Alone: Chapter 5
Alone Chapter 5: The brutal end The day after was... weird. Well, it was also interesting again but weird. I went downstairs and was greeted by my mom. "Hello, sweetie!" she greeted. "Hey." I said back. "Um, did you get a job yet?" she asked. "Um, no not yet." I replied. "You never make any effort to find a job, you need to, you can't stay here forever." she scolded. "I know, I will try to find one today." I told her. She had the look of disappointment and anger. She didn't believe me and frankly, I didn't either. I went back to my room and sat on my couch. "Good morning, babe." Payton greeted. "Hey." I said sadly. "What's wrong?" he asked. "My mom is getting on me about not having a job." I explained to him. "Well you really do need one." he informed me. "Well, i'm trying." i told him. "Okay, i'm about to leave to go to work." He told me. "Ok" I said quietly. I always dreamed of going to a nice place just to get away. Now is the time I drift off into those imaginary places only rich people can go. I'm not rich, just sad and depressed. It was the next day and me and Payton argued last night about me and not having a job. We also argued about my habit to wine. I was running out of money to buy it and I told him. Not the smartest move by me either. He told me he couldn't love me any more if I didn't try to get a job and do other stuff like support my family and him alittle. I knew that, I know I owed him and my mom the world, but some people couldn't even support themselves. It was hard for me, I was a human in a furry world. What could I do if no one wanted a human to work at their establishment. I didn't tell them. They wouldn't believe me anyways. I was sad that night and was alone. I went on and slept on the couch that night. It was morning now and everyone was asleep. I went into the bathroom wit nmy knife. I looked in the mirror and cried. "Just when I thought everything was going good," I thought in my head. Nothing ever went well for me so why try to carry on, I have nothing to live for anymore. Me and Payton practically broke up now. All of this I thought as I dug the knife blade into my wrist. With every line I made I ran through my memories, those very short lasting memories. I wish I have savored them more. Almost everyone in the household was angery with
me. I was finished cutting and everyone was awake. I joked to myself that my mom was saving money by me not eating breakfast or dinner. My mom and Payton didn't speak nor tried to look at me that day. Me and Payton broke up that day, the day after my birthday. I got a call an hour ago about me building a company three cars for 2 million dollars. I turned the offer down and told my sister and my mom about it. "ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?" Crystal screamed at me. "Don't be so hard on him, he probly found a way better job, didn't you?" my mom asked. "No." I replied sadly. "Then why didn't you take the job?" my mom asked. "To be honest I don't know." I replied. I went upstairs and was greeted by Payton. "Wow, you're fucking up this week aren't you?" he asked. "Please give me a break today?" I asked him. "If you want a break, how about you get a job?" he asked. I walked into the bathroom. "Nice, now the whole house is against me, how about I just commit suicide, it will surely be easier." I told myself. "I wonder if they still know i'm still suicidal or did they forget? All I know right now is I want to die alone and slowly." It was a year later and everyone went to dinner that night. They didn't invite mr because of me not having a job. I've got the loneliness and time I need for me to commit suicide. I am well aware they don't want me to die and it wasn't intention but they forgot. How should I go though? So many ways, I say say so casually too. I'm not going back to the human dimention either, I heard there was an apocolipse happening. Sounds fun, right? "Well how I go?" I asked myself. "I have a gun with a silencer on it, no one will hear me, plus if I shoot myself in the right spot I will bleed out slowly." I cried to myself. "I don't want to do this, but I have to." I took a nap since they wouldn't be home for quiet a long while. 30 minutes later I woke up. I got up and grabbed my gun. I headed for the back wall of my room and sat against it. "I bet the whole world would appreciate this." I told myself. I held the gun up to my and looked into the barrel. I then moved the gun to my chest. "Well, after the twenty two years i've been alive, i've yet to find happiness." I told myself crying. "I wanted to live but no one else approved of that, did they?" "Well, now's my time to do what everyone in this dimension wanted me to do for so long, here's... my... job." The gun went off without a sound and I sat there gasping for air. "What did I do?" I asked myself. "Want everyone wanted you to do." my conscious told me. I admired my scars, the old ones and the new ones. They were blurring, everything was blurring. I saw the brightness start to grow. The pain started to spread throughout my
body. "Finally... I can be alone, forever." I cried to myself. "No one around me." "I'm... sorry!" I gasped my last words. "I'm so sorry." With that I passed away. June 25, my anniversary. It was 12:00 am and they finally came home. Everything was silent in the house. "Steven must be sleeping." my mom pointed out. "Well goodnight, I am going to go to sleep." Payton said. "With Steven?" Crystal asked. "Yeah, I can't stay mad at him." he told Crystal. Man I wish he said that sooner. Payton quietly walked upstairs to my room and opened the door and turned the lights on. He gasped and started to cry. "No, please no, let this be a joke." he said to himself. He quickly ran back downstairs. "What's wrong?" my mom asked. "It's Steven, he killed himself." he was hysterical. "No, you're lying." Crystal said starting to cry. Why are they so hurt, they should have saw this coming, after all I can't live forever... anymore. It was the next day and they arranged a funeral for my only my family and their close friends came. What they thought was to early was to long for me. It was long but they eventually moved on, like I predicted.