Ander - Part 6: Subchapter 131

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131

"By the Cora, what -" The curmudgeon with the splinted leg's eyes had gone wide and he was pointing at the wall with a scabbed finger.

Layla twisted around, still holding Tio close just in case the crazies were throwing stuff again, but the things flying through the air weren't flaming stumps or broken barrels or heavy chunks of rock. It was the crazies themselves.

Beyond the wall of Wolven backs she saw a crazy leaping through the air, claws spread out, mouth wide open, fangs bared, saliva stretching out in the slipstream, but the next moment there came a sound like a book being slammed shut, and suddenly all his forward momentum disappeared. Layla didn't know what happened, but the crazy tipped over like a falling tree, a thin ribbon of blood trailing after the corner of his mouth in a crimson arc. Through many pairs of legs, she saw him slam into the ground in a puff of dust and snow, more blood welling from a rapidly swelling jaw.

"By the Cora, look!" one of the defenders shouted, elbowing his buddies in the ribs.

"Is that -"

"It is!"

More crazies were converging from every angle, like a ripple going in reverse. She could hear their wild snarls and growls.

"She's not gonna make it!"

More sounds like books being slammed shut -

Oh sure, Layla derided herself. If the pages were made of meat and the spines were actual spines, sure, that's exactly what it sounds like.

  • more vicious, animalistic grunts and yelps of pain. More dull thuds of bodies hitting the ground. Layla wanted to stand up to see what was going on so badly, but Tio was clinging to her dress as if he would drown without her.

"She's gonna make it!" That particular defender cupped his hands around his mouth and bellowed: "Come on! Over here! You can do it, come on! Over here, quickly!"

"Make room! Make room!"

The wall of defenders parted, and through the gap in their one and only line of defence, Layla got an actual look at what was really going on over there.

There were a lot more crazies than she had initially thought. Most of them were keeping their distance, flitting back and forth through the shadows and appearing only as black streaks whenever they passed in front of the camp fires. Others were bolder, and were actively trying to attack the defenders. Some were using heavy branches as clubs, but most had reverted to their primal instincts and were simply throwing themselves at the wall with no regard for their own safety, all gnashing jaws and swiping claws. All of that only grabbed her attention for a moment, however.

Nilia's charge was a far greater spectacle. Covered in blood and shadow, with strands of hair plastered to her face and a pair of glowing eyes blazing out from beneath a furious brow, she looked like some kind of demoness straight out of hell, charging straight through anyone and anything foolish enough to get in her way. And there were plenty.

A crazy tried to grab her, but his reaching claws closed over nothing but empty air. Another dove in low to the ground and tried to lock his jaws around her ankle, but only got a foot to the face for his troubles. She ducked and weaved and made hair-pin turns, an astounding display, especially considering the weight she must be carrying on her back. At first Layla thought it was some kind of lumpy bag, but as she got closer, she realised it was a full-grown Wolf.

Oh my gods, is he dead?

"Go, Nilia! Go!" a defender shouted. These were the same Wolves that had seen her as an enemy only hours before, but were now cheering her on and biting their nails in suspense. Many of them looked like they were on the verge of abandoning their posts and barging in there to help, but they couldn't do that without putting everyone else at risk.

A crazy grabbed her and Nilia clocked him right in the face, sending him reeling off into the shadows with a spurting nose. Another tried to block her path and she simply crashed right into him, knocking him aside with her shoulder. The breath plumed from her nostrils like steam.

Come on, Nilia! Come on!

A Wolf dashed in from out of nowhere and swiped his claws across her forearm, but despite the four red lines emblazoned in her flesh, dripping blood, she just kept going, not slowing down for anything.

Another leapt up and grabbed her passenger's leg, but instead of dropping him and going on alone, she just powered straight ahead, dragging the hapless Wolf along until he lost his grip and faceplanted in the dirt.

At least half a dozen crazies, more interested in the Foxes than Nilia, made straight for the gap in the living wall, screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Stop them!" someone shouted, and bare moments later there was an enormous crash of bodies slamming into each other. Twelve Wolves, locked together, growling like animals, snapping their jaws at each other's faces in a shower of spittle and blood.

Layla grabbed Tio's head and pressed him close to her chest so he wouldn't see. If there was one thing that could unravel the fragile bubble of peace she had so carefully woven for him, then a Wolf getting his throat ripped out was surely it.

"Push them back! Push them back!"

It was Wolf against Wolf, strength against strength, and neither side was willing to give an inch.

Until the Foxes came rushing in, that was.

They piled up behind the defenders, many of them standing barely shoulder-height to their more burly comrades, but that didn't stop them. They put their shoulders to the Wolves' backs and pushed with everything they had, digging furrows in the dirt with their feet, and the line began to move.

"Grarhh!" Blinded by their fury, the crazies actually tried to reach around the defenders to get at the Foxes. Their eyes flashed with a lunacy Layla couldn't even comprehend. It was - Wait...

Was that one crying?

Layla narrowed her eyes, but before she could be certain, the line surged together as one and forcefully shoved them back. One of the crazies fell flat on his tail, cursing and swearing in that strange language they sometimes spoke, but the others kept their feet and were already preparing to charge back in again.

Nilia came crashing through their line like an arrow bursting through a sheet of paper and the crazies went sprawling in all directions, slamming into the ground.

"Move!"

The defenders stood back and Nilia stormed into the safety of the ring, gradually slowing down, step by step, until she collapsed into a heaving, coughing pile, her passenger still slung over her shoulders.

"Nilia!"

Layla took Tio by the shoulders. "I'm sorry, cutie, but I'm going to have to leave you for a while."

He nodded and wiped a forearm across his snotty nose. "Okay."

"If you need me, just yell and I'll come running, okay?"

"Okay."

"And if anyone gives you any trouble for crying, you know what to tell 'em, right?"

Tio smiled. "I'll tell 'em to shove it right up their tail hole."

"That's exactly right." Layla ruffled his hair, but she didn't know how much longer she could keep smiling like this. "I'll be back the first chance I get."

"Goodbye, Fox-Kai."

Without looking back, Layla hurried over to where Nilia was down on all fours, panting and heaving. It was a bit of a trek, what with all the concerned Wolves and Foxes in the way, but when she finally made it through, she was met with a rather odd sight.

Nilia had laid her passenger down on the ground, his arms to his sides. He was in rough shape, with all manner of lacerations all over his body. His eyes were closed and he wasn't moving.

"Damn, Nilia, that was amazing!" a brawny Wolf said and gave her a gentle pat on the back. "I thought you were gonna fall for sure!"

Another crouched down and checked the scratch on her arm. "That looks nasty. Was it Kyn? I bet it was Kyn. That bastard never cleans out his claws."

A Fox, name of Ethan, dropped down to one knee and tentatively touched the unconscious Wolf's knee. "Is this guy okay? Who is he?"

Nilia stared around at them all, seemingly at a loss for words. She kept opening and closing her mouth, as if she wanted to say something, but couldn't find the right words. It was the Wolves in particular that seemed to confuse her the most.

"Nilia, are you all right?" one of them asked.

"Of course she's not all right, you idiot! Just look at her! She's bleeding everywhere!"

She did look rather bad. There were cuts and scrapes all over her arms and legs. Blood had soaked into her hair and it now lay plastered over her face in long, wavy tendrils.

"I... I'm fine..." she said, pausing to take a breath. "It's not mine... I think..."

"Here." Two Wolves came up to her, one to a side, and helped her back to her feet.

She looked at each of them as if she had never seen them before in her life, which was rather odd, since Layla could only assume all the Wolves more or less knew each other.

"Are you like them?" she asked, tilting her head back the way she came, at the shouts and howls still coming from the camp fires. "Are you the same?"

The first Wolf frowned a little, looked towards the wall, then back at Nilia. "Like them? No, we're different."

A huge surge of relief swept over Nilia's face, softening all of her features, and suddenly the demoness was gone. This was just Nilia, and she never looked more at peace. "Thank goodness..." All the strength ran out of her legs and her two helpers had to step in to keep her steady. "I didn't lie..." she breathed, looking around at all the Foxes and Wolves scratching their heads, trying to figure out what she was talking about, or if maybe she had gone loopy from blood loss. "I didn't lie... Thank goodness, I didn't lie..."

"Nilia?" Layla stepped forward tentatively. "Where is -"

"Don't worry about me," she said, slowly regaining her feet. "Please look at Dorin. He's the one who needs your help."

Layla didn't try to pursue the obvious questions any further than that.

Where is Ander and Sorrin and all the others? Why are you alone?

What happened with Banno? Is he dead?

She knelt by Dorin's side to inspect his wounds, almost grateful to have been cut off like that. If she had actually asked the question she most wanted to ask...

Did you see my sister out there?

No, best not to think about that. At least not now. Nilia probably didn't know anyway, and if she did... if she did...

Layla pushed that thought away and put on a big smile instead. It was better to smile. Everyone was looking at her. They were all worried. They were all hurt and cold and hungry and afraid. She had to show them that it was okay, that if she could smile in a situation like this, then surely it couldn't be all that bad.

Just keep smiling and everything will be fine.

Just. Keep. Smiling.

Layla took a deep breath and began to work.

Her hands were shaking.


Originally Nilia's arrival was stretched out over two subchapters of about thirty pages (ludicrous, I know). It started with Nilia doggedly making her way through the basecamp with Dorin leaning against her like a drunkard, bleeding all over the place, and debating philosophy.

Urgh! Damn you, Past Me! Damn you! >.<

Yeah. Most of the first deleted subchapter was Nilia walking around, lamenting, and I mean seriously lamenting. She was seeing all these Wolves going around, attacking each other, and lamenting that. She was seeing Wolves and Foxes hiding together in cramped little tents, and lamenting that. She was seeing pots of food overturned in the dirt, torn blankets, shredded bandages and lamenting that. Every paragraph had some kind of lamentation in it. And when she wasn't lamenting on something, she was arguing with Dorin, who was trying to convince her that there was still hope. It was basically just twenty pages of Nilia going "Everything is fucked and I'm sad now!"

I read through it later on and wondered when the hell had Nilia, arguably one of the toughest characters in this story, turned into such a whiny little baby?

The second subchapter I completely deleted was all about Nilia fighting her way through to the medical tent. There was a lot of punching and kicking and biting and clawing, all while trying to protect Dorin, and it just kept dragging on and on until she finally made it to the medical tent, where she was awestruck to see Wolves and Foxes working together to protect each other and her hope was restored and yadda-yadda-yadda. I hated almost all of it, but I didn't know how to fix it.

I sat down, reading through it all, trying to figure out what to do, when I realised something.

I could just delete all of it. The hoarder in me screamed out against this idea, but I shut him up right quick by pointing out that those two subchapters didn't actually influence the plot at all. I could delete thirty pages of my story and nobody would even notice (unless I pointed it out like I'm doing right now).

Let this be a lesson to any aspiring writers reading this right now. If you can delete thirty pages of your story without impacting the rest of it in any noticeable way, then odds are you REALLY don't need those thirty pages.

So I ended up simply having Nilia burst in without any warning at all. It was quick and (in my opinion) much more badass. I took two whole subchapters and condensed them down to a few paragraphs, cutting out all the annoying whining and pointless debating. The part where Nilia asks the Wolves if they were the same as those outside, and they replied that no, they're different, accomplished everything those clunky subchapters had set out to do in only a few sentences.

Once again, this was a classic case of GET ON WITH IT!!

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