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Author's Note: Thanks to all my friends, watchers, and viewers. You guys are great! This chapter will switch between Malakai's and Rodya's POVs.

Loving and Lusting for My Brother

Chapter 7

Malakai's POV

Our relationship has been going good...for the most part. It's been a few months since we officially started our secret relationship. He loves me deeply; just as much as I love him and the sex is great so what's the problem? Something bothers me. Something I have always known about Rodya and yet refuse to talk to him about. Ever since our high school days, Rodya has always been how should I put this, slutty? Is that a bad thing to say? Probably, but I can't think of a nicer way to put it. He was sexually active before I was and wasn't shy at all like me. He got dates easily and rarely faced rejection. He wasn't one to "kiss and tell", no one knew of his sexcapades except for me. I on the other hand only ever had sex with one guy, a guy who I wished I could forget. I was always the romantic, wanting to find true love and all that shit. Well, I never thought it would be with my own brother, yet that's what happened.

It's these differences that are the base of my problem. He told me that all this sex was just because he felt he couldn't have me. I will admit that had he asked me at, say, 17 if I wanted to fuck him I probably would have told him to go fuck himself. Of course nowadays he can taste the forbidden fruit, our code word for our sexual relationship. Maybe it's because of what he said that made me think he would change his mind about being into open relationships. Now that sex with my brother is a reality, I don't want to share him. My heart sinks every time he says "not tonight" because I know the reason. I know that he probably got his dick sucked or his ass licked after work by some guy I may or may not know.

Is it wrong of me to think I could change him? That having hot, forbidden, incestuous sex could erase his desire to "play the field." I don't want to share him, but what other option is there? It was due to luck that I even got to fulfill my desires, to consummate our love for each other in a way that siblings are never supposed to do. Am I not enough for him? Is that it? Am I just another person on his fuck list? No, it can't be! Oh I don't even know what to do anymore or what to think. Aside from my frustrations life has been good, so why complain, right?

Rodya's POV

I must be the luckiest fox alive! I still can't believe I can finally have sex with my own brother, it still blows my mind. Yet, I still have the desire to have sex with other guys. I don't know if I've been a slut for too long or if I'm just born this way, but I just can't give up my fuck buddies. I always reassure Malakai that I only love him and that's true. I can separate love and sex. I never fell in love with any of the guys I slept with. Malakai has no need to worry. Yet sometimes at night I can see it on his face every time I tell him no. That look of disappointment, I don't think it's just about not getting sex tonight.

I really wish he would find a fuckbuddy or two. Someone to satisfy him when I can't. Ideally I would love to see him get married with a loving husband, but I don't think that's gonna happen. He wants to be exclusive with me, but he knows the law doesn't permit incest, so why does he keep holding on to this dream of us being this idealized fantasy couple when we never can be. He's a hopeless romantic. Just the other night he set the dining room table with roses and candles.

"Who's the lucky fur?" I jokingly said

"You are, handsome" he said, in a voice that had sultry undertones.

"You didn't need to do all this," I said.

"I know, but I want to" he said.

The meal we had that night was simple dollar store pasta and sauce with cheap red wine, over a red tablecloth that had to be older than either of us, yet with the mood lighting and the floral arrangement it felt fancier than it should have been.

Afterwards we had sex. Sex with Malakai tends to be so different than with the other guys. He insists on kissing, something that most of my fuckbuddies would never allow. The way Malakai caresses me, embraces me, and kisses me all over. It's just so deep, so sensual. The other guys just want to get right to the action. When Malakai is on top, as he was that night, he always goes slowly at first, despite my anus being no stranger to cock. I top more than I bottom, but still. Malakai's thrusts do get harder and faster, especially as he reaches climax. I love feeling his pulsating member as he shoots his load. Then he does something no other guy ever does for me, except for Denver; he cuddles with me afterwards. Since we've taken things to a sexual level, it's been a learning curve for me. I'm so used to hard, fast, 'pump and go' sex, I have had to learn how to have more romantic sex. Malakai is a great teacher in that regard.

The next night, however, didn't really go as planned. My day started off normal: get up, have breakfast, go to work, same as any other weekday. Eight hours and a ton of stupid drama later, I got out of work and I ran in to Denver. We got talking and he invited me to dinner at his place. Now had I not been so forgetful I would have remembered that Malakai wanted to go to the movies tonight, but whether it was work stress or just absent-mindedness I forgot about my plans with my brother and went to Denver's place. We had some pizza and beer and watched some comedy program on TV and then he decided to blow me. He and I have known each other for a long time and surprise blowjobs was something that we were okay with doing to each other. I returned the favor of course. He decided to cum on my chest, which I freaking loved when he did that.

After the afterglow of my orgasm faded I looked down at my watch and saw it was 8 PM. At that moment I remembered my plans with Malakai. We were supposed to meet at the house by 6 and go to a 7 PM movie. I realized I fucked up, so I quickly said good-bye to Denver and got dressed and ran out of his house. When I got back to my house and opened the door, I could see Malakai sitting on a chair in the dining room, no candles this time though. Just a clear table and a disappointed look on his face.

"Sorry", I said, trying to catch my breath.

He walked up to me and looked me and said, "Where were..." he interrupted himself and I could see his nostrils flare. "Never mind I think I have my answer."

"I was hanging out with Denver and I lost track of time", I said.

Malakai didn't say a word. He shot me a disapproving glare and retreated to the basement. I tried to follow, but he said to me, "we'll talk in the morning."

I knew it was best to just go along with that. I wish I could say this was our first fight, but it wasn't.

Guess that's one thing we have in common with other couples. I retreated to my own room and just lay there on the bed feeling guilty.

We did talk the next morning at the table. It wasn't exactly a fun conversation.

"What the hell Rodya, how could you forget our date like that?" Malakai said.

"Date?" I said.

Malakai sighed and said, "I know we can never be a legal couple, but I still want to do romantic things with you."

"I know, I just forgot last night. I'm sorry," I said.

"Guess Denver is more fun than me," Malakai said.

"That's not true", I said.

"Look Rodya, I can put up with you having sex with other guys, but to not show up to do something that we planned to do together, just the two of us? That's what irritates me! You clearly preferred to be covered in his cum than hanging out with me last night!" Malakai said.

"I lost track of time after I got out of work. It was a really stressful day for me, I wasn't thinking clearly" I said.

"Was this before or after the beer?" Malakai said.

"It was before. I'm sorry," I said.

"I'll forgive you, just don't expect to be getting any action from me for awhile" Malakai said.

I nodded my head in acknowledgment and we left for work. I felt like shit the whole time I was at work.