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Furry search engine

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"Okay. You're a scientist, right?" Slutcat said to Sworddog, sitting beside one of the formerly animated dead corpses.

"Well, I used to be anyway. Yes."

"Right. Well, please can you explain to me how a desiccated corpse like this can possibly move?"

"Um... magic?"

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"Well yeah, certainly magic. I didn't miss the glowing blue eyes. But really, feel this thing! It's like beef jerky. Can you reanimate beef jerky?"

"Well, not me, no... but Slutcat, this is a world where you can hurl lightning like it's natural. Allowances must be made."

"Fucking beef jerky people. This place is nuts. No wonder Ralof looked at me funny."

"There's probably going to be worse than this too you know."

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"Yeah but, if you're just going to say 'Magic' at everything, are there magic walking trees? Will the clouds come down and attack us? I mean, where's the limit? You're the scientist, tell me, exactly where is the limit?!?"

"Slutcat, I of all people understand your concern. But we can't live by our old rules. This place obviously has it's own set of rules and we're going to have to play by them."

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Slutcat sat and looked at the thing beside her.

"Yeah, I guess... Sworddog, if I die here, would you incinerate my body? I don't think I'd want to become one of these things."

"Ooo! Do you think there are zombie dogs too?"

"You're asking me?! I don't think there should be zombie anythings. But yeah, I guess so. Probably, right?"

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"Probably. And zombie squirrels."

"Zombie minnows."

"Zombie paramecium."

Slutcat laughed, the sound echoing off the empty chambers. "Zombie paramecium! What would they do?"

Sworddog laughed along with her. It was a good sound in the lonely Barrow. "Probably the same thing as regular paramecium. There comes a point that there's really not much difference."

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"Alright, alright," Slutcat said, standing back up. Let's get going and find this Arvel guy. He needs to assume room temperature. And watch out for dead parameciums."

"Paramecia. Plural latin conjugation."

"Oh, now you're going to get pedantic with me? Don't step on that obvious trap by the way. Good thing there's only one path here or we'd have to actually worry about which way he went!"

Sworddog stepped around the terribly obvious pressure plate and followed her friend.

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As they proceeded yet further into the Barrow, they ran across a few more of the Unlikely Dead. But now that they were watching for them, they were no more than a nuisance. But Sworddog was the first to pick up on an odd swooshing sound. Before long Slutcat heard it too. Then they turned a corner and saw a hallway in front of them. Three huge, deadly swinging blades were constantly in motion down the hallway and the body of Arvel the Swift lay in front of the first one.

"Not Swift enough it appears," Sworddog noted.

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"Dammit I wanted to kill him! Well, let's see what he's got on him," Slutcat complained, then began rummaging through the pockets of the dead Arvel.

"Whoa! What have we here?" Slutcat said, drawing a heavy metallic object from the dead man's pack. "I do believe this is the Golden Claw we've been looking for!"

"You found it? That's wonderful! Now we can get out of here," Sworddog barked.

"Hold on a second. There's some sort of journal here. Let me read it..."

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Slutcat sat and read the journal before looking up at Sworddog.

"It says this Claw is some sort of key to a door. Obviously Arvel thought it was quite a big deal. What do you think, do you want to continue on and see what it's all about? We've not really seen too much we can't handle down here, and he did mention treasure..."

But Sworddog wasn't paying much attention. She was watching the blades continue to swoop back and forth. "Slutcat... what do you know about Perpetual Motion machines?"

"What?" said the Khajiit, then she followed the dog's gaze. "All I know is that they are impossible."

"Apparently not here!"

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"Wait, this bothers you more than the Walking Beef Jerky?"

"Yes, Slutcat. Yes it does. I can see no lessening of the arc at all here. And other than the sound of the blades through the air, no evidence of any motivating energy either. Even if only slight, those blades should be slowing down. I would very much like to investigate this."

"Well alright then. Onward we go!" Slutcat declared.

"Great. So... how do you propose we get through those?"

"Well, there's more than enough room between each. If I time it right I can just step past each in order."

"Fine for you - but I've got a tail to think about! If you recall that sword incident, I've already got it bandaged. I'd prefer to keep it in one piece."

"Well, I'll get through and see if there's a way to stop it. Then you can come through. Sound good?"

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