Get Bit: Make Lycanthropy Work for You!

Story by FakeMan on SoFurry

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A quick smutty infomercial on how to become a muscular gay werewolf.


Disclaimer - Please consult your doctor before joining the Get Bit Program. Side effects may include wet mouth, floof, happiness, lewd pornography, weird commercials, uncontrollable desire to bark after people ring the doorbell, lycanthropy, pack mentality, ties that last for more than 30 minutes, wardrobe loss, snoot boops, dramatic muscle gain, science, and quackery. (This is work of pornographic fiction. Do not read if it would be illegal for you to do so.)

Get Bit: Make Lycanthropy Work for You!

Blurred buzzy music that sounds like it belongs in a low budget 1970s sitcom comes on as the screen crackles to life.

"Have you tried everything to get in shape?" a gruff deep voice that sounds like gravel drizzled with chocolate sauce asks.

The camera follows a skinny jogger through the park, his drenched white sweatband clinging to his glistening sandy-brown skin.

"Are fad diets just not working for you?" The low voice queries melodramatically.

The image leaps to the same jogger seated at a table, still clad in his yellow tank top and deep purple jogging shorts. He's somewhat perplexed, looking at the whole carrot that he has skewered with a fork before turning almost like he's looking for the source of the disembodied voice in his dining room.

"Has modern technology let you down?" that same seductively rich voice enquires.

The jogger looks startled, suddenly finding himself on a treadmill going slightly too fast. He leans forward and braces himself, arms clad in various watch-like devices, each with a tangle of connected wires trailing off to a large computer that belongs in an evil lab from a B movie. The jogger looks up towards the vector graphics display as the incline increases. There are hundreds of flashing numbers: heart rate, mortgage rate, resting blood pressure, satisfaction, phenotype . . . The bottom flashes with a message in bold red letters: WORTH IT = NEGATIVE.

"Well now there's an easier way."

The screen wipes to the side, revealing an infomercial set that looks cobbled together from every genre of cheap television. There's a table with fruits and vegetables on one side and a rack of weights on the other, with a somewhat wrinkled blue velvet curtain in the back.

An impossibly muscular humanoid wolf in gym shorts struts onto the screen from the right. His sleeveless shirt stretches over his chiseled chest, making the grey fur around his neck puff out into a fluffy mane. "Our new Get Bit Fitness Program will give you the body that you've always dreamed of, without any of that _unnecessary_stress," His strange animal mouth syncs up perfectly with the deep alluring voice.

He flexes casually, muscles bunching up under his slate fur. "It's as easy as picking up the phone, and then all of this . . ." he leans his fully lupine face to the side and kisses a bicep. "Can be yours."

At this point, a pair of paws pushes the same jogger from the park onto the soundstage from offscreen. The dark-haired man stumbles forwards, squinting at the bright lights and looking around with the paranoid air of someone stuck in a strange dream. His eyes go wide as he stares up at the buff wolf smiling down at him with a predatory grin, a good head and a half taller than the human. The man's mouth moves, but he's far enough away from any microphone that his voice comes out as a vague questioning buzz.

"That's right." The wolf's deep voice croons as he grabs the still sweaty man by the arm and drags him towards the center of the stage as if he weighed nothing. "Our patented process will have you in howling good shape in no time." He grins, deep voice seeping through the speakers of the outdated TV.

The man pulls back against the wolf's paw, but he only has as much effect as a fishing weight trying to anchor a cruise ship.

"Now as you can see, our lucky example here is a little scrawny." The wolf lifts up one of the man's arms by the sweatband, squeezing around the muscles while making a faint chastising click with his tongue. "But after an application of our patented Get Bit formula . . ." He whirls the mystified man around, hugging the human's back against his chest. The wolf cranes his neck down against the man's shoulder, dark nose huffing before he laps up with his wide pink tongue, and then closes his jaws, nicking the tip of the constrained man's ear between his sharp white fangs.

The jogger doesn't seem to enjoy this, his muffled protests vrring through the speakers as the wolf holds him tight, licking up a drop of blood from the man's ear before it stops bleeding in seconds. "There. That wasn't so bad, was it?" The wolf's tail wags behind him as the man slowly stops struggling against him, wide brown eyes blinking slowly as if dazed. The jogger's breaths are coming deep and fast before the wolf leans in over him again, pressing his muzzle down and lapping over the man's face before being coaxed into a strange vertical kiss, the lewd sloppy laps popping through the TV's old speakers.

By the time the trainer pulls back, the jogger's eyes are flecked with bronze, his skin flushed as his lengthening tongue laps out over his lips.

"Now, as you can see, the Get Bit program is already having an effect," the wolf's smooth baritone narrates as the man pulls back and turns to face him, eyes closing as his nose begins to darken. "Once the process is started, the rest is easy . . ."

The man's shoulders creak wider as he leans in and buries his face against the wolf's fluffy neck, sucking in a deep breath of his apparently addictive scent. The wolf grins out at the camera as he slowly begins to press down on the man's shoulders, guiding him lower.

"The gains start to happen immediately." He brushes his paws against the side of the man's head, pinching his cheeks as they sprout fluffy patches of black fur. "Not only that, but you'll find that there are all kinds of other useful benefits. Better hearing . . ." His leather padded fingers tug the man's ears up into ebony furred twitching points. "An attractive complexion." He strokes the man's face as it begins to creak out, whiskers straining out as the wolf's claws stroked to either side of his darkening canine nose. "And, of course, an increase in . . . appetite." His fingers scritch at the man's head as it sinks down, dark leathery nostrils huffing as he presses his face in against the bulge in the wolf's black nylon athletic shorts.

The wolf casually hooks a clawed thumb under his elastic waistband and tugs down his shorts, continuing to talk to the camera as the changing man shoves his forming snout against his plump furry sheath. "Of course, with the body of your dreams, you'll find that you'll develop an appreciation for other's bodies as well." A growl creeps into his deep molasses voice as the man's tongue slides out over his crotch, pink rasp sliding out a bit longer and more flexible with each lap. The wolf rests a hand on the top of the man's head, scratching idly between his twitching ears as a carmine tip begins to pulse out from his animal sheath, basted in affection by the forming wolf before him.

A thick floof of ebony fur tinged with brown wafts in around the jogger's neck, draped over the edge of his tank top as he single-mindedly slathers the emerging member in hungry affection, gleaming eyes widening as the wolf's impressive knot squeezes out from his taut sheath.

"But the upper body isn't the only thing that the Get Bit Program is good for." The wolf grits his fangs as he firmly pulls the changing man up and away from his erect canine member. "You can expect gains for your lower body as well." His muscles clench under his fur as he guides the wriggling human over towards the table covered in a random assortment of fruit, bending him over it so that his purple nylon covered rump faces the camera.

The wolf wraps his wide paws around the man's waist, eliciting a faint moan as the human's spread arms knock a pineapple and some bananas to the stage floor. Slowly, he tugs down the jogger's shorts, a grin spreading over his lupine features as he pinches the man's ass, seeing the muscles clench beneath his smooth brown skin. "Although this is lovely, with the Get Bit Program, there's always room for improvement." He kneads his fingers against the man's rump, black soft fur starting to filter down from underneath the increasingly stretched tank top. "Just wonderful," the wolf sighs as if viewing a work of art. "But even muscles as toned as these need some accentuation."

The wolf kneels down, licking his chops and giving the camera a wink. His hands spread the man's increasingly furry ass cheeks apart before he presses his muzzle in, whiskers twitching before he slides his pink tongue up against the straining fleshy ring of the man's bared asshole. A rain of plums and apples clatter to the floor as the man's growing body stiffens, his back arching. The wolf's sloppy laps pop through the speakers, slippery tongue straining as the man's muscles twinge and quiver. A distant moan of relief rings out behind a strange fleshy crack as the man's flesh bulges and his spine creaks out.

Black fur with a strip of brown along the top fluffs in along the forming fitfully tugging tail. The wolf grabs the lengthening appendage and pulls it up, the camera slowly zooming in as he passionately makes out with the man's increasingly animal ass. The muscles bulge under the jogger's plush rump as it swells, fur standing on end, fluffing out as it races down his legs. His thighs shorten slightly as his heels strain against his running shoes, claws eventually ripping through the leather as his toes swell out into wide padded paws.

"Yes, not only is the process fast, but we can guarantee that you'll enjoy it as well." The strong grey wolf looks back over his shoulder and winks a golden eye. He rubs a padded finger against the man's glistening asshole, letting the dark fluffy length of the human's tail whap from side to side as a distant whine creeps into the audio.

"As you can see, we've already achieved some lovely definition." He runs his paws up under the man's shirt, squeezing in at his swelling pecs, pulling the human's growing body up against his own towering form.

"But our product can do even more to help accentuate your best features." He grinds forwards with his hips, sliding his red marbled cock against the ebony fur of the man's lower back. The grey wolf is only a few inches taller than the man now, though considerably more muscular as he holds the increasingly animal black furred creature against himself. "Because _we_go the extra mile to change you from the inside out."

The man reaches up and grabs the wolf's paws wrapped around his barreling chest as the massive muscular creature adjusts himself, lifting the man up to the tips of his swelling paws as the deep voiced canine rubs his turgid canine cock between the jogger's tail and rounded fluffy rump. The once-human tenses up, forming muzzle open wide, tongue lolling out to the side as the wolf slides the chiseled tip of his member under the freshly formed tail. Pliant slickened ass straining, the man's eyes squeeze shut as the wolf's tapered shaft shoves slowly into him, inch after inch.

"That's right." The wolf bucks his hips, cock sliding into the tight clenching confines of the new wolf's rear until his knot butts against the clenched ring of straining muscle.

"Not only does our patented program increase your strength . . ." his butter smooth voice continues as he rams savagely forwards again, the changing wolf wriggling in his grip.

"But also, significantly, increases, your flexibility." He punctuates each of his words with another rocking shove, a deep growl building in his chest as he pulls the man back and shoves his hips forwards. The man yelps, coppery eyes flying wide open as that fist sized knot of flesh sinks inside of his ass with a fleshy thump. A deep pleased growl interrupts the trainer's spiel as he bucks against the man, knot tugging at the tight hot insides as the changing human's tail flaps blissfully about against his toned belly.

"In addition to such a, tight physique," his deep voice is broken by the occasional canine pant as the man's whines of pleasure fill the background. "You'll find that there will be other perks in the bedroom." One of the trainer's paws traces down towards the man's exposed still-human member as the other rises up, brushing through his now thick neck ruff. The grey wolf slides a thick padded finger into the corner of the man's lupine jaws and the changing wolf's thinning black lips close around it as he starts to suck at the digit with a muffled groan. The claws of the grey wolf's other paw trace down the edge of the man's throbbing cock before cupping his testicles and giving the swelling orbs a tight squeeze as downy black fur prickles in.

"That's right." He licks his tongue up over his own huffing black nose. "With the Get Bit Program, you can be sure that you'll delight your lover." His claws trace around the base of the man's jerking cock as rivulets of pre began to leak down. A roll of soft furry flesh wells up, enveloping the member in a loose dark sheath that begins to swell as the man's cock grows larger and more animal. The trainer then takes the slick shaft in a paw and squeezes just hard enough to dimple the reddening flesh before beginning to pump slowly up and down, making the new black furred wolf squirm in pleasure.

The changing man yaps out as the base of his cock swells in the wolf's grip, a taut reddish bulb of flesh spreading the trainer's lupine fingers around itself. The grey wolf grins as his demonstration partner rocks back into him, sensitive passage squeezing as the knot locked inside of him tugs back and presses in over and over. It mashes against something tight and hot that sends charges of pleasure lancing through him, his black fur pricking up and standing on end.

The grey wolf grins, pumping down one last time before squeezing in at his new partner's knot in a vice-like grip. "With your sexy new body, you'll have enough stamina to keep your lover seeing stars again, and again, and again . . ." The grey wolf's tail flutters behind him as his ponderous testicles pull up against his body. His howl is quickly joined by that of the new wolf, whose exposed canine member jerks and begins to splash out hot sticky ropes of seed with each repetition of tender words that the wolf whispers into his pointed ears.

With every hot sticky dollop, the new wolf's body swells out, muscles gaining mass and enough definition to be seen through his thick luscious pelt. His paws widen, braced against the floor as he sucks at the grey wolf's padded finger like it was a candy spun from raw sexuality. In their collective exuberance, an errant string of thick pearlescent wolf cum whips out and spatters against the lens of the camera.

Things go out of focus, shaking around as a paw reaches in with a terrycloth and wipes the string of seed from the other side of the screen.

Both muscular wolves stand there panting, still tied fast together. The grey wolf nuzzles in against the back of his transformed partner's neck before looking up straight into the camera again with a cocksure grin. "Get Bit: The Better Way to Get the Body You Want."

The darker wolf yawns, pink tongue curling up as he leans his burly lupine body back against the trainer's broad chest. The buzzy infomercial music increases in volume as the screen fades to blue with yellow text.

JUST CALL THE FOLLOWING NUMBER FOR MORE INFORMATION ON A GET BIT CENTER NEAR YOU

The image shutters, rolling bands of horizontal distortion flowing down the screen as the sound pops and fizzes. The image flashes bright white that quickly contracts into a shrinking iris with the crackling of static as the screen goes blank.