Hopeless Liberation Chapter 12
Chapter 12
Dante
I lay in my bed, which was not nearly as soft as Orin's, waiting for sunlight to pour through my window and alert me that it was time to go to guard duty. The sheets were over me, enveloping my trousers and bare chest. I ran my right hand down them, letting their smoothness slide across the fur of my hand like water.
My mind reverted back to the carnal memory of the previous night, when I escorted an intoxicated Orin to his room and proceeded to fuck him. A feeling of guilt draped across me like a cloak. Did I do the right thing? Is one person's emotional well being less important than two lives?
_ _ Nothing good came of the questions I posed to myself, so I turned my focus onto something else. Gwen.
_ _ Immediately, I became engorged and my trousers became tighter. Why couldn't I get her out of my head? Certainly, she looked beautiful and had a fiery spark of moxie in her eyes. But why did she continue to fill my thoughts with her graceful presence? I had met many beautiful women and men, most of whom were whores. Also, Esme had a wealth of determination that always drove her. So why had I never thought about any of them like I had thought about Gwen during the past day?
I could still envision the bat bursting out of the barracks, naked and sword in hand. And, while recalling the dim light that crept through the clouds to illuminate her plump breasts, I slid a hand beneath my bed sheets and caressed the bulge in my trousers.
I looked over to my window and saw that the sun still hadn't risen, so I quickly lifted my knees and pulled my trousers down. After that, I lowered my knees back onto the mattress and stretched my loincloth just far enough downward that it remained underneath my balls so that my cock could stand up. Without hesitation, I began stroking my length, giving it the courage to fully emerge from its sheath and grow even larger.
I closed my eyes, exhaling as I did so, and allowed my imagination to place me inside of a bed with Gwen, who kissed my neck and lay beneath my naked body.
"Fuck me, Dante," the bat whispered into my ear before she kissed it.
"Anything for you, Gwen," I whispered back, lowering my pelvis and slowly easing into her warm inviting body.
The bat released a gratuitous moan and her thighs trembled against me. "Dante," she moaned as her wings wrapped themselves around my figure.
I lowered my muzzle, burying it into the fur at the base of Gwen's neck, inhaling her scent as if it were a perfume. My head became weightless, as if I had drunk a barrel of wine, and I quickened my thrusts. "I want you,"
"I want you, too," the witch said, pressing her cheek against mine while releasing another moan as I drew into her again.
Lovingly, I raised my head and kissed her, meeting the witch's tongue with my own so that we could commence the dance of a lover's kiss.
Instantly, my eyes snapped open and I bit my lip to prevent myself from screaming in bliss. Lukewarm cum sprayed up my belly and splattered against my fur, filling the room with its pungent scent. Slowly, as my heartbeat echoed in my chest, I slid my hand off of my cock and allowed it to fall onto the bed beside my thigh.
After a few breaths, I pulled up the sheets and used them to wipe my seed off my fur, before it could dry and clump my hairs together.
Once the bed sheets were wet and my chest was dry, I looked over at the window, which still only held darkness for me to see. Now I know why they call the City "Sleeping Sun."
My thoughts turned back to Gwen as I motionlessly lay against my bed. Even when she was kicked to the ground and beaten, the bat had still continued to fight, despite my expectations of her giving up. I had later heard how she bit off a piece of Fredrick's neck and I could only imagine how she still managed to summon the will do to so after being injured. She's so strong and...
_ _ I shook my head. I needed to stop thinking about her so much. But how could I have stopped thinking about someone that was so incredibly stunning and resilient? It felt like an impossible task.
I glanced at my desk, which sat in front of my window. Some sheets of paper lay in the bottom right corner and a bottle of ink, with a quill dipped inside of it, sat on top of them. I then began to wonder if writing my thoughts down on paper would have given me some relief. Better than letting them run around in my head.
_ _ Once I pulled my trousers and loincloth back up, I sauntered over to the desk and sat in my chair, which had my cloak draped over its back. I then moved the inkbottle to the left and picked up the sheet of paper that was on top of the paper stack, setting it directly before me on the center of the desk. Finally, the fingers of my right hand plucked the quill out of the inkbottle and began attempting to scribble together a poem.
The stones that are your eyes cast both fear and joy within me.
_ My heart leaps at the sight of their blue halos,_
_ yet my lungs quiver in fear of drowning inside their depths._
_ _
_ The sapphires of your tender face make me feel as rich as a king,_
_ but their steel glances terrify me,_
_ like a man at the sharp end of a blade._
_ _
_ The two glowing coals I stare into,_
_ whether it be during the newborns rays of the day or in the thick black cloak of night's secrecy,_
_ make all the angels in Heaven and all the devils in Hell envy me,_
_ for your eyes bear both the hope of stars and the desolation of burning rock._
_ _
_ And in those rings that shake my limbs with such emotion,_
_ there are two black ovals of emptiness,_
_ space for me to place myself within you._
_ It is a tiny space,_
_ I know,_
_ but any space I am given in the cavernous nature of your eyes would never satisfy my desire,_
_ even if they stretched across the sky from the moon to the pale cheeks of any star._
_ _
_ Yet I am happy to have a place in them at all,_
_ for they are sacrosanct orbs that I have been anointed with,_
_ eyes I could never have conjured in the depths of my most vivid fantasy._
_ _
_ _ I set the quill down in the inkbottle and re-read what I had written. When I reached the end, I set the paper down on the desk and withdrew my hand. What a shitty poem.
_ After rising from my chair, I looked out my window again and saw a small string of orange light dimly breaking through the black veil of the horizon. _Finally.
_ _ Moments later, I donned my suit of armor, tied my belt around me and strutted out the door with my rapier at my hip.
I descended down the wooden stairs, not noticing anybody else in any of the hallways. The only other men I saw up and about where the two guards on duty in front of the barracks, who I walked between after passing through the front door.
"Excuse me," I said to the two men on duty, turning to face them. "Could you give me directions to the southern gate?"
The knight on the left was the one who answered me. "You're the new guy?" he said, his helm clanking as the words spilled through it.
"That's me," I said, trying my best to be affable.
The knight raised an arm and pointed across the courtyard, towards Queen Talis' palace. "Go to the steps of the palace and walk right. Take the first left after the palace is behind you and walk straight. You'll find the wall of the City eventually. Walk with it at your left side and you should get to the gate,"
I reviewed the instructions in my mind, assuring myself that I hadn't forgotten any of them. "All right. Thank you,"
"Anytime," he said.
I turned and walked across the courtyard, passing by the small arena in which I had fought Dillon during the previous day. As the guard suggested, I turned right after reaching the palace steps and made a left turn once they were behind me, travelling deeper into the veins of the City and trotting down the cobbled road as houses enclosed me.
Above me hung the blanket of clouds, grey like the muzzle of an elderly widow and thick like a cold porridge. Hardly any sunlight passed through them and, as a result, the air caressed my armor with freezing fingertips that made snow seem as warm as a whore's bed. Even as I walked, I noticed a mist as dense as broth pouring through my visor every time I exhaled.It's almost like I'm back at the Fanged Peaks.
_ _ I recalled Queen Santel, the ruler of the Peaks, and how we both kept each other warm with a night of lascivious passion. She had been a good twenty years older than me, but she had still been very energetic in bed. And, as I recalled her sticking a few fingers inside my hindquarters as she lay under me, I felt my cock twitch, even though I had already cum that morning.
A feeling of despair soon washed over me when I remembered Queen Santel informing me about Capres coming to the Iron Pass with his new army. Hopefully, I can save Gwen and Peter before he gets there. If not...
_ _ I let out a sigh. If only I still had someone to discuss my worries with. Someone like Esme.
_ _ When was the last time I truly thought about Esme, rather than recall her in a brief moment of despair? A few days? Yes. That was right. Peter asked me about how I was dealing with her death after our sword practice not too long ago. Truthfully, the same emptiness that I had felt at her death still lingered inside of me like a parasite. It also didn't help remembering that she died with my gun pressed against her skull, the air between us filled with Esme's pleas for me to end her torment. I also felt worse every time I recollected being unable to have given her a simple burial. There hadn't been time. Her body, I was certain, probably fed a few wild raccoons or some kind of other scavenger. The thought of her, my oldest friend, being reduced to nothing but food made my chest feel all the more hollow as I continued to stroll down the chilly street in search of the southern gate.
Soon, after eventually reaching the City wall and walking with it to my left for quite some time, I finally arrived at my destination.
The gate itself was raised and its open mouth held a view of the green woods, which lingered around Sleeping Sun like wild wolves that circled their prey. However, the view of the forest was partially blocked by three knights, all of whom wore armor and were the same height as I was. The men stood in a semi-circle, one standing on either side of the entrance as the third stood between them. I tried to smell their scents and learn what species they were, but the cold air stung my nostrils and a sudden breeze that blew from my back prevented me from doing so.
"Told you he'd show," the knight on the right said to his friends.
"I'm sorry for being a little late," I said.
I considered informing them about how I had never been to the gate before and needed to ask for directions, but deemed that to be a poor idea, since it would have made it seem like I was trying to make excuses.
"Relax," the man continued to speak, finally focusing his attention towards me. "It's your first guard duty, right?"
"Yes,"
"Then it's no big deal," he said, before turning his helmet to look at the knight in the center as he continued to speak to me. "At least you showed up for your first time,"
The knight in the center sighed after noticing his comrade's stare, aware of what was being implied about him. "Don't act like you could be on guard duty with a hangover!"
"I'm not," the knight on the right laughed. "I'm saying you shouldn't have drank so much after going to Jessica's,"
The knight on the far left, who had been silent until now, turned his head to look at me. "Miller here got falling down drunk after his initiation at Jessica's. All the whoring went to his head and he forgot he had his first duty the next morning,"
"Captain almost strangled him later when he found out," the knight on the right added with a laugh. "He yelled until Miller woke up and fell ass-first out of bed,"
Miller sighed a second time. "Captain needs to lighten up. You know, it's really fucking weird how he doesn't drink or go to Jessica's,"
"It's like I always say," the knight on the left said, "he probably has one of those diseases that make you sick when you drink,"
"Diseases," Miller spat. "What kind of disease keeps a man from enjoying some wine?"
"He could be very religious," I suggested, trying to keep the knights from guessing that Orin was gay. If Orin's discovered, my chances of using him to save Gwen are gone.
_ _ "Maybe," the knight on the left said. "I always see him in church. I don't think he's ever missed a Sunday morning Mass,"
"No shit," Miller said. "He has to do that! He's the captain. If he didn't, the queen would kick his ass out of the City. If he looks bad, so does she,"
"And just going to church doesn't mean he's all that religious," the knight on the right added.
"It still doesn't mean he isn't," I said, fearing that anyone would soon suggest that Orin was gay if I didn't continue to intervene. "Look, what do we know? He goes to church every Sunday, doesn't drink and doesn't whore. Sounds more like a priest than a captain to me,"
"He's got a point," the knight on the left said.
"Look, new... What's your name?" Miller spoke.
"Aaron,"
"Look, Aaron," Miller continued, "I don't know what religious people are like where you're from, but the captain doesn't seem like someone who's a freak about Jesus and shit. I've never heard him bring up God or the Bible when we've talked. And, if he really was a Bible-fucker, why doesn't he try to stop us from going to Jessica's?"
I bit my tongue, trying to come up with some kind of explanation that would prevent the conversation from heading where I knew it would soon go, but nothing came to mind. Damn it.
_ _ When I was unable to respond to his question, Miller went on to say, "You see, I don't think the captain's religious or has some disease that keeps him from drinking. I think he's a faggot,"
Fear caved in my belly and I was glad that my new armor covered my fur, which now bristled with unease.
"There's no way in hell the captain's a faggot," the knight on the left said, shaking his head with skepticism.
"How do you, know?" Miller asked, snapping his head to the side in order to face the knight. "Do you spend a lot of time hanging out with faggots, Dustin?"
"No," Dustin growled through his visor, obviously irritated about being asked such a question, "but faggots can't stand looking at blood. They don't even have the balls to kill someone,"
"Also, he's never tried to fuck any of us," the knight on the right said. "Or, at least, he hasn't tried to fuck me. I don't know about you guys. And we all know faggots will fuck anything that moves, even wild animals,"
"He's got hands, doesn't he?" Miller pointed out. "He probably just jerks off to drawings he's got hidden away or something,"
"I still don't think he's a cocksucker," Dustin persisted. "Weird, yeah, but just keeping to yourself and not drinking doesn't mean a guy's a dick-licker or anything,"
"Really?" Miller said, his voice burning with frustration. "Not once have I seen him go to Jessica's, or hear someone say that they ever saw him there. And he's been a captain for a few years now. How the hell does a guy go that long without fucking some pussy?"
"Maybe he doesn't go to Jessica's," I suggested, still eager to throw the knights off Orin's trail. "There are other brothels here, right? He's a captain. He wants his men to revere him, not treat him like he's their friend. That's probably why he's never at Jessica's or Silvio's,"
"I don't know," Miller said, still not quite convinced. "The captain walks kinda faggoty, too,"
"What?" the knight on the right said. "You can't tell if someone's a faggot by how they walk,"
"Yeah, you can, Cedric," Miller said. "They sway their hips a little every time they take a step,"
"He wears armor," Dustin reminded him. "We all do! It's not easy to move in, not even for guys who've been knights for years. Of course you're going to walk funny. You're wearing forty or fifty pounds of metal over your whole body,"
"Wait," Cedric said, interrupting the argument. "I just remembered something,"
The knight then turned his head to look directly at me. "Tanner was on guard duty last night and told me the captain came home drunk with you,"
Beneath my suit of armor, my tail twitched and my heart seemed to drum loudly.
"Yeah," I said, trying not to allow my tenseness to show in my voice. "Dillon had taken me to Silvio's for a drink and the captain showed up,"
"What the hell was the captain doing there?" Miller asked.
My tail sank between my legs. How much did Cedric know?
"He said he just got back from visiting Vercer," I said, deciding to give the same story that I gave to the guards outside of the barracks the night before. "The captain saw how Vercer tortured some Talth and really needed a drink,"
"Jesus," Dustin said. "I'm surprised he's still alive. I probably wouldn't have stopped drinking until I choked on my own puke after seeing that shit,"
Cedric nodded in agreement. "Vercer's fucking insane,"
Miller, unlike his two comrades, didn't seem convinced. "So, after being a knight for years, he just up and decides to get drunk for the first time ever?"
I shrugged at his suspicion. "That's what he told me. He saw the body of a Talth. Apparently, Vercer castrated him,"
"I still have a hard time believing the captain got drunk because of that, especially in front of a new recruit," Miller said with cold resistance.
"Come on, Miller," Dustin said. "Seeing some guy who's had his balls cut off would be enough to make anyone drink themselves half to death,"
"I don't know. It just seems weird to me," Miller said.
What more does this guy want? There wasn't anything else that I could have told Miller, but should I have said something else? The story was already believable and I didn't want to say more than I needed to, for fear of being caught in the details of my lie.
A scream erupted behind me.
I turned around and saw a young snow leopard, who was about six or seven years old, running toward me, naked as the day his mother birthed him from her womb. Close behind him, a nude gray wolf hurried after the boy, wearing a wooden cross that was tied around his neck and holding a sharpened knife in his right hand, his erect cock bouncing with every step he took in pursuit of the boy.
"Help!" the boy cried, sliding to a halt. "The priest tried to put his pee-pee in me!"
My hand seemed to find my sword's grip very quickly, but, as the steel of my rapier tasted the fresh morning air, the priest turned and fled back through an alleyway.
Without thinking, I charged, ignoring how difficult it was to run with armor on and not stopping to see if the other knights were following me.
As I turned and sprinted down the alley that the priest had ran through, I saw the tip of the wolf's tail duck around a house just up ahead as he made a right turn.
I ran and turned right around the house, noticing the priest just before he made a left turn two houses ahead of me. I could have already caught him if I wasn't wearing this damn armor. Or if I had my gun.
_ _ I made a left turn where the priest had and stopped after a few steps, not seeing where the he had gone. I was just behind him. How could he have-?
_ _ A flash of metal sparked out of the corner of my vision and I barely raised my armored hand in time to catch the blade before it sank its tip through the slits of my visor.
While the knife tried to slide through my armored fingers, I turned my head and smashed my helmet against something hard. Immediately, the knife became still and I heard a thud behind me.
As I turned with my rapier in my right hand and the knife in my left, I saw the priest on the ground, leaning against the wall of a house as streaks of blood slid down from his nose. His hands quickly found his bleeding nostrils and tried to comfort them, causing blood to squeeze between the wolf's fingers and dampen their fur with a fresh scarlet coat.
"You're under arrest," I said, raising the tip of my sword to his throat.
"By whose law?" the priest muffled through his hands.
"The queen's," I answered. "For trying to rape that little boy,"
The priest laughed. "It's not the queen's law I abide by. It's God's,"
"So God told you to rape that boy?" I demanded, feeling my fangs bare inside of my helmet.
"Not directly," the priest said. "I'm not one of those lunatics who hear voices,"
"You're claiming that the Bible says its okay for you to force yourself onto children, the same Book that tells you to treat others how you want to be treated?"
The priest glared at me, his brown eyes narrowing as they burned with condemnation. "The Bible only says raping women is wrong, but doesn't mention raping men or children. So I can indulge myself with their flesh as much as I want,"
I pressed the tip of my sword against the priest's neck, causing a fresh drop of blood to fall from his throat and land on the string that held the cross against his bare chest, which was full of grey hairs. "Does the Bible say anything about me killing you?"
The priest laughed again. "I'm a holy man! What do you think God will do if you murder me? Reward you?"
"Am I supposed to let you go? You might be locked up for a little while. You might not even be able to be a priest anymore. But, eventually, you'll try to hurt someone else like you tried to hurt that boy. And, if I don't kill you, I'll be just as guilty for their suffering,"
That caused the priest's ears to fall back with concern. "B-But you'll burn in Hell for all eternity!"
"Then I guess we'll burn together," I said, sliding the body of my rapier through the wolf's neck and covering his wooden cross with blood, which poured onto the pavement beneath my armored paws.
I pulled my sword from the still wolf's throat a moment later, causing even more blood to spurt down his collarbone, and turned to leave him bleeding alone in the alley.
Soon, I reached the southern gate, my sword still dripping with the priest's blood, and found the three knights talking with the little boy.
Dustin looked up as I neared the group and said something that I couldn't make out.
Simultaneously, the boy and the remaining two knights looked up as I continued to approach.
The boy took a few steps away from the knights and stood in front of me as I stopped walking. "Is he...dead?"
I nodded my head, unsure of exactly what to say.
Suddenly, the boy stretched out his arms and hugged my right leg. His head lowered and pressed against the side of my thigh. "Thank you,"
Slowly, I dropped the priest's knife and patted the young snow leopard on the head. "You're welcome," You're safe now, you and the other children he would have hurt.
_ _ "What happened?" Dustin asked me.
I looked up from the naked boy, who still held onto my leg, and cleared my throat, preparing the lie that I was about to tell. "He hid behind a corner and tried to stab me as I walked by. I told him to drop the knife, but he still attacked. So I killed him,"
At first, I expected the knights to scold or arrest me, but, surprisingly, they didn't seem to mind.
"Good," Dustin said. "One less faggot in the world,"
I winced beneath my helmet, wanting to say that gay people don't stalk through the night searching for children to rape, but I held my tongue. I still needed to rescue Gwen and Peter, so I couldn't have drawn any attention to myself.
"I'll take the kid home," Miller offered.
"Good idea," Cedric said. "We'll all stay here and keep guarding the gate,"
Miller walked over to me and the boy released my leg.
"Let's go," the knight said to the snow leopard, kindly offering him his armored hand.
"Okay," the boy said, placing a hand in Miller's, which slowly gripped his.
Both of them then walked past me and disappeared into the alley from which I had come.
One less faggot in the world.
_ _ Dustin's words still stung me, making fear crawl along my back. No wonder Orin was so afraid of having his sexuality discovered. The knights hated gay people more than I could have ever suspected! Then again, were they the ones to blame? They probably had received their misconceptions about gay people from their parents or friends. And I'm sure it didn't help that they probably knew no openly gay people who also didn't prey on little boys.
At least we aren't debating Orin's sexuality anymore. Maybe nobody would have continued to suspect Orin's secret, since he wasn't trying to rape anybody like the priest. Yet, despite trying to calm myself during the rest of my guard duty, I still feared Orin being discovered and having my plans of saving Peter destroyed.