FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

. . . Peace and quiet. Jeeve and Clover lay in bed, sleeping contently through the storm that was brewing outside. It was the first time since his parent's death that he had actually slept well, though unbeknownst to him, his well earned rest would not last long. Jeeve grumbled in his sleep, tossing and turning trying to get comfortable. Thunder boomed and lightning flashed, causing Clover to yip and leap on Jeeve in fright. She began pawing his chest and whimpering but Jeeve couldn't hear her for he himself was frightened.

"STAY BACK!" Jeeve warned as he clutched onto Ethos with dear life. He had running through this dense jungle for hours, trying not to be caught. He had stumbled into a pit and was now at the mercy of his captor. "Hello Jeeve." Jeeve tried to climb out the pit, but cried out in pain as he slid back down to bottom. "Don't come any closer Kira!"

"My my. Feisty just like your rabbit friend. A pity she had to meet such a grisly death." Jeeve growled angrily screaming "I'LL KILL YOU! YOU BETTER NOT HAVE LAID A CLAW ON HER!"

"Yes . . . That's it! Get angry with me! Unleash your rage upon me! Show me your true emotions!" Tears streamed down his face as he lunged for Kira. She sidestepped with ease and laughed as he fell face first in the dirt. Kira rolled him onto his back saying "Tell me where you are and I may let you live." Jeeve mumbled as he tried to sit up, but Kira kicked him in his face, foiling his attempt. "If you won't willingly reveal your location, then I will make you." Kira took her weapon Jericho and plunged her into Jeeve's side.

"AAAHHHH!"

"Yes keep screaming I've almost . . . Hmm The seas of Tigerius? An interesting hiding place." Kira pulled her spear from Jeeve and smiled as his blood sprayed everywhere. Reaching out with her paw, she caught some of the blood and tasted it. "MMM! You taste divine! I can't wait to sink my actual teeth into your flesh."

"AAAHHH!! STAY BACK!" Jeeve lunged from his bed, tripping and falling on the floor. "Ow!? Wait I'm alive?" To test his theory he rockily stood up and sat on the bed. "Well kind of . . ." Jeeve looked over at Clover and noticed her hiding under the sheets. "Oh I'm sorry girl. Did I scare you? Come here." Clover poked her head out from under the sheets, and scampered over to Jeeve. He picked her up and set her down gently in his lap. "Did you have a bad dream too?" Clover shook her head, then yipped as the lightning flashed across the window. "Oh it was the storm outside. You don't have to fear the storm, it doesn't last forever!" Clover whimpered then weaseled out of Jeeve's grasp. "Where you going?" Clover said nothing as she jumped off the bed and grabbed something from under it. Jeeve picked her up from the floor and placed her back in his lap. "What's this Clover? Wait? Is this my book?"

Jeeve tried to grab the book from her, but she jerked her head away before he could grab it. Clover then dropped it in front of her and the book opened up to a certain page. "What's this? Jeeve picked up the book and began skimming through the pages. He couldn't find anything of importance here, just talk of trade routes, political figures, and a giant worm? 'This book is strange. Wait?! If Grandpa had this, that means he must be here right?" Jeeve closed the book and with newfound resolve, dashed for the bridge. "SHIRLENE! I HAVE QUESTIONS!!! Shir- Wait where is she?" Clover began sniffing around and barked at Jeeve "What you find girl?" Jeeve bent down and picked up a note from Shirlene. "Hey kid if you need me I'm down in the motor pool. P.S. You should make breakfast. I'm not telling you to, but . . . . YOU SHOULD DO IT!" Taking the hint, Jeeve dashed off to the kitchen, to prepare breakfast again.

"When he was done he said "Come on Clover. We're gonna get some answers!" When the two got to the motor pool, they found Shirlene under a vehicle, covered in grease. Once she noticed them, she smiled and slid from under the vehicle "Hey looky there! You got my suggestion." Jeeve rolled his eyes as he handed the greasy rabbit her plate.

"Shirlene I got a question for you."

"Can it wait til' after I've stuffed my face?"

"No it can't! This is real important!" Shirlene sighed, setting the plate down and replied "Oh alright! What's so important that a rabbit can't eat?"

"Are you absolutely positive! That there are no other humans here!"

"If by hue-man you're referring to yourself then I can absolutely say yes!"

"Then how do you explain this?!" Jeeve threw the book to her and she began casually skimming through it. After about a minute or two she said "Well it's like an old history book. Like ancient old! We don't even use this kind of paper anymore!"

"I found that in my grandfather's attic in my world! How do you explain that?!" Shirlene seemed lost in thought before she sighed saying "Look I don't know where or how this got in your world but, I may know a nutjob who can help you."

"Really?!"

"Yea I conned him awhile ago, but who knows? Maybe he's forgiven me after all this time."

"When can we see him?!"

"Well I mean we're free tod-"

"CAPTAIN! INCOMING TRANSMISSION! PRIORITY ONE!"

"Hold that thought kid. Momma's gotta take care of business. Patch the loser through computer. . . Oh Shit! Eh kid make yourself scarce! Can't have animals out there knowing I'm harboring an alien." Jeeve nodded then quickly left the room as the call came through. On screen appeared a smartly dressed panther. He had on a pristine white suit with a black tie to match. He scanned over Shirlene through his thick rimmed glasses and said "Hmm. So you're the one who escaped Kiren. I never would have thought." Shirlene smiled saying "Prem Kumar! My old friend! How's life up there with the big shots?"

"It's acceptable. How's life as a fugitive?"

"Oh it's great you know! I get to sleep in! Eat cereal whenever I want, I can fly without registration, you know! The whole works!"

"Yes sounds . . . delightful." Shirlene rocked on the balls of her paws awkwardly. Here was one of her old high profile employers just calling to . . . catch up on all times?

"So Mr. Kumar. What brings you calling on my private channel?" Prem Kumar just stared at her with a look of pain mixed with desperation.

"How did you do it?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"DAMMIT SHIRLENE! I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR GAMES!!" The rabbit pilot jumped back from the yelling. She watched with intrigue as Mr. Kumar sighed and brought his paws up to his face.

"I apologize for my outburst Ms. Yara. I just . . . How did you it!? How did you bypass the ARKTower?!" Shirlene cringed at the sound of her real last name but quickly recovered replying

"Ah sorry Mr. Kumar. A good girl never reveals her secrets."

" . . . Can you do it again?!"

"I mean I could, but why?" Mr Kumar sighed saying "They have them . . ."

"Have who Mr. Kumar?"

" . . . My family; Scarlet and Stella." Shirlene shook her head while walking over to a cabinet. She pulled out a bottle of wine and began chugging straight from the bottle.

"So let me get this straight. Your family has been kidnapped and you want me? A criminal to Alteria to retrieve them? I'm sorry but why can't you go to someone who's not . . . well me?"

"I've went to everybody! Everbody I tell you! Every damn council and police force in Alteria!! Everyone tells me the exact same thing!! Just fill out a report and we'll have someone on the case in 6 to 8 business days. I don't have that kind of time!"

"Well okay but why me?! I mean our last transaction is what landed me on that miserable rock in the first place!"

"Look I'm real sorry about trading you over to the Kiren authorities! I thought everything was secure! I couldn't risk being caught I-I . . ."

"Alright look. Just . . . Tell me the truth. What would I be up against?" Prem adjusted his tie and glasses and pressed a few button on his console. Just then, a holographic image of a kingdom appeared on screen. "The thugs are located in the Lauri Deserts. I know they haven't left yet because of the ARKTowers over there. My wife's distress beacon went off over here." Shirlene studied the information and sighed "So you mean to tell me she's in the Red Tail territory?"

Prem nervously wrung his paws together and said "Yes . . . I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, but I'm desperate! Once I told the authorities they laughed in my face! My FACE!? Without my tax contributions there wouldn't even be a ARKTower!"

"Okay pal don't blow a gasket. Your beacon location is pretty accurate so I'll see what I can do. I think I can handle this, wouldn't be the first time I had to dance with delinquents."

"Oh yes! Thank you so much Ms. Yara! How could I ever repay you?!"

"Well one; I think a million credits is a fair price for such an impossible feat."

"Fine consider it done! And number two?"

"The last name's Spitfire. Don't go throwing my government name around like a ball. Gotta keep up appearances. Oh and before I go. I don't know If I can do this successfully or not, but I'll do my best alright?"

"I know this is a lot to ask of you especially considering your own history with the Lauren Kingdom, but I believe in you Ms. Y- I mean Spitfire. Please bring them home." Mr. Kumar pressed another button on his console and ended the transmission. Shirlene sighed and sat down "Alright you scoundrels, you can come back in now." Jeeve and Clover poked their heads from around the corner, then walked in. "Say Shirlene who was that?"

"That my alien friend was an old . . . employer of sorts. I used to smuggle things in and out of kingdoms for him."

"Well what did he want with you?"

"Well I guess the cat's gotten into hot water, so he needs someone to go retrieve his family from behind enemy lines."

"I'm guessing that's what we're gonna go do now?"

"You guessed compadre! So go get suited and booted, because we'll be there in 30 minutes."

"Alright we're off to save the day! Now that's a noble cause!" Jeeve turned to leave then stopped as he got a better look at Shirlene's machine.

"Say Shirlene's what's this thingy here do? Looks like a fancy four wheeler . . . With a turret?"

"Oh this old thing? It was pet project of mine awhile ago, but When shit hit the fan, I had to abandon it here. I'm actually surprised it works. When you're done getting dressed, you and your little pup better meet me on the bridge."

"You can count on us!"

20 MINUTES LATER

Jeeve and clover reported back to Shirlene ready for action. Shirlene pressed a few buttons on her console and brought up a picture of several wolves and what seemingly was a castle. "Alright listen up pups! We're going to the Lauren Kingdom to a little place called The Red sands of Sauri. Now we've been tasked with a little search and rescue mission, pretty easy stuff. All we have to do is sneak into the Red Tail's clan and rescue two panthers."

"Wait a minute! None of that sounds easy!"

"It is trust me. . . Oh and I forgot tell you! There's an ARKTower protecting The Lauren Kingdom too sooooo . . . . You know what to do!"

"Wait another one of those terrible towers?"

"Yea and here's the kicker . . . It's on the other side of the kingdom so you'll have to just know when the beam is coming."

"How?! How am I supposed to know when the beam's coming?"

"Well I don't know commune with the buffalo? Figure it out kid, you're the sword wielding alien." Jeeve sighed and closed his eyes, Shirlene had a knack for pushing her luck. "Alright kid we're right above Lauren and . . . We've got company!"

"What do you mean by company?"

"What'd you think!? I invited the Lauren Air Guard to tea? They're here to tear us a new asshole! So get out there and start deflecting bullets!" Jeeve nodded quickly and scurried to the service hatch. He slowly poked his head out of the hatch and ducked as a stray laser beam flew by. "This rabbit will be the death of me!" Jeeve thought as he climbed out onto the roof.

Right behind the C Wing were two black interceptors. They seemed to be firing warning shots, but Jeeve wasn't taking any chances. The ship on the left fired two shots at him, both of which were deflected back to it. The ship seemed to rock a bit, but then re-stabilized and continued firing back. Jeeve began sweating bullets as both ships tried to score a hit on the C Wing. Shirlene brought the ship into a steep nose dive yelling "HOLD ON KID!! I'M GONNA LOSE THEM IN THE DUNES!" Jeeve clutched onto the railing as the C Wing spiraled towards the sandy dunes causing Jeeve to suffer from temporary vertigo. "HERE WE GO KID!" Shirlene yelled as she pulled up on the ship's control stick.

The C Wing roared and leveled out, barely scraping the sand as Shirlene fought to raise the altitude. The two interceptors didn't fair as well. Both ships couldn't pull up in time and crashed in the sand. Shirlene leveled out the ship, while Jeeve readied for the ARK beam. He could see it creeping over the horizon and braced for impact. The beam's trajectory arced a little lower than the last one, so he had to run to the front on the ship to block it. The beam surged through Ethos, but eventually died out as Jeeve held on. "Alright Shirlene, I've blocked the beam. You're clear for landing."

"Nice going kid! Our target is only a few Klicks north, so here's the plan. I going to give them a chance to bring the hostages out before I blow the place to kingdom come!"

"Won't you hurt the hostages?"

"Well it honestly doesn't matter. I'm still getting paid either way so, let's hope our wolvern friends decide to play nice." Shirlene brought the ship down in front of The Red Tail Castle and called for Jeeve. After a short climb down Jeeve asked "I thought we were going in using stealth?"

"Oh no! You misheard me then! I honestly thought the Red Tail Clan would have better defenses! All it takes is a M.L.R.S attack and this place is demolished!"

"You seem a little trigger happy today. Everything alright?"

"Look kid . . . I haven't gotten to use the artillery on my ship in ages. I'm dying to blow something up. So we'll give them one chance and if they refuse . . . BLAM! We send them to meet their maker!" Jeeve shook his head in disapproval, but followed Shirlene out of the ship anyway. The two walked calmly across the sandy terrain, but were stopped as two guards began yelling at them. "EH! NOT ANOTHER STEP!" Shirlene nudged Jeeve's rib whispering "Don't worry! I'll handle these goons!"

"Hello my wolvern friends! I am Captain Shirlene of C Wing!"

The leader of the guards called back "And why should we care?"

"Well we have a message for your leader."

"Anything you need to say to him goes through us." The wolves raised their blasters and aimed for the duo. Shirlene rolled her eyes and said "Why so distrusting? Fine . . . If it has to be that way please forward this message to him." The wolves lowered their weapons as Shirlene reached inside her flight jacket's pocket. She quickly drew her guns and killed both wolves before they could even react. "Tell him I came to fuck shit up."

"Whoa . . . Uh don't you think that was a little much?!"

"What?! They were gonna shoot! It was us or them!"

"I guess, but really with the cheesy line?"

"I didn't think it was cheesy. I thought it was pretty cool!" The duo continued on toward the castle, only to walk another ten steps before being stopped again. More wolves had shown up and this time, they asked no questions. They quickly formed a circle around the duo and threw a large net over them. Once the net was secured, the group hoisted them up and began carrying them to the castle. Jeeve looked over to Shirlene and noticed how . . . sad she was. It was an emotion the young hero hadn't seen on his friend since his arrival here. He nervously glanced around the group, making sure he wasn't being watched. "Psst! Hey Shirlene! This net is pretty weak. I can slice through it with no trouble!"

"Don't do it kid. Save it for the throne room."

"Say Shirlene. Are you okay? You look upset and I know it's not the fact that we were captured." Shirlene sighed and whispered "I used to live here . . . With my family on Lauri."

"Really? How were things? What did you guys do?"

"We did what all prey animals did. . . Farmed water. Farmers on Lauren are just glorified slaves. They worked us to the bone for rations of food and water. . . It was a miserable existence."

"So I'm guessing you left then?"

Smart kid. Yea I wanted off this miserable sand pile, so one night I told my family goodbye. I stashed away on an outgoing shipment ship and never looked back."

"Wow that's real deep . . . So who imprisoned you?"

"Queen Takota. She made all prey animals slaves . . . Look kid I don't even know why I'm telling you this, but I just want you to know who we're up against. These guys work for her, if you see them don't hesitate to kill. If the king of these fools doesn't want to play nice, then slash him where he stands alright?" Jeeve gave a solemn nod. He wasn't real excited about the prospect of having to kill someone, but if he needed to keep his new family safe, then he would make an exception.

The wolves got tired of carrying the duo, then resorted to dragging them across the floor. Once inside the castle Jeeve and Shirlene were taken to the throne room where the net was lifted, but in it's place high tech handcuffs were instated. Jeeve watched as Ethos was carried away and out of the room, he began to feel sorry for whomever would be holding Ethos when he called for him. On the throne sat a royally adorned, tan wolf. The wolf on the throne looked at Shirlene uncaringly then turned his attention to Jeeve and asked "What on Alteria is this creature? It's the strangest thing I've ever laid eyes on!" One of the guards in the back yelled "We don't know your highness! We found him and the rabbit walking toward the castle earlier. They killed two other guards on their way here!"

The royal wolf looked very intrigued and asked "Tell me . . . Rabbit! Tell me why have you slain two of my sons?" Shirlene looked at her restraints, then up at the wolf and said "Well all we wanted to do was deliver a message to you . . . Your Highness."

"Oh a message? For moi?"

"Yes it comes from Mr. Prem Kumar. There seems to be some kind of misunderstanding here. You see, you've accidentally kidnapped his wife and daughter and if you could just kindly return them . . . We'll be on our way."

"Oh that is Rich! Prem Kumar sent you two To retrieve his family! That Kumar! Always making poor choices."

"Your humbleness. If you do not return his family I painfully inform you, that there will be dire consequences." The royal wolf raised one eyebrow,then smiled as he said "Two of you go retrieve Ms. Scarlet. I want these two to see failure in the fur." The two guards nodded and quickly ran off to retrieve Mr. Kumar's wife. When they returned, Jeeve couldn't help but feel sorry for the poor cat. She was dressed in ratty, torn, and coarse slave garments, and she was exceptionally thin. The bags under her eyes were definitively from a lack of sleep. She also had several bruises and cuts, clearly on display for the duo to marvel at. "Take a good look Mrs. Kumar. This is the rescue party your loving husband sent. A rabbit and a . . . Well I don't know what that one is, but the point remains. Mrs. Kumar sent a hopeful gaze towards Shirlene and Jeeve, she had not yet given up hope and Jeeve could see it.

Shirlene sighed and replied "Where's the daughter?"

"I'm done talking to you rabbit. Your time has come."

"Last Chance Ton'Ja! Release her and tell me where the daughter is or I'll set this place ablaze!" Ton'Ja laughed at Shirlene's threat and said "Oooh! You are a fiesty one! Go ahead, light this place ablaze!! I do not fear you rabbit, I am TON"JA LEADER OF THE RED TAIL CLAN!"

"Okay just don't say I didn't warn you . . . Jeeve."

"Wha? Uh . . Yes!?"

"Call for your little friend." Jeeve scrunched his face in confusion, before smiling and yelling "ETHOS!" The weapon's name reverberated off the large ornate walls, causing everyone to look around in anticipation. Everything became quiet, until a large crashing noise startled the guards. Ton'Ja nervously fiddled with his robe before yelling "Someone go stop that incessant racket!" Several guards filed out the room with weapons drawn, ready to attack the intruder. Screaming and yelling could be heard right outside the door, causing Shirlene and Jeeve to smile. Just then the weapon burst through the door, hurtling towards its master. Jeeve smiled and leapt into the air. With a midair tilt, the weapon flew towards him, slicing his restraints in the process. Jeeve caught the weapon and brought him down on Shirlene's restraints. Once free Shirlene charged for a guard who was watching Jeeve and jump kicked him in the chest. The wolf fell down, dropping his weapon in surprise. Grabbing the weapon, Shirlene quickly fired upon the downed guard and returned back toward Jeeve.

"Alright Ton'Ja. This is your absolute last chance. Don't make me kill you." Ton'Ja quickly shot up from his throne and began running for the exit. "Guards! Kill them! Let none live!" Just as he left, several more guards poured in, all armed with heavy weaponry. Shirlene looked at her wrist com and yelled into it saying "Computer! You there!?"

"YES CAPTAIN?"

"Launch the Fur Fucker. We need a good set of wheels right now."

"RUNNING DEPLOYMENT PROCESS . . . LAUNCHING '** FUR FUCKER' *_ _* "**

"What's the Fur Fucker?"

"Oh just bad-ass, four wheeled vehicle of death and destruction." The duo refocused their attention to the ring of wolves, ready to kill. Jeeve readied Ethos and quickly charged for the ring. He moved much faster than any normal animal, that the wolves didn't even realize he had moved. Jeeve ran round and round, slashing and cutting anything foolish enough to stand still. Once the wolves realized they were being killed, they quickly began firing in all directions, trying to hit the invisible threat. Shirlene quickly slipped away toward Scarlet and said "Hey are you alright?" The scared panther only whimpered in response, leaving Shirlene to sigh. "Your husband sent me to get you outta here, but I need you to remember . . . Where is your daughter."

"I-I . . . S-S-She . . . I DON'T KNOW! We were separated when we were first kidnapped. Please you have to help her!"

"Don't worry ma'am." Shirlene quickly glanced to her watch and saw that the Fur Fucker was already here. "Help has arrived." Just then the sounds of screeching tires could be heard out in the hall. A couple guards stopped fighting to go check on the noise, only to get ran over by the Fur Fucker. The vehicle barreled into the throne room, knocking into several guards. The vehicle began doing donuts around Shirlene, causing a thick smoke cloud to shield her. Once it stopped and the smoke cleared, the heroes stopped to assess the damage.

Shirlene stepped over a few bleeding bodies and knelt down to one of a wolf sliced cleanly in half. "Wow kid I'm impressed. This one's chopped right in half! And you said your little sword couldn't do that."

"Yea I guess I got a little carried away there . . . But what are we gonna do about Stella? We don't know where she is!"

"Don't worry kid. I'll chase after Ton'Ja in the Fur Fucker, and you get Mrs. Kumar back to the C Wing." Jeeve nodded while slinging the panther over his shoulder. "Alright Ms. K, tell me if I'm going to fast." The panther nodded meekly, then dug her claws as Jeeve took off with unparalleled speed. Once they were gone, Shirlene got in the F.F. and began pressing a few buttons on her on board computer. "Alright computer, where's this little weasel heading?"

"THERE ARE THREE VEHICLES HEADING WEST CAPTAIN."

"Ah so this asshole's gonna go run to town. Gotcha! Computer keep a lock on the convoy and start the M.L.R.S protocol."

"YES CAPTAIN. RUNNING THE MULTIPLE LAUNCH ROCKET SYSTEM** _ _ ***PROTOCAL NOW."*

"Excellent. Run while you can Ton'Ja, because when I find you . . . It's over." Shirlene revved up the four wheeler's engines and drove out the throne room. According to her computer, Ton'Ja and his convoy hadn't even made it off castle grounds yet. She rolled through the hallway and ducked as several laser beams flew past her. Turning around, she could see five wolves all in their own hover tanks. "Nice. And here I thought they'd be no challenge. Computer. Get the Fur Fucker's guns online."

"YES CAPTAIN. RUNNING '** FUR FUCKER ***'S' COUNTER BALLISTIC PROTOCOL NOW."*

Shirlene watched excitedly as the F.F's turret came to life, immediately aiming for the wolves behind her. "Take the wheel computer, I'm gonna fuck these wolves up." Shirlene brought the scope down over her eyes and took aim. The hover tanks may have had better maneuverability than the F.F, but they weren't faster. Shirlene aimed for the one in the middle and took fire. The laser beams shot out of the turret like those of a machine gun, spraying every which way. Several beams hit the wolf in the middle instantly killing him, causing his tank to veer off into the one on his left. Both tanks began pushing against one another, before they lost control and crashed. The other tanks continued firing at her, causing her yell at the computer.

"DAMN COMPUTER! How long does it take to launch a fucking rocket! I can literally see them getting away!"

"CHECK YOU SIX CAPTAIN."

Shirlene turned around and indeed saw a rocket hurtling for its target. Ton'Ja and his convoy looked up and began scrambling to get out of the rocket's way. The rocket touched down between the three vehicles and completely blew them away. Shirlene smiled and laughed at the huge dust cloud her rocket created. She turned around and saw another rocket hurtling for the tanks behind her. The projectile slammed into a tank, instantly engulfing it and the other tanks in flames. Shirlene drove on to Ton'Ja's wreckage, looking for the wolf herself.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" On the ground, crawling from under his overturned vehicle was Ton'Ja. He looked at Shirlene and whimpered in fright as she came closer. Shirlene pulled out her gun and began playing with it

"Say T Dog. Do you remember me? I'm guessing by your blank expression that you don't so I'll fill you in real quick. I used to be a slave here on Lauren, property of the Queen. I remember you very vividly . . . You were especially nasty to my family. You made our lives miserable, so miserable in fact that I had to leave." Shirlene bent down toward the scared wolf and said "As you can see by my heartfelt revelation . . . I hate slavery. So before I kill you, I'll give you this final chance to tell me where Kumar's daughter is."

Ton'Ja nodded his head quickly and said "I sold her okay! The queen wanted new servants, and she offered me something I couldn't refuse . . . Credits!"

"You miserable piece of shit! Now I have to go kill the queen too?!"

"Please mercenary! Have mercy on me! I-I W-Will Change! I'll let the others go, I'll relinquish my land, disband the Red Tails, just don't take my life!" Shirlene sighed and said "Oh what is a rabbit to do? Do I take the miserable wretch's life? Or do I show compassion and mercy?" Shirlene turned around to face the pleading wolf and smiled. "Everyone deserves a second chance . . . And if you're really willing to change, then I'll give it to you." Ton'Ja nodded his head with vigor and said "Yes oh Yes! Thank you kind warrior! For I wi-" Ton'Ja's words were cut short as Shirlene fired a bullet right between his eyes. The wolf uttered no more and fell to the floor like a sack of potatoes. "Well almost everyone deserves a second chance . . ." Shirlene made her way over to him and began dragging his body from under the rubble. She smirked as she saw his concealed weapon under his stomach. "Once a bastard always a bastard."

Shirlene walked over to the Fur Fucker and said "Computer please call the C Wing. I need to see how the kid's holdin' up."

"CALLING 'C WING' CAPTAIN."

Shirlene waited patiently as the connection tried to patch through, though once it did she was greeted with a pretty amusing sight. Jeeve was trying his damnest to pry Mrs. Kumar from his person. "Oh hey Shirlene! How'd the chase go?"

"Pretty good kid. Got the information I needed and tied a few loose ends as well."

"That's great! So where's Stella?"

"She's a slave for the queen now . . . I'm sorry Mrs. Kumar." The panther's grip slackened on Jeeve as she slid to the floor crying. Jeeve instantly picked her up and began cradling her small form. "Well what now Shirlene?"

"Well what do you think?! We're gonna go to the queen and demand she give us Stella back and if she doesn't I'll kill her too."

"Wait you killed the wolf guy?"

"Well if was either him or me so . . . Yea I killed him."

" . . ."

"Don't look so shocked! You sliced like 20 wolves in half so if anyone's a cold blooded killer it's you."

"Don't make me feel bad about it!"

"Anyway We need to go pay the queen a visit. I'm gonna launch a flare to my location, I want you to run to it and join me in the Fur Fucker."

"Alright sounds like a plan! I'm gonna go put Mrs. Kumar to sleep and I'll dash on over to you."

"Don't keep me waiting kid."

A few minutes passed and on the horizon was a speedy Jeeve, tearing up sand as he dashed towards Shirlene. "Took you long enough kid!"

"Sorry! You try prying a frightened panther off you."

"Hop in! We're going straight for the Castle's gates."

"This plan is filled with holes. Are you sure we can just ram the castle like this? It doesn't seem wise. Maybe we can reason with her!"

"Jeeve listen to yourself! She's a fucking slave owner! Besides predators only respond to shows of force. Once I bust her castle gates down, she'll be bowing at my feet." Jeeve shook his head and sighed "Well if you say so." Shirlene smiled at his submissive nature and revved the engine. The Fur Fucker began spitting up sand as it stalled in place, before Shirlene threw it in gear and sent the four wheeler racing towards the castle.

The duo raced through the city, dashing ever closer to the castle.Once the castle was in range, Shirlene pressed a few buttons on the F.F.'s computer causing the vehicle to jerk and tilt.

"Hey Shirlene! What was that?!"

"Just readied this baby to launch a missile towards the castle's entrance."

Jeeve opened his mouth to protest, but again was silenced by a medium sized projectile hurtling from the vehicle's undercarriage. Shirlene chased after the missile, and rejoiced as it plowed through the castle's doors. Shirlene smiled and rammed through the entrance, causing several guards and officials to scramble to get out of her way. She made a sharp turn and sent the F.F bursting through the throne room. Once inside, the vehicle began doing donuts around the room. Shirlene killed the engines and leapt with Jeeve from the spinning vehicle right in front of the queen.

"Hey Queen Tokota! Long time no see! It's me Shirlene Yara! You probably don't remember me, but I was farmer 5542!" Queen Takota was a stern looking fox. She was robed in a purple dashiki, and was wearing a large decorative crown made from wood, grass, and straw. She took in the destruction of her throne room and replied nonchalantly "That serial number sounds familiar . . . Though what has brought you barreling through my throne room?"

"You have something or rather someone who does not belong to you. Ton'Ja sold you a Stella Kumar even though she was no slave. I'm here to let you know that Mr. Kumar wants his daughter back."

"All sales are final by Alterian law. I do not have to return anyone. In fact after we're done here, I'm going to make you both slaves to the crown." Shirlene's calm demeanor was replaced with one of rage leaving her to reply "Look here you stupid bitch! I've had it up to here with this ass backward kingdom, now you're gonna let that girl go or I swear to all that is holy, that I'll blow this castle sky high."

"My aren't you a suicidal rabbit . . . Wait a minute! You must be the pilot that escaped the ARK Tower's gaze! What manner of magic has protected you thus far?"

"Not magic! I'm just a certified badass, and please don't think I won't fire upon royal grounds. Me and my pal here have already wiped out the Red Tail clan. You know I was actually surprised, they were really scary when I was a kid, but all it took was two missiles and an alien from another world to wipe em' out."

"You . . . Destroyed the entire Red Tail Clan?!"

"Well there's probably a few stragglers that are gonna come back from patrol to an empty castle and dead ruler, but other than that I pretty much trashed them." Queen Takota stopped talking and instead took to thinking about her current situation. Once she came to a conclusion she said "You there. Young alien! I notice you possess a weapon of the patriarchs. Are you in fact a patriarch?" Jeeve looked to Shirlene for an explanation, but she just shrugged her shoulders instead.

"Well I don't know if I'm a patriarch, but I do know that I here to do the right thing!"

"Spoken like a true patriarch, I tell you what. If you do something for me, then I will release the panther you seek."

"Wow really!? You hear that Shirlene?! She'll let Stella go if we do something for her!"

"Yea I heard, but tell me Takota. What do you want us to do?"

The fox queen's countenace fell and was replaced with a sad, longing face. "I want you to bring back the water . . ." Jeeve scratched his head in confusion, while Shirlene said "Welp Jeeve we tried! Let's leave this place and tell Kumar that his daughter fell in a ditch or something."

"Wait why are we leaving? Allwe have to do is bring back the water right? Sounds easy enough!"

"Kid. This nutjob's talking about bringing back THE FUCKING OCEAN!"

" . . ."

"Yea. My thoughts exactly. Listen here Jeeve, the ocean's been gone since before I was born! No manner of missiles, rockets, or magical swords is gonna bring that back."

"Well can we at least try?! What do you have to lose by trying?"

"Well my dignity, my time, my self esteem . . . My lunch."

"Aww come on! Can we please try!"

"Oh I seriously cant say no to you can I? Fine kid, if you wanna experience the impossible firsthand, then we can do that!"

The vixen queen ran down from her throne and threw herself at Jeeve's feet crying "Thank you oh mysterious one! I pray for your success!" Shirlene made a gagging noise and said "Alright! Alright! Break it up! I'm not gonna subject my pure and innocent kid to such disgusting displays of affection. You can thank him, if he actually does it." Shirlene took his hand and drug him back to the Fur Fucker, grumbling and fuming all the way. Once inside the vehicle, she started it up and sent it rolling out the throne room.

Jeeve stared at Shirlene with a scrutinous gaze and said "Why do you think we can't bring the ocean back?"

"Kid answer this for me . . . Did you deal with the impossible back in your world?"

"Well no actually. I couldn't even jump two feet off the ground, let alone 20!"

"So why do you think we can do this?!"

"Well . . . I don't know! I guess I'm being a little cocky after wiping out an entire gang. Though I'm surprised you're not more confident about this."

"I can deal with a lot of things, including inter-dimensional, sword wielding aliens, but I can't deal with the impossible! She wants us to bring back 326 million cubic miles of H2O! That's just not possible!"

"Shirl."

"Shirl? What is that, some kind of nickname?"

"Well I-I though it was appropriate! Anyway you trust me to block the ARK Tower's beams right?"

"Hell yea I do!"

"Well trust in us to bring the water back." Shirlene smiled and said "I told you my body can't handle all this sappy, feely stuff!"

Jeeve just smiled back as she continued driving. The duo drove what looked like an abandoned beach. There was beach sand alright, but no water anywhere! Jeeve kept looking around as Shirlene drove on through the dried out ocean floor. Shirlene drove for another 20 minutes before stopping in front of a gigantic hole in the ground. She stepped out the Fur Fucker and calmly walked over to it saying "This is where it went."

"Where what went?"

"The water. Many years ago, it just disappeared. No one knows how or why, but all we do know is that it drained down that hole."

"Well okay then let's get the C Wing and fly down there or something!"

"Nope that ain't happening"

"Well do you got a cool hover car or something?"

"I'm not going with you pal."

"WHAT?! WHY NOT!?"

"Someone's gotta stay up top and keep the comms open. You'll be alone on this one pal."

"Why?!"

"You wanted to save the water, so now you gotta go save it!"

Jeeve looked at the hole and began shaking. He had a serious phobia of heights, even riding on the C Wing made him a little jittery and now he had to jump down into a hole probably thousands of feet deep.

"Oh and here kid." Shirlene threw him a wonky looking wrist communicator saying "I made this extra wrist comm from some of your weird alien tech.

"Wait!? You stole my phone?!"

"Was it a small rectangle made of glass?"

"YES!!"

"Then yes I took it."

"I can't believe you! Did you take my laptop too?!"

"Was that the larger rectangle that opened up like a clam?"

" . . . Yes."

"Then yes I took that too, though don't worry. You'll get it back!"

Jeeve sighed and turned back towards the gaping hole. "So what? Do I just . . . take a leap of faith?" Shirlene walked up while snickering at his joke replying "Yea kid, make sure you have a nice fall!" With her joke told, she pushed the hero over the edge and sent him plummeting down the hole. Shirlene looked back at the Fur Fucker and ducked as Ethos flew from the vehicle and went flying down the hole.

"Well I'll be!"