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Chapter 2 -why do I have to catch these things?

Albedo was a bit surprised as they reached the penthouse, it was a fucking 5 star resort in comparison to his 8 by 8 quarters on the Prodigium, he then noticed, chaos was gone, he wondered just how the hell that kid managed to disappear so easily then noticed the giant 140 inch flat screen TV mounted above the fireplace, that fucker was huge. He helped Rubedo into the bed in the room off to his right, then gave the penthouse first floor a quick run through, it had a huge bathroom with a Jacuzzi, shiny marble shitters, and oh yeah, a fucking sauna and some weird thing that squirted water UP your ass in the toilet, he figured it was for freaky bondage, he hoped that wasn't the case and it had a real use. As he opened another door he found a fucking pool, huge, fucking, pool. To the right side of the marble encased room was two hot tubs, bubbling away. He sighed then walked back to the kitchen and as was already usual, more marble and ultra-high class elitist amenities, plus a hell of a stock of food supplies, he then went upstairs, already believing the room he put Rubedo in to be the master, instead he found a GIANT bedroom with a bed that was big enough for ten people, and looked horrifically expensive, then out the door to his left was a marble bar, with every manner of booze he could process, all top shelf. He wondered, who the fuck pays for this shit? Oh wait, he just did, for a measly 5 grand, he was shocked, he basically just dry raped the owners wallet. As it sunk in he realized that this hotel was gonna make one hell of a mansion. After Citrine helped Albedo place Rubedo into a bedroom, she went to take a look at the place. She was in shock at what she was seeing, marble, lots and lots of it, I mean good god how much marble do you need for a place like this. Citrine was having some trouble processing this as she looked around. All the while the Lizard was following her around like a puppy, a badass puppy, but still cute. As Citrine made her way from the first floor to the second floor, she was being mindful of where she stepped, so that she doesn't trip on her feet like she normally does at times whenever she's walking and not paying attention. When she got up there she saw Albedo looking at a bar, but she quickly noticed that his eyes were trained on the liquor shelf, she then said quietly, "Holy shit..." While turning her head over to Albedo who looked like a kid in a candy store.

Albedo could not help but stare, there was tequila, schnapps of every color, even fucking absinthe, he said to citrine, eyes still fixed firmly on the party waiting to happen, "holy... fuck... I think I died and went to heaven... or hell... not sure yet, they both looked the same from my perspective, booze, glorious booze! Rubedo is gonna have a field day, I heard from Nigredo how he likes his, he's gonna love my specialty drink... hey, ... ....................." he dropped it for a moment then already was answered by not just a box, THE BOX! He walked over, almost tearing up, two boxes, he opened the box, inside were 20 Actual Cuban cigars. In the other box was not Cubans, something far more precious but, at the same time, extravagant, stogies made with real cannabis, the gods had shined light upon poor Albedo at last. He took a Cuban stogie and gave it to Citrine, the picked up one of the 5 golden zippo Lighters, then handed it to her as well, it he then took one and said "not until Rubedo wakes up." Then sat it down at the bar, he then noticed a buzzing, the door was buzzing, who could it be to ruin his day? He walked down the stairs and opened the elevator door, five people were inside, one introduced himself in a thick French accent, stereo typical chef, and said surprisingly "I am Jean Corelli, I am ze custodian," he sighed, more of slight relief then a young Japanese girl with crimson hair said "I am Rumi Takahata, and... I... I am the chef, I... well... oh never mind, I am just a bit excited is all." He could tell she was excited, but it seemed it wasn't pre work jitters, he ignored it as the one with silver hair and the flattest chest he had ever seen on a woman spoke "I am Natsuki Nanase, I am Rumi-Sama's assistant, this is Shizuko Azumi, the bartender, and this is Ethan Cole, he is the security chief." The bartender could not be more opposite of Natsuki, she was, well... poorly built for combat to say the least, while on the other hand the security chief seemed like a marine, he had the stare and the look to back it up, Albedo quickly asked "what unit were you in marine?" the security chief seemed shocked then retaliated "how many?" a good response, Albedo said "I think 300, maybe more, all of em were insurgents, piss poor, things went FUBAR for em the second they started thinking we were civvies." Ethan grinned and said "1stmarine division, HAZTEAM Bravo" Albedo went pale... this was THE Ethan Cole? He then immediately said "some pact... anyway good to have ya Lieutenant" Ethan suddenly turned pale, as if they both realized that it was in fact reality, Ethan then said "well, at least you are better in person, nice to meet you too Albedo." The others looked confused, as they walked off to their duties, Ethan stayed and said "so... you know then?" Albedo smiled and said "yeah the books say you were the one who exposed everything on Area 51, they killed ya in 2048," he sighed and nodded then said "I don't get it, I was dead, how the fuck did I wake up here? This world is FUBAR, but I am still military and now I meet you? Well, it's gonna be fun." As he saluted then walked off to do something.

Meanwhile... T-ELOS woke up in a cold sweat, then realized her hangover was far worse than she feared, her head felt like a bombing range, maybe it was payback for kicking KOS-MOS' ass so many times, for once she felt bad about it, she noticed Kevin was trying to call someone for food, using an old telephone, for the first time since arrival she got serious, yet not the way Kevin hoped, she drew her blade and said "I don't give a fuck who's house this is, it's MINE NOW! GET THE FUCK OUT! I do not and WILL not take orders from you ever again." He replied angrily "you will do as I say or else I wi..." the other woman said "oh you are so sexy when you are angry" she smiled then said "fine, I am leaving, see ya" and just as she hoped the older woman said "kay, now... Kevin..." as she left Kevin to a most unfortunate fate she then began walking, she walked into a forest, since she could smell smoke, and where there is smoke there is fire, and this smoke had burnt human in it.

When James woke up from getting the shit beaten out of him, he couldn't even get up do to the sheer amount of pain his balls were in, he then said, "Oh...my poor balls..." He moved his head to look around...he then screamed like a little girl, there was a leg to his right, an intestine hanging from his head along with an eyeball all burnt with some fire still burning, hell his hair was slightly on fire and across his stomach was a spine with a head still on looking straight at him with dead eyes...that was until it blinked and it's tongue rolled out of its mouth, touching the skin of his stomach. James jumped away from the human rattle, his eyes wide as plates from fear as he looked all around him...total destruction everywhere, trees blackened, body parts every which way you turn, blood dripping from the leaves of the trees, the smell of death was strong, it looked like hell had just rose up. James started to slightly hyperventilate, he's never seen this much blood and gore in his life, he wished to god that he would never cross paths with those...monsters ever again... He started to shake where he stood, his hands wouldn't stop shaking as if they had nerve damage; which they did...he touched his arm and felt how warm it was, the sheer heat from...from whatever they did, caused the nerves in his hands to, basically melt into a puddle of gooey flesh. He had second degree burns all over his body, some of his clothes were fused into his skin making it hard to walk, he whispered to himself, "My God...what have we done...we just pissed off the wrong...they aren't human..." James then noticed Jessie and she...well was far worse off than he was, second degree burns on her body as well, some of her hair was missing, like a good half of it was just gone, vaporized. James started to feel weak in the knees until he collapsed back on the ground from the reality of what happened to them finally sunk in. Jessie started to wake up...but everything hurt like hell, she could barely move without feeling a bone move on its own from her own body...she slowly got up seeing that James was already awake. As she got up, she stepped on a foot...and well...puss showered her body and got all over into every little place in her hair...she was a mess and now stunk like she crawled out of a farm that just got a fresh supply of manure. Jessie screamed profanities left and right about her now ruined hair, as if it was her own fucking life...Jessie could feel everything in her jaw hurt...she could feel some of the bones move on their own. As James heard Jessie go on and on about her looks, he wondered where the hell Meowth went. He couldn't see him anywhere, in the field of death.

As the two were realizing what they had just barely survived a Team Rocket helo was inbound, as it flew overhead the pilot said to the rescue crew "my fucking god... its... hell down there, everything in a 5 kilometer radius is dead... burnt or... ripped apart, whatever Pokémon did this was powerful, my god is that Perez? OH GOD NO!, he's..." the pilot paused, he saw his brothers charred and shredded corpse in the field face down, there wasn't much left of anyone, yet he knew that man had a huge necklace, he said over the comms "Affirmative, all 300 local personnel are KIA, its... messy sir, it's a goddamned bloodbath down there, they are all... no... closed casket, more like bucket and mop... it's that bad sir, no no sign of anything alive." Just then he saw two people standing, he then said immediately "wait sir... we got two, no not three, the meowth is MIA, uhh it looks pretty goddamned bad from up here. Yeah better go pick them up." As the helo made one more pass then came in to land. James heard what sounded like helo coming in, he got up and started screaming, "OI! GET US OUTA THIS HELLHOLE!! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!" Jessie heard the helo and what James made her give him the finger for saying that he was too young to die...But of course James didn't see her give him the finger and continued yelling the most oddest, fucked up things at the helo as it came down for a landing. As the helicopter landed the door swung open, as two soldiers jumped out, they looked at what they were both standing on, a heap of burnt dismembered corpses, they looked at James who was spouting insane bullshit, then got back into the chopper, another got out, then said "fuck you too asshole!" he walked up to James and then saw Jessie, he ran to her and yelled "MEDIC!!! WE NEED A FUCKING MEDIC NOW DOUBLE TIME IT YA PUSSIES!" as the others begrudgingly stepped out into the killing field, they brought a stretcher and quickly sedated Jessie, who was more concerned about her hair than her life, the sedative worked quickly, James was pissed, a soldier walked up and asked "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED HERE?" James blubbered and finally said "three... three teenagers... one had guns... another... took my innocence... he... shoved his hand into my mind... the other... Oh god... they were monsters, they did this, they... killed everyone, Carlos... Perez... he just... wouldn't die! They shot him in the head six times, it just... grew back, and that... that laugh, he was fucking insane... he enjoyed it, he ripped Carlos' head off, there... " he pointed at the spine with a head then continued "he just... rammed his hand in, and yanked it out... then he said ... TO FUCKIN BLINK!!!" he began breaking down then said "then, he... raped my brain... he made me his bitch! He just... he had white hair and violet eyes, and that grin... pure fucking evil... I remember hearing, I am the Alpha and Omega..., if he's god... then we are all going to die... they took a Pikachu, but... I don't know they were eating a Sawsbuck... cooking it, when we showed up... that kid, he was psychic, they all were..." as the soldier had enough he then sedated James too... then said "how's she looking?" the medic said "half dead, she's shredded, got second degree burns all over, OH FUCK?! She's going into V-FIB, get them onboard NOW!" as they did they found casings for a 9mm handgun... no one on the team had one... they piled in to the chopper and took off, the pilot then said "yeah, James is shell-shocked... Meowth is not KIA, he's POW... Jessie is coding... we need priority landing, Jessie is likely the only one who will answer properly... she better live... Affirmative sir. En route now" the chopper flew quickly to the nearest hospital... right in the city where their assailants were, as well as Nigredo.

T-ELOS watched as a helicopter took off, in the distance. She walked out into a massive clearing, one that obviously was the result of one hell of a firestorm, she said to herself in disbelief "holy... and I thought I was death incarnate. Damn, I guess these random creatures can get really really pissed off. Huh... wait a minute." She walked up to a 9mm casing, she recognized it, Makarov rounds. Her eyes went wide, she realized what happened... he happened. She watched. She noticed a bit of movement in the field, the ground was moving, then, suddenly the ground beneath her gave way... she fell through a sinkhole and hit something metal, she slid off the hull and managed to grab a external access lift door, she looked to her right and saw the words "Elsa Von Brabant" on the side of the hull, she pulled herself up and hacked the door. As expected the lift came up and she got inside, as the lift descended she wondered, how the hell does this ship always teleport into caves? When she reached the bottom she was in the engineering deck, she promptly made her way to where all the lifeforms where, predictably the bar area. When she entered they were talking about portals and cascades. Then suddenly the only person who reacted was KOS-MOS, who instinctively drew her sidearm, T-ELOS sighed then said "not in the mood. But you can show me where to sit......" she noticed something on her spectrum scanner, something that proved her drunk dream to be true. She said nothing of it her analysis only taking 5 milliseconds, then finished "hey toilet paper head, gimme a Derry's and some peanuts." She sat down next to KOS-MOS, then whispered into her ear "do you remember what happened last night?" KOS-MOS said "no, why?" T-ELOS said "cause you got a bit of... stuff on your chin." KOS-MOS face turned as red as her eyes, she wished to god already she didn't get plastered, now even more so. T-ELOS then asked "does he know?" she shook her head. T-ELOS was relieved. She then said "well, we both got a hangover. Anyway, that contest can wait, we are finally free. What's on the idiot box?" KOS-MOS said "nothing, no signal, but there is some recordings of the Seraphim sisters. Which Matthews insists upon, then again it's the only thing on this ships data drives right now." T-ELOS glanced at Allen and the others, who gave a knowing look, she then said "aww hell no, let's go sis, You guys coming or what?" all of them said "YES!" in unison, likely to avoid the captains obsession with the synthpop stars. She then said "there is a road near here, but we gotta take the cave out, then we can head straight into New York, I think there is a hotel there that is decent enough." They all followed, KOS-MOS was sure to steal all the booze from the captains stash, placing it neatly in her space compression storage unit. He wouldn't know until it was too late. With that they set off to find anything but where they were.

When Albedo left to go check who could be at our door, Citrine followed, curiosity taking over her. She walked out of the bar, the master suite and down the stairs to see a marine who was in civilian clothes, but what caught her eye was a girl with crimson hair, Citrine could tell that she was excited based on her stance. She also noticed a girl with silver hair that was standing next to the crimson haired girl, she also saw some others there as well. Citrine then started to feel a bit paranoid around the new comers, she always had problems with trusting people she doesn't know and it makes it harder for her to start a conversation unless they started one first with her usually she would fight otherwise, or argue her way out of dealing with them. Shizuko quickly went up to the bar, she had heard the presidential suite had everything, until she saw that it had even more, even pot cigars. She quickly did an inventory while the others did their thing. Rumi noticed Citrine via a mirror near the door, standing on the stairs, she quickly analyzed her, then smirked, she could tell several things, she was military, she was a fractured mind, she seemed attractive and thus... a perfect target. She glanced at Natsuki who caught the hint, then said "I will go prepare lunch Rumi-Sama." She left for the kitchen, but not to look for food, Rumi and Natsuki both knew that they both were covered in gore, normally a problem, but they were military and likely needed a shower, slowly she got what she needed, Meanwhile Rumi did what she did best, seem harmless. Although she was positive that the woman in the stairwell was easy prey, the white haired killer in front of her was a challenge, she liked challenges, as always she would get what she wanted. Or so she believed. Ethan on the other hand was doing his job, he had no clue that two of the people with him had ulterior motives, if he did he likely would panic, he couldn't possibly imagine what was to come.

Shion was standing in the ER wondering what the hell all the fuss was about when two severely injured and burned people came in, she was told there was an accident, she could see that there was no accident at play here, someone did this to them, and wanted them to live. She quickly went to work on the two using her advanced "experimental" procedures, she had no idea she was helping the enemy. Yet despite this, in a matter of moments they were stable, "well they should be ready for discharge in about 6 hours" she told the doctor, who had the look of shock at how she healed them so quickly. She did however heal the woman's hair too, Shion was not a fashion Nazi but she knew when bad fashion could literally kill someone, if so, then this woman was fucking Medusa, her hair was the embodiment of pure evil. So without hesitation she fixed her hair into something that actually looked good, which said a lot. Shion Sighed deeply as she noticed a commotion outside the hospital, the bank was being robbed, how lovely what she did not expect to see out the window shocked her.

T-ELOS had finally made it into the city thanks to a generous donation by a civilian, he was so nice that he gave her his truck, poor bastard. She ran out of gas down the street however and was forced to walk the rest of the way to the hotel, as the group walked they noticed sirens heading the same direction, and three people in masks running towards a construction site, she figured out immediately what was happening, a bank robbery, Tony said "we aren't just gonna let em get away are we?" KOS-MOS responded "I can kill them easily and efficiently without drawing attent...." She was cut off by T-ELOS saying "oh fuck anonymity watch this, this is gonna be fun!" she ran and jumped onto a moving steamroller and threw the driver out of it, then floored it as she headed to run over the oblivious bandits. As they turned to see the now quickly moving construction vehicle barreling towards them, like idiots they ran away but not out of its path, the woman in the driver seat was grinning ear to ear, as slowly but surely she caught up with one, as it ran him over a sickening crunching splat was heard as his insides quickly came squirting out his head like chunky mustard, then the second, and finally the one holding the bag, she leapt out of the steamroller and on top of him, relieving him of his stolen money, then she threw the bag aside and cloaked, watching in glee as he screamed while he was emptied all over the drying concrete like a tube of toothpaste, then she walked back to the group and continued to the hotel, smiling, Tony and hammer were speechless, Cherenkov was put into an instant PTSD attack from KOS-MOS actions on carioca, and KOS-MOS simply said "Really? Was that necessary?" T-ELOS said smugly "sure... it was abso-fucking-lutely necessary, and hilarious. You can't tell me it wasn't funny" KOS-MOS rolled her eyes and said "wow, you really are the epitome of subtlety, no wonder you wear such skimpy armor, you don't know what subtle means at all do you?" She said "nope... but hey, managed to lift a few grand outta the bag, enjoy!" as she continued her cheerful stride. Shion was mortified, she just watched a KOS-MOS doppelganger steamroll a bunch of thugs, she then sighed, and said to the doctor "well, no point in surgery, morgue... Goddamnit." She stormed out and went to check on Nigredo at least he was sane, or so she thought.

As Albedo was wandering around looking at the sights of his newfound mega mansion, he could not help but feel uneasy, as if something was coming, he went into the upstairs area to find Rumi doing something, he immediately realized she was hiding, not from him however, he walked silently towards her, then noticed what she was doing, she was stalking Citrine, he immediately tried to probe her mind at a distance, not easy, but safe, what he saw however was not Rumi, but Natsuki, with a loud screech he was violently booted from Rumi's mind, his eyes began to bleed, as his head hurt like hell... he groaned in pain as he nearly fell backwards down the stairs, whatever the hell that was, it just kicked his ass. Rumi however noticed him, then as if annoyed said "what are you doing Alby-kun?" he replied weakly "having a goddamned migraine... how bout you?" she laughed and said "sure... you weren't spying on me were you?" he said with a bit more anger "spying on Citrine is not wise if you want to live, get the fuck downstairs and make me a sandwich..." she whined a bit then did as ordered, she knew she was busted... however she would find a way, or better yet, she wanted to target him instead, he did threaten her, so she decided to do just that, when the time was right, she would capture him, then, god have mercy, she would not... as she left Albedo watched, then chuckled, then heard a noise, he turned around to see Natsuki literally materialize in front of him, then pull out a glowing blue blade, without effort or noise she pinned him to the wall, then put the blade to his neck and said "threatening Rumi-Sama is unwise if you wish to keep your soul URTV... this is your only warning insect..." with a slash she cut his arm, yet it did not regenerate for 30 seconds, thirty seconds he was absolutely terrified, she had disappeared but his wound did not... he then noticed that whatever the fuck that was... he obviously did not want to challenge it. He then walked to the bar just in time for Citrine to not have seen what the fuck just happened.

Rumi had just walked down the stairs and entered the Kitchen where Natsuki was rather cheerfully making noodles of some kind, yet seemed kind of, blank for a moment then suddenly said "ah Rumi-Sama, I have been preparing lunch," she smiled and said "target Albedo instead, he's a challenge" she smiled and said under her breath "no he's not" then said "Yes Rumi-Sama" the only person that actually saw this was oddly the custodian who was telling Ethan about how he saw what happened to Albedo, yet Ethan was at the foot of the stairs watch Natsuki cook, which befuddled him, both of them actually. But Ethan knew better, his stint in Area 51 taught him not to assume anything. He would confront her on his own time however, as this was not truly his problem, what was his problem was keeping the giant pest problem of people that would likely try to kill all of them under control.

While Natsuki was not a fool she did her best to cover for the fact that she was not cooking for just the people in the penthouse but also the others who were about to arrive, it was not her best day, seeing how she would be seeing two Mary Magdalene's and Yeshua, but she managed, she just couldn't figure out how to make Mansaf and Shawarma to save her life, two of his favorite foods, so she made spaghetti instead, another of his favorites... she however loved a good plate of Takoyaki, more like a whole box of em, Natsuki didn't show it much but she ate more than anyone in history, since she could do so easily without gaining weight, odd, since it was gluttony, she didn't care, she was hoping at least her friend would visit, but she could understand if she chose not to given the circumstances.

Meanwhile, in the lobby a very angry KOS-MOS was dealing with some asshole of a clerk about a credit card, he would not accept her currency, she had no idea what the fuck poke was, nor did she care, she had more than enough creds to buy the whole city. She simply decided to say "for the last time, if you don't give me a room you worthless fucking human I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL RIP YOUR FUCKING HEART OUT LIKE I DID TO KEVIN!" the clerk said in a whiney voice not even realizing the danger before him "I am sorry, please contact our customer service" Tony said "can we see the manager please?" the douchbag replied "he is currently in the presidential suite sir, I can however call him if you like" Tony said "do it" as the douchebag did so, Albedo heard an annoying ringing noise on the bar, he was annoyed by it but knew it was some POS phone he picked up the receiver and heard some douchebag whining about someone's credit card being declined, he had enough, he yelled into the receiver "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM DEUTSCHEBAGG? I DON'T NEED SOME PATHETIC GERMAN SAUERKRAUT PIECE OF SHIT WHINING AT ME ABOUT FUCKING CREDITS! IF THEY HAVE A FUCKING PROBLEM KICK THEIR FUCKING ASSES! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! I JUST GOT MY ASS HANDED TO ME BY SOME FUCKING HO IN PIGTAILS... I DON'T" as Albedo ranted and raved at the poor clerk everyone heard their favorite psychopath, then just, headed to the elevator. Albedo continued however as the poor poor clerk could do nothing but listen "SO DO YOUR MOTHERFUCKING JOB AND SHUT THE FLYING FUCK UP YOU SORRY PIG FUCKING ASSCLAP!" he slammed the phone down and sighed... surprisingly enough Shizuko walked up to the bar and asked "let me guess, Natsuki?" he looked at her in puzzlement and said "ye?" she said "I don't know... one minute she can be doing something, the next, I just... don't know, one guy tried to mug Rumi, she was across the city from where Natsuki was, I watched her just come out of the alley and beat the fuck out of him... she scares the shit outta me... " Albedo whined, saying "ya think?" suddenly the elevator went ding, he sighed as he walked to it, only to hear screeching of doors being pried open.

Ethan drew his SMG and aimed at the two girls walking in, one simply laughed at him the other said "please put that down." He wondered, what the fuck were they doing? Together??? He dropped the SMG and put his hands up, he knew who they were, and they terrified the shit out of him, T-ELOS caught on to this, then said "good boy! Now roll over!" he didn't know if he should comply or if she was being sarcastic, Albedo walked down the stairs to see this scene, everyone from the Elsa, and that Android, and... another more... ballsy one, he sighed deeply, then as he looked he saw Chaos literally appear in the elevator, "WHAT THE FUCK?! NOT AGAIN TWO OF THEM!?" KOS-MOS thought he was talking about her, and failed to notice a certain person walk past them, Albedo whined even more, his mind was going to shit faster than Miltia.

Then Natsuki rushed out and did the strangest thing, she bowed to Chaos... everyone, even Rumi was surprised, as if somehow this... pretty boy had more authority. Then, she dropped the bomb that Albedo never thought he would hear, she said "Yehsua, so good to see you sir..." Albedo somehow glanced at Rumi, then passed his basket straight into the dumpster... "your last name really isn't fuck?!" as he just walked back up the stairs to see Shizuko, and Rubedo, both saw it, Shizuko said "I will get the bottles..." Albedo was beyond any sanity, he just heard a flat chested girl in pigtails call that kid sir and Yeshua in the same sentence, he sat down at the bar and said "so... when were you planning on telling me that Chaos was motherfucking Jesus Fucking Christ?" Rubedo simply stared... Shizuko however said something odd "well, it can't be worse than how I woke up this morning." Albedo said "Why?" she smiled and said "well... this morning I got shot in the back of the head by some cultists... they wanted to sacrifice Rumi to the elder gods in exchange for rule of the universe. Then, it gets worse, I woke up in a burger king with some guy staring at my tits. Then... I kinda woke up in a jail cell... supposedly I am guilty of fifteen counts of murder 1, so yeah, then I woke up again... this time, I was in a dressing room for this weird ass job. All this happened over the course of, I dunno 30 minutes? So I don't care how bad your day has been, mine was shit."

Albedo nodded in agreement, as did Rubedo, then oddly KOS-MOS walked in and said "oh wait, it gets worse, I am Mary Magdalene of the intergalactic house of pancakes... I want... wait, last time I got trashed... fuck never mind. Derry's please?" Shizuko cocked her head, then KOS-MOS said "fuck... beer then. Something sweet" Shizuko handed her a Sam Adams Summer Ale, she took one sip and spit it out and yelled in anger "I SAID SWEET NOT BITTER AS FUCK!!" KOS-MOS got up and decided to do something, Albedo was staring at Rubedo hoping for some kind of answer to the insanity. As usual, it didn't take long. Suddenly, the sky went from sunny to... category 5 hurricane.

Meanwhile on a rooftop 15 feet away from the hotel two figures were watching what was unfolding with all the occupants, but they were more concerned about Citrine and Albedo than anyone else. The figure on the left turned towards the other looking at them with piercing sapphire-blue eyes and said, "So...when do we make our move?" The other one turned to meet the sapphire-blue eyed figure with piercing crimson-red eyes, and replied, "Soon...soon...but for now, we will watch and wait for the prefect time to reveal ourselves to them...you heard what Yehsua said." The sapphire-blue eyed one nodded their head, "Yeah, I remember, no need to remind me, asshole..." The crimson-red eyed one smirked and replied, "Right back at ya, dragon bitch." The sapphire-blue eyed one looked at the other, "Oi! It's Draonic, you multicolored winged asshole!" The other chuckled and replied, "And it's Je'ssa too ya, Draonic the Tusander General!" Thus they went back and forth arguing over the stupidest of things, until they heard thunder and it started to rain. Je'ssa jumped up and ran towards the door to the roof on which they were on with Draonic tailing behind her with her tail swinging back and forth and her wings were relaxed. Draonic saw Je'ssa's wings shot up when she heard the thunder and Draonic knew what that meant, good old PTSD attack. When Draonic caught up to Je'ssa who's eyes were as wide as plates, sighed and said, "You're going to be fine, Je'ssa. Now come on, we have a penthouse to sneak into." Je'ssa heard what Draonic said and just nodded her head, Je'ssa still couldn't understand how Draonic could be so comfortable with her wings out in public without worry, but she didn't care. Je'ssa would get to see malathu again, she hoped that everything was okay back home, she hoped the others would be okay. Draonic knew the way to get into the hotel's penthouse with ease and undetected, Draonic and Je'ssa made their way through the vents without making too much noise.

Albedo noticed Ethan stand up and say "hey, what is that? I heard something " Albedo replied sarcastically "It's a pedophile in the vents." Ethan simply looked at him with sheer annoyance, then heard something above him again, he saw a panel that was removed for maintenance on the vents, he saw nothing inside, but he knew he heard something... he pulled out his SMG then as in typical fashion for a marine, fired a few rounds on both ends... a few of them hit someone, he then trained onto it then was about to unload his weapon on it, but all he heard was a click, Natsuki stepped in front then said "no" then looked up and said "come down from there... idiots." From the open vent shaft came down two figures, one looked like a dragon female, but was in a humanoid form that had grey scales with blue folds in the wings while wearing a combat ready leather jacket that had dents in it from the gunshots, had combat ready pants and boots that matched her colors while the female who was standing next to her had greyish-silver hair with the deepest crimson eyes anyone has ever seen. She was wearing a black trench coat with white highlights with a white under-shirt, black jeans and grey shoes along with a necklace that had the Yin-Yang symbol on the chain. The dragon female spoke first, "What were we supposed to do? Knock on the door and hope to god that y'all don't freak out on us..." The silveret sighed and replied, "It was not my idea...Natsuki...you try reasoning with her..." Albedo sighed, he was already sober, he heard the song of Nephilim, met an archangel, and now there were even more sexy women, one was a dragon anthro, another was a... he wasn't quite sure, she had one black wing and the other was white, her eyes were a demonic red color, yet he honestly didn't care, she had the same eyes as KOS-MOS, which was odd. Were all biblical entities so damned sexy? He always pictured them as assholes, ugly or just a bunch of self-righteous men, this was different, hell even though Natsuki was flat as a board she was sexy and cute. Albedo sighed then said "I honestly... don't give a fuck, I got more women than I know what to do with now. So, pleasantries aside, how the fuck do we get home? I mean its not like they have UMN access or even space flight. " The silveret sighed and said under her breath, "No shit Sherlock..." But then said out loud, "That's what I want to know..." Albedo then said to Tony who was off to the side watching them, or more specifically their tits, "is the Elsa still, in one piece? Can it fly?" he replied "You bet!" Albedo was happy at least something worked, he then asked "Well, before we go and try and escape, what's your names?" The dragoness was the first to answer with a salute, "My name is General Draonic of the First Division of the Royal Dragon army and the rest...you don't need to know at this time...not yet away." Draonic then proceeded to stare off into space with a haunted look on her face. The silveret sighed and then replied, "Don't mind Draonic here, she's always like that whenever someone of a military background askes what her name is...anyway, my name is Je'ssa Thuun'La...just please call me Je'ssa..." Je'ssa noticed the guy in the corner staring and then said, "OI! MY EYES ARE UP HERE BAKA!!!" Albedo listened half-heartedly at them, only paying attention to Je'ssa's name after he heard the word general, he noticed the dragoness had a bit of PTSD, obvious due to the thousand yard stare, he immediately decided to take action due to her rather convenient lack of attention, he walked up to her then quite immediately began to neurohack her, a brute force intrusion, he did not like need to know basis of things, he successfully caught her off guard, and surprisingly got more info than he could ever want, too much to process in fact, he could only see bits and pieces, she was not part of this universe, none of them were, she was part of the Experimental Dimensional Force, a spec ops group, as he suspected, yet nothing quite like that. He was a bit scared of the shit he saw, this woman was far more dangerous than he could have ever imagined, he rather suddenly wished he had not just made a obviously fatal mistake until he saw something else, some transdimensional war against... hell? He withdrew having seen enough to scramble his brain, no doubt he was a dead man, yet he had his doubts as to her reacting violently, as she had most likely been trained to resist just this kind of attempt, yet, she just let him have the information.

Upon this realization he immediately made another, he was truly fucked for another reason. He was right about everything. He had seen it when he linked on Miltia, yet never knew it could be so... infinite. As he withdrew he sighed deeply then said "Forgive me, I hate need to know basis bullshit, but honestly, I did not need to know that, ever... I could have lived my whole existence and not wanted to see that." Natsuki rolled her eyes, she knew Albedo would do that, she glanced at Je'ssa then said "So, why are you here again? Don't tell me, bored? I know the war has been over for a decade but damn, well... welcome to the party, I can't wait to see how Rumi-Sama reacts to what's to come." The truth was that she too was bored. However she did not expect some kid to cause a resonance cascade, and to top it off it was the fault of a random coin toss app on his pc, she hated that kind of bullshit, but what was to be simple and ultimately boring, just ended up being the birth of an empire... again. Je'ssa let out a chuckle and replied, "You could say that, I mean can you blame me? I mean I love my charge and all, but you know as well as I do that when shit hits the fan...oh...nevermind...and just for the record Draonic followed me here...it was not my idea for her to come, it just happened." As Je'ssa was talking with Natsuki about stuff, Draonic, who was now out of her PTSD attack, looked at Albedo and said, "I know you hate that shit, that's why I didn't resist you, Albedo." She continued to look into his eyes as if she was peering into his soul, "You and I are the same, Albedo. You have a brother and so do I, but that's where the difference comes in, you have your brother with you, I, however, can't see my brother...I want to see him again, just one more time, to know if he's alright..." Draonic sighed, but continued, "We've both been through hell..." Draonic then whispered in Albedo's ear, "Let me know if you ever need help with your PTSD...don't ask how I know...I just do, alright?" Albedo sighed then said with annoyance "I don't need help with my so called PTSD, I need help killing things... in fact no, I don't. I can manage all by myself." Draonic just sighed at what Albedo said and replied in a haunting tone, "You are just like me when I was your age...not wanting anyone's help, thinking like you're the only one that you can trust....well, that's not always the case....I'll say this though, it's never too late. It's never too late, Albedo."

Meanwhile KOS-MOS was watching something on the TV, although she was bored as all hell, she was just waiting for the others to decide what to do about this situation, she saw how there were some people holding a Pokémon tournament, some guy on the show was remarking about how a true Pokémon trainer has to catch them all so to speak, she was joined by T-ELOS who remarked "why do we have to catch these... things?" KOS-MOS responded "I dunno, its catchy, and honestly whatever. Don't mean to sound all hippy and all, but shouldn't these things have the right to choose whether they be pets or not? I mean, some can talk, right?" T-ELOS took the ball with the Garfield in it, then said "why don't we go ask this critter that, besides, we might find a use for it, it has hands, so it can use a gun right?" KOS-MOS grinned lightly then walked up the stairs, they were taking too long anyway.

None of them had any clue exactly what was to come, not really. Yet that was the fun part. Albedo however was not having fun, not yet. Slowly as the hurricane spread, a being of immense power was about to utilize a even greater power in his goals.

Albedo watched as the dark skinned version of KOS-MOS walked in and said "so... you got a prisoner huh? Lets interrogate it." She chuckled darkly as KOS-MOS walked in behind her, wishing to god this world had heard of Derry's beer, every single beer on earth had to be desecrated by this disgusting plant called hops, she missed the old days when beer tasted good and wasn't guaranteed to make you drunk, when she used to drink beer it was preferable to water, which back then was more likely to give you parasites or the screaming shits, she sighed then noticed that grin on her sister's face, she wondered what was in the baseball shaped space compression device, T-ELOS seemed to have an idea, while Albedo grinned lightly then said "alright... let the little fucker out, just don't kill him." T-ELOS smiled then pressed the button, in a flash it opened and spat out the Garfield looking creature, who simply said "FUCK!" as he plopped to the ground, Albedo thought a short vacation sounded nice, but the Garfield seemed to have a different opinion, he then stood up and said "where the hell am I? what the?! Oh.... Fuck..." as he noticed everyone around him, he seemed to like T-ELOS a bit, as evidenced by his facial expressions as he saw her, Albedo wondered why a xenomorph like that would be interested in a human, then again, miss Dragon wasn't too bad herself... in fact both of them were nice, he then asked the Garfield "so... whats your name?" the Garfield responded "I am Meowth? I... am... a meowth, actually." Albedo was a bit puzzled then asked "so you name yourself after your species? How... odd, what do you have some kind of over inflated ego or something?" he then remembered one of the memories he stole from the very dysfunctional James, they usually don't have names, and they never talk. He then said "well... you look more like... Garfield to be honest, so that's what I am gonna call you. How does that sound?" Meowth chuckled and said "why Garfield?" then said "oh never mind, whatever... why am I here?" with a slight bit of fear in his voice.

Albedo smiled then said "well, pursuant to Galaxy Federation Charter Subsection 37 you are a prisoner of war, and honestly be grateful I am going by federation rules, UTIC would have you just be shot in the back of the head." Meowth knew immediately what Prisoner of war meant, then said "so... I am going to die aren't I?" Albedo sighed then said "no... actually you seem... unique to be honest, from what I could tell from that sick perverted excuse for a human, you are the only... pokemon on this planet that speaks English, so that makes you something of a celebrity now doesn't it?" Meowth replied nervously "uhh, actually I learned English to impress... a girl." Albedo laughed and said "how did that go?" Meowth sighed then said "well, she... it didn't go well," Albedo then asked, "so, you always been interested in humans?" Meowth was shocked, he actually thought he learned to impress a human? He then said defensively "no! it was... another... meowth actually? Wait... that actually isn't a bad idea." He glanced at T-ELOS, who caught on to his thought, then replied by transforming her left arm into a flamethrower and said "sure... I like extra crispy though." Meowth suddenly turned back to Albedo and said "uhh never mind." Albedo laughed and said "well I guess shes not your type... or anyones for that matter." Meowth sheepishly replied "ya don't say?" then sat down on a chair, and asked "so what is going to happen to me?" Albedo sighed then said "well... depends really, from what I can tell, you seem little more than Jessie and james pet. Thing is, just about everyone here would agree that anything capable of speaking English and being attracted to another species, much less use a chair is self aware. If you are self aware then by all rights you should be free to do whatever the fuck you want. Civil rights and all that bullshit, then again, from what I saw they don't really hold you in such... well they don't even view you as a person. Perhaps I can offer better." Meowth looked puzzled, yet he knew that what Albedo was saying was very true, he was lucky he wasn't forced to stay in a poke ball, Albedo grabbed a sidearm off the table, then tossed it to Meowth and said "see that bottle over there?" Meowth nodded as he held the weapon.

Albedo chuckled as Ethan seemed worried, to ethan, giving this creature a pistol was not a good idea, however he just watched. Albedo then said "shoot the bottle, I want to see if you can hit a target." Meowth took aim, then fired, the recoil was not too heavy, yet despite that he still showed obvious signs of lack of practice, yet surprisingly he hit the bottle, then said "easy. Why?" Albedo then asked "would those two assfucks entrust you with a 45?" meowth knew immediately where this was going and honestly Albedo was right, no human would ever give him or any pokemon a firearm, yet seemingly Albedo was doing just that. "so? Is it a bit too heavy? 45's are good with stopping power but are heavy on recoil, carry less ammo, and often are hard to even find ammo for, I think you might be better with a 40 or 9 millimeter, what do you think?" Meowth was shocked, now the guy was giving options? Meowth wasn't sure if he should ask or not, then decided to anyway and asked "why not a... MP7?" Albedo was a bit surprised, even Rubedo glanced over at the suddenly interesting creature. Albedo said happily "sure, if we find one. But first, wouldn't you like some food?" Meowth for a split second was wondering if he would be eating more kibble or something else, before he could finish said thought however Shizuko gave him a plate of Spaghetti and said "enjoy." As she went and got a coke and then gave it to the little creature, Meowth was shocked, almost too shocked for words, he then almost tearfully said "why are you being so nice to me?" Rubedo then said "what? Even prisoners of war get treated right, then again I think you might be interested in joining us instead." Albedo then said "if you want, sure, be pretty neat seeing a pokemon with human rights. Might just inspire others ya know." Meowth suddenly said "are you sure? Is that even legal?" Rubedo glanced at Albedo then said "ehh, probably not, seems your world is, different, but who the fuck cares?" Albedo then said "fuck as far as I am concerned you might as well vote too... I don't give a flying fuck, they have a problem with basic civil rights I am more than happy to start... well... lets just say it wont end well for them, Margulis taught me a few tricks so to speak." Meowth then said happily "sure, but what am I supposed to do?" Rubedo then said "whatever we do I guess, you do know what teamwork is right?" Meowth nodded then said "sure, and I can translate what pokemon say, not so sure about handling a gun, but I can practice. You have a fork?" Shizuko then said "uhh actually, where the hell did the... oh son of a bitch," then ran downstairs... when she came back she had a whole tray of them then handed one to meowth. Meowth then started eating, it was the best meal he ever had to be sure, he never tried a coke before either, for once people were treating him like he was human, he kind of wondered why he never thought of using his unique skills in such a way, then suddenly as if having the mother of all revelations, realized that he was picked up by team rocket right after he started speaking, he never could have had a chance if he tried. As he ate he pondered his life choices and what he could do, it seemed less and less like these humans were taking him prisoner and more like liberating him. As Albedo sat down, quite content that the thing could see simple logic, and that he actually seemed to be giving the best gift that little felinoid ever received made Albedo feel a bit good, something he rarely felt these days.

unfortunately his break from the bullshit was to be short lived, there was a loud explosion in the distance as the lights went out, across half the city no less, he saw the source, lightning hit some kind of cylinder, he sighed then said "primitive electrical grid... when will they learn to at least put the shit underground?" as if the lack of lights wasn't bad enough, suddenly he heard something. Everyone stood up in the dark, as lightning echoed with thunderous booms, the noise was not enough to drown out the sound. They all knew, save for Meowth. Meowth's fur raised up, he knew something was wrong, Albedo said simply "God Damnit..." then... he looked out the window into the storm darkened city, he said "well Garfield... you might not need to wait for target practice..." T-ELOS began laughing, as KOS-MOS drew her sidearm, the worst was yet to come. Not even the dark could stop Draonic from seeing Je'ssa cover her head, she knew it was more than the storm, it was something else as well. Draonic pulled out from a hidden pocket in her coat a weapon of unknown make, suddenly a siren echoed, Albedo heard something, gunshots? Not this soon? Suddenly explosions echoed in the distance, he could hear it, sudden and violent, it had already started, it seemed that he was suddenly beginning to wish to god he never opened his mouth to Draonic, Citrine began to panic, he then felt a chill... a chill he hadn't felt in fourteen years.

They watched as it began. All unto madness. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

TO BE CONTNUED

So, it took us both two weeks to do anything due to medical problems, seems winter wasn't done with either of us, we both got sick, Citrine ended up in the hospital having surgery, and me? I ended up shitting myself to death almost, kinda lost my marbles when my temp hit 104.6 or so, we had the chapter almost finished last Saturday, but since she was in the ER and I was complaining about how bugs bunny stole my century (no bullshit, I totally lost my mind in a hell of a fever) we took a whopping thirty minutes today finishing the chapter, Citrine is sore as all hell from her surgery and I am swimming in antibiotics, I feel worse than Tali after her fun time with Shepard, and in all honesty I am just happy its going away, I am sure Citrine wants to say something

Citrine: yes I do, thank you very much....anyway, I was in the hospital and the day I got back, well...Albedo bombed me with questions and how much he missed me(I did miss him while I was at the hospital). It was not a fun time for either of us. Alb edo : my hands hurt and for some reason my mother says I ate a few condoms? So I must have been really messed up, so yeah, I missed Citrine even though I was a total basket case, I guess I should be thankful I didn't eat the rat poison. I don't need warfarin, aspirin is fine thank you.

Citrine: yeah and I don't want to go on a tiraid and kill everything on this planet just to bring you back...WHICH I WOULD DO ANYWAY! Albedo : thanks, just go after north Korea first, I really wanna see them rename it to the great Kim jung un crater. Which is going to happen anyway, once that pencil dick fucktard launches, everyone is gonna sign a 20 Kiloton or so nuke, then send it his way, laughing all the way as North Korea becomes a crater in the honor of the dumbest dictator in history. Not even hitler was that damned stupid. Citrine: true, very true love. Albedo: Poll time everyone, if I sold tickets to watch north korea get craterized, would you buy them? I might just broadcast the whole thing worldwide on twitch or something, 10 USD per head, or 25 for our family deal. Citrine: -_- really....REALLY?! Albedo: What? You saying we shouldn't have first class seats to watch common sense and Darwinism in action? Who doenst love watching worlds dumbest? Besides, if I could I probably would do what a certain antagonist is unknowingly doing to them, Plotting is afoot. Citrine: Do I need to activate plan 11?

Albedo: where am I going to get a steamroller?

Citrine: Draonic might have one? I Don't know Albedo: Sure, just spoil the fun for our readers, don't give anymore spoilers. Or Else I might just add caboose to this story.

Citrine: PLEASE GOD NO!!!!!!!!! ALBEdo: LOLOL! Done! Caboose: tucker did it Citrine: I hate you, but I still Love you Albedo:? I love you... too? Something, I just hurt my brain, I also just lit my shirt on fire while lighting a cigarette backwards, who the fuck is magic hat?

Citrine: .....What The Fuck DID I TELL YOU ABOUT LITING THAT SHIT ON BACKWARDS Albedo: I know, damnit, I am working on quitting. Still who the fuck is that see! Magic hat on discord, who is that?

Citrine: Someone I met a gmod server years ago....I kind of forgot that they were still on my friends list on Steam ^_^; edo: sure. Why not... so discord can hack steam, Citrine had surgery, Caboose is going to doom our souls, and oh yeah, plotting is afoot in chapter 3, also, I need another coke, and just wait until you see what I have in mind for Garfield, I mean meowth, whatever, he looks like a white Garfield, I am not a big pokemon fan, I am a fan of avatar and Red Faction, (big BIG hint) so see us next time in Project infinity, I need to talk to Citrine and we have something special in mind as a... project. Just you wait... ya might want to make sure no one is around because otherwise they are going to wonder if you are dying laughing... Citrine: been there, done that....Don't ask..... Albedo: yeah one person said you almost swallowed a fork? Never mind, anyway I pretty much had a demo of our... Project, I needed oxygen afterwards. I almost died laughing, hell I lost my lunch... no easy feat. Citrine: It's true...WTF?!?!?! I DID NOT SWALLOW A GODDAMNED FORK!!! Albedo: yes, and we are not dragging this A/N out to high hell, or heaven... whatever, anyway, I know you dint swallow a fork, also, I think you, our beloved readers are going to love... our project. As well as chapter 3, also we will be inserting an OST in the story soon, problem is, it's a book, so I am not sure if epic soundtracks fit in a book very well, but since its kinda gonna be micheal bay shit in some places and god knows what else in others, I expect a pretty damned diverse OST, as well as maybe some other stuff, also, big spoiler, in chapter 4 there will be nudity. Citrine: let me guess...will it be with Draonic?

Albedo: I don't know, but I do know however that we did like mass effect Andromeda, and are very much looking forward to the rebirth of the goddess in 2018, that's right, in my last project I lobbied for her, now, I am doing it again, vote for the supreme goddess, VOTE SHODAN 2018. And on that bombshell its time to end, good night folks.

Citrine: May God have mercy on my soul.....

Albedo: you mean caboose? Aww hell no.

Citrine: YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN Albedo: yeah I know you haven't made it that far in RvB, but you will... and you will laugh your ass off, as usual... Love ya honey. Expect chapter 3 and maybe a chapter from the Project which shall not be named sometime next week, also, do review and such, whatever you kids do these days, and don't give spoilers to less educated nerds please. Not everyone knows about every universe, like I do. Have a fun easter or whatever, and also keep in mind, I ... lost my mind, what was my line?

Citrine: Love ya too honey, and I don't know what it was, I can't read your mind...at least not yet anyway

Albedo: Kinky.... I like it. And on that Bombshell it really is time to end... good night everyone. Citrine: Indeed