5: Harsh Reality
#5 of All Nightmares Must End
(Sorry mates no yiff this time around, but still enjoyable and a vital part of the ongoing story)
The streets were harsh and cold that winter and Keysha found himself layering the clothes he had taken from Johnny's closet the only way he could stay warm. His footpaws and hands wrapped in old torn denim he found from a ratty old pair of pants in the trash. Sitting alone on a bench by the street the young leopard was freezing despite the multiple layers of clothes. His Violet eyes were heavy with fatigue and the days old empty feeling in his belly. The only thing keeping him awake was gusts of cold wind that sliced though fabric and flesh like a knife carrying drifts and gusts of snow with them.
The wheels of his mind were turning as he sat alone on the bench beside the desolate empty streets. Everything was crossing his mind running circles about his subconscious in a maddening fashion. Not even sure if he was thinking out loud or not he would repeat things in his mind as the thoughts hit him, too wrapped up in them to even notice they were reaching his lips or not.
"Im a freak."
"My life is nothing."
"I have nobody."
"Nobody wants a freak like me."
"Why don't these clothes feel right, why can't I adjust its been weeks, why can't I be normal?"
"Im a boy, not a girl."
"boys don't wear dresses."
"not a girl."
"not a girl."
"not a girl, wear dresses."
Those thoughts had been torturing him for hours now, only but a minor annoyance when they started after leaving Johnny's apartment. His stiff bones almost frozen from the cold sprang to life in a jolt of inner anger and repressed emotion. The young boys fist slamming into the wooden backrest of the bench. Frozen weather worn wood snapping and splintering and for that moment it all felt right. Rising to his feet he unleashed himself on the bench, kicking and stomping, hitting and screaming "IM NOT A GIRL! NOT A GIRL!" until it was nothing but a pile of broken wood that had been lucky to of lasted as long as it did though the winters punishment alone. Falling to his knees on the snow covered sidewalk breathing heavy as tears came to his eyes, his lips muttering over and over "Not a girl, not a girl, not a girl."
A crimson shade beginning to wash over the denim wrapped about his hands brought attention back from his thoughts, though so numb so very numb he couldn't feel more than the burn and sting of cold that had been there as long as he could remember, partly wondering if it had always been there. His fingers still twitched a moved as easy as one could move frozen joints, nothing was broken, just cut. His hands pressed into the cold snow as if to numb the pain, as if it were a makeshift ice pack. Alas no effort could numb that which haunted his mind. His hands stayed buried in the snow until the cold numbing began to burn and sting once more and he pulled them out. His body was so very stiff and he knew he would freeze to death if he didn't start moving again, and as hard as it was he finally he found the strength in his legs to stand, then to walk, leaving only a broken bench and two bloody handprints in the snow to ever show he was there.
Nightfall was coming on quick with the shortened days of winter, and the leopard didn't know if he could make it without warmth or food. Everything had been closed, wiped out until the winter storm of no determined length could pass. The money in his pocket was useless until the storm passed. 'A few more steps.' he thought to himself 'A few more steps and I'll be spent, I'll die out here.' and sure enough as he had predicted the lack of food, and the cold had finally taken him and his steps became weaker finally stumbling and going to his knees face first into the snow. His head turning to the side as he laid there waiting to die there was no hope, and no reason to have hope. At this moment he felt as if he had taken on the world and lost. His last words nothing but a laugh and "should of went with the cop."
He let his eyes open up just to get one last glimpse before he would close them and lay there until the final sleep would come. A light showed though the blur of snow so far away almost like a red flame down a long hall and he sighed. That must of been it, the light at the end of the tunnel. He knew not what would be at the light, but all he knew was to go towards it. It was all that was left for him to make that final move and escape the harsh reality of this city. Finding the strength to crawl he brought himself forward slowly working up to his knees, his legs quivering and wobbling as he worked to stand. Taking but a couple steps he found himself stumbling into a hard surface which he used to keep himself propped up and work towards the light. A smile crossed across the boys muzzle as he weakly stepped forward. He couldn't remember the last time he was able to sleep and finally if only he could make it he could sleep forever. His eyes closed he pushed himself off the wall and exerted everything he had in him to run. It was so bright he could see it though eyelids like staring into the sun eyes closed. So close, so very close, his arms reaching out only to feel something snatch him when he felt its warmth.
"KID WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" a voice cried out before he finally passed out and fell into what felt like the arms of death.