Serenifi: Great Scott! Part I: Scene 2
(Cut to Tranquility Coyote-La-Fume racing out the door, frantically fitting her shoes on, with *insert 80s pop song here* playing in the background, on her skateboard, before grabbing onto the end of a truck, passing by a gym, waving at the males of variable species working out inside, before we cut to Acme Looniversity, where she comes across a grey-furred coyote with a purple cat tail.)
Tranquility: Hey, Agony!
Agony Coyote-Rush: Don't go that way, Mr. Bunny's looking for you. You get caught, it'll mean four tardies in a row, plus an expositional lecture.
(Cut to the inside of Acme Looniversity.)
Agony: OK. You're good.
Tranquility: You know, it wasn't my fault this time. Lexi said...
Mr. Bunny: Lexi? Don't tell me you were with that bimbo who's been claimed to be my descendant. You keep hanging with her, you'll end up a failure, and be forever listed on various top tens of worst cartoon remakes.
Tranquility: Yeah, OK.
Mr. Bunny: Don't give me the "yeah, OK" schtick again. You're a... Person who hangs out with controversial people... Like your mother! Why even bother with that cheerleading audition? You'll never amount to anything in the history of Acme Acres!
Tranquilty (The scene suddenly pauses, with the exception of our canine lead.): Our Acme Looniversity principal, everyone! When he's not giving "reason-you-suck" speeches, he's making fun of disabled students!
(The scene resumes, as we then cut outside to the football field.) Judge #1: Next!
(Cut to Tranquility in the center of the field in a cheerleader uniform.)
Tranquility: OK. Music, please? (Band behind her starts playing, before the coyote-skunk-fox hybrid begins dancing and jumping and the usual cheerleading junk.) "To those who think that they can better sing and dance and jump, just watch us and admire us, then you can kiss my rump!" (Bends over, mooning the judges.) Judge #2: OK, OK, turn off the music! (Band stops.) Sorry, I'm afraid you're too darn provocative!
(Cut to outside of the Acme Looniversity entrance, where Tranquility and Agony are sitting on a bench together.)
Tranquility: "Too provocative". I've seen sluttier performances from Perfecto. In fact, every cheerleading routine is provocative! I mean, you got the constant flashing, the tight uniforms, the sexy dances... Maybe I'm just not cut out for it.
Agony: But you're great at it! Just send your audition tape to a professional and see what happens.
Tranquility: But what if they say I'm no good? What if they say "Get outta here, kid! You got no future!" I don't think I can take that kind of rejection. Now I'm sounding like my folk.
Agony: Oh, Trank, she ain't that bad. Besides, her behavior is what made you exist. Besides, besides, Fifi's letting you borrow her car tomorrow night, right?
Tranquility: Yep.
Agony: Will she know what we're doing tomorrow night?
Tranquility: No, she thinks I'm going with the guys on a stereotypical shopping spree. If she knew I was going with you, she'd give me the usual lecture about how she never did that when she was a kid. I mean, she must've been born a Rueggerian. It's not like I'm gonna go back in time and discover that she was just as horny as Serenity.
Random Guy: Revive Blockbuster! Revive Blockbuster! 5 years ago, the very last of these stores was shut down in favor of those petty Internet services, which isn't exactly stocked with every single movie and tv show on the planet either. Mayor Void is sponsoring a campaign to show everyone that DVD and Blu-Ray are still just as useful as ever.
Tranquility: Take this. (Hands the person a $50 check.) I'm getting paid ten times as much as that for doing this film.
(Cut to Tranquility skateboarding to her house- A Cadillac in the middle of a junkyard, where she comes across a brunette coyote debating with a brunette human.)
Human: You didn't tell me your car had a skunk-scented air-freshener! I could've suffocated in there!
Coyote: Well, Montana, I didn't expect anyone to use it, since it's currently my house. I did NOT. Oh, hi Tranquility. Now can't you pay for the damage?
Montana: It's YOUR car, Serenity! You pay! Anyone home? Think Coyote... La-Fume, think! You wouldn't want me to get fired if the crew found out that I used someone else's car for seemingly no reason other than to establish my character, huh?
Serenity: No. I'll pay later.
Montana: Good. (To a redhead human female just outside yelling for him.) I'M COMING! (To Tranquility.) What're YOU lookin' at, narc? (Leaves.)
Serenity: (To Tranquility.) Don't give me that "What the hell, hero" look.
Tranquility: But the Cadillac! I was gonna use that tomorrow night! Don't you have any thoughts for your seventy-eighth offspring?
Serenity: Sorry, Montana's my boss, and that's apparently the most reasonable excuse a parent could give their child for situations like this in this world.
(Cut to Tranquility sitting at the table with Serenity, an assortment of coyote-skunk hybrids, an assortment of well-dressed fit males of various species, and a purple-and-white skunkette.)
Male Coyote-Skunk-Hybrid # Who-The-****-Cares: Hey, Tranquility, Agony called me this morning, going: "Where's Tranquility? She'll be late for class!"
Fifi: I don't like zat, how you say, "womanizer".
MCSH#WT*C: So, a guy who gives their beau life advice and spouts exposition translates to "womanizer"?
Fifi: Well, ze idea makes moi, how you say, "sick to my stomach". When I was your age, no boys ever chased any girls, let alone pranced after one, mistaking zem for a fellow member of zeir species... I met your... Female fazer when she was caught in zat brawl with a gang of Perfecto students. (Oui, zat rival school of yours existed back zen.) If zat never happened, we never would have met, or gone to zat prom, or gotten married, or met our servants here and helped to make you all exist.
To be continued...