up the stairs in a panic and locked himself in the bathroom. He took a deep breath and mooned his own reflection on the mirror. His sweating face turned around and looked with fear at his reflected buttcheek...

#26.

***

"Yeesh, I'm exhausted." The frog wearing fresh summer clothing which obscured the "#17" painted on his buttcheek complained. #18 and him had been working hard on baking the chocolate cake... Which only Ranito #02 had the pleasure to taste-test. "That damn frog, he treats us like that because his number is way lower than us... Ugh! As if that made him superior or something." The seventeenth clone went out to the garden and plopped down on the grass.

#18, wearing his warm winter clothing, sat down next to him. "Well, I've heard that clones with lower numbers have a lower chance to turn out defective, so maybe it's for the best." The shy frog embraced his own arms. "I've heard from #21 that #26 has memory issues... He doesn't remember yesterday's briefing and believes himself to be the original Ranito..." #18's face grimaced with worry. "What if that means... That I'm more disposable and worthless than you...?"

#17 looked up at #18. His shy little 'brother' seemed to be in the verge of tears. "T-t-that's not true at all!" The frog in summer clothing objected to that crazy idea. "We're all the same! No one of us is worth more than the other! We're all Ranito's clones, we were all created with the same end! And besides, you are... Uh... Nevermind."

#18 was motivated by his older companion's speech, but he was curious about that last part. "I'm what...?"

The face of #17 got all red. "W-w-w-well, I think you're cuter than the other clones. Maybe it's just the clothes, but you struck out to me as more 'protectable' than the others..."

"Oh, really?" #18 was embarrassed. "Protectable? What does that mean?"

"Uh... It's just that when I look at you I really want to protect you for some reason... B-b-but it doesn't necessarily mean that...!"

#18 held #17's hands. "It's ok, I actually...feel the same thing towards you..."

"BOOOOOOOOO! Hey, why don't you two kiss already?!" A small cockroach suddenly appeared between the two lovebirds. The little thing seemed mad.

"W-what the hell?!" #17 got startled and was about to crush the disgusting thing with his hand when #18 stopped him.

"No, don't kill it, that's Ranito #25!"

"What...?!" #17 Looked at the small insect. The chubby cockroach turned around and stuck its ass out at the two frogs. Effectively, there was a small #25 written on the lower part of its back.

"I'm sick of all of you Ranitos having so much fun around me! I'm a Ranito clone as well, don't I deserve a little love too?! Yeah, sure, I turned out as the wrong species, but my mind is not defective at all! I'm a bona-fide Ranito! With all of his memories and talents! Want me to write an erotic story about talking penises? I can do it no problem...! Hey! Where are you two going?! No, don't close the garden door! ...Fuck."

***

#02 went over to answer the front door. "Yikes, the original Ranito is here already?! Dammit! #06 and #09, stop sucking each other's dicks and get the table ready! #17 and #18, get the cake! #03, enough with the porn and get the motherfucking candles!..."

"Shouldn't I wash my hands first?" #03 asked.

#21 patted #02's chubby head. "Hey, don't worry so much. Everything will be fine. It's Ranito we're talking about. We were made for him."

Even so, #02 couldn't help but feel nervous. As the clone with the lowest number, he had a lot of responsibilities to take. After a few breaths, he opened the door and there he saw Ranito.

Ranito was wearing his usual clothes. His signature black-framed glasses, a blue jacket that let his belly hang out, brown shorts and his ridiculous-looking beach sandals. Ranito looked at all his clones and gave out a short speech. "Uh...He-hello..."

#02 went over and shook the original Ranito's hands with too much enthusiasm. "Finally, you came back! We've all been working very hard for your birthday party! Specially me!"

Lots of the other Ranitos complained that they weren't being given enough credit, but Ranito seemed happy. "W-w-well... I'm glad you worked so hard, everyone... I appreciate all you've done for me..." He seemed shy as ever, but all the other Ranitos cheered at hearing the original Ranito complimenting them.

"Did you hear?! He thanked *me*!" Said #06 in excitement.

"He thanked all of us, you delusional idiot..." Reprimanded #21.

Ranito got into the living room and the other Ranitos invited him to sit down on the sofa.

"So, tell us, big guy! How was the escape room event?!"

"It was very fun!" Ranito's eyes lit up. "Together, we were 9 Ranitos in total. The time limit was 9 hours and the escape room had 9 doors to open up...!" The other Ranitos listened closely. "And of course, I won. Although I have the impression that the other eight Ranitos let me win just because I'm the original one... But it was exciting nonetheless!"

All the Ranitos in the house were looking up at the original Ranito like he was some kind of action hero... Except one.

It was a Ranito that had woken up later than all the others and also was the only one of them to not be wearing a single article of clothing. It was Ranito #26.

#26 still couldn't get over the fact that he was a clone. A fake that was destined to die that same night. However, he still had a glimmer of hope inside him...

The nude clone got close to the original Ranito and asked him if he could make an important question. The original Ranito, shy and fearful of the apparently very important matter, stood up and faced the clone. He didn't seem to be too concerned about clone #26's lack of clothing. In fact #26 seemed more self-conscious than the original Ranito was at the moment.

"Well, you see," #26 began to say. "I was wondering about that crack on the wall, doesn't it look dangerous?"

"U-uh?" Ranito turned around and examined the wall. "I don't see any cracks..."

"Well, *I* do!" #26 then with a quick motion pantsed the original Ranito.

All the other clones were gasping in shock. The original Ranito covered his crotch and began to yell and cry when he realized the 'crack' down his back was showing.

Even though it had been #26's own idea, he felt devastated when he stared at the original Ranito's buttocks.

"...There's... No number..."

#26 couldn't believe it. The original Ranito's buttcheeks were completely green. That meant that there was absolutely no doubt that this frog was the original Ranito.

"But I... I was completely sure he was lying...!" #26 thought.

Luckily for #26, all the other clones thought it was just a harmless prank. It was something Ranito would definitely do in one of his fantasies, so they didn't reprimand him too much.

The original Ranito, however, looked a bit pissed off. As was #21. The twenty-first clone went next to #26 internal ears and whispered:

"Don't blow it, clone number twenty six. Another prank and you'll be expelled from the birthday party."

#26 was sure he meant it.

***

Being expelled from what you initially thought was going to be your own birthday party would be definitely sad, so #26 made sure not to 'blow it' after that. He was still afraid of what was going to happen to him come midnight, though.

It got dark outside. The original Ranito smiled and croaked merrily when they brought him the big chocolate birthday cake. "I know you made it for me, but I'd like to share it with all of you... Oh, #26, there's not enough for you, I hope you don't mind." Ranito looked at #26 with a hint of malice in his eyes.

"It's fine... I'm n-not hungry anyway..." #26 lied. Damn, that cake looked tasty.

#02 suddenly got pissed off at #03. "Hey, I thought I told you to grab the candles! You useless piece of green shit!"

#03 began to hastily apologize. But the original Ranito wasn't mad. "It's ok, on the way back from the escape room I bought something fun we could use instead." Ranito took out a big pink candle out from his pocket and inserted it deep into the cake.

"Woahhh! Hahaha!" The Ranitos laughed. The candle was shaped like a human penis.

"I thought it would be fine... to 'blow' something like that..." Ranito chuckled a bit at his own joke.

All clones except #26 croaked out a happy birthday song to the original Ranito, who blushed in embarrassment. After the embarrassed frog blew the candle it was finally time to cut the cake in slices. #26 thought about his amazingly bad luck. He was the only one being left out from having cake.

"So good!" #17 croaked with pure bliss.

"I know, I taste-tested it before, so it's all thanks to me!" #02 declared.

"Jerk..." #21 said with his mouth full.

"You know what's a pity?" #18 asked. "The fact that the other 8 clones who went with the original Ranito to play in the escape room missed out from having some cake."

#26 had thought about that, but didn't give it much importance. After all, there wouldn't be enough cake for all those hungry frogs in any case.

But clone #03 thought it was weird. "Now that I think about it... Ranito, why did you come back alone? Shouldn't the other 8 clones have accompanied you back home?"

#02 thought it was an absurd question to make. "Well, Ranito was the one who completed the game first, so most probably they're still trying to get out from the escape room..."

Ranito laughed. "Nah, that's not it." He smiled as he looked at the clones. "I just smuggled in a gun into the game and shoot all of them down once the doors closed. It was so easy. They'd do anything to please the original Ranito. They believed so much in me that they fell into all my traps."

Some of the clones chuckled a bit. "Haha, nice joke..."

"Clone number #12 was so fun to kill. He was the last one to die. He'd gotten so scared by all the blood he'd seen... The way he screamed for the doors to open before I shoot him in the back of the head... Priceless."

The clones were becoming increasingly agitated. "Ranito," #02 said. "You're going a bit too far, you're scaring us..."

#18 was so scared he felt like he was about to puke at any second. "#17, he's joking right?" #17 couldn't bring himself to answer.

"I don't feel good... Like at all..." #06 stated. He clutched his stomach and slowly let himself drop down to the floor.

"Hahaha, it's alright." Ranito stated. "All clones must die tonight. That's what the briefing stated, right? So you shouldn't feel bad if I decide to kill some of you a little sooner than that."

#26 was scared as fuck. He really, really wished this was all a comeback prank for the pantsing from earlier.

"But..." Ranito continued. "While it's true that all clones aged rapidly into Ranito's current age there's no evidence clones would continue aging until they died by old age by tonight. Sorry if I was being a bit misleading when I gave you that briefing!" Ranito smiled. And then he started to cough loudly. His voice was becoming a bit hoarse.

#02 really got pissed off. "So when you said us clones wouldn't last longer than a day and a half you didn't meant we'd die of old age, but that you'd murder us?!"

The remaining frogs were becoming increasingly agitated. "I refuse to believe it!" #03 objected. "Ranito is not some sadistic frog who'd create twenty-five copies of himself just so he could kill them all for entertainment!"

"That's right, #03!" #02 said. "This monster... He couldn't possibly be Ranito! Quick, #03, restrain him!" But when he looked at #03 the clone was laying on the floor clutching his belly. "What the..." #02 felt his own belly growling in pain. He glanced at the other clones, all of them were in pain except for #26. "The cake... It was poisoned?! Impossible, I taste-tested it!"

#26 was surrounded by moaning Ranitos falling into the floor in pain. The naked frog was astonished. "That damn jerk... When he inserted the penis-shaped candle into the cake he was actually injecting poison!" He looked at the Ranito chuckling to himself. "Using a penis-shaped object was a cheap trick! How you dare take advantage of my fondness of phallic symbols?!"

Ranito stood up. He looked at the frogs moaning in pain on the floor with disdain. "Who cares, they're just clones... Nobody's going to miss them..." Ranito traversed the pile of collapsed bodies towards #26, stepping on the face of some of them in the process.

#02 consciousness was about to fade away forever. "#26... Run...!" Were his last words before his pupils lost all trace of life.

#26's green legs were shaking like jello but the clone obeyed his brother's last wish and stormed out through the front door. Ranito just followed his trail with a calm expression on his face. He knew exactly where the frog would hide.

The clone was running as fast as he'd ever ran. He didn't even bother covering his yellow crotch anymore, his small prick swaying from side to side like a stray worm. His moobs were sweating bullets, but he couldn't give up. He had to honor his brothers' merciless deaths.

He found the perfect place to hide: a dumpster full of black trash bags. If he climbed inside, closed the lid and put the trash bags on him as an extra measure of protection he'd never be found!

Or so he thought.

"Hey what the fuck, this is my dumpster, go get your own!" Yelled a chubby cockroach next to the hidden frog.

"What the...?" #26 was surprised by the talking insect.

"My dumpster is in such a sweet spot." The bug with '#25' scribbled on his butt kept rambling on. "It's in a dark corner yet it's a walking distance from home! I'm not giving it to anyone! Much less to another of you froggy clones! You prudes act like I'm not of you because I'm a...!"

Suddenly the dumpster lid got opened. Ranito smiled at #26 and #25. "I knew you'd hide in here... You're so predictable, me."

Both the nude frog and the cockroach looked at Ranito with terror. Ranito laughed so hard he croaked, but his croaking was much more sinister and ominous than Ranito could've ever possibly croak. The fiend then took out something from his pocket.

"C'mon, it's time to finally put an end this."

***

Hank G. Hawk's legs were exhausted after all that sex. Yet his huge hard cock was still yearning for more. Oh fuck, this birthday party was going so perfectly. And the best was about to come.

All his friends were over at The Beavers' concert, but he had excused himself into the room he had been assigned by the nudist's resort staff. He'd just had a foursome but he had asked the nude hotties to leave for a moment because he needed to make a phone call.

He searched the drawers and took out a very old-fashioned pink feature cellphone. It was only able to place and receive calls from a certain contact. "Hehehe, it's almost midnight. I wonder how the fat fag is doing... He must be scared shitless by now, or worse. Teehee."

The nude and sensually muscular hawk placed a call and the recipient answered instantly.

"How did it go?" Asked Hank.

"Open the door." Was the firm answer.

Hank was a bit surprised by the reply. He opened the bedroom door and effectively he saw an obese frog standing still with a very serious expression on his face.

"Woah, I didn't expect you to actually come all the way here... Ranito clone #01."

#01 took the liberty of stepping inside Hank's bedroom. Hank looked at the fat amphibian with disgust. It was his own creation, but still, the clone looked like an ugly nerd.

"This is a nude resort but I guess it's fine if you keep your clothes on..." Hank said trying to make some small talk. "...Anyway, about the others..."

"They're all dead, just as you programmed me to." #01 replied nonchalantly. He opened Hank's closet and looked at the hawk's clothes. There was only one change of clothes but the jacket inside was to the frog's liking. "Nice sports jacket." He said as he took it out.

"Ah, so, all of them dead..." Hank replied.

"I like the writing on it." The frog kept talking about the jacket. It was a sports jacket and in the backside there was 'I'm number one, suckas!' written on it. "It's because I like the number. I like being #01."

"Uh...Yeah..." Hank said awkwardly. Without bothering to ask, the frog took off his signature blue jacket and put on the hawk's sportswear. The frog admired himself on the mirror. He took one of Hank's towels and cleaned off his butt with it, leaving a stain of green foundation on the thing. Then he threw the towel at Hank's face.

"It itched." Said the frog with #01 written on his buttcheek.

"I see..." Hank was getting a bit uncomfortable being around the frog. He'd always been repugnated by those foul-smelling amphibians and he didn't like #01 touching all of his stuff. "...So, all the frogs are gone?"

"Yes."

Hank smiled inwardly. He didn't actually thought the plan would work this perfectly. "Amazing work... You made sure to make it look like the pervert killed himself right? I don't want anybody suspecting me in the slightest."

"Which pervert?" Asked #01.

"Well, you know, hehe." Hank stammered. "The original Ranito..."

Suddenly #01 grabbed the hawk's neck, squishing it until it looked like a noodle.

"I didn't kill the original Ranito." #01 stated coldly.

"W-w-wha..."

"You knew very well that while killing clones is a grey area because of legal technicalities, killing the original person is still murder. Yet you programmed one of the clones to kill all the frogs with a number assigned to them. Did you really think I was stupid enough to kill frog #26, when you only ordered 25 clones to be fabricated?!"

"T-t-that's not true!" The hawk struggled to cry out. "I-I didn't want you to actually kill Ranito, I just wanted to scare him as a birthday prank! I was scared that dirty frog's party would get more guests than mineeeee!"

#01 threw the muscular hawk against the floor. The hawk was really scared. He had altered #01's DNA during its inception to have the sadistic urges of a serial killer. This fucking frog could very well kill him!

"No, you can't do this!" Hank cried out. "My papa owns the research facility who created you... We have a lot of money! In fact all the guests to my party were bribed! I'll give you whatever you want!" The frog loomed menacingly towards the hawk whose penis deflated and dripped some urine. "Just don't kill meeeee!"

"Killing you would be the easy way." The frog said. "I won't rest until I let everyone know about what you attempted to do... Until then, I just want to see you suffer..."

"No! Don't hurt me! I'm too beautiful to be beaten up!" The bird cried.

"I won't beat you up either." The frog answered. "...Yet. For the moment I just want to ruin your reputation."

***

Ranito couldn't believe the day's events. He woke up thinking it was going to be a lonely birthday, then he found a lot of clones of himself, after that he really thought that he was clone #26 himself, then clone #01 disguised as the original Ranito had killed the other frog clones, but at the last moment #01 had spared his life because according to him someone else had programmed him to be a killing machine, and took out from his pocket some keys for a garbage truck.

"I can't believe I'm actually driving... Naked... Without glasses... Nor a license..." Ranito said.

"Watch out with that tree! Ahhhh!" The cockroach known as clone #25 yelled. "Phew... That was close."

Ranito drove the truck to the top of a giant hill. Far away down the hill he could see some sort of concert. "Oh shit, aren't those The Beavers? I wish I had some binoculars."

"Just do what #01 ordered you to do..." Said the cockroach.

Ranito positioned the truck in place. "Ok, this is quite messed up, but if it's part of #01's plan then I hope it accomplishes something..." He took a deep breath and pressed a button on the dashboard. The garbage truck made a heavy sound and dropped its contents down the hill.

Down in Hank's party, the naked guests were wondering where Hank was. "He promised me one thousand if I went to this party and I don't even know who the hell he is yet." Said one. "I heard he's in his bedroom doing a foursome with prostitutes." Said another.

"Hey, what's that?" Yelled one of the guests. He pointed to a mass of something green falling down the hill at high speed. "It's rolling down quite fast..." The Beavers stopped playing their instruments and wondered what was causing that commotion as well.

"They're a lot! Oh fuck, are those frogs?! They're naked!"

"Forget about that... They're DEAD!"

The guests ran away but most of them got caught up in the stampede of dead Ranitos. Clones #02 through #24, all of them now naked, obese and smelly corpses. Each of them with a sticky note glued to their bellies with the written words "Made with pride by the G. Hawk Corporation".

***

"W-What's happening outside?!" Hank screamed like a little girl. He could hear people running away in terror.

#01 croaked evilly. The sadistic frog knew Ranito and the tiny cockroach were done with their part of the job, but he still had private matters to discuss with a certain naked bird.

Hank stood up. "I don't care if I gave you the sadism of a serial killer, your body is still that of a pathetic overweight frog!"

"You're right." #01 coldly replied. "My frog body is so morbidly obese..."

Hank tried to punch the frog, but #01 used all the weight on his body to turn the tables around like a heavyweight pro wrestler.

"N-no way!" Hank cried out in pain.

The frog grabbed Hank in a headlock, burying his beak between his moobs. "I'm so morbidly obese my voluptuous chest could suffocate you to death..."

"Stop, you fucking frog! Your B.O. is disgusting!"

"I know, I'm such a slob..." #01 then dropped his pants and revealed two huge green orbs to the bird. One of the orbs still had the clone's number written on it, but both were equally disgusting to Hank. "N-no, please don't..."

"My B.O. is disgusting, I know. Maybe you should take some fresh air..."

"You bas-" Hank's cries were interrupted by a giant blast of toxic gas. #01 made sure to keep the bird's beak wide open during the whole process.

The bird began to feel sick. When the frog lessened his grip Hank dropped to the floor, powerless and almost unconscious.

Almost. Because before he could take the privilege of passing out #01 still wanted more revenge.

"I'm such a pathetic nerd." #01 stated. His voice was serious and monotone. "I'm nothing against a muscle stud like you, with your huge pectorals..." The frog caressed them. "Your hard-as-rock abs..." The frog ran his slimy hands down them. "And your big wang..."

Hank yelped when he felt his long flaccid penis being grabbed unceremoniously. It wasn't sensual at all. The hands handling his genitals were cold and methodical. And a fucking frog was doing it all.

"Why doesn't it get hard? Are you scared?" #01's disturbing monologue continued. "Am... i... Not good enough for you? Is that why you didn't invite me to your birthday party? That's it?"

"Shut up!" Hank yelled, but his voice had no strength at all.

#01 held the deflated sausage with his fingers. Then he whipped out his own yellow penis for a comparison. "I'm nothing compared to you... You're... A real man..."

"ARRRRRGHHHH!" Hank screamed. His testicles were being mercilessly crushed by the frog's fat fingers. "STOOOOOP! PLEASE ANYTHING BUT-!"

Expecting that reaction, the frog put a slimy finger inside Hank's open beak.

"Suck."

Hank was in tears. Feeling utterly powerless he sucked the amphibian finger. He could taste the sweat, the slime, the slippery frog skin... The bird felt so humiliated.

"That's a good birdie." The frog petted Hank's head.

Hank felt devastated. His will had been broken.

"The worst part is over." #01 said. His words were reassuring, but his voice was cold. "Now just relax, I know you are disgusted by frogs, but all that struggling made me grow a boner. That's the thing you're sucking next."

Hank kept on sucking and licking #01's finger with a whimper.

"I wonder why you dislike fat frogs so much. Most probably you're just scared of them. You're always showing off but deep down you are still a scared little fledgling. You're going to have a hard time when it's time to leave the nest..." #01 removed his finger and rammed his hard cock inside the crying bird's beak. "...Pathetic."

***

When the police eventually got inside Hank's bedroom they found that the whole room had been ransacked. They found a shivering bird hidden in the closet completely in the nude. His face showed evidence of having been in some sort of fight and his feathers were full of dried semen, but realizing the police were investigating the frog bodies the hawk opted to remain silent and so the uniformed men brought the humiliated naked bird into custody.

Hank G. Hawk's reputation plummeted after that. His father ended up in prison and G. Hawk Corporation was closed down after it was found out they were conducting illegal experiments. Out in the street and without a dime, the young bird wouldn't be able to bribe anyone for a really long time.

"So what are you going to do now?" Ranito asked #01 at sunrise. The original frog had finally gotten his signature clothes and glasses back and his clone now wore a sports jacket that had previously belonged to Hank.

"I have no other choice but to disappear. I need to figure out if Hank's programming is still inside my head. I could still be dangerous... Most probably, I am." He said. "So while I may share all your memories until now, from now on I want to have my own life."

Ranito seemed sad but #01 smiled and handed him a pink feature cell phone.

"Feel free to call me if you ever find yourself in trouble." #01 said. "Or if you find some good TFs on the net."

"Will do!" Ranito promised.

"I want to have my own life as well." The cockroach chimed in. "I know you'll miss me a lot..."

"Err... Yeah, sure... A lot..." Ranito reassured the bug without much confidence.

Ranito waved at the two clones as they left towards the horizon. It had been an hectic few days and he had lost a lot of clones along the way, but in the end he had met new friends and that was the best birthday gift the frog could've ever wish for.