Life, Love, and Sex as a Pokemon: Fell in Love with a Charmandress Pt. 1

Story by Jay-rawr on SoFurry

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Well, Colt and I were partners now. We agreed however, that we both could have fun with anyone else, and we didn't have any kind of pact with each other. Nonetheless, I love 'im to death and looked forward to the many nights we'd spend together in the future.

In the mean time, I wanted to explore more options. So I hit up the nearby Party Lounge. The Pokémon here have no problem with using human equipment. We've got TV, PC's, Xbox, and thank the lord, Music.

I will admit, it was a BITCH to learn guitar again with only three claws. The guitar I have now is actually a full scale acoustic, but I modified it to have a neck made of 2 ukulele necks, and it STILL had 6 strings. Yet I taught myself again, and it's been great for gathering a crowd.

Anyway, I thought it was time to see how the rest of the Pokémon did with music. "Please let there be raves, PLEASE let there be raves." I thought to myself, as I entered the lounge. I showed the Hitmonlee outside the door my pass and he let me in. I got in and groaned. It was that damn Mr. Mime's Country Chime band... again. The manager of this lounge absolutely loves em, but Father Almighty, they're MIMES!!! Well, I did check out the bulletin board, and there was to be a "No ID Night" at the lounge next week.. They're basically for teenagers that like to club and pretend to drink alcohol. (All the drinks have the names and taste of booze, only without any real booze. They were really kind of tacky to anyone older than 20, and was pretty intense for anyone younger than 18. I thought about it, but not long. I was going. Not quite a rave, but sometimes you've gotta walk before you run.

In the mean-time I checked in with my human family at home with a webcam on my little netbook. My little brother was attending a school away from home, and my parents were still in that old house. My parents were the same as I left them. They still hated me for being who I was and for my sexual preference, and who refuses to come home, but eventually I got to talking to them about better things, and ended our conversation well. My brother on the other hand was also the same. Totally envious for me being a Pokemon, and wishing he too could somehow transform into one and join me. I was happy he didn't know his brother was indeed NOT the innocent, harmless charmander he looks like. Last thing I want my bro to tell his friends is "my brother's a crazy party-loving bisexual charmander." Eventually I hung up on him and got ready to go over to Colt's to watch the human's Winter Olympics.

Don't get me wrong, I love Colt very much, and he's as sexy as hell, but I wanted someone else. I sat in bed one night at my house and thought of who... I was just as attracted to females as I was males. It just happened to play out Colt came along before I got a nice girl. I decided I'd let it be and let it play out. If I found a good girl, great. If I found another good guy, great. But I did want more people in my life other than Colt.

I went over to Colt's House just to play some Xbox and hang out. We ended up playing a lot of Colt's fave, Team Fortress 2.( The Winter Olympics got real old, real fast) I told him there was the party at the lounge tomorrow, but he said he was going snowboarding with his cousin. We enjoyed the rest of the night, no sex, just laughs, some cuddling, and Team Fortress 2.

The next day was long. I got so excited about the party that night every minute went by like an hour. Not even Call of Duty made time fly faster. Colt stopped by to say bye for his skiing trip, but other than that, I was alone. I could have called friends over, but something just kept my sitting with my tail between my legs, poking my belly button with it. (Because when you get bored, and you have a tail, you have a tendency to poke your belly button with it.,, I guess) Any ways, I was at the doors to the lounge as soon as it was opening time. I was the first one there. Second one there was a FEL-AMING flamer vaporean.The thing had a rainbow made out of piercings that went around its collar fin, a Gay Pride T-shirt, ball-strangling skinny-jeans, retro style barber-shop shoes, SHEESH! Seriously, if you're gay, you can take pride, but Christ, don't ADVERTISE IT!!! IT DOESN'T HELP ANYONE! We were the two Pokemon in line, and that damn vaporean was blabbering about random shit in a stupid-obvious, stereotypical fag-voice for what seemed to be hours, as if there were people around to hear him. Me and the poor doorman had to listen to him for a half hour before more and more Pokemon showed up. Even then he just wouldn't shut up. If he weren't a water-type, I'd punch him.

After what seemed like an eternity, the bass could be heard from the other side of the building, the doors swung open, and the rushed in. good timing, too. I was feeling like I was getting fag poisoning.

To my surprise, the party really wasn't all THAT bad. The food and drinks blew Dialga balls, but there were some REALLY nice-looking babes there. I was 17, probably the youngest male there, and I had a very good chance of being younger than a girl if I hooked up with one. Didn't matter to me, though. A score was a score.

I found potential at first with a Squirtle by the food. We talked about some of the chicks there and how he apparently knew most of them and he knew most of them were diva- bitches. I asked to see if he knew if each in every one of em was good in bed.

That was both a joke and a compliment, I liked this Squirtle. He was chubby, but more in a cute way than in a obese way. Also, he was the only pokemon there in a Polo. I liked him, and he caught on. He raised his claw to shake. "DJ." He said. I stood just looking at him for a few seconds, then looked at the DJ behind me, then back to the squirtle, totally dazed. The Squirtle DJ rolled his eyes. "My name. DJ's my name." he said. I just laughed in humiliation and shook his claw. I told him my name. "My buddies call me Jay, though." "Alright, Jay, seeya around." He said walking off into the crowd. I waved. I'll betcha we're going to meet up again.

A bunch of Diva-bitches, huh? I remembered what DJ told me. There was no way that could be true. I went onto the dance floor. The DJ (THEDJ, not the squirtle from before, Iknow, Iknow, the irony almost hurts) was putting on some crazy, trippy techno, and I liked it. I started out doing what most pokemon were doing. Arms in the air, and bouncing with the music. Grinded some girls, nothing big, but every time I hit on someone nice, they turned out to be, indeed, stuck-up, slutty, divas. I even hit on a not-too attractive magmar chick, just to see if they'd turn out to be nicer, and she wasn't. Well, she was nice, I guess,but she was also as high as a fucking KITE.

Well, I was pretty disappointed. Especially when, in hopes of getting some girls, I took off my shirt to dance, and attracted INSTEAD... that vaporean dude from before.

Eventually I just quit. I sat in one of the booths with a soda and just listened to the music. Didn't do me any fuckin good. I groaned and let my head fall onto the smooth surface of the table. I must have just been in that position for a good 10 minutes until I heard a conversation between a shy female voice, and a deep, cocky voice.

"Cmon, girl, I'm just askin for a dance!"

"but I really... I don't know how to dance..."

"don't worry about it! I'll show ya... heh-heh."

I lifted my head up and looked for the sound,

" I said-"

The DJ put on a new track and the conversation was lost in the bass. I got up and walked. Sure enough, there was a big, muscular Croagunk in one of those "imma rape ya if you don't do what I say" poses leaning over a-

bwghhH!!!

Sitting under the brute, in a booth seat, all by herself, was a beautiful, skinny, almost sad-looking female charmander.

" Why won't you dance with me? You embarrassed by those pathetic flat-breasts?"

" just leave me alone!"

" Dance with me, you zero! You're never gonna get asked by anyone else!"

"LEAVE HER ALONE, YOU ASSHOLE!" I yelled as I cracked my knuckles and strode toward him. His surprised, ugly frog eyes whipped straight at me. His poison glands swelled with anger, "Watch it, charmander! Kids get hurt when they get in grown up's shit!" I didn't say anything. I just kept walking toward him. Other Pokemon around us began to gather, knowing a fight was comin. The music kept on playing. I've been in plenty of fights. If I survived a punk-ass grovyle with a knife, this asshole should be no problem. " Lookit the little hero..." The croagunk said as he stepped away from the charmandress and loomed over me by about a half-foot. " You serious right now, You little twerp? You wanna die like this?"

I didn't answer. " No special moves. just a fight." I told him. "Wow, You wanna die slow, huh?" the Croagunk said. I noticed after I said this.... He has no fists, just those damn barbs! He drove one spike back... "ohhh shit." I muttered. I flung myself to the ground as his huge arm whooshed above me. That bastard actually wanted to KILL ME! His barb went up and I quickly rolled as his spike drove into the wood next to me. The crowd of spectating Pokemon gasped.

I got back on my feet about 4 feet away from him.

I nervously, but angrily yelled to him " Just Walk the hell away, and no-one gets hurt!" Man, I must sound like a coward, I thought.

" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOW you realize a fist fight wasn't the best idea, huh?" The croagunk triumphantly yelled back. I reached into my pocket. " I didn't say anything about just fists. I said no Special moves." I pulled my weapon out of my pocket. " I will repeat one last time. Just walk away..." I twirled my butterfly knife through my fingers, then flicked the handle back to expose it, "...and no-one gets hurt." The crowd looked from me to the Croagunk, both of us now using a lethal weapon. The Croagunk looked like he was about to talk before an arc of electricity enveloped him and paralyzed him. Then my body lit up with electricity and I painfully went into paralysis also. The city's chief of police, Magnezone, was restraining us both with one of his magnets with thunderwave.

"I WILL NOT BE HAVING THIS KIND OF VIOLENCE IN MY CITY, YOU PUNKS! BZZ! BZZ! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT!? BZZ?!" he yelled to us so loud it covered the music and his speakers almost blew. He let us go and I flipped my knife back to its folded position. The chief's two cops that stood next to him escorted us out the club, and I had my knife taken. Because I knew Magnezone so well, and the witnesses at the fight reported I was helping someone out, I didn't lose my membership to the lounge, BUT, I had to give up my butterfly knife. Since this wasn't the first time I got in trouble with it.

The Chief brought croagunk back to his house, but let me be in his trust I wasn't going to be any more trouble.

I didn't even get my shirt back. I was standing outside the lounge shirtless, knifeless, and alone. I stuck my claws in my pocket and fished out my real butterfly knife. I always keep a training knife on me in case I have to give it up to the Chief... again. I put it back and started home. I heard behind me the doors to the lounge open, and I turned around to see that charmandress shyly advancing out, then hesitating and turning away as if to seem she just stepped outside for a breath of fresh air. I turned my body around to face her. Silently walking toward her, letting her think I didn't notice her. Her back was to me.

"Hey." I said, putting a friendly smile on my face.

She turned a bit but stayed with her back to me. "....H-...hi." She replied. Her voice without the music was like an acoustic guitar breaking silence. Innocent, cute, and quiet. "Sorry about the whole, uh, knife... thing." I said. She didn't answer.

" Why did you stand up to that guy?" she quietly asked, never turning to face me.

I replied, " well, to be honost, I didn't like him. Aannndd... uh, I...well... I kinda like you, I guess."

I saw her head go upright like she was shot or something.

" W-well...... uh-......thank you."

I took a chance and decided to try acting bad-ass. I simply turned around and answered in a pathetic tough tone, " no problem." And walked on. To her, I'd look like a cowboy walking into a sunset. My front side, however, I was sweating, biting my lips, and had a mother fucking boner, praying she'd say something else.

And by the lord's grace:

"Um..." I heard her start behind me, " Do-Do you maybe want to... uh...."

I turned my head to her, putting that calm, cowboy face back on. "Movie? Saturday? 8:30?" I asked, eagerly. She finally turned to face me. Those beautiful sparkling sky-blue eyes, filled with both nervousness and curiousity, just filled with light. ".....er -yes-Yes! That sounds great! I'll meet you here then!"

"I'll see you then..." I gave her a look to let her know this was a fill-in-the-blank sentence. She caught on. " er, Sabrina." She studdered. I gave her an even bigger grin. " Sabrina..." I repeated. She looked at me with total confusion.... OH CHRIST! SHE THOUGHT I JUST SAID MY NAME WAS SABRINA!!! "ER-" I stammered, " Jay!" She gave an adorable giggle. And waved as I walked over the hill, and went back into the lounge. I waited till I got over thehidden driveway over the hill, in case she was still watching before I ran, screaming with happiness. "YYEEESSSS!!!!!!! YEESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!! SATURDAY! 8:30!!!! MOVIE!!!!!!!! MOOOOVVVIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

I continued this till I got to my house, confusing the fuck out of 8 Pokemon I ran by.